Built 2 Last

By Samuel Mearridy

This book is a symbol of reality, a gift of love, a representation of positivity, a guide towards mental stability, and a doorway to embracing your spirituality. It is my gift in this present moment to help us witness and understand what we may not have already seen. It's my definition of what it means to be Fit and to really understand the meaning of fitness. With zero judgments, let us find a way to create balance in our lives.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Samuel Mearridy
• Release date: Jun 21, 2021
• ISBN: 9781801282413

Book preview

Acknowledgments

I want to acknowledge my family and friends; I wouldn’t be the man I am today without them. I’ve learned so much from them, listening and watching as they shared their stories. Their stories are so unique that they will always have a place in my heart. I am a reflection of them, and I hope this book will let them reflect on me. When I say family and friends, I count you too. My friends are an extension of my family, and I would like to thank you for the love you have shown me throughout my life and for your belief that you have in me. I will always try to learn from my mistakes and be the man they believe me to be, so thank you.

About the Author

Samuel Mearridy is from the Deep South. He grew up in a small city outside of New Orleans, Louisiana, called Ponchatoula. Growing up in the South gave him a crash course in the hidden truth of America. If you are from the South, you will understand where he is coming from. That is not a smite towards anyone or where they come from, the South has a way of imprinting itself on your soul and never letting go. Samuel can see now and honestly say his life has been excellent. He believes he is blessed beyond anything he thought was possible. It would be no less than a lie if Samuel says he always knew he would write a book one day. His journey towards being an author began from penning down his thoughts through his life experiences, pain, people who ignited inspiration within him, his reality of being a black man, and how fitness helped him get through life. He aspires to make people and any situation he comes across better than before if his presence permits. Samuel believes his purpose is to uplift his people and others and know that they truly matter. He hopes his book is the light for people who are tired of being in the dark and afraid to let their light shine through.

Preface

This book is a symbol of reality, a gift of love, a representation of positivity, a guide towards mental stability, and a doorway to embracing your spirituality. It is my gift in this present moment to help us witness and understand what we may not have already seen. It’s my definition of what it means to be Fit and to really understand the meaning of fitness. With zero judgments, let us find a way to create balance in our lives.

-Samuel Mearridy

Contents

Dedication

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Preface

Chapter 1: Introduction

Chapter 2: Blinded

Chapter 3: Purpose

Chapter 4: No Way, but the Hard Way

Chapter 5: Consistent

Chapter 6: Fight the Fear

Chapter 7: Illusion of Inclusion

Chapter 8: Trade, Labels, and Titles

Chapter 9: The Fallacy of Overnight Success

Chapter 10: Love

Chapter 11: It’s More than Physical Fitness: Part 1

Chapter 12: It Is More than Physical Fitness: Part 2

Chapter 13: Wake Up!

Chapter 14: The Power of Gratitude and Giving

Chapter 15: Conclusion

Page Left Blank Intentionally

Chapter 1: Introduction

I am a personal trainer by choice because I love training people. I’ve learned a lot since I have joined this profession. Some trainers only focus on the physical aspects of an individual. That’s their way of working. For me, there is more that goes into the total aspects of being fit. I work on my clients’ individualities while also helping them to get in the best shape of their life.

I have spent several years of my life trying to figure out my true purpose. I would ask myself a lot of questions when I was a young boy; Why was I created? Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing? Am I wasting my life? Am I doing something that I wasn’t supposed to do at all? Is this how my life will be like? Is that what I will continue to do for the rest of my life? These questions would pop up in my head more often than I would care to admit. I wanted answers to all of them. Trust me when I say this, I have searched for the answers to my questions in every place that I could think of. I am curious like that, and I have always been that way. I am inquisitive, but towards my own self. I felt that there had to be more to me than me. I had this feeling that I was supposed to be doing more in my life than whatever I was doing at the time. I could be doing a lot more while making the most out of my abilities. There was this feeling of wasting my time on things that weren’t as important as I had made them out to be.

At the risk of sounding too dramatic, my life has been a roller coaster of emotions and experiences. I've been hurt and broken down by people who I trusted the most. I've loved madly, and given what I felt at the time was my all to all of my relationships, whether it was of a son, a brother, or a partner. By relationships, I don't just mean the romantic ones. This encompasses the bond that I have with my family members, my friends, and anyone who has ever known me. I've lost loved ones in ways that I had never imagined. They were taken away from me at stages of my life when I needed them the most. I've gained loved ones, people who became important to me more than I had ever imagined. I met them in the most unexpected of places. I've hit rock bottom so many times that I have stopped keeping count.

I had gotten it all wrong when I was certain it would work out, and things would fall into place. But then there were moments when I had gotten it right, when I had given up all hope. That’s the worst habit that one could have in their lives. I've lost faith, and I have failed myself because of it. I've lost my way and ended up suffering because of this habit of mine. I've been in pain, and I chose not to talk to anyone about it. I've listened to peoples’ opinions when it was the last thing I wanted to hear at the time. I've erected walls around me because I was afraid of getting hurt and being judged by people. I used those walls to shut everyone out in fear of getting my heartbroken. I've hidden behind excuses because I didn’t trust myself and the people in my life. I used to feel exposed and vulnerable for reasons that even I am unaware of to this very day.

I've lived for others when I should have been living for myself. I invested my time and energy in people who didn’t deserve an ounce of it. I've held on to ignorance because it seemed like the easy way out of things. I've held on to anger because I didn’t know how to process my shortcomings. I blamed people and my surroundings because I was too afraid to accept that it was all my doing at the end of the day. I knew I was responsible for the way my life had turned out to be. I just didn't want to say it out loud. I was scared to man up and take responsibility.

It may sound as if I am this incredibly flawed individual who hasn’t been able to do one right thing in their life. It is true, but I am more than that. The things that I have mentioned above are what I have felt about myself on an existential level, despite making something of myself. These were bumps that came along the way that ended up slowing me down.

Amidst all of that, I continued to make choices for myself that ended up giving me a sense of clarity. Every decision that I have made for myself has molded me into the man that I am today. I have grown up a lot in all these years, and I know I still have a lot of growing up to do. Maturity continued to knock on my door, and eventually, when the time was right, I answered it. I don't have anyone to blame for the way my life turned out to be but myself. But then, I don't have to thank anyone for my life but myself, too.

I know I am blessed with a lot, and I take none of it for granted. I am immensely thankful for it all. I'm at peace with every choice I've made for myself. I am content with the path that has been laid out for me. I will continue to have faith and keep moving forward for as long as I have to. You can never know when it’s your time to be happy and get what you want because there’s no way to be sure of that. All you can do is believe that your time is coming. You need to feel it in your bones that something amazing is going to happen for you. All you can do is give it all you have got and hope for the best outcome. If it happens for you, then it was definitely meant to be. If it doesn't, don't be disheartened. Just know that it wasn't your time yet. Good things will happen for you in due time.

Your thoughts and your ability to feel are what make you human. You are allowed to feel sad when things don’t work out the way you had hoped they would. It’s normal to feel sad and broken. There’s a difference between feeling broken and breaking down from within. The latter happens when you give up and stop believing in yourself.

Remember that God doesn't put you in a situation that He knows you won’t be able to handle. Never stop working on yourself, because ‘YOU’ are all you've got. Strive to become the best version of yourself and watch how it changes your life — practice self-love. Never stop loving yourself because, in the end, only you can take care of yourself in the best way possible. Be willing to do everything for what you believe in, even if it means making the ultimate sacrifice of your life.

After going through all of that and braving the worst storms of my life, I finally know my purpose. Every single day, people who need my help are put in front of me. Seeing them and helping them in taking on their journey of self-love is immensely rewarding. I finally know what I'm supposed to do with my life. I know that my ultimate purpose is to help all those people and try to make their lives a little better.

I love what I do. Getting up every morning and doing what I am passionate about is one of the best feelings in the world. I know I might sound like a narcissist, but I love the man I'm becoming. I love it because I end up bringing out the best in people. I'm truly grateful for everyone who’s with me today and all those who were a part of my life in the past. They left an indelible impact on me. I learned from every single one of them and applied those learnings to my life.

Knowing your purpose is the first step to living a fulfilled life. You need to keep searching for it, and the day you find it, that’s the day when your life really begins. After you have found your purpose, then comes the most challenging part. You need to learn everything you can about it. Mastering your purpose is a gift is what it’s all about. It’s a gift that you shouldn’t keep for yourself. You are supposed to help people who are stuck in the monotony of their lives just like you. They are confused about where to go from that point on. You shouldn’t hold on to your gift selfishly. You should pass it forward to make other people’s lives better.

Let it be known that knowing your purpose doesn't mean you'll suddenly have answers to all the questions, or your problems will be solved with a snap of your fingers. It doesn’t mean that you're holier than thou. You will still have to fight and struggle along the way. You will face more challenges than you have done before. You just have to believe in yourself. You have to know that everybody who was with you at the beginning won't be there with you until the end. Some will move forward in life, while many will fall behind according to their convenience. There are people who will abandon you when you need them the most.

You have to understand and believe that you matter. You need to know that your dreams and feelings are valid. They will continue to be that way as long as you continue to believe in them. If you don't, no one else will. Don’t expect anyone else to see something special in you when you can’t do that for yourself. There’s no reason why people will put their faith and trust in you when they will see that you aren’t sure of yourself.

I'm just getting started, and I am excited for the rest of my journey. It’s a feeling that I will never be able to put into words. I have so much more to learn and give to all those who are going through something similar as I did. Now that I know my purpose, I can feel the positivity and energy running through my veins. I wake up every day with nothing but gratitude. I look forward to a new day so that I can make the best of it. This is how our lives should be like. Stop merely existing and start living your life the way it’s meant to be lived. Get ready to experience the gift of knowing your purpose.

This is the sole reason why I am writing this book. I have been through all of these hurdles, only to realize I was on the path to becoming the master of my purpose. I realized that I was created to help people and pull them out of their misery. While I was able to find the strength to face my fears and insecurities, not everyone is strong enough to do that. There are people who feel lost and abandoned. They are devoid of any purpose in their lives. They watch as their days pass by, and they are unable to achieve anything because they don't know how to do that. There’s no one to encourage them to move forward. These people lack the awareness and determination that is required to accomplish something. It’s either because they don’t have the resources or the correct guidance to do what’s best for them.

I was once like that too. I was someone who fell down after every step he took forward. If I can change my life, I know others can do that too. There’s no reason why anyone should live a life in which you don’t have anything to achieve for yourself. That’s the entire purpose of this book. I want to help people in finding the courage and the strength that it takes to change their lives. We don't get it, but it’s all inside of us. That's where the answers lie to our problems. They are within you just like mine were within me. You just have to look for it within you and only stop once you have found it.

Through this book, I want to tell people that it is okay to break down at the end of the day when your adversities get to you. It is normal to feel like nothing is working out for you, and you're wasting your life by doing nothing. It is normal to think that you are alone in your struggles, and there's no one that can help you out. I am here to tell you that all of it is true. You're the only one who’s going to stick with you at the end of the day.

Have you heard that really famous saying, Don't depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you in the dark? Yes, that's the harsh reality of life. People leave, and you can't stop them. But you can trust and rely on yourself because no one knows ourselves better than we do. When you depend on yourself, you realize all the strength, courage, and determination that you needed was within you all this time. All you have to do is not give up on yourself. Among all the other things, this is the sole purpose of writing this book. I hope that by the end of it, I will be able to fulfill the purpose. This book is about the experiences that I have had and what I have learned from them. It's about how I see everything that is around me. It's my opinion towards different situations that could occur in our everyday lives.

My name is Samuel Mearridy, and this is the story of my life. I wanted to be a professional athlete when I was young, but that never happened. I joined the military at a young age. I, along with 3 of my friends went to sign up for the military program. I was the only one who signed up even though I wanted my friends to sign up too, but they didn’t. I got in and joined the army. I served in the army for a few years. After being done with the military, I enrolled in a college with hopes and ambitions to play collegiate football. After a spring game, a teammate and I were helping each other to get better in the game. That’s when I sustained a knee injury.

The injury turned out to be severe, and I had to undergo knee surgery. After that, I didn’t continue to pursue playing football anymore. I was 23, and I was already walking around with a knee injury. This was why I stopped playing altogether. Quitting the sport was one of the hardest decisions that I have taken for myself. But I did because it was the right thing to do. I made peace with myself by thinking that maybe it wasn’t meant to be for me.

After my injury and recovery, I dropped out of college. Wanting to play football was the only reason I had joined the college in the first place. Once that wasn’t there in my life anymore, there was no point in staying there. I turned towards doing manual labor jobs.

During the time when I was doing these jobs, I had also taken an interest in becoming a personal trainer. I had always been a fitness enthusiast, so I thought it would be fun to do that. As I got into it, I found out I was good at it. This was why I decided to take it from a hobby and turn it into a part-time profession. That's when I decided to become a personal trainer. I started training while doing all those jobs on the side. I enjoyed everything about it. The entire process was enjoyable for me. I liked personal training because it kept me around fitness. As much as I enjoyed it, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to make it a full-time job. Nonetheless, I continued doing it and kept improving myself.

There were a couple of deaths in my family. I lost people that I loved one after the other in a short span of time. Everything that happened had left me angry and distraught. I didn’t want to answer anyone else because I had suddenly lost the energy to do that. I needed an outlet through which I could let it all out of my system. I quit all of my other manual jobs and decided to become a full-time personal trainer.

I officially started working as a personal trainer and fitness instructor. As I mentioned before, I was passionate about fitness, which was why I didn't have any difficulties in switching my career. Initially, I wanted to see if I would be any good at it and if I had the stamina to do it. Once I was confident about my choice andcertain that I wanted to do it for the rest of my life, it proved to be the most difficult and yet the most satisfying decision I have ever taken for myself. It tested me beyond anything that I had imagined up to that point. And yet, I wouldn’t have it any other way. If I got a chance, I would do it all over again.

Through personal training and working with people on a one on one basis, I ended up learning a lot about physical fitness and training. I wanted to know everything that there was about it so that I could do my job more efficiently. This way, I could help my clients and the people that I worked with in a much better way. I continued to educate myself in every way I can to become the best personal trainer that I could be.

The inspiration for this book came from my passion for fitness training and my purpose of helping people. I realized that if I brought the two of them together, I could accomplish much more in my life. That’s what I did. I acquired a lot of knowledge along the way, which was why I wanted to spread it to others as well. I wanted to be able to touch the lives of as many people as I could, and I knew there was no other way to do that than the written word. One day, I sat in front of my laptop and began writing. I realized it gave me the same kind of happiness that training did. I felt invigorated after writing about my experiences the same way after a long day of training at the gym. It is safe to say that it was the best decision that I have made so far.

Through this book, I want people to look at the bigger picture. I want them to stop worrying about the future and take notice of what they have today. They shouldn't bother themselves by thinking about what's going to happen tomorrow, the next week, the next month, or the next year. Stay present in the moment you are in. Stay focused on what you have and who you are at the moment. Learn to love your present status in life and the way you are at that point. Learn to stay consistent and work towards making every second of your life better than the previous one. Your past has prepared you for what you are and where you are at this point in your life. Have faith that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.

Through this book, I want to give people the courage to continue to work on the little aspects and areas in their lives. We want everything to happen right away. We lack patience and end up forgetting that patience is a virtue. It's the small things in life that make it worth living. Notice that when you’re living your best life and not merely watching your days pass by, you learn to appreciate everything that happens on a given day. This includes the good, the bad, and the greatest. Blessings come in all shapes and forms; there’s no denying that. You just have to keep looking out for it. Adapt the concept of one day at a time. Prepare yourself for what's to come, and be ready for it whenever it happens. Small daily improvements always lead to exceptional results over time.

Chapter 2: Blinded

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

-Aristotle

You must be wondering what does the word 'blinded' mean and what does it have to do with what we are talking about. I chose to call this Chapter ‘blinded’ because nine out of ten times, we are blinded by pain that we are unaware of. We aren't sure if agony and discomfort of that kind could exist in the first place. What makes it worse is we have no idea how to make the pain go away.

As a personal trainer, I have witnessed this on several occasions when people are blinded by perceptions of the world. In certain instances, they are blinded by their own beliefs. For instance, women who lifted weights weren’t considered to be feminine. People believed that this way, they lost all of their femininity. Women who trained and lifted weights weren’t considered to be desirable by men. No one wanted to be with women like that. They were ridiculed for their choices and their lifestyle. In the older days, a woman’s job was to look pretty and presentable for the men in their lives or for the men around them who were potential suitors for them. Any woman who didn’t do that and chose to lift weights didn’t have the physical beauty and the qualities to woo men. If women were to state examples of other women who had weight trained before them, they were laughed off for being too masculine.

This has been a practice in the past that fitness was presented to men and women by traditional gyms as a barometer of looking better than others. The idea of it was sold to them as a ticket to look a