Door of Hope – Participant's Manual

By Helen Meyer and Linda McKay

Door of Hope is a supportive and encouraging program for female survivors of sexual abuse. In an environment of support and loving acceptance, women will have an opportunity to share their journey and to grow through increased levels of connection and trust. Participants will find tools for living beyond coping and begin to discover more about their true value and uniqueness. This program provides an opportunity for participants to grieve their losses and to receive mutual support from one another as they work through similar challenges and struggles. It invites participants to try new behaviours and provides a confidential and safe place to develop enhanced levels of self-esteem. Additionally, the group setting allows for healthy emotional intimacy and connectedness to develop. The Door of Hope experience normalises many of the participant's struggles, provides increased insight through the teaching, and empowers them to bring positive change into their lives. The manual supports the ten video teaching sessions which are an integral part of the Door of Hope program.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Allan Meyer
• Release date: Apr 20, 2022
• ISBN: 9798201852597

Helen Meyer

Helen Meyer is the Director and co-founder of Careforce Lifekeys International.  She is a trained primary and high school teacher and holds a Postgraduate Diploma in Human Relationships from Melbourne University, a Master in Education (Adult Ed) from Monash University, a Master in Counselling from Monash University, and a Master in Science and Medicine (Sexual Health) from Sydney University.  Helen and her husband Allan co-founded the Lifekeys ministry, developing 15 courses that address relationship, life, and faith issues. Lifekeys has been established in thousands of churches and counselling organisations in Australia, New Zealand, Europe, USA, Russia, and many other countries around the world. Helen’s own personal journey of healing from the impact of being raised in a household with chemical dependency and the early loss of her mother assists her in sharing the healing process in a practical way.  Helen is currently the director of a Counselling Centre in Melbourne, Australia.

Book preview

door of hope - session one arena of healing

the arena of healing

What do we mean by the term Recovery?

•  To regain something lost or taken away

•  To regain a former state or condition after a misfortune

•  To regain a former state by liberation from capture or possession

•  To obtain title to something by judgement in a court of law

•  To make good loss or damage to oneself

•  To regain the strength, composure, balance of oneself

•  To regain what was intended but never realised

Healing and health are associated with recovery

•  To make whole or entire

•  To restore that which was diseased or wounded to a place of soundness

•  To restore normal function

•  That state of a person in which the parts are sound, well organized and well related, in which they all perform freely their natural functions

In this state the person feels no pain.

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the process of healing

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four interrelated areas of recovery

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spiritual work

Beginning a relationship with God, learning to trust God, experiencing forgiveness, discovering the power of prayer, receiving the power of God’s Spirit, freedom from spiritual oppression, spiritual warfare.

cognitive work

Learning new things, un-learning old things, understanding new ideas, bible study, renewing the mind, confronting the lies, re-thinking faulty beliefs, learning to tell yourself the truth.

feelings work

Allow yourself to feel your feelings, learning to identify feelings, learning a vocabulary to express feelings and taking responsibility for how you express feelings. Learning to resolve emotional issues.

behaviour work

Identifying behaviour patterns, taking responsibility for your behaviour, structuring your life for change, making it easy to do the right thing and hard to do the wrong thing, exercising group support and accountability.

where the blessings are found

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getting into the arena of healing

attitude # 1: humility (the poor in spirit)

I recognize that I have deficiencies within myself that I am incapable of rectifying in my own strength. I need help – both your’s and God’s.

Recovery represents a prime opportunity for a person to exercise humility and brokenness. Telling the truth about your weaknesses, struggles and failures can be the beginning of humility. Pride, self-confidence and appearance management are the enemies of humility. Group processing in itself is an act of humility – just try it yourself and you will discover the humility required for openness and honesty.

attitude # 2: emotional honesty (those who mourn)

I will no longer deny, ignore or repress my emotional pain. I will weep my tears, groan my groans, cry my cries, and grieve my grief. My emotions are indicators of my heart’s condition and I will admit to them freely.

Denial, repressed emotions, appearance management are enemies of the healing process. Pretence must come to an end for those who would be healthy. Jesus calls us to feelings work. It looks bad when people mourn. This alone can make some people want to avoid recovery ministry in their churches. There is a temptation to opt for appearance management. Yet it is vital for healing that people be permitted to be on the outside as they are on the inside – although it should be said that such expressions of honesty ought not to be out of control, or so extreme as to make the group an unsafe place for other participants.

attitude # 3: teachable (the meek)

I am prepared to receive the assistance of others. I will no longer hide myself from accountability, nor will I shield myself from loving reflection. With a gentle spirit I am willing to hear your insights and without judging you I am willing to share mine with you.

All of us could have grown more in our lives, if we had been open enough to receive all the help that is available to us in the reflections of others. It takes a heart of gentleness to be able to receive challenging reflections without defending ourselves or punishing the messenger.

attitude # 4: proactive (the hungry)

I am not prepared to go on living the way I am. I want to be changed. I want more than just to cope through the use of unhealthy behaviour patterns. I want to be truly human, truly whole; I want to be right within my whole being.

There is no guarantee of healing for those in pursuit of happiness or instant gratification. The search that leads to healing may begin with a cry for the pain to stop or a hope that happiness might be found, but healing only comes to those whose goal ultimately becomes wholeness rather than happiness. The Kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. Peace and joy will not be found without righteousness. Righteousness is firstly a gift of God in Christ, then a work of grace in the makeup of those who will go beyond coping, to character and uprightness. It is a challenge to every facilitator to engage this attitude without sounding religious.

attitude # 5: forgiving (the merciful)

"As I need mercy I understand that others need it also. I will seek to help others to achieve what I am seeking for myself. I will open my heart to the needs of others, as I desire to have