The Mechanics of the Soul: A Guide Book for Men & Women

By Kathy Wenzel and Rob Wenzel

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 20, 2019
• ISBN: 9781796078169

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Copyright © 2020 by Rob & Kathy Wenzel.

ISBN:       Softcover           978-1-7960-7802-2

                 eBook                 978-1-7960-7816-9

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 12/20/2019

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CONTENTS

1.     Life is Real

2.     Arrested Development

3.     One Foot Two Foot

4.     The Reverse Work Ethic

5.     The ABC ’s of Maturity

6.   The M Word The Truth about Masturbation

7.     The Cycle of Love

8.     Respect Honoring Boundaries

9.     Trust the core issue

10.   Intimacy In-to-me-see

11.   Optimism The Walk of Life

12.   Wrapping It Up

13.   Glossary

Life is Real

Many people throughout life ask the questions: How do we change our lives? How do we deal with all these challenges and disappointments time after time? How do we have good relationships? Is it even possible to be happy?

Many of us started off with great intentions, hoping, dreaming, and planning for some great things to occur in our lives. For some of us, not so much. Life is real and for many of us it slaps us right in the face. For Rob, "it was when I was 11 years old and I was hit with the reality that life sucks, things were not what they seemed and I shut down tighter than a clam with lockjaw.

I stopped talking. I couldn’t talk. I just watched and listened to what was going on around me. It was nerve racking cause I so much wanted to be a part of something, anything, but the fear of being discovered or found out was debilitating. I quickly learned to self-medicate to attempt to make it through…

Unknowingly, because of my self-medicating, I was arresting the development of my mid pre-frontal cortex, locking me into a state of emotional and mental retardation. I was an emotional idiot. Crap! I knew it and everyone could see it. So I drank more, smoked more and grew more dark, depressed, anxious and hopeless. Looking back I was actually committing slow suicide. I wished I was never born. I hated myself and hoped against hope it’d all end."

For Kathy it was a similar story Since my preteen years I was frustrated with life, fought with my mother constantly and had no goals or hope of accomplishing anything in life worthwhile. I grew up poor in a small town so I didn’t see much opportunity for a girl like me. Like Rob the reality that life sucked and things were not what they seemed, was becoming more real to me. I became depressed, hopeless and at times thoughts of God please let me die in my sleep frequently plagued my mind. I too began self-medicating, arresting the development of my mid pre-frontal cortex, locking me into a state of emotional and mental immaturity. In the next few years I somehow managed to survive falling down the side of a mountain, a roll over car accident and getting married to my 18 year old boyfriend when I was 16 years old. (No I was not pregnant, thankfully.) Yes, somehow I thought getting married and moving out of my parent’s house was going to improve my life. I was in for a shock! Life did not improve like I expected it to. Life got real. It was even harder as an adult with all the responsibilities and it really sucked at times, so I self-medicated more…

Fast forwarding 25 years… Between the two of us we have well over 45 years experience as professional counselors and over 20 years of higher education. We are far from perfect and have lived through some tough times. We both have been married a few times, have raised 5 children and in all these years we like to think we have learned a few things which we would like to pass onto you… because Life is Real and what a crazy ride it is! You’ll need to understand the mechanics of the soul to navigate more productively through it.

In our first book, The Art of Redirection, we did our best to share everything we could that we have taught for years in