Prison Blood of a White Fraud

By Isaac Brown

Eric is a retired white gay man, partnered to Harry. Eric has always had a yearning to be a black man and while surfing the Internet, finds an article that shows how a young white man took tablets to turn his skin black. This intrigues him and he searches for more information. His search discovers a medium that allows him to inject a substance into his body that will turn his skin darker and tablets that will enhance the injections so he can retain the darker color. He decided to try as an experiment and orders the injections and tablets. His partner Harry is not happy with his decision and an argument ensues.
"I did not marry a black man." Harry argues.
"My skin might turn darker but I am the same inside; I am still the same man you married?" Eric answers.
"No you are not; you are black and I married a white man." Harry pleads with him.
"I need to do this Harry; I don't know why but I just need to do this. I need to know what it feels like to be black?"
"Then you do it alone; get out of my house and don't come back until you come to your senses." Harry shouts.
Eric leaves the room and goes and packs a small bag and walks out of the house; he is now homeless and a black man. Can he survive as a black homeless man?

Eric meets up with another black homeless man named Beauregard Marmaduke Washington or Beau for short. Beau understands his feelings and encourages him to continue the injections and tablets but suggests he meet a local community doctor; known for his herbal remedies; the local 'Witch Doctor'. The 'Doc' agrees to help but there is a price, there is always a price, and Eric finds himself given tablets that turn his skin almost a dark 'Negro' colour and suddenly finds himself waking up in a strange place. He has been drugged and his mind altered to that of a Negro drug dealer and is soon captured by police and incarcerated for violating parole; the 'Doc' has given him the face and description of an escaped prisoner from Georgia State Prison and he is sent from Chicago where he is arrested and sent back to Georgia State Prison where he supposedly escaped and was the leader of the Black Prisoners and head of the drug distribution in the prison.

The story expands on his being black, his incarceration and eventual release and setting up of a drug distribution outside of prison in the lower suburbs of Chicago and how he is manipulated by 'The Doc'. His nature is altered to that of a vicious underworld leader and killer. Eric goes through several identity changes and names through interference from 'The Doc' but never once decided to return to his old self; he liked being black.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Isaac Brown
• Release date: Mar 7, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005735555

Isaac Brown

Isaac Luther Brown is a first time author; finding writing as a hobby in his later years after he retired from prison life at the age of 72 years. He spent most of his adult life in prison; mostly for non violent crimes. Isaac is of mixed race of Spanish, Southern French and Moorish (North African) blood. Writing had always been a passion for him in the solitary times when spent alone but it was only after his release from prison that he took it up as an author. Isaac is a gay man but not partnered at present although he still wishes to find someone to share his life in the future. Isaac now lives in the Far North of Queensland in the tropical northern city of Cairns with his devoted cat ‘Tiger’; a black and white mixed breed he rescued from a shelter. It was an older cat and he said he felt a kinship to the cat being black, older and in a cage as he had been. Isaac knew he was a gay man before he was incarcerated and although was raped many times inside whilst a young man, never found someone inside whom he felt a particular longing to be with so never formed any long term relationships.Isaac is determined to remain free and enjoy what he can of life in the years he has left. He enjoys being black; although he has no real association with others of his colour or race as there are few of North African heritage living close to where he is living. He felt more discrimination whilst in prison than he does living in normal society outside of prison. In prison, he had to align himself with prisoners of his colour whereas outside, he has many friends of white and black; something he could not do inside. Age has tempered his disposition and allowed him to make friends throughout the many ethnic communities within the community he now resides.His first book is of a white man who has a need to be black. The main character, Eric, has no idea why he has this need but it is a yearning inside him and his partner and friends cannot understand this need. He decides to go ahead and do it regardless of the cries of deplore by all those around him and accepts the challenges ahead of this regardless of their outcome; the outcome ending with his being sentenced to a term of incarceration. He anticipated being incarcerated as he was aware of the incarceration rate of black people but he did not expect the method used to put him in prison. His mind was altered; his deepening colour expedited and after an amount of time needed to absorb his new life, finds he likes being black; he likes prison and allows life to take him where it will. Life as a black man is different but it is what he desired and always wanted from a young man; he wants to remain black in his retirement and his benefactor allows this.

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Copyright

Copyright ©2021 by Isaac L Brown

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This book always remains the intellectual property of the writer under the Copyright Laws in Australia and the rest of the world.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. This document uses historical facts to weave a storyline and uses web based information to achieve this result, using Wikipedia, the free encyclopaedia as my main source.

ISBN

9781005735555

Prologue

When you meet a man of your dreams, can he accept changes in your appearance as you age; of course he does, mostly. But what about if you decide if you want to be different? Can an aging white man remain partnered to another aging white man if he changes his appearance from white to a black man? This is the age old question; does he love me for who I am of how I look? I discussed the idea with my partner, Harry, and he was intrigued by what I was saying. Intrigued, yes but questioned my reasons; questioned why. Why did I want to be black instead of white? Why I would want to jeopardize our relationship? He asked why I wanted to do this; asked if he was not satisfying me in some ways? I honestly couldn’t tell him answers he wanted to hear; I didn’t even know why I wanted or needed to do this. It was an ache inside me, telling me there was something I needed to do but didn’t know why. I needed to be black for a period of time yet I had no idea why I needed to do this; it was just a deep down need or yearning I had to do; an itch if you want to call it that; I had to be a black man for a period of time. But could I be a black man; alter my skin colour to make me credible and look black; alter my facial features to give a more credible look of a black man without reconstructive surgery. I didn’t want surgery in any way, shape or form; it all had to be reversible. Why? Just in case I didn’t like the look or feel of being black; just in case any alteration was too over powering for me; I had to have the option of being myself once again; for my sake and for Harry’s.

I didn’t marry a black guy; I don’t know if I want to live with a black guy? Harry said as we discussed it; more like argued right now. I understood what he said and his argument but in my own mind I had to become black. I had no sane reason for wanting to be black; just that deep down, I had to do it. Throughout my life I had seen how black people had been discriminated against; harassed by the police, looked down on by most white people; myself included, so why did I want to turn my skin colour darker? Yeah, you are right; a deep seated physiological problem; I had to be totally insane. I couldn’t blame it on drugs, so I had to have been born insane but it had taken this long to finally rear its ugly head. I had a perfectly good life; I was retired, had a wonderful man by my side and I wanted for nothing except my need to be black. It gnawed away inside me; had been for many years. It was an article I had seen on the Internet that had prompted my talking to Harry about doing it; bringing up the subject. The article had been about a young white college student that had decided to do research on exactly what had always been inside my mind; would I be treated differently as a black man and not a white man; he said yes.

This young man decided to research this very subject and started to take medication that increased the Melanin content in his body. Increasing Melanin caused the body to darken his skin colour. The medication he took was used by many to give them a darker sun tan without lying out in the sun so they didn’t age or cause skin cancers. It was called ‘A fast tan’. However, he said that he used the injections style of Melanin and continued to inject daily until his skin became dark and almost Negro like, then he maintained the colour. Once he reached that darker colour, he then went into the community and sought out the answers to his questions; would he be treated differently as a black man than when he was white? The answer was yes and within a week of going into the community, he had stopped maintaining his colour and allowed his skin to revert back to his original white skin. It didn’t go totally back to the original; it maintained a slightly darker colour for quite some time, giving him a decent tan for a while. So why did he stop his experiment so quickly?

Firstly, when he walked the streets, he found white people would try and avoid him and move over on the sidewalk or even cross the street in some circumstances. Police often stopped him to ask why he was in the area and what he was doing; he had never been stopped when walking in the same area as a white kid. When he entered bars, he was followed around by security staff and felt uncomfortable and would leave and seek a bar where there were other black kids. Restaurants would tell him there were no tables available when the restaurant was half empty. What he had found was a deep seated discrimination of black people within the city he lived in; discrimination he had never felt as a white boy. Harassment by police was commonplace; they would just stop the car and question why you were there or what you were doing; but never when he was white did police just stop and ask him those same questions.

He felt so uncomfortable being black that he stopped the experiment within a week of starting. He told a reporter that he felt uncomfortable, harassed by police and discriminated by business owners. The one thing he had not tried when black, was trying to get a job; he never got that far. Would he want to live as a black man? No, he didn’t feel safe. So why would I want to be black; go through the same feeling of doubt as this guy? I honestly didn’t know but I knew I had to do it; find out for myself; I had to be black. I know, it sounds stupid; idiotic; but when your mind tells you to do something, you usually don’t think too hard about it and do it. This time I really needed to think about it; and hard. Did I want to be black? My mind said yes but my ‘self preservation’ said no. Do I consider my thoughts of self preservation or ignore it; go along with my thoughts and suffer the consequences. As I said, if the going gets tough, I can stop taking the injections and my skin will revert back close to its original colour; something a real black person can’t do, they are stuck with their colour; no that isn’t quite true, Michael Jackson found a way to turn his skin white, but it killed him in the end..

Harry is dead set against it and I fear I will lose him if I go ahead with what I am proposing, but somehow I need to do it; to feel it, be it. What I need to consider is; if I lose Harry because of what I am doing, will I allow this to happen; how will I feel knowing I did the damage; ended our relationship? The courses of injections are reputed to take a period of several weeks and each injection will darken the skin fractionally. It is advised to stop the injections when you achieve a colour close to what you want to achieve as the injections will continue to darken the skin for a week or 2 after the last injection of the full strength drug. You then maintain the colour with weekly injections or stop entirely and the colour will then fade. I have researched the drug and am confident the side effects are manageable.

Side effects can make small blotches on the skin darken before the skin does so make them more visible. The drug can cause nausea for a few days. The skin may not return fully to the original colour after stopping the injections. I may never be able to rid myself of the pigmentation and remain black; would Harry remain as my partner if that happened? Our discussions over what I propose to do have been heated at times. His main concern is what others will think; his friends, his work mates; we have a good social life so will that be affected? Will others want to be friendly with a mixed couple as most of our friends are white? I even tried asking Harry to join me as a couple so we would both be black for a while, but he refused; he feared being black. Why would he fear being black? Because like me, he has seen discrimination at first hand and fears it against him. He knows that if his skin colour is black he will be harassed and discriminated against and is not willing to risk that, but I am. How can I tell what black people feel if I do not have the same reactions when I walk down the street or enter a shop or restaurant? I have to be black to suffer any indignation or discrimination to be able to understand what is happening to them. I might be retired; I might be old and grey, but I still care; I do not know if I am discriminating against others if I do not feel the discrimination against myself. I will document what happens to me as in some form of diary to make sure the feelings I have are genuine and recorded for posterity. I don’t want to be discriminated by; harassed or treated differently to anyone else but am I doing this myself as a white man? If so, then I have to know where and how and stop it. My question is this; do I discriminate towards black people? Will feeling the discrimination alter my perceptions of black people? If I am black, can I understand the harassment and discrimination as part of being black or is it a perceived harassment and discrimination; thoughts of being discriminated against or harassed and using my colour as an excuse? That’s stupid; people don’t use their own colour as an excuse to consider themselves as being discriminated against; harassed by just being black; do they? Is it the chip on their shoulder as feeling inferior because they are colored; or is it a genuine feeling because of how they are treated by others; by the police and by the Government and business owners. Are they discriminated against when applying for work? If they apply for work and have the same or similar qualifications as the other guy, will they be given the job or be passed by because they are black? All these questions are hypothetical at this moment; they need answers and I need to answer them.

Work; it allows a person to earn money and give them a certain life style. What you earn allows you to live, eat, own or rent a home, go out, drink a few beers or glasses of wine. It determines your level of comfort and standing within society. A labourer will mostly live in rented accommodation, maybe Government housing; being black will place you in black ghettos; it is where most of your family is and where you feel most comfortable. Some youth manage to lift themselves out of the poverty most black people suffer but do they rid themselves of the stigma of the black ghetto? No; this is where their family still live so they visit there often, mix with childhood friends and remain with a ghetto mentality even though they have tried to lift themselves out of the ghetto. It will take generations of education and living in the better suburbs for their own family to lift themselves out of this society and graduate to a more Middle Class image; but they are still black so do they still feel discriminated against; harassed by the police and marginalized by Government?

For me to be black, to be part of what they feel, I have to live in their areas; live within their sphere of influence; have an address that shows me as living in the black ghettos and then applying for a simple job that does not demand too much education. However, I have to have an identity that is unmistakably black. There are ways to get fake identities to allow me to apply for work under this name and with this qualification. To buy a fake birth certificate, Identity card and drivers license will cost about $1000; am I willing to go this far? With this fake ID, I can apply to do a short course in ‘Traffic Management’ a course for those who need work in an ever expanding market and yet not need a good education. It is a simple job for those who either have little education or do not want an over taxing occupation. It pays decent wages but is not a permanent job; it is classed as casual. These courses can cost up to $500 but can give a decent wage when employed as they work odd hours and are subject to many different penalty rates for daytime, night time, ‘Away From Home’ allowances if working in remote areas. Their hours are sporadic at first until the employers see their level of commitment, dedication and skills. I know I said at the beginning that I was retired, but I could still work a full day if required and I am willing to do this if I decide to go black and see if I can really function as a black man with little or no education. Harry says I am insane; I agree with him.

Note: - In this story I use many words that may offend such as Negro, Nigger and Black. I do not, however, use the words people of Colour and try not to use the word Colored. I quote from an article written by Pamela Oliver called ‘Race Names’; an article written in 2017. My thanks for the ability to use this article for my own education and instruction so I can try and make my story as true to real life as I can. I quote;

The Big insult name is Nigger and its variant Nigga. This is the n- word. She quotes the word as ‘always an insult" yet also says the usage by black people for their own use is acceptable. It is within this context that I use these words. I applied to Pamela Oliver for permission to use this quote and was told that all I had to do was place an acceptance and referral to the Author and article; please accept the above as the permission to use.

Chapter1 – Slow but sure.

The first thing I have to do is buy the injections to darken my skin colour. They are available on line so not a hard task there. My research has found that it is illegal to import these products without a special licence but there are places in Chicago that are allowed to sell these drugs legally. I contacted one of these businesses and received a very welcoming message; the kits were available to me without prescription. The cost was $145.00 for a single kit and depending on how dark I wanted to go, also determined the total cost of extra kits required; this I could not say until I started the injections and saw the results. It was a slow process and the side effects were debilitating at first. Nausea put me in my bed for 4 days on the first injection so I waited until I felt well enough to continue. 1 week later, I started the injections again but this time I started with a lower dose than recommended and used this dose for 3 injections before I upped the quantity again. From the initial 6ml injection, I had reduced it to 2ml then after 3 days to 3ml and again after 3 days to 4ml and so forth. I am now back to 6ml and handling the side effects well. There is a slight nausea affect within the first couple of hours but my body has become used to it now and each morning, there is a slight hangover feeling which is easily taken care of by a couple of Paracetamol tablets. It has taken 3 weeks of injections to actually see any results but my skin is showing slight darkening now.

3 weeks of injections has shown results in my hands and feet. My hands and arms which are normally exposed to direct sunlight and are now darker; more like the colour of a lighter skinned Sub Continent Indian man; a coffee colour of the fingers are more noticeable as the finger nails are now pink in relation to the skin of the fingers which are darker coffee coloured and definitely of a darker skinned man. It is the same with my toes and exposed skin of my feet where I tend to wear thongs or scuffs rather than shoes or boots when outside. My exposed arms from where my short sleeve shirts leave uncovered are a similar colour to my hands and my legs and torso are yet to show any significant colour change but there is a slight difference; but my cock and balls are distinctly darker. The progress is slow but I am happy with the results so far; but Harry isn’t.

I can see the difference; maybe you can’t but I can. I don’t like what is happening Eric. He said to me.

Why Harry; have I changed so much?

You’re insane Eric; why do you want to be black; don’t you love me?

You know I love you Harry, but do you love me; do you love me enough to support me in whatever I do?

We have been together since we were in our early 20’s; we have been together for more than 40 years; would I have stayed for that long if I did not love you?

You do not enjoy the added sex these drugs give us; the added increase in my libido? I asked him.

I must agree that your increased libido is a pleasant side effect; we haven’t had that much sex for many years. But an increase in sex drive does not mean I agree with what you are doing Harry?

I have never felt so alive Harry; I don’t know if it is the excitement of expectation on slowly becoming black or just the feeling of sexual excitement I have not felt for so long?

Being black is not going to automatically make you a great lover Eric?

My cock is turning black too Harry; don’t you like black cocks inside you? I asked him.

I have never had sex with black men; if I had wanted or liked sex with black men, I would have sought out a black partner instead of you? He said, but it was not a pleasant reaction to my question.

You are prejudiced against black men aren’t you?

I don’t think I am prejudiced; just that I prefer white men.

If I had been black when we first met, would you have gone to bed with me that first night? I asked him; I wanted to know his real thoughts now.

No; I never liked sex with black men; I never looked for sex with black men.

So you are prejudiced?

If that is prejudiced, then yes; I am. Harry answered. I now knew why he objected to my experiment.

You are one of those I want to test Harry; you are one of those people who would rather cross the street than walk on the same walkway as a black man; I never thought you were discriminatory against black men?

I’m not; you are forcing me to make statements I do not want to make. He said.

No Harry; you are answering questions you have always felt but never been asked before; you are prejudiced against coloured people. Why? What have they done to you to make you so prejudiced?

I don’t like black men.

I’m not talking about sex Harry; I’m talking about a feeling about black men in general; what have they done to you to deserve these thoughts?

If you really loved me, you would stop this nonsense immediately. He said but as a demand.

I could say the same about you Harry; if I was ill, would you support me or leave me?

I would support you of course? He said without hesitation.

Then what I am doing now; is that not a sickness of the mind; am I not acting insanely and needing your support?

No; this is a conscious decision and it will wreck our relationship; why are you doing this Eric?

Wreck our relationship; so you will not support my need to do this? If I continue, will you desert me or demand I leave this house? I asked him; I was determined to know where I stood.

I hope it does not come to that Eric.

That was not the right answer Harry; that answer tells me you have already considered those options and that worries me; no scares me. You don’t want me to carry on with this do you? If I carry on, you will either leave or ask me to go? What will it be Harry; me or you?

This is my home Eric; I have nowhere else to go; I am too old to find another home?

And I am not? I need to do this Harry and if you will not support me, then I have to leave and find my own way; as a black man and do what I need to do.

Then please leave; leave now before I throw you out; I will not live with a black man.

I finally found out his true colours; he was prejudiced and racist and I had never felt so alone; but I was determined to carry it through; with or without him. I went into the bedroom and pulled out my small suitcase; I didn’t want to have too many personal items to carry around as I would have to seek a small room somewhere until Harry came around or we finally separated. I packed old clothes only; I felt I had no need for any good clothes as I was not going to be socialising with our gay friends or any friends for that matter. I had my pension and separate bank account; we had always kept our money separate but also had a joint account. This paid the usual expenses of the house such as power and council rates for our house. As I had been a tradesman when working I had a stack of old work clothes, so packed these until the case was full, then walked out of the house without saying goodbye.

I was sad; saddened by Harry’s reaction. I was now alone with my need to be black. I had lost any support I might have had from Harry but I was determined to continue on and find out what it was like to be black. I had to know; it was an obsession now, especially now I was out of my home and homeless. I knew of a few men’s shelters and headed to them by bus. I had to try 4 shelters before I got a bed for the night; it was in a dormitory style and I shared the room with 7 others. Tomorrow I would seek something more permanent. Before I unpacked a