Birthmark My Story

By Cleola Govender

A birthmark is a physical artwork that is found on many, but the psychological making of a scar serves the same purpose, of reminding one who one truly is. When the author first decided to write a book, she thought it would be a vessel that allowed her emotions, anger and pain to be released. However, it became more than a story, it became a testimony.

In this book you will find her growth as a person and the scenarios that made her who she is today. The author tries to captivate her audience with her raw emotions. Revisiting many situations was hard, even if they happened ten years ago. Facing one’s pain is dangerous because it may make one bitter, or sweet, but the process of healing will make one brand new.

To the parents reading this book, in each page the author highlights many situations that a child may go through but is afraid to open up about. This book should be used as a conversation starter to any issues that the youth face today.

To the youth that are reading this book, learn wisely and create your own story that is filled with the glory of your potential. The author hopes this book will ignite your dreams and passions.

Writing this book has been one of the beautiful processes in the author’s life, and having her story told is her form of saying goodbye to her birthmark, and hello to a new canvas.

Remember that extraordinary people are humans who dare to make their own extra attributes. Make your mark and paint your world.

Never give up.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Cleola Govender
• Release date: Feb 4, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005410100

Book preview

Author’s Note

I was nine when I wrote my first story; it involved three beautiful fairies and it ignited a passion that would follow me throughout my life. Telling stories and writing down my emotions became more than a school assignment, it became my talent. However, while in my stories I was bold, in real life I felt broken. I was bullied for most of my life and never seemed to find my place in this world; I went through my days with uncertainty, and lost myself in the process. Writing a book was always a part of my life plan, but the hustle of my routine pushed this dream further from me. On the seventh of June 2020, I wrote my first page, and while the world became engulfed with disbelief, my mind adjusted to its power mode, and I knew that this dream would become a reality.

Your purpose will be fulfilled: it may not be according to your timing, but it will be at the right moment. The world, life, and love are all complex in numerous ways, but we as humans share similar adversities throughout our lives. The journey that we go through is fragile, but strong enough to handle missiles of bullying, hate, and pain. It is not going to be easy, and sometimes you might want to break down. In those moments, I urge you to be bound by strength.

Thank you for reading my story - may you find encouragement and inspiration within it. A birthmark is unique in all its glory. Use your imperfections as your unique birthmark, which is beautiful from every angle, even if you fail to see it.

Table of Contents

Author’s Note

1.Early Days

2.Birthmark

3.High School

4.Millennial

5.Life

6.Love

7.Happiness

8.Family

9.Fitting In

10.For a Reason

11.Limitless

12.Mindset

13.Forgiveness

14.Comfort Zone

15.Living in a Pandemic

16.Humility

17.Success

18.Dreams

19.Never Give Up

20.Future

21.The Last Chapter

Walk Away

Early Days

School? Many of us faced several problems at school, from petty fights to tears, and the classic of complaining to the teacher about a friend’s evil deed. The quirks that make school what it is result in the best memories over time. For me, school memories are not my first thought when going down my long list of throwbacks. I was eight when I first got bullied, and the scars that it left were so much more painful than any real wounds. I thought about my experience for so many years, thinking about where I went wrong, and well, why did I have to face this challenge?

I had no friends for most of my early life; I would say that was the hardest challenge I faced thus far, and coming to terms with my situation was a battlefield. Having no friends is not easy, especially when you are in an on and off relationship with loneliness. I always wondered about why I did not fit in, and it altered my perception of people, and brought into my life significant social anxiety. I tread carefully when meeting new people because being disliked became my fear factor, and I could not escape it. I remember feeling claustrophobic even in the smallest of crowds. When I was young, I watched others laugh at me, and they did not fail to mention that they would never be my friend. It is a tough situation to face when friendship is a social need. I never thought that being the odd one out would be so hard to comprehend, and the worst part was that I ended up getting used to it.

A teacher once told me that maybe I had no friends because I expected too much from others. I was honestly shocked; a child wanting friends was not an unattainable request. I built a wall around myself and never let anyone in; I sat alone and spent many days in the library. Being bullied was like being in a boxing match and getting knocked down every round: emotionally I was broken, but my family always kept me going. I would wait for it to rain so that I could stay inside the classroom at break time, and I would volunteer to make banners for every school event so that I would not have to be alone during break.

I guess my experience taught me to be kind always, so that I could somehow prevent another person from feeling the negative emotions that I felt. To those who are getting bullied or have no friends and are wondering why you are going through this, remember - rain must fall for flowers to grow. Giving up is easy, but it is not fulfilling and will not benefit your life in any way; we are all born with a purpose. As much as my experience hurt and took away many years of happiness, I never gave up because I believed that tomorrow would be better. I held so much anger and resentment towards those who bullied me, those who saw me as the friendless girl, and even towards the teachers who chose not to see my potential because I was unpopular. In the end, all this did was make me angrier. In reality, none of them were even thinking about me; the problem was nothing but my own destructive thoughts. When you let this go, you get the best feelings of euphoria, and it does set you free.

Bullying is a serious issue - it has the power to break you down, and paralyses you from feeling joy in your life. The fear I had of being bullied after my years of going through it might have been erasable, but I began to pressure myself to meet the expectations of those around me so that I could feel wanted. What most people do not realise is that bullying is a crime: you cannot just hurt people emotionally with malicious intent. There are becoming too many cases of mistreatment, and this needs to be stopped. I long for a world where the youth of today, tomorrow, and all the generations to follow will embrace each other’s differences, love each other’s weaknesses, and stand together, instead of being divided. My early days were filled will negative emotions, and I cried until I had no tears left, and became numb. My parents went through their string of emotions too - my mum wept at hearing the endless stories of my troubles, while my dad concentrated on making me feel secure each day.

In many ways I let the bullies take over my life, and I regret this now, and wish I could change it. You should never let anyone have such influence over you; you are in charge and have the power within you. I constantly replayed moments of pain in my head, which resulted in a bitter mindset. If you are being bullied or have gone through similar emotions, remember that you are never alone: you are a part of a particular group that holds more than potential, we hold the courage to face more than we are made to.

As I’ve said, I was eight when I first got bullied. The years flew by, and before I knew it, I was thirteen. My Grade Seven year

Reviews for Birthmark My Story

[selene reddy · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Well done cleola. I wish you great success and prosperity. All the best