Road to a Happy Marriage

By Charles O. Uzoaru M.D.

Why do some marriages last while others break up? What can a couple do to keep their marital bond alive and well? How does one make the right choice and avoid getting entrapped into a miserable relationship? Marriage is like a journey up the hill made by two consenting partners. For that journey to take off and be successful, you must first choose a partner. Who your partner is and how you make that choice will determine greatly the success or failure of that matrimonial journey.
Wouldnt it be nice to have a crystal ball that could reveal the future of any marital relationship and minimize or even eliminate all the heartbreaks and agonizing disappointments endured by lots of married people all over the world? Well, there is no such crystal ball. Yet, there are certain steps which, if taken appropriately, can lead to a viable, durable and happy marital relationship. That is what this book is all about. The author ties together the various factors that can affect a marriage and leads the reader through a clear understanding of what marriage is supposed to be and the best approach to a blissful marriage relationship.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Feb 21, 2011
• ISBN: 9781456735050

Charles O. Uzoaru M.D.

Charles Onyegbule Uzoaru,M.D. is a graduate of Columbia University, New York (1974), and the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, Philadelphia (1977). He is a practicing Obstetrician/Gynecologist. His first novel, Behind a Timid Mask, was published in 2005. His book, Road to a Happy Marriage, was published in 2011.

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© 2011 Charles O. Uzoaru, M.D. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 2/16/2011

ISBN: 978-1-4567-3505-0 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-3506-7 (dj)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-3507-4 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011902387

Printed in the United States of America

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

Part One.

Chapter 1.

Chapter two.

Part Two.

Lesson #1:

Lesson #2:

Lesson #3:

Lesson #4:

Lesson #6:

Lesson #7:

Lesson #8:

Lesson #9:

Lesson #10:

Lesson #11:

Lesson #12:

Lesson #13:

Lesson #14:

Lesson #15:

Lesson #16:

Lesson #17:

Lesson #18:

Lesson #19:

Lesson #20:

Lesson #21:

Lesson #22:

Lesson #23:

Lesson #24:

Lesson #25:

Part Three.

Example #1:

Example #2:

Example #3:

Example #4:

Example #5:

Example #6:

Example #7:

Example #8:

Part Four.

Dedication:

To married couples all over the world, particularly those who stand together through thick and thin thereby giving credence, honor and respect to the sanctity of marriage.

Introduction:

Marriage is a topic that brings so many questions to mind. Why do some marriages last while others don’t? What can a couple do to keep the marriage bond alive and well? Are any two people unavoidably meant for each other? Is marriage between two individuals a divine will or something imposed by humans? What constitutes a good marriage? Should I or should I not marry someone I’m in love with? Will marriage lead me to hell, heaven, or somewhere in-between? After seeing what married couples go through, should I bother getting married in the first place? Is marriage as beautiful, or as awful as some parents and other married couples make it seem? Does good marriage come from destiny, good luck, or hard work? What if I end up marrying the wrong person? When is someone ready for marriage? Which is better; marriage with all the marital responsibilities, or single life (or even co-habitation) with greater freedom? How does one make the ‘right’ choice and avoid getting entrapped into a miserable relationship? What makes one fall in love at first sight when someone else drags both feet until the ground gives in from below? Why do some people regard marriage as a lifetime commitment while others view it as a pastime and a casual experiment? Can someone find love one day and hatred the next day? Do some individuals make marriages work better than others? What brings success to a particular marriage and failure to others? At what age and stage in life is someone mature and competent enough to make a marriage commitment? Who is better at making a marriage work, man or woman? What role does an offspring play in the strengthening, weakening or destruction of a marriage? What roles do such variables as poverty, wealth, education, Illiteracy, religion, culture, social status, politics, infertility, and race play in the success or failure of a marriage? The questions go on and on.

Getting married is like walking into a future that’s full of unknowns and unpredictable variables. Who knows what the future will bring? We can’t judge the success or failure of a future marriage by other people’s marital behavior, experience and outcome. That our parents or married neighbors hated or loved each is not a guarantee that we, too, shall follow in their footsteps.

Marriage is like a journey up the hill by two consenting partners. To make that journey, you must first choose a partner. Who your partner is and how you make that choice will greatly determine the success or failure of that journey up the hill.

You are like an individual on a stage in front of an excited crowd of loyal fans. Each fan wants to shake your hand. You are eager to oblige them. But, there is one problem. You are allowed to shake only one hand. And, once you shake that hand, it becomes a permanent part of you. Whose hand should you shake? How do you decide the hand that is most appropriate and suitable for you?

Wouldn’t it be nice to have a crystal ball that could reveal the future outcome of a marital relationship? Such a crystal ball would minimize or even eliminate heart-breaks and agonizing disappointments endured by lots of married people all over the world.

Well, there is no such crystal ball. Yet, there are certain steps which, if taken, can lead one in the right direction for a marital relationship that is viable, happy, and long-lasting.

Part One.

THE OVERWIEW.

Chapter 1.

As unpredictable as marriage outcome can be, there are certain principles which, if followed correctly, will minimize or eliminate the negative forces that tend to dishearten married couples and tear their marriages apart. Those principles are summarized in what may be described as a ‘roadmap to happy marriage’.

There is one aspect of marriage, however, that merits attention prior to the discussion of the actual roadmap. It is a picture, a visual image of what marriage is all about. It’s a model of concepts and principles of marriage portrayed on a canvas and may be described as an ‘artistic expression of marriage’.

Let’s have a close look at the canvas which depicts the various details of a marital journey. It offers us a good, comprehensive view of what marriage is (or is not) supposed to be. The knowledge we gather from this canvas can serve as a helpful guide to individuals who are either contemplating marriage, are in the process of getting married, or are already married.

On this canvas, we see several individuals who are standing alone in different locations of a large field. Each person is a stranger to everybody else. The field is flat; the landscape well groomed. The air is fresh; the weather is soothing, and the birds are singing.

There is a nearby towering hill whose top embraces and blends in with the soft whitish-blue sky. From a distance, the hill itself has a fairly steep slope with a rough surface. Yet, it is richly adorned with plants, flowers and vibrant vegetation.

Every person on the field is at liberty to either maintain his or her privacy; or socialize with others. Some are too quick to socialize and engage others in a conversation; others are too reserved