Grief with Ease: An Unplugged View, Beyond the Veil – Inside Afterlife Communication

By Mercy Montes

Grief with Ease Summary
By Anthony Vallez
My life was never an Easy Peasy cakewalk, in fact I encountered many hard times and went through countless phases and types of grief even though I did not recognize it at the time. Well, now I do and I want you to as well. Grief comes in many forms and various phases in your life. From grieving over a breakup to grieving the loss of a loved one, youve all been through it!
Personally I loved change, but when changes in life didnt meet with my expectations I fell into a form of grief that I did not yet recognize, nor did I understand. I thought I was depressed but actually I was experiencing grief. The two are easily misunderstood and often confused with one another. This book and the exercises in it are in tuned to help foster a deeper understanding and ability to recognize grief, in healthy ways to deal with it. From this book, my hope is that you to gain the ability to recognize various types of grief; how they impact your life, and how to cope with grief on a much gentler level. Grief requires the acceptance of change and the resistance of change only induces pain and suffering, when grief is chosen. If you allow change and chose to be happy, then you ultimately contribute to grief with ease. If you instead avoid grief, you then avoid life. You must understand your grief to understand yourselves and enjoy life. ~ Anthony I. Vallez

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: Dec 9, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504371025

Mercy Montes

Mercy Montes is a Retired Computer Engineer, Mosaic artist, Married 26 years with Three Sons, and Three Amazing Grandsons. Resides in Northern California

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Copyright © 2016 Mercy Montes.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Balboa Press

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5043-6990-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-6991-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-7102-5 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016920051

Balboa Press rev. date: 05/17/2017

Dedication

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To my son Anthony I. Vallez – Thank you son for saving me. Since your departure to your afterlife, you have taught me to live in the ‘Now’ and for this I will be eternally grateful – You promised me you would find a way to continue our connection beyond the veil, and ‘YOU Did’, you found a way and you made it happen…

I believe my Son; I believe, and I trust – Love will keep us together throughout Eternity***

Contents

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Book Dedication by Mercy Montes - (Anthony’s Mother)

Introduction by Anthony I. Vallez

Foreword by Kim Babcock - Anthony’s Spirit Translator

Introduction By Mercy Montes

Part 1: Death is A Miracle

1.     Our Embodiment with Empowerment

2.     I Believe What I Feel – My Transition

3.     Levitation Journey

4.     Life Celebration

Part 2: Death Can Be Your Friend

5.     The Universal Language is Love

6.     I’m Absolutely, Absolute!

7.     Deep Blinding Attachments

8.     Love Brings Hope

Part 3: I Can See Clearly Now – My Awakening

9.     We Are All One

10.   For a Positive Vibe – Neutralize

11.   To Make IT Through – You Need to Do

12.   Stop the Insanity

13.   Miracles Provide Comfort

14.   Everything Longing

15.   Take the High Road

16.   GOD! The Most Powerful Source of All!

Part 4: Trust Your Grief

17.   The Cloud of Grief

18.   Martyr = The Victim

19.   Cope, Don’t Be a Dope

20.   The Families Role in Suicides

21.   Avoid Grief - Avoid Life

22.   Self-Forgiveness

23.   How to Heal

Part 5: From Grief to Grace

24.   Grace Leads to Faith

25.   Grace is Born

26.   Grace is Universal

27.   Empathize Rather Than Sympathize

28.   Align with the Divine

29.   Honoring Your Grief

30.   Rebuke Your True Worth

31.   Belief and Trust Go Hand in Hand

32.   No Matter How Much You Loved Your Departed Loved One, the Grief is Similar

Part 6: Why You Fear Death

33.   Discover Your Personal Truth

34.   How to Be Authentic

35.   Accept Thy Self

36.   Why Me God?

37.   Bank on Trust

38.   Grief is the Other Side of Love

Part 7: Love is Eternal – No Beginning – No End

39.   What Your Loved Ones Want

40.   Forever with You

41.   Love Knows No Boundaries

42.   Infinite Nature

43.   Higher-Self and the Afterlife Herbal

44.   Stand by Me

Part 8: Messages from Your Loves One’s in the Afterlife

45.   Your Loss is Also Your Loved Ones Loss

46.   Your Mother Has Your Back

47.   Kisses on Your Face

48.   Bring Out Your Moxie

49.   Quit Mourning Already

50.   No More Tears

Part 9: Why You Are Here

51.   Centering Your Heart

52.   What Life Brings

53.   A New Normal

54.   Internal Shifts

55.   Positivity = Growth

56.   The Beginning Of A New Dawn – My Anniversary

Part 10: Prank Visits

57.   Talk, Speak, Communicate to your Dreams

58.   Stay on Your Toes

59.   Childlike Belief

60.   Awakening Your Inner Child

61.   Sharing is Caring

62.   Closing Thoughts

63.   Special Thanks To Literate Consultants

64.   Discussion and Reading Group Questions

65.   Notes

Anthony’s Introduction

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Hi, I’m Anthony. People say I died but I’m here to tell you, ‘I DID NOT DIE"! However, I did shed my body when I transitioned home. I am here to tell you – You do not die. Death is not an ending, it is a beginning. You may have heard or read somewhere that the soul survives death. Well, listen up folks because I’m here to tell you this is ‘TRUE’! I am here, there and everywhere in spirit.

My Mom will share more of my story, but I should share with you that I had a huge fear of death – Big Time!! My journey began when I was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes at the young age of 16. This initially hit me hard. I was shocked but as time went by, I ignored my medical condition. I ate what I wanted, then injected insulin to balance the sugar I ingested daily. What can I say, I loved sweets and junk food! I was someone who did not understand the completeness of my own value. I had a good life although my life lacked direction. I believed my path in life to be honest and free. I was never a wealthy person in life, but I always felt rich because of the abundance of love I constantly received from family and friends. I love people. I am what most people call a ‘people person’.

I especially love my family. I always loved interacting with people, even though oftentimes I didn’t know how to interact or what was expected of me. In retrospect, I failed to show enough appreciation for those in my life. You could say I spoke before thinking. I could be blunt, but not in a hurtful way. Due to my insecurities I made many mistakes, had some regrets, but I have since arrived at the understanding that we become the company we keep in life. In fact, you wouldn’t want to cross paths with some of the company I hung out with.

On a personal level the suffering I endured, especially at the end of my life was a result of my greatest fear – Death! The need to hang on to life. A lifetime of unfilled dreams and regret can defer one of the natural process of death. I shut down towards my end and could not talk about it due to this immense fear of death, I feel I wasted my last years of life. I could have lived those lost years to the fullest, but instead I chose to drown my being with such a fear of dying, that I lost myself in the misery of it all. Now, I can share with you and offer my assistance to the amazing facts I have since learned about the process of death and dying. I am not the same man since I crossed over. I will continue to shout out, ‘Guns a Blazing’, you were made for so much more in this world. I have since learned so much about whom I was and how I could have been so much more.

The moment that I crossed over was so Miraculous for me to discover the actual purity and depth of love and compassion. This feeling was so intense and solid. It was there upon my arrival. Unlike anything you could experience on Earth – Just waiting for me! That was so miraculous for me to discover because although I did believe in ‘GOD’, I was not sure if I believed 100% of an afterlife. Now, in spirit, my deepest desire is to aid humans in understanding that death is nothing to fear. Fear not Death, as ‘You Do Not Die’! Is there more to life? You Bet!! Please listen up and believe me when I say, you do not want to end your life on a sour note as I did. Please open your hearts, forgive self and completely embrace the concept of dying/transitioning. I certainly wish I had. It would have saved me and my family a lot of grief and sadness towards the end of my life on Earth. You can accomplish this yourself – Just BELEIVE!!!

I invite you to hang around because you are in for a wild ride into the ‘Great Beyond’. There are no words to describe the ‘Afterlife’, but I will do my best!!!

Your Sincere Spirit Friend – Anthony I. Vallez

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Mom and Her Three Sons

Foreword

By Kim Babcock (Anthony’s Spirit Translator)

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All my life I have been experiencing spirits from the other side but only in recent years, prior to the channeling of this book have I grown to understand the communication process. 2016 has been such an exciting year full of growth, especially working with Anthony, certainly contributed to my growth as a medium translator. I began working with Anthony around November 2015, when his mother, Mercy, booked a session with me.

Mercy’s son Anthony came through with a multiple of beautiful visions and information about his life in the afterlife. I soon realized this was the beginning of a lifelong friendship. Anthony’s mother asked me if we could set up multiple sessions to connect with her son, in the hopes of compiling this book, to help readers cope with grief and ‘Grief with Ease’ was born.

As my relationship with Anthony grew stronger over the weeks and months, Anthony began to show up in spirit in other areas of my life as well, to provide guidance and understanding, much like the purpose of this book. Anthony’s intention with this book is to help you to recognize possible burdens in your life that stem from grief and to also provide you with effective tools as well as insight to alleviate your grief.

The burden of grief can consume your every cell if you’re not careful. More often, it is human nature to avoid grief but in turn, you also avoid living life. Grief is conceived in your attachments to your expectations, born from life’s disappointments. Anthony teaches us that your loved ones on the other side hope for a life celebration after one transitions through physical death and spiritual rebirth. As I’ve channeled Anthony’s insight for this book, he has been instrumental in spotlighting coping strategies that require you to think outside the box, to step into a new territory, which fosters healing. Anthony also teaches us that through our personal perception, you embody the inner power to transform a difficult experience into a beautiful one, simply by shifting your perspective.

Enjoy this remarkable journey with Anthony, from the physical life into the afterlife, with higher perspectives to help cope with and understand your grief.

Blessings of Peace and Joy - Kim Babcock – Medium Translator

Introduction

By Mercy Montes – Anthony’s Mother

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To gather a complete understanding of the tragedy of my son’s death, I’d like to share how Anthony’s life began.

On a beautiful warm Indian summer day, September 10th, 1968, I gave life to a healthy, handsome baby boy. Anthony weighted in at 7 pounds and 7 ounces. My son arrived into this world one month late, yes, to be exact, 40 weeks plus three days, screaming and crying. He was upset to say the least. Could it be he had changed his mind about his birth, I thought? First time mothers can be so insecure, I certainly was! The moment the birthing nurse placed my son in my arms for the very first time, my son gazed directly into my eyes, I felt the most profound connection and love for this tiny being and instantly knew my son’s name would be ‘Anthony’.

The name Anthony means ‘Priceless’ or ‘Praiseworthy’ and so the praises promptly began. ‘Wow, I thought’, was I so right in selecting his name. As several delivery nurses began to clean him up, the praises were immediate. The nurses began to comment on how handsome he was, admiring the two deep dimples on each side of his rosy cheeks. Anthony then began to lovingly coo to the nurses as they placed him onto the changing table to put on his first diaper. The nurses were so enthralled and focused on how adorable my son was that they weren’t paying close enough attention as his little pecker gave way for the first time as he urinated directly onto the face of one of the nurses! No one got upset, instead we all began to laugh with delight. I truly believe this was the moment Anthony decided he loved woman, for in that instant, he must have felt he could do no wrong, that is as far as women were concerned! So, in late summer of 68, I felt this is when I officially became an adult.

I felt such ‘Wonderment’ of the miracle of my son’s birth. Previously, I had been terrified and concerned about countless things, such as, how was I going to have the ability to care for this tiny, innocent being when I couldn’t even cook a decent meal. However, all worries and insecurities vanished as I gazed into my son’s beautiful brown eyes. It was love at first sight! As my son made his noisy but sweet debut into this world, I became a woman. Prior to this day I considered myself grown-up and mature, but until I produced a human from my body, I had no idea what it meant to be an adult, let alone a mother. While I enjoyed the solace of alone time and becoming acquainted with my firstborn son, I began to realize the enormity of the situation. My entire world had changed and would never be the same again.

Anthony was a remarkably happy child. He and I were very close. It was a rare occasion when we were apart. Anthony was a bit shy when strangers approached but once he got to know them, he was sweet, loving and affectionate. Everyone who met Anthony loved him. His favorite game to play with mom was ‘Hide and Seek’, and goodness could that little boy hide! One of the best adventures we spent together was after I became separated from his father. I packed up our personal belongings and off we went to ‘Moss Landing State Beach’. Those were the days when you could live on the beach for months at a time without payment or fee’s. Due to my low budget, this fit the bill. I was raised by a very outdoorsy family whom especially loved camping, so along the way I had developed many survival skills. I immediately set up camp using one of my father’s old canvas tents, and together Anthony and I began our adventure. Anthony and I enjoyed our blissful life on the beach for three solid months. Oh! how we loved that freedom. We thrived with happiness and joy! I especially enjoyed teaching our beach neighbors how to prepare and cook tamales over a camp fire! Eventually, all great adventures must come to an end.

After we left our beach life, I worked at my marriage and gave birth to two additional beautiful sons. We became a family of five. All three sons were blessed with gorgeous, deep dimples. As the oldest son, Anthony became leader of the pack, but at times Anthony could be overly bossy and the younger brothers would rebel. My three sons loved wrestling with one another. On the weekends, the boys would rise and shine at dawn to watch cartons. I loved watching my boys get so giddy watching cartoons and acting out their favorite Looney-toon characters. On some weekends I would prepare a picnic, load up the boys and go exploring, we would spend an afternoon at our local library, or play miniature golf.

Unfortunately, my marriage still was not working so eventually my marriage came to an end. I will not sugar coat my struggles. As a single parent of three young boisterous boys, and without the support of their father, any attempt to remain financially afloat became my daily grind. Thankfully the balance of family, love and laughter kept us going strong. Life became us four against the world. I took on a position as little league baseball and tee ball coach for my three sons. Our circle of friends began to grow. God always provided as we continued to thrive. At times, I could be a strict mother. Since I had personally decided to end my marriage and become a single parent, it solely became my responsibility to ensure my sons grew up to be wonderful, responsible men. Anthony did not like rules. He especially disliked having to clean his room and make up his bed. I would arrive home from work and school exhausted from my day and the house would be in such a mess. I would sometimes cry from frustration and begin to clean, then prepare our dinner. My boys noticed my frustration and began to feel for me, they then banded together and formed a plan. One would be selected to be the ‘Watchman. The watchman would remain watchful for my arrival. Upon my arrival home, the watchman would yell out ‘Fast-man’. This would be the key word to activate their super powers as they raced to tidy up our home. We had such an amazing life. I loved being Mom to my three sons.

As my three sons grew, Anthony would no longer accept the house rules. He began to refuse to excuse himself from the dinner table after eating a meal. Instead, he would say, ‘I’m done’ and immediately run off to his room. After a time, he began to extend his absences by running to his father’s side of the family while continuing to fight for his freedom. Every time he would break a rule or get into a fight at school, he would repeatedly rebel and run from our home to his father’s side of the family. At the tender age of twelve, Anthony fought for his independence and eventually his stubbornness won out as he eventually chose to remain with his extended family. He loved living with them because there were no rules, nor were there any curfews set in place. They allowed him to do anything he wanted, including drinking alcohol. Regretfully, I eventually had no choice but to relinquish custody of my son to his grandparents.

Anthony is known to our immediate family as ‘The Prodigal Brother.’ His brother Paul presented him with this title and it fit him like a glove. He would visit us from time to time or we would visit him. There were even times when we would receive a call or a letter. I began to wonder if my son would ever grow up and become a responsible young man. Then one day my prayers were answered. Anthony’s brother Paul had his first child, a son and Anthony’s first nephew. Around this time, during a rare visit home, Anthony announced how proud he was to become an uncle. He thanked his brother for this new opportunity and then promised us he would never again disappear from our radar due to his significant obligation as an uncle. Anthony truly respected this responsibility and it subsequently changed him for the better. To our surprise and delight Anthony became a loving and responsible uncle to our first grandson, Aaron, they grew very close.

On November 24, 2014, our son Anthony I. Vallez lost his battle with life to a combination of juvenile diabetes, liver failure and heart disease. He was not alone. Upon hearing of our son’s impending transition, over 25 plus family members and friends dropped everything and rushed to our son’s hospital bedside. Smiley, as many people called him, transitioned to his afterlife with more love than most of us could ever imagine or be fortunate enough to experience. While we all circled around his hospital bed, we all held hands in a huge circle, as we sent Anthony home singing ‘Amazing Grace’ in unison. Anthony was, and continues to remain incredibly loved.

Our sons transition was beautiful and filled with endearment. How do you imagine your transition will be?

Mercy Montes

Death is A Miracle

The topic of death is a miracle that doesn’t have to be forbidden or avoided. I want people to see and embrace death for what it truly is. Why is the end of one’s life viewed as a failure to live? Death is a subject most of you avoid, especially when someone you love is approaching their last days on Earth. Why is the miracle of birth a common concept, but the miracle of death not? The truth is that in ‘Western Society’ you are taught not to discuss or focus on death. What a terrible mistake! When death arrives at your doorstep and you are unprepared these emotions can about destroy who you are and what you believe is real. I understand this firsthand because once I transitioned to my afterlife, I witnessed my families deep emotional pain and distress. Why are the topics of death and dying so difficult to discuss with your loved ones? Is it because people don’t want to face the inevitable due to fear? Well, I don’t want to be the spirit to tell you this but it’s a fact. You live, and you die!

Death is around you more than you care to realize although most humans flat out refuse to entertain any kind of conversation regarding this topic. You don’t want to hear about it and have countless excuses for not facing the fear which accompanies death. Honesty, during my life on Earth I would be the first to admit the topic of death and dying can be brutally painful and extremely difficult. Let’s not forget the sadness that you attach to this topic. I have already experienced it all! I am here to tell you it doesn’t need to be this way.

In the end, you all want the same thing, no judgement, just acceptance and celebration. When it comes down to it, the miracle of death is about liberation and rejoicing because you are going home and returning to your truer state of being.

Death is a miracle, this I know. I must boldly put that out there. I experienced my own death, so I know precisely what death is from the depth of my soul. Please allow me to share what to look forward to beyond the veil of the awesome and powerful Miracle of Death.

Only when you accept that one day you’ll die can you let go and make the best out of life. That’s the ‘Big Secret’. That’s the Miracle!!!

~Gabriel Ba

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Mom with Anthony at Eternal Bridge – My Ashes Final Resting Place

Our Embodiment with Empowerment

Let’s talk about the celebration of death, but death is not the correct word to use because you do not die, you transcend onto a different dimension where life is truly a celebration. It is so wonderful, you could never imagine; the knowledge, the beauty and especially the ‘Love’ that we immediately acquire on this side.

My personal death scene was a beautiful experience. Not only was this an amazing experience for my family and friends, it was also an amazing experience for me. To see and to feel the love and enjoyment. To celebrate my life gave me strength, as well as hope that things would be all right and even get better! I felt like being lifted-up on the wings of angels. This feeling empowered me, and I truly believe it empowered my family and friends. Oftentimes a death scene or transition is one that repeats on your Earth line repeatedly. When your time of passing over arrives, you know there will be sadness. You understand this but what you should also acknowledge is the elation and the pure happiness you will immediately feel in going home.

We here in our afterlife ask you to celebrate us. Your gift of love brings us such Joy. Love is what assist us onto a much gentler transition into our afterlives. Love helps us to feel safe and secure while we are amid our transition. This is our true birthday, so we ask you to celebrate us in that moment. This is our true birth day and is what truly means to ‘be born again’. Of course, we miss you and we also miss some of the Earthly pleasures, but this is truly home. We are not away from you, remember one day you will join us on this side, so take note of how my family celebrated my passing. I was extremely worried how my mother would react when the moment of my passing arrived.

‘He’s gone’ the nurse announced quietly. What? What did she just say? My mother is sitting next to my hospital bed, holding my hand. I heard my mother, but she is not speaking aloud, she is thinking this thought. I now suddenly have the realization that I can now hear my mother’s thoughts! Could we possibly be communicating through telepathy? My Mom is suddenly numb as she thinks to herself, the nurse must be mistaken. The nurse then repeats, ‘Your son has passed’. No, he did not! Don’t leave me Anthony, please don’t leave me, don’t leave me, don’t leave me, Please! This cannot be happening. It’s too soon. No, No, No, I can’t breathe. The worst possible tragedy of my life just occurred and all I can think is, ‘How can I continue living without my son Anthony? Mom then goes into a complete state of denial.

In this moment is was just mom and me. Why take my son God? ‘What have I done to deserve you taking my son before his time’? ‘Our children are not supposed to transition before their parents’. Mom jumps onto my hospital bed, throws her arms around me and begins to beg me not to leave her as her crying turns into howls. Suddenly, there is a mountain of arms embracing her. Mom continues to beg me not to leave her and continues to sob uncontrollably…..Please don’t leave me son. She begins to feel a deep panic engulfing her. Mom is now lying next to me, hugging me, holding me close. Mom is thinking to ‘herself, ‘this will be the last time I will hold my son in my arms, my baby, my first born. ‘Oh God-help me! Time passes. Only minutes have passed but it seems like hours.

My mother is in shock. She thinks she hears someone singing, she is becoming angry. How dare they sing, her first thought is to protect her son, she is thinking; ‘My son is transitioning, and someone is singing. This is insulting and so disrespectful’. Mom feels so weak, but she slowly lifts her head so that she can yell at the person who is so rudely singing. ‘You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are grey, you’ll never know son, how much I love you, please don’t take your sunshine away. That voice sounds familiar, but the voice is a bit hoarse, ‘It’s Me’ are her thoughts! Mom is singing…. the other night son, as I lay sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms, when I awoke son, I was mistaken, and I held my head and cried’.

Due to my failing health, my parents were fully aware that I would transition, eventually. My mother had been my care provider for the last four years of my life, but she was still not prepared. Each time she would have to call the paramedics to our home because I would be in medical distress, mom would always mentally brace herself with the fact that this time her son may not come home. Therefore, every time I would survive any medical emergency, Mom’s heart would sing with joy. My mother is now thinking, ‘I have no other choice but to face the fact this time around, my sweet son will not be coming home this time, I must be strong’ Anthony is depending on me to be strong. Mom is mentally trying hard to allow what is happening at this moment to resonate within her heart and within her soul. From time to time I would hear the word ‘surreal’ used but I never understood what this word