Butterflies in the Midst: The Lord Is Near in Grief and Confusion

By Sally Anderlitch

How are we to live when the unthinkable happens, when our hearts are shattered and our foundation shaken? How can we find our way in overwhelming grief and overwhelming confusion? The author explains her experience enduring exactly that kind of tragedy. You will be surprised, as she was, by the message and messengers of hope. She describes her grief journey and how she found that the Lord is indeed near. You too will find Him near as you read Butterflies in the Midst. Gods love and grace are evident and current in this real-life story. The back of the book includes a guide for those grieving any type of sorrow and loss, as well as other helpful resources. The Word of God will breathe new life into you as you draw near to Him in this hope-filled book.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jan 25, 2016
• ISBN: 9781512724837

Sally Anderlitch

Sally spent her young years in Wisconsin and Colorado. Marriage and the military took her and her husband, Bob, to Washington, Illinois, Arkansas, Arizona, Texas, and West Germany. Motherhood and the Maker took her to new joy and new sorrow of abiding love. She has taught in the public schools along the way. The Lord has sustained her through more than twenty years of chronic illness. Sally and her husband reside in north Texas. They enjoy gardening and exploring God’s amazing created world.

Book preview

Butterflies

in the

Midst

The Lord Is Near in Grief

and Confusion

Sally Anderlitch

38047.png

Copyright

© 2016 Sally Anderlitch.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture quotations marked (ESV) are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (KJV) are taken from King James Version of the Bible. (Public Domain.)

Scripture taken from THE MESSAGE (MSG). Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE ®, (NASB) ®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations taken from New International Version® (NIV)® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Trademark. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2484-4 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2485-1 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2483-7 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2015921215

Print information available on the last page.

WestBow Press rev. date: 1/18/2016

Contents

Foreword

Preface

Acknowledgments

Butterflies in the Midst

If

your

heart

is

broken

you

will

find

God

right

there

if

you

are

kicked

in

the

gut

He

will

help

you

catch

your

breath

Epilogue

A Note to Those Who Grieve

Appendix A

If

your

heart

is

broken

you

will

find

God

right

there

if

you

are

kicked

in

the

gut

He

will

help

you

catch

your

breath

Appendix B

Appendix C

Appendix D

Resources

Bibliography

For sisters (and brothers) who grieve

And will hope in the Lord.

—John 11

If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there;

if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

—Psalm 34:18 MSG

Foreword

I am privileged to know Sally and her husband, Bob, and consider them dear friends. My wife and I knew them and their children when we were all much younger; their three kids played with our three kids. As their friend and brother in Christ and as a fellow parent, I was heartbroken for them after Jimmy’s death. What do you say to people you care about when something like this happens? Indeed, words failed me. As a psychologist for twenty-five years, I have counseled far too many people grieving the loss of someone they cherished, often from suicide. Words do often fail, but relationships don’t, and I have learned to be quiet, patient, and encouraging and help as I can as they struggle with the why of it all.

As Sally mentions in the book, she had two roads (at least two), one drawing near to God and the other away in hurt, anger, and disappointment. Indeed, disappointment with God, to quote an old Phillip Yancey book, is one of the major reasons often cited for those who leave the faith. Yet how can we go on living if we are alone, carrying our loss and hurt? Without simplistic answers, and so eloquently sharing her mother’s heart after her son’s death, I think this book can be a tremendous gift for those who are grieving, regardless of the nature of that grief. Only the great Comforter can best assist us when we are grieving, and Sally brings us close to Christ.

As it states in 2 Corinthians 1:3–4, Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God (NIV).

Frank Budd, PhD, ABPP

Licensed Psychologist

Director, Counseling and Substance Abuse Services

College of Charleston

Preface

Wednesday, July 22, 2009, is a date for our family like December 7, 1941, or September 11, 2001, is for our nation. It is a date when virtually everything changed. The loss and pain of that day does not heal; it never leaves our minds and is so beyond what we could have imagined or could prepare for that it daily challenges our very souls and existences.

The twenty-second of July 2009 was just three short weeks before my thirtieth wedding anniversary to my loving husband, Bob, and four short weeks before sweet Peter’s (our youngest) eighteenth birthday and the start of his senior year in high school. Our middle child, dear Sarah, was taking finals at the end of a full-load summer semester before her senior year in college. All of those markers became trivial when Officer Hope came to our door. Yes, God even reminded us that He was there with us in the police officer’s name. Officer Hope brought news that we had lost, to this life, our precious oldest son, Jimmy.

This sorrow and pain was and is unlike any other I have experienced. Pain and suffering are no strangers to me, but it is something I typically work out privately, by myself, with the Lord. At times, I have asked the Lord if the loss of Jimmy could be like many of my other losses—one for