Healing During the Holidays: God Heals the Bereaved

By Dr. Samuel White III

How do you cope with death and loss during the holidays? What do you do when you are feeling sad, stressed, empty and lonely during Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years’ Day, Mother’s and Father’s Day? Healing during the Holidays is an essential book for everyone who is grieving the death of a loved one. It is a grief self-help guide that comforts the broken hearted and heals the wounded spirit. If you are experiencing the holiday blues, this book is for you.

Healing During the Holidays shows you how to:
• grieve and still enjoy the holidays.
• develop an attitude of gratitude during Thanksgiving.
• experience the Christmas gifts of peace, hope, joy, faith and love.
• participate in a Healing Advent service that honors the deceased and our Lord.
• experience God as a Mother for the Motherless and God as a Father for the Fatherless.
• experience New Year’s Day by grieving the past and planning for the future
• cope with special days: birthdays, Wedding anniversaries, Valentine’s day, Memorial Day.
• comfort the bereaved during the holidays and beyond.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Mar 9, 2020
• ISBN: 9781973687658

Dr. Samuel White III

Dr. Samuel White, III is a graduate of Harvard Divinity School, Pastor, Spiritual Care Manager, prolific writer of 14 books, and founder of Agape Theological Seminary. Dr. White wrote this self-help book to inspire readers, to love themselves, live in the moment, have an attitude of gratitude and enjoy life with Jesus.

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Copyright © 2020 Dr. Samuel White, III.

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Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.comThe NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

Scripture quotations marked NLV are taken from the New Life Version, copyright © 1969 and 2003. Used by permission of Barbour Publishing, Inc., Uhrichsville, Ohio 44683. All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8764-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8766-5 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8765-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2020904048

WestBow Press rev. date: 03/05/2020

God heals the brokenhearted and bindeth up their wounds. - Psalm 147:3

I

dedicate this book to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who comforts our broken heart and heals our wounded soul.

CONTENTS

Acknowledgement

Introduction

Chapter 1     Healing the Holiday Blues

Chapter 2     Healing During Thanksgiving

Chapter 3     Healing During Christmas

Chapter 4     Healing During New Year’s Day

Chapter 5     Healing During Mothers’ Day

Chapter 6     Healing During Fathers’ Day

Appendix 1   Tips on Healing for the Holidays

Appendix 2   Comforting the Bereaved during the Holidays

Appendix 3   Healing During Special Days

Notes

Bibliography

About The Author

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

I want to thank our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who inspired me to write this book. I praise him for his patience and long suffering. It amazes me what God can accomplish through an unworthy, lethargic servant who still uses two-fingers to type.

I praise God for my lovely wife, son, daughter, mother, and siblings who have showed me unconditional love. I am especially grateful for their support when I suffered the death of family members and friends.

I am grateful for the opportunity to render grief counseling to the members of the Friendship Baptist Church, and the participants of the PACE program. I gained a wealth of wisdom from comforting the bereaved which was a source of practical knowledge for this book.

I appreciate being a faculty member of the Ecumenical Theological Seminary where I have the privilege of instructing seminarians on the grieving process and pastoral ministry. The dynamic dialogue between myself and the students has developed my Christology and theological foundation.

Finally, I am thankful for Rev. Greer-Stevens, Minister Bean, Deacons, Wounded Healers and Culinary Ministry who assist me in comforting bereaved families. A special thanks for Mrs. Elaine Rainey for editing this book.

INTRODUCTION

The holiday season for most people is an enjoyable time of the year filled with parties, feast, festivities, and social gatherings. Holidays are supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, however, for some people they are filled with stress, sadness, despair, anxiety, fatigue and loneliness.

Many people dread the holidays, especially those who are grieving the death of a loved one. Every holiday celebration becomes an unbearable event making them feel sad, lonely, anxious, and depressed.

Depression may occur at any time of the year, but the sorrow and loneliness during the months of November and December can be overwhelming. The seasonal change, the lack of sun light, stress of the holidays, isolation and grieving the death of a loved one can create the Holiday Blues.

When a person has the Holiday Blues they may withdraw from friends and family. They isolate themselves and rarely attend social gatherings. Some feel sad and tearful, others are unusually quiet, anti-social, irritable, belligerent, angry, and even hostile.

The Holiday Blues makes people abuse drugs, alcohol, casino gaming, and sex to cope with their inner pain. The gloominess of the holidays has them acting out and saying and doing things they normally would not.

Some experience erratic sleep patterns, disruption in their appetite, and abuse of alcohol and drugs to cope with their desolation. They try to comfort their sadness with superficial celebrations and carnal pleasures of the world and end up feeling dissolute and depressed.

One of the most devastating symptoms of the Holiday Blues is suicide. The suicide rates are extraordinarily high. Every forty seconds, we lose somebody to suicide. 1 Suicide remains a major public health problem, one that occurs throughout the year. It is the 10th leading cause of death for all Americans. Each year, more than 36,000 people take their own lives. In addition, more than 374,000 are treated in emergency departments for self-inflicted injuries. 2

It was Thanksgiving Day and a family was sitting at the dinner table. There was a festive mood in the air as the children and teenagers were talking, laughing and playing amongst themselves.

Everyone appeared to be having a good time, except one troubled teenager. He was grieving the death of his best friend who recently died. He took the death of his close friend exceptionally hard and you could see the sadness and despair in his face. He seemed weak and worn-out, moved slowly like a zombie. He was failing in High School and spent most of his time hanging out on the streets and using drugs.

He was really going through a difficult time, but no one seemed to care. He was detached and disconnected from his family. They treated him as if he was invisible. They did not seem to see or hear him.

Everyone was seated around the dinner table. A huge turkey was in the center surrounded by delicious side dishes. The parents sat at the heads of the table; the children sat talking and laughing with one another. The troubled teenager said, I have an announcement to make. Everyone kept talking, ignoring the young man. He said it again, I have an announcement to make. No one paid any attention to him. Again, he said with a loud voice, I have something to say! Everyone continued to talk over him. Suddenly, the troubled teenager pulled out a gun, put it at the side of his head and shot himself. The family screamed in horror. They rushed him to the hospital. Miraculously, he survived the mortal wound and thankfully his family finally began to listen to them.

You or your loved ones may never get to the point of contemplating suicide; however, depression and suicide are real, especially during the holidays and it takes more than family, friends, cards, gifts, songs, good food and drinks to address grief and loss.

During these difficult days, it takes the love and the grace of God to comfort, heal and deliver us from the abyss of hopelessness and despair. Only a loving God can reach down into the depths of our soul and heal us of our grief. Our God is a healer who comforts the brokenhearted and lifts the downtrodden soul. Like the Psalmist we can say, I waited patiently for the Lord and He heard my cry and brought me up out of the miry clay and set my foot upon a rock and established my goings. He hath put a new song in my mouth and praises unto our God. (Psalm 40:1-4) God hears the cries of the bereaved, lifts them from their despair and heals them during the holidays.

Healing During the Holidays is a comforting self-help book for those who are grief stricken during Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and other Special Days. God is with the bereaved and "He