38 Commandments for an Intimate Lasting Relationship

By Xlibris US

This book uncovers the hidden problems and misunderstandings, many times unspoken in relationships. In travel, it is better to follow a map so we reach our destination with ease. Without it, we can follow a compass or the sunlight. Without the suns light we have to guess our direction. Doing this is hit or miss. The same with relationships, we hope we are doing the right thing, just the same, it is hit or miss. With this book guiding couples, more likely if something goes wrong, they know what happened so next time couples will not make the same mistake/s.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 20, 2014
• ISBN: 9781499048872

Book preview

Copyright © 2014 by Fe Pardilla Griffin.

ISBN:   Softcover   978-1-4990-4888-9

             EBook       978-1-4990-4887-2

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Rev. date: 12/20/2014

Xlibris

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

Contents

Commandment I. Do Not Cheat

Commandment II. Do Not Lie

Commandment III. Do Not Steal

Commandment IV. Do Not Hide Anything

Commandment V. Do Not Control

Commandment VI. Do Not Decide By Yourself

Commandment VII. Always Ask Permission

Commandment VIII. Do Not Ignore or Leave Any Issue Unsettled

Commandment IX. Give Credit Where Credit Is Due

Commandment X. Do Not Hurt Your Partner Physically, Mentally or

Emotionally

Commandment XI. Do Your Share of Responsibilities in the Relationship

as a Partner in Life

Commandment XII. Practice Proper Hygiene

Commandment XIII. Always Look Your Best and Praise Your Partner for

Looking Good Also

Commandment XIV. Do Not Reject Your Partner in Many Ways

Especially Pertaining to Sex

Commandment XV. Do Not Say Anything Bad About Your Partner and

Family to Other People

Commandment XVI. Show Affection to Each Other by Hugging and

Kissing As Often As You Can, There Are Many

I Love You. Where It Came From

Commandment XVII. Do Not Allow Conflict to Get In

Commandment XVIII. Have Sex Regularly So You Don’t Lose It

Commandment XIX. Do Not Compete

Commandment XX. Do Not Envy

Commandment XXI. Do Not Compare

Commandment XXII. Share

Commandment XXIII. Do Not Count

Commandment XXIV. Do Not Blame

Commandment XXV. Refrain From Digging to the Unpleasant Past

Commandment XXVI. Apologize Only Once for a Mistake and Mean It the

First Time, And Not Repeat the Same Mistake Again

Commandment XXVII. Understand Hereditary Illnesses and Diseases

That Affects Your Spouse’s Behavior

Commandment XXVIII. Avoid the Nag

Commandment XXIX. Get Off to a Never Ending Discussion or Argument

Commandment XXX. Swallow Your Pride, Forgive and Forget

Commandment XXXI. Be There When Needed

Commandment XXXII. Give Time, Find Time

Commandment XXXIII. Appreciate Everything Your Spouse Does to You

Commandment XXXIV. Be Lenient to Misunderstandings. It Happens

All the Time

Commandment XXXV. Be Conscientious

Commandment XXXVI. Clearly Identify and Discuss About Boundaries.

Do Not Cross Them.

Commandment XXXVII. Respect Each Other’s Culture or Religion

Commandment XXXVIII. Make Life Interesting and Fun Always Enjoy Life.

Acknowledgment

I would like to thank Gloria for the patience in helping me out, making this book possible

THE 38 COMMANDMENTS FOR A LASTING RELATIONSHIP

These Commandments are written especially if you don’t have the nerve to tell your partner about a mistake or something in mind that bothers you. You can use these commandments to point out to your spouse rules do exist.

Everybody is different, some couples may tolerate selective commandments that may be repulsive to others. Compatibility is significant.

Compatible with hobbies like sports can make a difference to a couple. If you both play tennis, you play together, whereas if only one plays the game, the other go somewhere gets you separated. In some ways, it’s okay, but it’s better if you go to places together with the same interests.

Two liars will understand each other, but with two incompatible personalities cannot mix.

Stealing is wrong, but with the two thieves, can be a teamwork.

Mormons and Muslims take other women as part of their relationship as acceptable.

It is a good idea to go through all of these commandments one by one and identify which ones are more significant to your partner.

It is easier if you follow these commandments. Discuss them together with your spouse and see which commandments are tolerable to both of you.

Any one of these commandments taken for granted to its extreme can break up ties with your spouse.

A truly happy couple has a strong bond. Both of them will always want to be together, around friends and family members.

There are factors that people are forced to put up a relationship or sacrifice till the end due to the following:

1. One of the couple has no control over a situation.

2. If a man imported a poor woman (from any one of those poor countries) who cannot communicate in English and has no relatives in the country.

3. If a partner is completely dependent on the other. He/She puts up with the other for as long as the person is needed. People hook up with movie directors, actors, business owners, managers in big companies for connections until they are on their own two feet to leave once established.

4. Marrying an older man for money, once married, unless there is a prenuptial contract, when she gets the money she wants, mission accomplished, then she leaves. If the person remains dependent, then he/she will stick around putting up with the stigma attached to the relationship until the end.

5. Sex can be only a means to an end. A quick fix to an ongoing problem, whether it is emotional, financial or social status. These people who attach to elevate their social or financial status are called social climbers. Many times this relationship is complex and messy, may wind up in dangerous ending. When a marriage is a sacrifice, it is human nature to search for happiness, then adultery is almost inevitable as a consequence.

6. A homosexual marrying an opposite sex individual to please the family and the public is not true happiness.

Although there are exceptions to this rule. Example of this, is a homosexual man/woman whose best friend is an opposite sex. They get along so well, they marry.

All these are sacrifices pleasing the ignorant public and families.

Many single people rationalize being happy as single. Married people are happier.

Seek that person you are compatible with, there is joy in having someone, it may take time but don’t stop looking. There is always someone for everyone.

The worse that can happen to you is when you give up looking.

Commandment I.

Do Not Cheat

Refuse to be blind.

Cheaters to marriages are spontaneous decisions due to uncontrollable attraction and desire to an irresistible sexy body for sex. It’s the animal instinct of sexual maturity, ready to mate. In the wilderness, the loud sound of the mating call. When they do meet they are unstoppable. This is the blind love. Thinking nothing but indulging and consummating the strength of strong magnetic bodily attraction. As civilized people we are bound by morality, shame, values, norms, etc. But when sexual desire strikes, all those traditions may be lost. Attraction can be very strong that nothing else matter.

Attraction to someone else other than a spouse happens to everybody. It is the shame and morality issues that get in the way of starting an affair plus the fear to the spouse. This is an aspect of being human. When two eyes met and has that chemistry quickly at a glance, that glance is not enough, it has to be followed by a