Where There's a Will, There's a Way

By Tre' Bryant

Through these pages lies the heart-gripping life story of Tre' Bryants' experience as a domestic violence victim and a survivor. She's dealt with everything from molestation, rape, depression, suicidal tendencies, low self-esteem and survived a 20-year toxic relationship. Fortunately, Tre' is here to share her story of how she took her life back and persevered. Tre' is the epitome of struggle to strength, and Where There's a Will, There's a Way is proof that our best lessons are learned through tears and fears. Now that Tre's tears are gone, she's rediscovered herself and utilizes her strength to help those in similar situations find their strength. To read her story is to understand her struggle. Where there's a will, there's a way.....so says God in the end.

• Language: English
• Publisher: New Breed Publishing LLC
• Release date: Jun 12, 2015
• ISBN: 9780983343899

Book preview

Where There’s a Will, There’s a Way

By

Tre’ Bryant

Where There’s a Will, There’s a Way

Copyright © by Tre’ L. Bryant

All rights reserved 2015

NEW BREED PUBLISHING

ISBN 13: 978-0-9833438-5-1

ISBN 10: 0983343853

Library of Congress Cat. Num. in-pub.-Data

PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

New Breed Publishing presents:

Where There’s a Will, There’s a Way: To know my story is to understand my struggle

This book is a work of non-fiction. The author intentionally left names of individuals out and replaced with fake names to protect their privacy and maintain their anonymity. Throughout this book are periods of shared personal events and experiences of the author, followed with the unsolicited advice from a personal standpoint. No part of this book is written with advice from a professional counselor or therapist.

Cover design by:  Kreative Solutions by Mahogani/Tanisha Pettiford

Editing/Typesetting; Lakia McDaniel for New Breed Publishing.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to all of the many victims and survivors of Domestic Violence. If it was not for my personal story and the inspiration of other’s, I wouldn’t be able to share my story with the world. Through my blood, sweat, and tears, I salute the survivor in all of us, and I also pray for those who are still in need. I thank the many survivors who shared their personal stories of survival, especially DS and JL at the end of the day you ladies are my sheroes.

Thank you to my children who supported me and gave me their blessing in writing my book. It is because of you I made it. Through your individual strengths you kept me strong, focused, and positive. No matter what greatness I achieve in this life, the biggest achievement of them all is being blessed with the two of you. May mommy’s strength inspire you to seek out your dreams and make them come true. Know that I will support you both the same as you did me. I love the both of you endlessly, and you will forever be my babies.

My beautiful adopted family that encouraged me to keep on going and follow my heart. The days I felt like giving up, you were there cheering me on. I have been so blessed to have you all on this journey and I thank you personally. You ladies are living proof that family does not have to always be blood but loyal and supportive. You came to me in many forms such as aunts and sisters, but overall you have become my family for life and know that I thank God for blessing me with you. To my sisters from another set of parents LED, TH and CD; I love you and my aunts LT, and WR, and RA, thanks for having me in your lives.

    To my family whom supported my dream from day one, I thank you. Whether you are immediate or extended family I appreciate you, especially my support system. You ladies already know who you are. Thanks for helping through my transition and showing me the true meaning of family and sisterhood. For I am my sister’s keeper. I love you to pieces KS, DP and AET.

A special thank you to Lakia Nichole for EVERYTHING you have done. You have been an amazing mentor personally and professionally. You inspire me.

I always believed in Angels but it was not until the day I met you I believed I had one. You encourage me to be my very best and you show me the true meaning of unconditional love. You told me I should follow my heart and I did. My best friend, mentor, life coach, and life partner, I salute you. You told me one day that you thought I was great, but truth is I wasn’t great until the day someone thought that I was and inspired me to be. This journey has been like no other, and I am so blessed. If you were writing this, you would correct me and say that WE are blessed. Your presence is appreciated more than you will ever know and that means EVERYTHING to me. I love you.

Humbled Beginnings

My journey began on January 28, 1974 in Detroit, Michigan. I was born at Sinai Hospital around 10:00 am to parents who were high school sweethearts. They married not too long after my dad returned back from the army, where he had been stationed in Germany. Three years prior to my arrival, they had experienced a tragic loss, when my brother was delivered stillborn. Although my older brother was irreplaceable, I was considered quite a blessing for them. Growing up, my mom use to always tell me  that I was the apple of everyone’s eye in both families and  close friends, because I was their first child. They finally got their blessing when they’d learned I was a healthy baby girl. I remember vividly growing up on the eastside of Detroit in a house located directly next door to my paternal Grandfather. Through the years, my grandfather would become one of the biggest influences in my life. Recollection of my earlier memories seemed happier. My younger brother was born in March of 1976 and everything seemed to be going good in my young life, until I started to experience change once I turned four-years old. I knew both my parents loved me and would never put me intentionally in harm’s way. While my mom worked part-time at a department store and my dad worked for the government, they had to leave my younger brother and me to be cared for by others. It wasn’t an option for my parents, because they did what they needed to do. I can still recall to this very day a family member coming over to keep us when my parents were working. While my dad was at work and my mom was heading to work, actual events began to take place. At age four, someone in the family started molesting me and continued for about a year. I remember being touched and fingered with Vaseline as a lubricant. I was told to pull my panties down on several occasions and stand very still. Frightened, his finger entered my vagina and at that point, he began to please himself.  I was fearful of telling my parents, but I also didn’t understand what was happening and why. From that moment, I felt like I had to protect myself, because I thought no one would understand or believe me if I told them. I learned at an early age how to deal with my sad and hurt emotions by simply putting it in the back of my mind and leaving them there. That was the beginning of my emotional detachment and I began to shy away from people by hiding my hurt from the world.

That stripped something from me mentally, and I found that being a normal kid was not in my future because of what had taken place. I was exposed to sexual acts way before my time. I felt my life could never be normal because of what I quietly went through. I don’t know if anyone ever paid the relationship between me and the individual who violated me any attention. I was very uncomfortable around him, and when he was around I would shut down completely. Everyone knew and adored this guy, but no one knew that he would make me go to the bathroom when my parents weren’t home, apply Vaseline to his finger, insert it into my vagina, then wiggle his finger inside of me. I don’t know what kind of grown man would get a thrill off of pleasing himself off an innocent four- year old girl but he did. I was young and had no idea of what was taking place, but I knew it couldn’t have been right. I’m sure my parents would have protected me if only I had said something. At four, you don’t know what’s going on or even know how to describe what’s happening. You just know that it can’t be right, because I was only a baby. This grown ass man was very aware of what he was doing, and he stole my innocence.

Once I started school, I always felt like an outcast. I remembered what I had experienced at the age of four and as a result, I felt that people could look at me and see that I was hiding something painfully deep inside. By this time, my parents decided that their eleven year marriage was over and my life seemed to have gotten worse.  I’m not sure what happened that my Dad ended up leaving the house, but I knew that the marriage was over and that he was never coming back. I also remember wanting to blame myself for my Dad leaving. I felt like he knew what happened and that’s why he was leaving. As a child, you don’t know the reasons and you think everything everybody does is your fault.  You just know you’re hiding something painful and to find that your dad is leaving you…it automatically makes you feel that it’s your fault. Once my dad finally left and my mom decided to file for divorce, no one could have ever imagined how that decision would impact my life in such a negative way. Again, I thought everything was my fault and everything bad was happening because of my dark secret and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. Life began to be a constant change for me. When the divorce was final, I felt abandoned by my dad, because he and my mom ended things in a horrible place. We kids were affected the most. I don’t remember many details, but I do know that they couldn’t talk or reach any kind of understanding when it came to their kids. There were always trips to the Wayne County Friend of The Court. We were also caught in the middle with threatened custody battles between the two of them.

My mom had it hard raising us on her own