Spirited Me

By Lilah Baker

Boris could not resist anymore. He said, Enough already, then reached out and pulled Cecile into his arms. She held on to him, and he could feel her heart beating erratically in her chest, as was his. God, she felt good in his arms. He smiled down at her, ignoring her coworkers, whose mouths were gaped open in surprise.

Since the day she had told him about her tragedy, he realized how much he wanted to hold her in his arms and comfort her, how much she had come to mean to him.

The last time they had ran into each other in the hallway and he had stood towering over her and she had listened to him so intently, she seemed oblivious to all the others as they passed. He had leaned down so closely to her and he wanted to kiss her so badly it ached. He knew she had felt it too.

Cecile was shocked that he would be so bold! And she loved it. She felt bereft when the elevator opened and he released her. One of her male coworkers said, I believe that he just staked his clam, Cecile.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Dec 16, 2014
• ISBN: 9781496958655

Lilah Baker

I love writing and reading romance novels. I started writing at the age of thirteen. I am originally from Louisiana and love writing about the culture as well as others.

Book preview

1

I sat staring out of the window, in a daze, a wonderful aura surrounding me, work long forgotten. All I could think of was that I wanted it to happen again! Boris had totally surprised me when he had reached across, pulled me to him possessively, and gave me a big bear hug! In the elevator, with others watching. Glorious! I liked it, I liked it a lot! I wanted him to do it again and again….

Silly me, did I dare to think that he wanted me? A relationship with me? Companionship, even love? Whoa… but the thought was wonderful. I could claim it, couldn’t I? Was I ready to go the distance? I wanted to. I trusted God Almighty, not my flesh. My flesh wasn’t trustworthy, I had learned that lesson already. It had betrayed me more than once. I had been stumbling over my own feet.

My spirit woman had reacted to Boris. That’s what I had been waiting for, an acknowledgement from within my spirit for my next mate. My husband Hank had passed away 10 years ago this year and I was lonesome. My being’ cried out for real companionship, not fly by night affairs. I longed to be held in a loving someone’s arms, someone wanting me, needing me, as much as I them. No one way love affair, no more. A love ordained by God. I was ready to be happy, fulfilled, to live the kind of life God had intended.

Had Boris been making a statement? Was he waiting on something from me? I would have to pray, and continue to pray over this matter. If it was meant to be, it would be. Just like in the elevator. No games. Just being confident that whatever the case may be, it would be revealed. No need to fret. Now was the time to make some improvements in myself, working on things long put off. Things such as an exercise regimen, breaking bad habits, incorporate new ones, healthy ones. After all, I did want to be able to go the distance… Time to get that new wardrobe. Time for refreshing, restoring and renewing… As the old folks say, ‘a new lease on life’….

I felt like writing again! I had been so blocked up inside that I hadn’t felt free enough to get my thoughts and feelings down on paper. I felt released! Time to write that series of books -Lives Past and Present. Awesome! My God is an awesome God. I am thankful that even when I wanted to lie down and not get up, he wouldn’t let me, He comforted me.

Confirmation is awesome indeed. The dream I had Sunday night that left me feeling so good inside, was confirmed when Boris hugged me, I felt that same feeling, just a taste of it with promise of more to come. Nothing like confirmation in the spirit! It was time to separate the chaff from the wheat. Thank You, Thank You My Father. I feel like me again.

This past Sunday at church, my Pastor had talked about how when we pray, God dispatches our angels to do our bidding, but then they get held up in battle because of our wavering. I received confirmation in that message, stop doubting….believe, accept and expect to receive! My Manager walked up behind me and I was immediately jolted from my reverie. It was time to get back to work. Problem was, all my work was done. That’s what happens when you are so blessed. All of my accounts were up to date, training completed, meetings behind me, reports done. Since I came here seven years ago, I initially worked long hours – first one in the office and the last one out. I spent countless hours training and learning all about Logistics, Finance, Customer Service, Transportation Specialists, and Carriers. I redesigned and streamlined processes and timelines for statistical reporting and managed 100 Carrier Accounts.

I realized now that Corporate America was pretty much as the TV Shows depicted and I tried my best to remain a part of but separate from all the drama, deceitfulness, and questionable business practices. I had become known as the;

(1) one that gets things done, which wasn’t such a bad rep.

(2) no nonsense, all about business, no time for ‘networking’ unless required

(3) nice, but no pushover, aggressive when need be….

I liked learning, I liked a challenge. When I became bored, I would start looking for my next challenge, next project to work on. I had been a Business Analyst for the last 25 years. I have three children, four grandchildren and now was suffering from the ‘empty nest’ syndrome.

My husband of 25 years had passed at 54 years old! We had met when I was 25 and he was 29. He had passed only days before I was going to have my big 50 birthday party. I had been with him half my life!

Our children were now adults. My first born son had passed away two years ago at the age of 37 leaving two young children behind – ages 5 and 3. He had killed his wife before taking his own life. We, the survivors, were all slowly healing, getting better daily - in much prayer. Time was needed to rebuild all of our lives, the lives of the ones left behind, our loss was great indeed. Our love was arrested in time. How do you keep living the same as before when a person, a much loved person, is missing out of the equation? You can’t. Gradually you begin to stop expecting them to walk through the door, to be there on Holidays and Birthdays, to bring the kids over on weekends, to get a hug and a kiss. We cried every time we thought of how good and kind and loving he had been… We still missed him sorely. I had released my pain by giving it to God and trusting him and I continued to do so over and over every time the thought of it threatened to overwhelm me. My son had returned to His Father and he was at peace now. I had even written a poem about His Father receiving him.

The phone rang and I looked over to check the caller-id. It was one of the Carrier Accountants, I could guess what that call was about. ‘Hello, this is Cecile, how can I help you?’ ‘Hello Ms. Cecile, its Nicole. I could use your help. I was calling about remittance details for a payment we received. We still are not receiving this information.’ ‘Ok, I will be glad to provide that for you, but as we discussed before, if you would please send an email, with copy to our prospective managers, maybe we can avoid this repetition. I know how frustrating it is for you.’ ‘Alright Ms. Cecile, I will do that right now. I will be waiting for the remittance information as well. Thank you very much for your assistance.’

I turned my attention back to work, with a deep sigh. A sigh of longing, a longing to be loved. I downloaded the remittance information and forwarded it to Nicole. She was a very nice young lady who worked for one of our biggest Carriers. I got up to exit the office and go to the ladies room.

When I exited the door and turned left in the hallway, I bumped right into Boris getting off the elevator. His hand reached out and braced me. I could feel the energy radiating from him. He smiled, ‘We have to stop meeting like this.’ I smiled, ‘I’m sorry.’ He said, ‘You can make it up to me. Would you care to have a drink with me, this evening?’

I smiled, ‘Sure.’ He asked, ‘You riding with me or you will meet me?’ I said, ‘I will meet you.’ As soon as I said it I regretted that I had stalled on getting my car repaired. Now I would have to make my entrance with a missing passenger rear view mirror. Nonetheless, it was better to meet him. Rumors were already spreading that there was something between us. Was there? There surely was enough energy generated when we met to indicate such. Two of my friends had already suggested that ‘he is totally into you’. Well, at least now we would get a chance to meet outside the office and talk. His deep voice broke my train of thought. ‘Meet me at Barry’s down the street, unless you have another preference…’ I said, ‘Barry’s is fine.’ He asked, ‘What time do you get off work today?’ I said, ‘Four thirty.’ He said, ‘Ok, see you at four thirty, give or take a few minutes.’ He opened the door to his office and walked in, disappearing out of sight.

I turned down the hallway at full speed and escaped into the ladies room. My God, he had finally asked me out! I felt like I had been holding my breath for weeks now, thinking maybe that I had even imagined the impromptu hug in the elevator, except I had witnesses. So maybe he really was interested in me! The thought of it was exhilarating. I surely hoped so. As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I reminded myself that My Father had made me in His image. I would keep repeating it until those negative feelings would flee. Sometimes I could still hear the voices, ‘You are the darkest one in the family. You are black, you are ugly.’ I shrugged the thoughts away. Being depraved as a child of love was bad enough, to add insult to injury had driven me away from them. I had even tried running away several times, but found out soon enough, there was no place to go. So I settled for planning. I excelled in school, worked after school, saved my monies and when I finished school, I moved out into my own apartment with two other friends.

My God is such an awesome God! Now, I had to pray for strength to go the distance. Just being in Boris’ presence felt so good. This was outside the box for me. I always preached on staying within the racial lines, but it had recently been revealed to me that the only true lines, were the spiritual ones. Like Spirits came in all colors and sizes…. besides, it was exactly what I needed; to get outside the box, the invisible boundaries, the walls I hid behind.

I knew in my spirit, Boris was not one to take lightly, at least it wouldn’t be wise. I knew he wasn’t a man that I could control. Most importantly; he had