How Not to Be Old (Even If You Are)

By Jill Orr

A PEOPLE Magazine Editor's Pick!

“The book brims with wisdom, heart and self-deprecating humor. Friend to every generation, Jill Orr writes with an easy, knowing style — you can practically sense her smile radiating through the page.”
— Columbia Daily Tribune

Old suggests you have life experience, but OLD means you won’t shut up about it. Old brings with it a more relaxed pace of life, while OLD is synonymous with slow driving (and even slower digestion). Old comes with a quiet confidence envied by youth, but OLD comes with bitterness and a rigidity that youth cannot rightfully stand. While growing old is a privilege, becoming OLD is optional. If you don’t mind being “Okay, Karen-ed” by Millennials and Gen Zs, that's totally your choice. But if want to update some of your long-held beliefs (and possibly your even-longer-held hairstyle) to become more relevant, How Not to Be Old will clue you in on how a slight adjustment in behavior and thinking will help you more fully connect with today’s world... and the people who will be in charge of your nursing home one day.

A humorous how-to guide on aging gracefully… or not. Perfect gift for boomers, GenX, & millennials looking to find the funny in getting older.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Prospect Park Books
• Release date: Nov 10, 2020
• ISBN: 9781945551949

Jill Orr

Jill Orr is the author of The Good Byline, The Bad Break, and The Ugly Truth. A graduate of the University of Missouri Journalism School, Orr lives in Columbia, Missouri, with her husband and two children. The Full Scoop is her fourth novel. Learn more at jillorrauthor.com.

Book preview

WHAT IS OLD?

Aging gets a bad rap, even though we all know it’s better than the alternative. Basically, getting older just means you’re not dead yet, and not being dead is kind of the whole point.

But getting older is not to be confused with getting OLD.

Old has life experience, but OLD won’t shut up about it. Old knows what they want out of life; OLD is intolerant of anything less. Old enjoys a slower pace of life, while OLD tops out at 37 mph on the highway.

The good news is that while being old is a privilege, becoming OLD is optional. And it’s easy to avoid with a few simple updates. This book will show you how a slight adjustment in behavior and thinking will help you more fully connect with today’s world… and with the people who will be in charge of your nursing home one day.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU NEED THIS BOOK

•You involuntarily make a noise when you sit down.

•You think TikTok is the sound a clock makes.

•You’ve said, at some point in the last 30 days, I can’t hear myself think.

•You pretend you understand text abbreviations sent by Millennial coworkers… and may have once used AF because you thought it meant and friends!

•You play canasta, mahjong, or bridge.

•You consider dad jokes just jokes.

•Your recent Google searches include ergonomic chairs, better sleep supplements, and/or how to delete a post on