Eat Your Dessert First: Enjoying Life with Jesus

By Dr. Samuel White III

Are sick and tired of being sick and tired? Are you ready to enjoy your life? Do you tend take care of everyone and neglect yourself? Are you waiting for someone else to make you happy? If you answered yes to any of these questions, it is time to Eat Your Dessert First. You have waited and cared for others long enough. You cannot love others unless you love yourself. It is time for you to experience the abundant life and:

• love yourself physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually
• experience the joy of the Lord and enjoy life
• discover your divine identity and purpose in life
• learn how to live in the moment and develop an attitude of gratitude

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: May 25, 2023
• ISBN: 9781973698548

Dr. Samuel White III

Dr. Samuel White, III is a graduate of Harvard Divinity School, Pastor, Spiritual Care Manager, prolific writer of 14 books, and founder of Agape Theological Seminary. Dr. White wrote this self-help book to inspire readers, to love themselves, live in the moment, have an attitude of gratitude and enjoy life with Jesus.

Book preview

cover.jpg

Other books by Dr. Samuel White III

What They Do Not Teach You at Harvard Divinity School: Minister’s Manual

Invictus: Overcoming the Coronavirus

The Forgiving Soul: How to Forgive Yourself, Others, and Life

Sex and the Soul: Overcoming Temptation

Loving the Soul: How to Love

Caring for Your Soul: Improving Your Life

Healing the Soul: Christian Self-Care

It is Well with My Soul: Spiritual Care for the Dying

No More Tears: Comfort for the Bereaved

Dying in Peace: Preparing for Eternity

Capitalist Christian Contradiction: God Against Greed

My Brother’s Keeper: Church Ministry for Young African American Males

Healing During the Holidays: God Comforts the Bereaved

Hope For Your Soul: Words of Encouragement

All books are available online.

EAT YOUR

DESSERT

First

Enjoying Life with Jesus

DR. SAMUEL WHITE, III

Copyright © 2023 Dr. Samuel White, III.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means,

graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by

any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author

except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher

make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book

and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

844-714-3454

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in

this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views

expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the

views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the Holy Bible, King James Version

(Authorized Version). First published in 1611. Quoted from the KJV Classic

Reference Bible, Copyright © 1983 by The Zondervan Corporation.

Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy

Bible, New International Version®, NIV®.

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc.™

Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American

Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973,

1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version.

Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-9736-9853-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-9855-5 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-9854-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2023909365

WestBow Press rev. date:  05/22/2023

I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

—John 10:10 (KJV)

To Anna Mae White (October 15, 1931–March 13, 2021), who

taught others to love, laugh, learn, and eat your dessert first.

Contents

Preface

Introduction

Chapter 1     Loving Yourself

Chapter 2     Laughing at Life

Chapter 3     Learning about Yourself

Chapter 4     Eat Your Dessert First

Final Thoughts

Notes

About the Author

Preface

I will never forget the day my mother died. Early on a Saturday morning, my younger sister called to give me the devastating news. Even though I knew she was dying of Alzheimer’s disease, her death shattered my soul. I felt extremely sad, empty, and broken.

My wife and children saw the sadness on my face and embraced me. They held my broken soul together with their love and prayed for me. I thanked God for their love, but I needed to go to the church and talk to the Lord. I needed to be alone to process my grief and receive the healing from the Lord.

Tears streamed down my face as I slowly drove to the church. I struggled to keep my eyes on the road and navigate the traffic of thoughts and feelings in my head. I felt disoriented, disappointed, despondent, lost, motherless, angry, helpless, and hopeless. It was a miracle that I made it to the church without getting into an accident.

I walked into the church. The pews were empty, and so was my soul. There was no joy, hope, or peace in my soul. The church was eerily silent, and so was my voice. Grief had silenced my soul. There were no words that I could say to God. The only thing I did was sit in silence.

I stared at the large wooden cross hanging over the pulpit and reflected on its meaning during death and grief. I was reminded of Jesus’s redemptive suffering on the cross, which brings healing and comfort to the brokenhearted. It is by his stripes, his sacrifice, that we are healed emotionally and spiritually. The hymn writer was right,

At the Cross, at the cross where I first saw the light and the burden of my heart rolled away. It was there by faith I received my sight and now I am happy all the day.

I smiled and cried when I reflected on my mother’s life. She was a beautiful, cheerful, spiritual, loving, intelligent, independent, and elegant African American woman who truly aged gracefully. She was a devoted wife, a marvelous mother of six children, a successful Realtor, and a joyful soul.

I have so many wonderful memories of her. I remember her warm smile, laughter, silliness, and love for life. I remember hearing her soft voice singing Happy Birthday to me on the phone. She would keep singing until we both laughed.

I still can see her sitting at the kitchen table, eating glazed doughnuts, drinking coffee, talking about the Lord, looking at the family picture album and laughing at the pictures, and reminiscing about the good old days.

I will never forget when we played bingo together. She was able to watch five bingo cards, and she used quarters as markers. I had one bingo card and struggled to keep up. I can still hear her yelling, Bingo!

I miss talking to her. We would talk about the Lord, my sermons, grandchildren, family matters, the struggles of the ministry, politics, the men who flirted with her, and corny jokes. Our conversations always ended with her praising and thanking God.

I miss my mother’s infectious laughter. Her laughter filled up a room and made everyone smile. She had a childlike spirit, and she loved to act silly and be playful. She was full of joy and zeal for life.

I have so many good memories of my mother, but the one that inspires me the most is a statement: Love, learn, laugh and eat your dessert first. My mother recited this quote often, and she lived it. She ate her dessert first. She lived her life to the fullest. She did not spend her time crying and complaining about what she did not have. She praised and thanked God for what she did have. She placed a premium on living for God, self-care, loving others, learning, and laughter. She lived in the moment and thoroughly enjoyed her life.

My mother was not a religious person, and she rarely went to church. However, there was a depth to her spirituality that made her a loving, peaceful, and joyful person. For ninety-three years, she lived her life like it was golden.

Every day was a celebration for her. She was always smiling and laughing. She would always find reasons to be happy and laugh. She would act silly on purpose, and she did not mind singing a Johnny Mathis classic or dancing to a Motown hit. Rarely did I see her angry, upset, or worried. She always had a smile on her face, praise on her lips, a twinkle in her eye, and a pep in her step.

COPD, kidney disease, and dementia did not dampen her spirits. She reframed her negative experiences and saw them from a positive perspective. She even joked about her Alzheimer’s: I bought this book on dementia, but I keep forgetting to read it.

She made every moment count and enjoyed the simple things in life. She prayed to God, loved her family, sang her music, read her books, ate her glazed doughnuts, drank her coffee, played bingo, and occasionally went to Vegas to play the penny slots. My mother always found a way to enjoy her life with God.

Even at the end of her life, with all her physical challenges, my mother remained upbeat, loving, smiling, laughing, and worshipping God. In fact, she died in her sleep with a smile on her face.

My mother, Anna Mae White, ate her dessert first. She lived in the moment and was intentional about self-care and enjoying herself. She had the self-awareness to take of herself spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, and physically. She left her family and the world a legacy of spiritual self-joy. She showed us that we can live in the moment and choose to enjoy God, ourselves, and others.

I wrote this book in honor of my mother and to remind myself and others that we cannot love and care for others if we do not love and care for ourselves. Self-love is the foundation of a holy, happy, and healthy life.

We have a choice about how we live our lives. We can choose to live by choice and not by chance; be motivated and not manipulated; be useful and not used; and make changes and not excuses. We can choose joy over sorrow, hope over despair, faith over fear, and peace over anxiety. We can choose to eat our dessert first.

Introduction

In Aesop’s The Goose and the Golden Egg, a poor farmer visits the nest of his goose one day and finds a glittering golden egg. Though he suspects it is a trick, he decides to take it home. To his delight, he learns that the egg is actually pure gold.

Every morning, the farmer gathers one golden egg from the nest of the goose, and he soon becomes fabulously wealthy. However, he also grows greedy and impatient with the output of the goose. The farmer cuts open the goose, but he finds nothing.

The moral of this tale has a contemporary message. Some of us are like the farmer, and we are so consumed with getting our golden eggs that we sacrifice our physical, emotional, spiritual, social, and mental health on the altar of avarice. In our competitive pursuit for