Does God Want Me Dead?: A Biblical Perspective on Pain, Suffering, Disease, and Death

By D. Scott Bowling

This book is a result of the spiritual lessons I have learned upon being diagnosed with a slow, progressive, and terminal illness. Once I was told I had a life expectancy of less than five years, biblical truths that seemed to be hidden to me prior to my diagnosis now seemed to pour off of every page. I was an avid Bible student and teacher prior to my diagnosis, but following my dire prognosis, I began to have a greater appreciation for the pain, suffering, and death of so many of the men and women that share their stories within the cover of our Holy Bible. The title of this book, Does God Want Me Dead, came first. The title is not intended to be sacrilegious, but other phrases seem to come woefully short of the question pressing upon my heart. Slowly, over three years, each additional chapter would germinate in my mind and heart and develop over varying time periods. My goal is always to handle Gods Word accurately and honestly. I know I will stand before God in a relatively short period of time to answer for each word I have uttered and written. My objective is to disseminate the truths that I have learned, first to my family and friends that will be most affected by my departure, and then to all the saints of God willing to invest a few hours of their time for their edification and sanctification. May Gods glory be high and lifted up in all things.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Nov 30, 2015
• ISBN: 9781512720990

D. Scott Bowling

D. Scott Bowling lives in Southern Ohio with his wife, Donna, and their two sons Brandon and Jordan. Professionally, Scott started as a Medical Technologist, working at a local hospital before embarking upon law school. In 1997, Scott received a Juris Doctor Degree from Capitol Law School in Columbus, Ohio. Following law school, he practiced law for 10 years in Ironton, Ohio, before being appointed as a Judge in the Lawrence County Court of Common Pleas, by the Governor of Ohio. In 2010, Scott and Donna founded Jeremiah 38 Ministries, Inc. The ministry’s objectives are to come alongside and help foreign missionaries and foreign national pastors. Typically, Jeremiah 38 Ministries will organize and take short-term medical mission trips, working with these missionaries and pastors, in an effort to evangelize and provide basic health care in several developing countries. Scott and Donna have traveled on more than 15 short-term missionary journeys. The destinations include Honduras, Peru, Nicaragua, China, and Mexico, providing assistance and support to more than two-dozen missionaries and/or foreign national pastors. Also, Jeremiah 38 Ministries provides assistance to youth in Southern Ohio through various outreach and mentoring programs.

Book preview

DOES GOD

WANT ME DEAD?

A Biblical Perspective on Pain, Suffering,

Disease, and Death

D. Scott Bowling

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Copyright © 2015 D. Scott Bowling.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

Scripture taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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ISBN: 978-1-5127-2100-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2101-0 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2099-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2015919504

WestBow Press rev. date: 11/30/2015

Contents

Dedication

Preface

Epigraph

Acknowledgments

Forward

Editor’s note to Author

About the Author

Introduction

Chapter 1–An Open Door at 27,000 feet

I know thy works: behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it… Revelation 3:8

Chapter 2–Asking, Why?

O LORD, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear? Or cry to you Violence! and you will not save? Why do you make me see iniquity, and why do you idly look at wrong? Habakkuk 1:2-3b.

Chapter 3–Why do the wicked prosper?

Righteous are you, O LORD, when I complain to you; yet I would plead my case before you. Why does the way of the wicked prosper? Why do all who are treacherous thrive? Jeremiah 12:1

Chapter 4–Am I to blame?

When my life was fainting away, I remembered the LORD… Jonah 2:7

Chapter 5–Job, a Parent in Pain

Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. Job 1:20

Chapter 6–Letting Go

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21

Chapter 7–Learning a Lesson

My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves… Hebrews 12:5-6a

Chapter 8–Looking for the joy

Let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12: 1b-2.

Chapter 9–An Amazing Love Story

Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her. Hosea 2:14

Chapter 10–Understanding Scripture through Suffering

It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes. Psalms 119:71

Chapter 11–Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. Psalms 139:14

Chapter 12–Does God want me Dead? The answer…

For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. Second Corinthians 5:14-15

Chapter 13–Christ’s Great Prayer of Intercession

Father, I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to see my glory that you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world. John 17:24

Chapter 14–Summary of Lessons Learned (Hopefully!)

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man. Ecclesiastes 12:13 KJV

Chapter 15–Conclusion

If we have died with him, we will also live with him; if we endure, we will also reign with him. Second Timothy 2:11b-12.

Study Guide

TheBowlings.jpg

Scott and Donna Bowling, Oath of Office, January 2015

Dedication

I would like to dedicate this book to my wife, Donna, our sons, Brandon and Jordan, and to my parents. I know some of the information contained in this book can be very difficult to read. But my objective is simple, in that despite the calamities that may befall us, Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior is worthy of our Grandest Praise! May we use all of the challenges that lie before us as an opportunity to bring honor and glory to our King.

Preface

This book is a result of the spiritual lessons I have learned upon being diagnosed with a slow, progressive, and terminal illness. Once I was told I had a life expectancy of less than five years, biblical truths, that seem to be hidden from me prior to my diagnosis, seem to pour off of every page. I was an avid Bible student and teacher prior to my diagnosis, but following my dire prognosis, I begin to have a greater appreciation for the pain, suffering, and death of so many of the men and women that share their stories within the cover of our Holy Bible. The title of this book Does God want me Dead? came first. The title is not intended to be sacrilegious, but other phrases seem to come woefully short of the question pressing upon my heart. Slowly, over three years, each chapter would germinate in my mind and heart and develop over varying time periods. My goal is always to handle God’s Word accurately and honestly. I know I will stand before God, in a relatively short period of time, to answer for each word I have uttered and written. My objective is to disseminate the truths to which I have learned, first to my family and friends that will be most affected by my departure, and then to all the Saints of God willing to invest a few hours of their time for their edification and sanctification. May God’s Glory be High and Lifted Up in all things.

Epigraph

Trials teach us what we are; they dig up the soil, and let us see what we are made of. Charles Haddon Spurgeon, 1834-1892.

Acknowledgments

I would like to personally thank Pastor Lenny Campbell and my former Pastor Mark Fields. Both of these men have had a tremendous impact on my spiritual maturity and sanctification. Pastor Campbell has repeatedly demonstrated a love for his congregation that would rival the Apostle Paul’s dedication to his flock. Pastor Fields was my mentor for nearly a decade and helped me mature from a fledgling Christian into someone God could use for His Kingdom.

In addition to these men, the biblical doctrine contained herein is much a result of Pastor John MacArthur. Seldom will I embark upon a Bible study that I will not consult with Pastor MacArthur’s audio library. Pastor MacArthur has invested more than 42 years teaching through every book of the New Testament, in his methodical, expositional style. I would estimate I have listened to over 80% of Dr. MacArthur’s teaching in the last decade. Dr. MacArthur’s resources are invaluable to any Bible teacher.

Also, throughout the book you will see numerous citations and quotes from Pastor John Piper. Few Bible teachers can address the subjects of pain, suffering, and death with more elegance and tenderness. Although I have never personally met Pastors MacArthur and Piper, these men have had an extraordinary impact on my Christian walk and I am thankful for their unwavering example as Christian leaders.

Finally, I would like to thank mom, Talitha, Becky, Katie, Kirsten, Abby, Amy, and Sue for helping clean up the manuscript and their editorial insight.

Forward

I think the title of this book asks a very important question. This book causes me to consider biblical aspects of God’s nature that many of us may choose to ignore. Does God want me Dead? analyzes numerous biblical accounts and passages to help answer this question.

This book is the story of Scott Bowling’s heart and Jeremiah 38 Ministries, which is really one and the same. This ministry began in the heart of God and He brought it into the hands of mankind through Scott. It was written with the hopes of motivating Christians that are on the verge of stepping out in ministry for God, but cannot seem to find the strength and encouragement to do so.

Does God want me Dead? attempts to demonstrate the heights to which God will soar and the depths to which He will plunge to edify and sanctify His Saints. I feel that it will humble the exalted and raise up the down-trodden. If you are living life to its fullest, it will help you to rise to the occasion. If you are standing at deaths door, it will help you to see that there is a reason for all suffering and God is never any closer to His child than when they are suffering. If you are going to read just one book this year, read this one, it will change your life.

Pastor Lenny Campbell

Pastor of Oakland Chapel Church and Co-Director of Jeremiah 38 Ministries. Pastor Campbell has served in the ministry for more than 30 years.

Editor’s note to Author

Scott,

At 12 o’clock midnight, I finished your manuscript Does God Want Me Dead? It is now 12:30 a.m. and I know the answer; YES, God does want me dead. Most people cannot put suffering in the same category as mercy, goodness, and pleasure. It amazes me how you have used Scripture to do just that. Most people have a difficult time seeing God get glory from our suffering, to accomplish something far greater, but YOU see it; sharing that in these pages is inspiring to the reader. People who read this book and who face daunting challenges in this earthly life will be edified by the words in these pages. I see many people needing to soak up the words and Scripture you have explored. To have a zeal for death, and that it is viewed as gain, is certainly on a higher plain than most. I believe this book will allow us to see that God uses our tribulations, our sufferings, for something far greater. This is encouraging to me; light momentary afflictions are comforting to me and that we are renewed day by day is a source of joy.

What an accomplishment in writing this! You are an inspiration to all who know you.

....all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28).

Becky Bowling

Co-editor and sister-in-law to Scott and Donna

StricklandSwearingIn.jpg

Oath of Office, September 22, 2007, appearing from left to right: Governor Ted Strickland, Scott Bowling, Donna Bowling, Paul Fulks, Carol Bowling, and Charles Bowling. Photograph used with written permission.

About the Author

D. Scott Bowling lives in Southern Ohio with his wife, Donna, and their two sons Brandon and Jordan. Professionally, Scott started as a Medical Technologist, working at a local hospital before embarking upon law school. In 1997, Scott received a Juris Doctor Degree from Capitol Law School in Columbus, Ohio. Following law school, he practiced law for 10 years in Ironton, Ohio, before being appointed as a Judge in the Lawrence County Court of Common Pleas, by the Governor of Ohio. In 2010, Scott and Donna founded Jeremiah 38 Ministries, Inc. The ministry’s objectives are to come alongside and help foreign missionaries and foreign national pastors. Typically, Jeremiah 38 Ministries will organize and take short-term medical mission trips, working with these missionaries and pastors, in an effort to evangelize and provide basic health care in several developing countries. Scott and Donna have traveled on more than 15 short-term missionary journeys. The destinations include Honduras, Peru, Nicaragua, China, and Mexico, providing assistance and support to more than two-dozen missionaries and/or foreign national pastors. Also, Jeremiah 38 Ministries provides assistance to youth in Southern Ohio through various outreach and mentoring programs.

BibleWO.jpg

This Bible belonging to Clifford Bowling, author’s grandfather, used during Oath of Office ceremony in 2007.

Introduction

Therefore I endure everything for the sake of the elect, that they also may obtain the salvation that is in Christ Jesus with eternal glory. 2 Timothy 2: 10.

"Yesterday, Donna and I spent the day at the Cleveland Clinic. Since our first visit in December 2012, 885 days have passed. This essentially represents the half way point in the typical life expectancy of someone with ALS, being, 2-5 years from the date of the diagnosis. Initially, the physicians are very hesitant to tell patients which end of the range their disease is progressing. Now, after treating my condition for 2 1/2 years, the doctors are now more willing to discuss what to expect.

Yesterday, the physicians at Cleveland Clinic indicated it now appears I am halfway through the course of my disease. Wow, 885 days left!

And yet despite knowing the typical life expectancy of people with ALS and assuming the fact my progression seemed to be slower than most, having someone tell me I am halfway Home, still created a huge sense of disappointment.

I share this because I know most of the tone of my discussions probably seem grounded in a sense of hopelessness. At least hopelessness from the standpoint that my ALS will be cured or that a miracle drug will somehow be discovered in time to improve my ability to function or live to the ripe old age of 75. Hopefully, those who read this book will receive a sense of hope that a Christian has as we wait on our future glorification in heaven. As we wait to be ushered in to the very presence of our Savior and King, Jesus Christ. That is clearly the ultimate point of this book.

But, from the very first days that physicians began telling me I had ALS, I attempted to approach the disease with the realization that it would snuff out my life in a manner consistent with the 90 percentile that live two-five years with the disease. I have intentionally tried not to create any unreal expectations. I have never wanted to be someone that stands up and says, I am going to beat this thing! Especially, when a rational viewpoint would seem to indicate otherwise. I also realize and understand God is capable of working all kinds of miracles. Further, I realize I have been blessed with a relative slow form of ALS. I believe the slow progression of my disease is a direct result of hundreds of people praying for me every week all around the world. I believe that the ministry God had placed Donna and me into has resulted in making many, many