REPAIR for Kids: A Children's Program for Recovery from Incest & Childhood Sexual Abuse

By Marjorie McKinnon and Tom McKinnon

R.E.P.A.I.R is Recognition, Entry, Process, Awareness, Insight, and Rhythm
Enter a Six-Stage Program with your 6 to 11-year-old child to cross the "Bridge of Recovery" and make available a whole new world of hope: Uncover and acknowledge feelings by discovering emotion Build self-esteem and optimism with the "Magic Mirror" Discern healthy and unhealthy messages Learn special games to rebuild courage and optimism Reveal inner states with picture drawing Break free from the confines of false shame Cultivate self-care skills and practices Learn about boundaries and bodies Return to the natural rhythm and flow of life
Therapists' Acclaim for the REPAIR system
"REPAIR for Kids provides a comprehensive, honest and passionate approach for children recovering from sexual abuse. Children will benefit from this book, and be encouraged to continue on their recovery journey." --Jill Osborne, Ed.S, author of Sam Feels Better Now
"I wish I had had something like this a long time ago for my sad and shamed 'little girl' within. I can't think of anything I'd change. You have covered it all and with wonderful sensitivity, perfect timing and terrific repair exercises. I love the cartoons and the colorfulness of your book as well." --Marcelle Taylor, MFT
"I found this book to be well thought out and written, and one that would be helpful for any child who has known the pain of sexual abuse. I wish a caring adult had shared this book with my siblings and myself, it would have helped ease our pain and sorrow." --Michael Skinner, musician and child mental health advocate
JNF053170 Juvenile Nonfiction : Social Issues - Sexual Abuse
FAM001010 Family & Relationships : Abuse - Child Abuse
PSY004000 Psychology : Developmental - Child

• Language: English
• Publisher: Loving Healing Press
• Release date: Jun 1, 2008
• ISBN: 9781615999347

Marjorie McKinnon

Marjorie McKinnon has been writing since the age of thirteen, when she wrote poetry to hide her pain. Despite her father's confession in her mid-thirties about an incestuous relationship he'd had with her that began when she was thirteen, she had buried all memories of the childhood trauma. She had run away from home when she was eighteen and spent the next 27 years going from one abuser to another. During that time she was hospitalized twice for suicide attempts, spent time in a women's shelter and raised four children as a single mother. During recovery she wrote about her experience and what it was like to emerge on the other side of "the bridge of recovery." It is a chronicle of growing up in small Midwestern towns in a Catholic family and of hiding her anguish behind words, poetry that she termed her inner voices. It is also a detailed account of the journey one takes in going from a place of despair to one of joy. That book, titled I Never Heard A Robin Sing became her first attempt to publish. When Marjorie was half way through recovery she found out that her two older daughters had been sexually abused by her second husband. Her youngest daughter had been raped at gunpoint while working at a fast food place when she was 17. This so totally accents the reality that child sexual abuse is a multi-generational problem. Unable to sell her memoir, she spent several years writing other books: a fiction trilogy, two other novels, four volumes of poetry, and 14 non-fiction works, six of which have been pubished. Marjorie re-read her own first person account to re-walk the path she had taken. She never realized at the time how blessed she was, for that path, though rugged, was straight, and in retrospect provided her with invaluable help to spend three years creating the REPAIR program. Loving Healing Press has published six of her books: REPAIR Your Life: A Program for Recovery from Incest & Childhood Sexual Abuse, REPAIR For Kids, REPAIR For Toddler, REPAIR For Teens, REPAIR Your Life Workbook and It's Your Choice! Decisions That Will Change Your Life. Hello My Name is Marjorie, a book she is currently working on is an email account of her courtship with Tom McKinnon, her husband, who she met on the Internet while doing genealogy research on McKinnons (her name was also McKinnon). Tom did the illustrations for the two the children's versions of her REPAIR books. They now live in the Sedona, AZ area. Marjorie is also the founder of The Lamplighter Movement, a rapidly growing international movement for recovery from child sexual abuse that emphasizes the importance of REPAIRing the damage. Most of her chapters are using her REPAIR program as a model for recovery. Currently there are 92 Lamplighter Movement chapters in thirteen countries including 18 in Africa. Marjorie is trying to get Lamplighter chapters in all of the women's prisons. So far they have two, one in Chino, CA and one in Gadsden, Florida.She is also trying to get chapters established in high schools and women's shelters. The Lamplighter's website is at www.thelamplighters.org

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Reviews for REPAIR for Kids

[americaseditor · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This book is a workbook for children who have suffered sexual abuse. The book has valuable points and instructions for adults. However, the vocabulary level is not consistent. The length of some passages might be overwhelming for a child, but working through it repetitiously, as the book suggests, could have some value for children. The subject of molestation is not directly approached, so much of the material in this book might be useful to religious parents who want to help a child who has experienced a traumatic event. This book should be a supplemental resource, not a main one.

[vampireeat · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Children's materials are hardly my forte, and this book was somewhat difficult for me to get through. As the subtitle suggest, the book is not really in a linear format; it acts as a sort of a series of different strategies for getting a child to talk about being sexually abused. Only it doesn't. The book is really aimed at getting a child talking about their emotions, presumably one who isn't talking very much because of a situation of sexual abuse. I mean, that's my guess. It really could be applied towards getting a child talking about their emotions in general. It uses a model called REPAIR, which also stems from the book's title. In implementing the REPAIR model, the first step: R for 'Recovery' - has to make the assumption that the child is broken. Indeed, many of the early mentions in the title speak of the child needing to be 'fixed.' I wasn't really a fan of using this type of metaphor for a child, especially because the book reinforces the idea that nothing is wrong with them over and over again. It gives a mixed signal; the child is broken, but nothing is wrong with them. I think that can lead to confusion from the child who has definitely already suffered enough. Using the REPAIR model, the child is also compared to a stepped on garden plant (p.16). If you take care of the plant, talk to it, etc. it can be REPAIRED! the book tells us. I have a problem with comparing abused children to stomped on flora, especially if I'm expected to read this idea aloud to the child as the text intends.The author includes a guide for adults using the title towards the beginning. One of the steps includes encouraging a child to talk about natural language, i.e. penis, breast. So it becomes confusing for me when you read on in the book and the text seemingly avoids using this type of language. I think a child might feel more comfortable using natural language if the words were spoken by an adult administering the program or stated in the text itself first. Ideally, both would probably be key. This at least gives the child a point of reference so they can feel more comfortable speaking this way. I also think the title should have a little bit more of a guide for adults at the beginning. It encourages adult to speak to children 'on their level of language' ... but gives no tips or hints how. Several generalized statements like this throughout made me feel frustrated while reading. I ultimately cannot give this book a completely low rating because of the activities that are included. Several of them are good and even clever at getting the child to talk; some are just 'write down your feelings' exercises, while others give multiple choice questions. Many would probably get a child's creative process going which would no doubt get them talking and, ultimately, feeling more comfortable with the adult administering the program. If you can take one thing from this text, take the activities. I think if a child isn't talking, and you need to try to get them to tell you what's happened, these activities can help accomplish that. The workbook format with fun, colorful pictures throughout are also a nice touch. This gives a child the ability to do the activities independently which is good for the intended range of ages 6 to 12.

[helcura_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I have mixed feelings about this book.One of the hardest things for adults who are working with children who have been sexually abused is to know what to do, and this book offers a series of basic self-esteem exercises that appear to provide a road map. The book has brightly colored pictures, a relentlessly upbeat tone (exclamation marks pop up throughout the book like dandelions), and clear instructions. It could easily be a useful adjunct to customized therapy, or it might be used by a non-professional with guidance from a professional.It is not, however, a replacement for therapy. The language is too difficult for children at the lower end of the recommended age range (6-12) and too patronizing for children at the upper end. The activities (affirmations, journaling, etc.) are too generalized and only vaguely address actual abuse. (There is commentary on "yucky" touching, but no clear references to appropriately named body parts.) Sexually abused children need a great deal of help which is customized to their individual situations and this book is not a place to start, and most definitely not a place to end.

[heather19_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I have to admit that when I recieved this Early Reviewer book, a part of me went "what the heck am I doing?". I am not a child, nor was I ever abused. How could I possibly read this book and connect with the message within these pages? The answer became clear as I began reading: The same way I do with every other good self-help book. This book is geared toward ages 6 to 12, so it is written in a simple language that children will understand. The context may be overwhelming at first to children, but the calm and child-friendly mode of this book helps to take it one step at a time. Colorful pictures and simple analogies will help children open up and understand the steps to recovery. There are fun lists and excercises to fill out that will focus their attention on the good parts of life and of themselves.I definitely think this is a VERY important book for any child who has been sexually abused.

[moxiehart · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Before I start this review, I would like to state that I fully support this book's intentions--who wouldn't support helping children recover from sexual abuse? Unfortunately, the book suffers in the execution.The book is formatted as a workbook that's full of exercises for young children to practice. The exercises are based on the concept of "REPAIR," which stands for recognition, entry, process, awareness, insight, and rhythm. The acronym is difficult to remember and I wonder if I, as a 25 year-old am having trouble remembering it, if a 6 or 7 year-old will be able to remember it. Stylistically, there are many grammar errors and the author is certainly fond of ellipses. Children mimic what they read and I wouldn't want to have my hypothetical child pick up these habits.At one point, the author compares molestors to monsters, which I found troubling. Molestors are real, that's what makes them so frightening, and children should be given the tools to avoid them. Molesters shouldn't be given a Voldemort-like power.Also, she says that, "Happy people have not had anything bad happen to them" (16). This is a bizarre claim--there is no one on earth that hasn't had something bad happen to them. The difference is that happy people have learned healthy coping skills.Finally, this book isn't secular. There are references to guardian angels and the Serenity Prayer. I'd find it alienating if I were a child of another faith or from an athiest family.On the plus side, the many font changes should keep childrens' attention. There also are exercises to practice dealing with situations involving bullies and manipulative people.To be honest, I went to the author's webpage, thelamplighters.org, to look up her credentials. While I think that she earnestly cares about the well-being of sexual abuse survivors, I found her lack of scholarly credentials to be disturbing. I would rather take advice from someone that was a licensed social worker, therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist, who had done clinical research to discover what was the best course to treat victims of sexual abuse.

[neilandlisa · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I had a very difficult time reading this book, as it stirred up very unpleasant memories, but I agree with other reviewers. I have mixed feelings about it as well. The author is so well-meaning I feel bad saying anything negative about it, but the title alone took me aback. It's pretty hard (impossible?) to "repair" or "recover" from the damage from sexual abuse and incest, but maybe that's nitpicky. Bigger problems rest with the graphics and inconsistent voice; is this a book for children in therapy or is it for adults? Either way, I think this would be a helpful read for parents or guardians who are trying to help an abused child. It would make a good companion to other books on the subject.

[discerningmedia · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This book is a workbook for children who have suffered sexual abuse. The book has valuable points and instructions for adults. However, the vocabulary level is not consistent. The length of some passages might be overwhelming for a child, but working through it repetitiously, as the book suggests, could have some value for children. The subject of molestation is not directly approached, so much of the material in this book might be useful to religious parents who want to help a child who has experienced a traumatic event. This book should be a supplemental resource, not a main one.

[jotoyo_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I read through most of the material in this book, but it was my wife who gave me the rating. She has been trained in this field and had heard about this book through her work. She said the book was well done, and said that the illustrations were good, as they were simplistic enough for a child to interpret. Since the book is intended as a tool to be used with other forms of therapy it may not suit every child or situation, but she felt that it was a big step in the right direction.However, it is difficult to know whether it is good until one has ecperience in using it, and that has not happened yet with my wife. The whole topic of sexual abuse in children is difficult to discuss as adults and so I will leave the merits of the book to the professionals. With this book and other materials, and their training and respect for children, children can be helped. That is the most important thing to remember.