HUMANE NATURE
“Gentleness is disarming… So much more can be achieved with it.”
ADITI RAO HYDARI
Actor
On the Virtues of Gentleness
“I believe there is great strength in being gentle, and so much more can be achieved through a tender spirit. It’s a quality that is disarming…it makes the other person feel comfortable—not in a manipulative way, but in a way where they are seen as a human who deserves respect. I believe the root of gentleness lies in empathy—for another person’s journey, their mind, opinions, and experiences. It involves looking at things from different points of view. Gentleness and empathy also lie in the willingness to communicate… I think communication is the most underrated quality in the world…whether in relationships between countries, people, or professional teams.
While it is important to be kind in one’s tone and words, it isn’t always possible…or easy. I try to be mindful of the words I speak, but I don’t always pick them carefully. Sometimes, I’ll say things as they are, especially if something is not right, because I don’t like to pretend. And if I notice an injustice or oversight, I will certainly raise it, but always with the intention to work together and make things better. I believe that being honest with someone—even telling them that their work isn’t upto mark—can be an act of goodness. I like to be straightforward with the people I work with…we meet often, we do dinners together, and if there is an issue, I discuss it because it is so important to share what you feel. I may not always find the right words to say things, and I may not be able to deliver all my thoughts in a pleasing way, or even always have the patience that a situation might require, but I certainly try. It is important not to brush a problem under the carpet. Because it will fester if you don’t deal with it.
When it comes to living life in an authentic way, transparency can also be an act of kindness. I like to deal with situations in a gentle but upfront way by being more aware, empathetic, and acknowledging my role in a situation. If I lose my patience, I will address it and apologise. I don’t allow my ego to get involved in such matters. If I need to cry about something, I’ll cry. And if I need to go out of my way to make someone feel better, I will do that because it is very important to nurture one’s heart. We must be fearless, full of love, and honest in our communication because that is when we do our best work. When I
