From Broken to Blessed: An Attempt at Suicide that Ended with Blessings beyond My Dreams

By Jerome Petty

The problems of life, they can make you or break you, depending on your beliefs and perspectives. After setting myself up for failure and my world began to fall apart, I found myself sitting alone, humiliated, and broken beyond repair. There was no way of coming back from this, or was there?

I chose to end my life when I could not handle the consequences that came from my own actions. My mind was totally consumed with dark and painful thoughts that I could not let go of, but God, who is in control, decided, "No, Jerome, it's not your time. As a matter of fact, I have plans for you, things for you to see, places you are to go. No, my child, it's not your time." And with that, one chapter of my life came to a close and a new chapter began with God leading the way and blessing me beyond anything I could have imagined for myself.

This book was written while I was working abroad in Dhahran, Saudi Arabia, in one of the many countries that the Lord gave me the opportunity to visit and work in. This was a prime location for solitude with God, and I had a lot of free time to devote myself to the Lord in prayer, meditation, and fasting. I feel God led me to this location for a deeper relationship with him, and part of me feels he led me here to write this book. I'm one of the many people who looked at suicide as an option to dealing with the hardships of life. Had it not been for God's grace and mercy, I would not be here today, and I would not have experienced the beautiful life that the Lord had waiting for me on the other side of my problems.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jul 14, 2023
• ISBN: 9798888321850

Book preview

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From Broken to Blessed

An Attempt at Suicide that Ended with Blessings beyond My Dreams

Jerome Petty

ISBN 979-8-88832-184-3 (paperback)

ISBN 979-8-88832-185-0 (digital)

Copyright © 2023 by Jerome Petty

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Introduction

The Calling

Suicide

The Move

The Catapult

About the Author

I would like to dedicate this book, which is my story, my struggles, and my triumphs, to God Almighty. Thank you for ordering my steps and opening my mind to the truth. Thank you for choosing me for this journey, the good and the bad. Please continue to have your way with your servant. I pray that this book brings honor and glory to your name, in Jesus's name. You are the true author behind this story, which has a triumphant ending as long as I follow the script.

I would also like to dedicate this book to my mother. The hard work you did to raise us did not go unnoticed, and for the remainder of my life, I will be working hard to see to it that you will not need for anything!

Introduction

I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord: Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: Wait I say on the Lord.

—Psalm 27:13–14

There was no relief from the constant painful thoughts that replayed itself over and over again in my mind. After a year feeling this way, I decided that I have had enough. I could not endure it anymore. I was barely eating and would be lucky to get two hours of broken sleep for the night. For me, other than the painful thoughts, the lack of sleep really pushed me over the edge because my mind did not have any downtime.

I did not share my thoughts or feelings with anyone about the ugly mess of my marriage falling apart and not seeing my children on a regular basis. No, I just kept it all bottled up inside. I was filled with bitterness and pain—but mostly pain—so I had no interest in talking to anyone.

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but at the time, my mind could not see beyond the dark clouds and pain. I now know Satan wanted me to kill myself because he knew God had plans for me to touch many people through the reading of this book to lead them to Christ our Savior.

My attempt at suicide ended with my having severe stomach pain and a visit to the emergency room. I tried to fall asleep peacefully, but the way I see it now, the Lord was telling me, It's time for you to get off the bench and get in the game. So I ended up in the hospital, having my stomach pumped, feeling embarrassed and shameful.

I remember one of the nurses being pretty stern with me about attempting suicide. She did not know me, yet she showed concern in a tough love kind of way. I'm glad she was there because this was just what I needed at the time