No More Wounds—Only Love

By Amor Verdad

This is the inspiring story of Amor, a woman who despite growing up in an unstable home environment believing she was unworthy, unlovable and unwanted managed to survive her early home life, a move to Australia, her lack of education plus an unhappy marriage.

After the break-up of her marriage, Amor began to seriously look at her spirituality and was introduced to the amazing book A Course in Miracles. At first because of her limited education, Amor had difficulty reading the book; however, after asking the Holy Spirit to help her she persevered and today she has incorporated its principles into her life.

ACIM has taught me to look within for the answers for everything I need. I have learned to forgive myself, and to forgive others by focusing on love, and being honest with myself with everything that comes up in my mind. I believe everyone is a reflection of me, and treat them as I would like to be treated.

Amor was guided to write and share her own story with no expectations of outcomes. She trusts that this book will assist others in similar circumstances to discover their own true natures and realize it is never too late to choose No More Wounds - Only Love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press AU
• Release date: Jul 27, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504303460

Amor Verdad

Amor Verdad’s passion is to guide others to open to the Voice for God. In her groups and workshops, she shares her own dramatic story honestly and teaches that, by taking responsibility, we can learn how to forgive ourselves and others, resulting in the healing of both physical and mental wounds.

Book preview

No More Wounds – Only

Love

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Amor Verdad

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Copyright © 2016 Amor Verdad.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This story has been written to the best of the author’s knowledge. All events and experiences were written from the author’s perspective with no intent to harm or injure any person’s character.

Balboa Press

A Division of Hay House

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.balboapress.com.au

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5043-0345-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-0346-0 (e)

Balboa Press rev. date: 07/20/2016

Contents

Acknowledgements

Foreword

Preface

Introduction

Chapter 1. Old Cadiz

Chapter 2. New Cadiz

Chapter 3. Land of Hope

Chapter 4. Growing up fast!

Chapter 5. Life’s Lessons

Chapter 6. Homeland and Return

Chapter 7. Winds of Change

Chapter 8. Down, But Not Out

Chapter 9. End of a Dream

Chapter 10. Love and Peace

Epilogue

Acknowledgements

I wish to thank Holy Spirit for sustaining me through the writing of this book.

My love and appreciation go to my dear heart friend, Faith, who has been my ‘ghost writer’ for this book, and has been a wonderful travelling companion on this grand journey.

I also wish to thank my amazing friends Alicia and Faye for their friendship and for their editing skills.

My sincere thanks go to David Hoffmeister for granting me permission to include his inspiring quotes in this book. I have learned so much from this wonderful ‘A Course in Miracles’ teacher.

I wish to acknowledge my gratitude to my family in assisting me with my growth. They have all been fantastic teachers, and I extend my love to them all.

Finally, I extend my love and blessings to you, the reader. May you find some inspiration and answers within the pages of this book.

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The Opening

Foreword

Remember that no one is where he is by accident,

and chance plays no part in God’s plan

Manual for Teachers 9.1

It has been a great privilege to assist my dear friend with the writing of this, her life story.

I can remember the two of us sitting together on a park bench beside the Atlantic Ocean in Spain in the Spring of 2014. The sun was quite hot, however Amor was on a memory roll and my pen flew across the paper trying so hard to write everything down.

I met Amor at a local healing group shortly after her marriage separation. At that stage she was a very hurt and depressed woman. As time passed and she explored her spiritual journey, Amor began to blossom into the loving, compassionate woman she was meant to be. It has been such a delight to journey with her, and see her lovingly embrace the principles of the book, ‘A Course in Miracles ‘and other inspiring spiritual writings.

As described in her book Amor was given very little education, and as a consequence her reading and writing abilities were poor. When she started to read ACIM she met with a lot of difficulty, however she persevered and asked Spirit to help her understand the Course. Today her reading and comprehension has improved to such a degree that she has facilitated ACIM study groups, and guidance groups for young women.

Amor is one of the most honest people I have ever met. Her heart overflows with unconditional love which she shares with everyone she meets. I am honoured to call her my friend now and forever.

Faith Siorai

2016

Preface

Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.

Herein lies the peace of God

From A Course of Miracles Text Introduction

This is my story; however, I am no longer attached to the story. It is not real. It is a dream my ego mind made up to keep me imprisoned for over fifty years.

In 2010 when I encountered and began to study the inspiring book, ‘A Course in Miracles’ (ACIM) my life completely changed and I experienced inner healing.

ACIM is a three-volume, self-study, mind-training course designed for individual applications of its principles. It teaches that there are only two things in this world - love (Spirit) or fear (ego). These two aspects cannot co-exist. Everything we do or think comes from one or the other.

ACIM’s message is about love, truth, trust, forgiveness, and undoing every belief handed down to us through the generations. Every morning I place my trust and willingness in the hands of the Holy Spirit, the Voice for God, and here in this dream reality I allow Him to guide me throughout the day.

My studies have taught me that everything manifested in my life in this dream world, I have made by projecting my thoughts through the fearful egoic part of my mind instead of trusting the love of the spiritual mind.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned from the course is forgiveness. I came to realise that all my years of suffering originated from resentment and not being able to forgive. I recognised that I needed to forgive myself first so that I could move on to forgive others. As I studied the course, I slowly learned to trust in the Holy Spirit and began to undo all the beliefs I held about what others had done to me. As a result, my pain gradually disappeared, my energy levels increased and I felt lighter.

I believe I have forgiven everyone I encountered in my past; however, occasionally when I am sharing my story I can hear my voice change, and recognise that I have allowed ego in. I am grateful for these incidents as it teaches me that there is still more work to do.

Amor Verdad

2016

Introduction

At this point, the mind can begin to look with love

on its own creations because of their worthiness

T-2. V111.4.4

For many years I questioned where I belonged. I felt an alien in my adopted country, Australia, and also in my birth country, Spain. My family left Spain in late November 1962, just before my fourteenth birthday. Our parents told us we were going on a cruising holiday. It turned out to be a very long holiday!

In 2013 I visited my birthplace, Cadiz in the south of Spain, with my friend, Faith, for two weeks with the intent to finally put the past to rest. As it had done on previous visits, my home town tugged at my heart. I loved the life there. It was so different to the Australian lifestyle. I could see that the people still cared for each other and their families were important. Most people appeared to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. The local people have a saying, ‘We work to live, not live to work’, and this attitude filters through everything. Fortunately, materialism has not as yet taken over, although I did notice that smoking was rampant and mobile phones used everywhere. I met three of my cousins and one aunt who still live there. None of them speak English so I conversed with them in my rusty Spanish. One of my cousins told me I spoke childish Spanish. This is understandable as I was so young and immature when we left Spain.

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Cadiz

At the end of the two weeks I really did not want to leave. I arrived back in Australia even more torn and heartsick. As a result, over the next few months I manifested one illness after another.

I finally made the decision to return to Spain in February 2014 and live there for three months. This time, I told myself, I would definitely make a decision about where I wanted to live permanently.

Before I left for Spain I was guided to listen to Gary Renard’s audiobook, ‘Disappearance of the Universe’. I was particularly drawn to the story of the prodigal son and it made me think of my life with my parents, especially my mother.

There was never any love in our family and as a result my brothers and I have sought love in various places and with many people throughout our lives.

I was born in an old medieval town in Spain, in the latter days of November 1948 during the reign of General Franco. Although it was the time of Franco’s regime, we had a lot of freedom and as long as we were home by curfew there was no trouble.

My parents never wanted children. From a very young age I was the mother figure in our family.

When I was four my mother had a severe mental breakdown. Things were never the same after that. Our family became more and more dysfunctional as I was catapulted into becoming an instant mother to my younger brother, Rico, and later to my brother, Felipe, and to my mother as well. As a result of my mother’s mental problems and bi-polar tendencies, we all suffered physical and mental abuse for many years at her hands.

I am unable to remember much that was positive about my mother. Later in my life a counsellor told me to go home and dig into my memories to find something good about her. All I came up with was that she was very attractive with thick, dark, wavy hair. She always looked smartly dressed and was a good cook.

I thought when I escaped home at twenty to marry that would be the end of the abuse; however, although the physical abuse ceased for me, the mental abuse continued. This treatment led me to hate my mother so much that sometimes I actually wished she would die. My resentment towards my mother grew as I felt she had robbed me of my childhood and teenage years and was continuing to do so in my adulthood.

I lived with these feelings of anger and resentment until the age of fifty. I was then a mother myself and everything finally caught up with me. I became quite depressed and wanted to die. My self-esteem was extremely low; I did not love myself and I felt very insecure. Unfortunately, I believe I projected these negative feelings onto my three children. Eventually my body caved in and I became seriously ill with Bell’s Palsy and later septicaemia. My recovery was slow; however, it did offer me time to reflect on my life.

When my father passed away twelve years ago my mother had another breakdown, and I began to see her vulnerability and recognised that she was a scared child locked in a world of her own making. After my marriage of almost thirty-nine years ended, my mother in one of her lucid moments, actually told me for the first time in my life that she loved me and that I was a better mother than she had ever been.

After my separation, I began to look seriously at myself as a person and this is when I really started on my spiritual journey. Through my studies I found that gradually love, compassion and forgiveness were replacing the hatred I had hung onto for years. However, it wasn’t until I began to study ACIM, that I finally realised how my mother had allowed her illness to wreck her life, and how I in turn had allowed her to influence mine as well.

I am so grateful to have had a lot of substitute mothers in my life. In Spain there was my Aunt Luisa then our neighbour Jacinta. In Australia when I worked at a large department store there was a Scottish woman called Glynis who never got on with her own children. She took me under her wing and helped me a lot. After Glynis came my mother-in-law Meryl, once the barriers between us came down, and then finally a wonderful English woman named Maggie. My mother hated all these women with a vengeance simply because they liked and cared for me, something she was not capable of expressing.

My life experience has led me now to embrace every day with so much gratitude and love. I feel peaceful within myself and sincerely wish that all my family will one day also experience this love and peace in their lives.

ACIM has taught me to love everyone unconditionally, and to take responsibility for everything that happens to me. I have developed the art of detachment and now recognise that each person I meet is simply a reflection of me.

It has been my belief that I have been blamed for, and suffered both physical and mental abuse because of everything that went wrong in my life’s journey. I have now been taught to see this differently. My children used to complain that their lives were hard. They have no idea what hard really means!

CHAPTER ONE

Old Cadiz

I see only the past

Lesson 7 ACIM

My Medieval birth place in the region of Andalusia is situated on a small peninsula in the middle of a bay. The peculiar cup shape of the coastline, washed by the silvery water of the Atlantic Ocean has helped nickname it as ‘La tacita de plata’ or ‘The little silver cup’. The Moors who invaded Spain in the year 711 AD left their mark in the town as can be seen in the narrow lanes and mosaic works.

I arrived in Spain in February 2014 accompanied by my friend, Faith, with whom I planned to share an apartment for three months. We had timed our arrival for the celebration of Los Carnavale, one of the best-known carnivales in Spain. I had not seen one since I was a child and was looking forward to being part of the two-week festivities. One of my cousins had warned me