Tonight I Die: A Journey From Death To Life

By J.W. Linder

Tonight I Die is the personal testimony of J.W. Linder. After an unexpected encounter with God, many of his biggest questions were answered. However, this encounter was followed by a series of radical events that ultimately brought him to his knees in total surrender to God. This is the story of how he was liberated from addiction, bond

• Language: English
• Publisher: Linder Companies
• Release date: Sep 7, 2021
• ISBN: 9780578969763

J.W. Linder

J.W. Linder is a husband, father and servant of the Lord. His vision is to see individuals equipped in their body, soul and spirit in order to accomplish their purpose. J.W. is a two-time combat veteran as an infantryman; as well as an entrepreneur, speaker, and songwriter. He has three degrees, including a Master's Degree in Nursing Leadership and Management. J.W. is the Founder of Cry of Dawn which encourages people to "Escape The Mundane & Achieve The Greater."

Book preview

Introduction

Where am I now? Where was I then? Where did my story originate? A lot of those questions will not be answered in detail here. What you will find is an amazing story of a crazy adventure mixed with pride and a lonely loner being aggressively pursued by a loving Father. This part of my story occurred over twenty-two years ago. I have come a long way since then. If someone were to look at my life today, they would have no way of knowing about my rebellious past. I have shared this story openly over kitchen tables and once or twice in a small church service but have never aggressively pursued telling my testimony until now.

My main goal in making this book available is to glorify God and praise Him for His goodness, faithfulness, patience with sinful man, and His great love for us despite our many flaws. I have been reluctant in the past to share a very checkered past. I step forward in boldness today to share my testimony with the hopes that you will soon be sharing yours also.

My second goal is to shout from the rooftops that God is real, God is good, and God wants you to know Him. I am a professional. I am a highly successful individual.

I have a very checkered past, but I am winning in life. You can win too. I am devoting my life to helping others win beyond their wildest dreams.

A God I did not believe in came to me in an undeniable way, gave me a simple, clear instruction, and I refused to listen. I finally listened after six more months of self-induced hell. Regardless of how long you have been suffering, you can begin the healing process now by finding a quiet place and stopping long enough to listen. Learning from mistakes is a key part of a successful life. I do not know about you, but I like to learn from others’ mistakes rather than my own. A lot of my pain was avoidable. I share my journey with the hopes that something can be gleaned from the story that will help you in your journey.

Angels Cry

I’m on the ground again

Far beyond the skies

I sin and

Angels cry

I used to be a young man

Life’s riches were my own

Found freedom behind sharp bars

Now I’m reaping all I’ve sown

I’m on the ground again

Far beyond the skies

I sin and

Angels cry

It seems I’ve come to treasure

These pain-filled screams within

My heart’s beggin’ me to fight

But my body wants the monkey to win

I’m on the ground again

Far beyond the skies

I sin and

Angels cry

This trashing sea is filled with hate

Here in all my dreams have died

Still God’s tears whisper hope

His love keeps me alive

Insight:

I have messed up again. My body is lying in the dust of life, but my mind is free and flying wildly into the unknown. Sharp bars are the needles and drugs that controlled my every waking moment. We often learn to love our pain. The pain makes a fleeting pleasure that is much more enjoyable and much more desirable. My lifestyle has killed every good thing in my life. I have no other desire other than more self-destruction. Somehow, I know that God is there and that He is asking me to call on Him.

CHAPTER 1

Locked In A Cage Of Needles And Grass

Dawn was still far away on an early morning on November 1, 1998. The smell of freshly cooked meth lingered in the air around the humble abode on main street USA.

Metallica’s For Whom The Bell Tolls roared through the otherwise silent neighborhood to offer an unholy welcome for a most awesome, most holy, and most unlikely visitor.

I was minding my own business, unapologetically disturbing the peace, smoking a joint, and rolling the last needle of meth between my skeleton-like fingers when the awesome presence of God Almighty rolled into my house.

It would be easy to try and discredit my experience and chalk it up to an active imagination. It would be easy to say, This guy was stoned, probably been up for days, and he was just tweaked out and seeing things that were not there. I’ll give you that, and I have argued with myself in the same manner. However, I can promise you that I had hundreds of deep hallucinatory experiences prior to this that have been thoroughly implanted in my mind, and this was nothing compared to anything I had ever known. This was not from