Living my Dream

By Delcio Mauro Neto de Almeida

I always thought I could have been somebody and do beautiful things with my life; but life hit me hard and I distracted myself from what I was supposed to be doing. I lost track and focused on entertainment. It was a life that most of us would love to live as it was fun. Later I cried, and it took me over 10 years of my life to get back on track and start what I never had a chance to begin.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: May 25, 2014
• ISBN: 9781483529080

Book preview

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CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION

I would like to share with you some of my life stories and thoughts; but before I go further, I would like to tell you about my vision and understanding of life and dreams. I would like you to understand a bit about me first, so here it is.

I am 32 years old and I have lived in three different countries, which are Angola, Portugal and England. I would like to share with you some of the stories of my life.

Apparently I seem to be a man with a large ego, a fighter, a person of decisiveness; I think that I am a man with principles. But as with every human being, I have areas that need work. I think I am a good listener and a friend, someone direct and objective, but sentimental, too.

I have my ups and downs like everyone else. I prefer to be in my space, which is in my comfort zone at home with all the entertainment I need in order to keep myself busy.

My room is my favorite place to chill, but I don't sleep or spend my time in bed; much of my time is spent on my chair in front of the desktop computer. I spend most of my time working mainly on my writing skills and making music.

I am teachable, I can learn; but nowadays I only like to learn things that are of interest to me. There are lots of things going on in my head.

Today's world we live in is falling apart. I cannot trust or allow anybody to dictate to me and I cannot follow anyone, either. So I now take my time for any decision I make. I tend to clear my thoughts and then analyze. I am not a judgmental person. I'm far from that, but I am reserved and I like to keep it that way, as I feel safer rather than expose myself to the public.

Sometimes I get caught up in my research and I start believing what I read and start to live that. It seems so real to me that I stress myself trying to apply and experience all the new information I received from the internet.

They say that God has many different ways to express himself to guide us, and perhaps that's how he shows me the way. Since I feel I am in between the bad and the good side of life, and I am asking for help, I know he's listening to me. Sooner or later I will get what I want, and he will take me where I want to be. Remember that passage from the bible Ask and you shall receive? If you don't ask, God will assume you're alright and will pass by you without moving a finger, and then you will think he has forgotten you.

It's even more complicated than that, it's not as simple as saying God help me or having faith in him. You must really want it, have a burning desire and be doing your best every single day towards your dreams or goals for him to hear you and help you. Unfortunately he cannot help you with money issues as this is man's creation, he will be at your side at all times giving you tips, ideas and also illuminating your way up by clarifying your thoughts for a better understanding and reflection.

But who am I to tell you this? I didn't graduate from a university and I am not a pastor, either; I am just a regular guy who lives in East London, United Kingdom, who has been around and experienced good and bad moments in life; but I've managed to keep myself safe from most troubles and now am giving my contribution to society with my writing skills and my musical work.

If it was for my mum and my family, I would be at a university or finished by now. I guess I would be working and being a regular guy as everyone else.

If it was for my friends I would probably be at the back stage, helping, working waiting for a time to shine or to be heard or perhaps on the block drinking, chilling every day.

Instead, I had something in store for myself; I had a plan, a vision. I had a dream, but I couldn't put it all out as I wasn't ready to do things on my own, which led to some frustrations and pain.

I was feeling down for not having the support I needed and didn't look too well. My appearance was the worst of my entire life. I would drink and smoke with friends even thought it wasn't my thing. I would look always sad and talk less.

My spirit wanted to be connected with me for a very long time, but I couldn't get it. I had no knowledge on how to get in touch with myself. It seemed like everything I touched or decided to do would go wrong and all the things I would dream of or imagine would go in the complete opposite direction. Some call it bad luck, I call it failure.

I failed myself and no one could help me with that; my ideas where too far beyond anyone's reality and my aims were also out of reach. So I cried and then backed down for a better reflection.

While I was stuck thinking of what and how to do, I felt my energy growing; it's like the more I kept on failing, the more powerful and stronger I would become. It's a rare thing as I don't know anyone like that around me. My energy would be at the high peak, but I couldn't control it so therefore I would still feel helpless and far behind the times.

But before you make any conclusions about me, please keep reading to get to know me more so you and I can connect and help each other, if that's ok with you.

CHAPTER 2: CHILDHOOD AND ADULTHOOD

I was only 11 years old living in Angola. I was fed up! Life wasn't getting any better living with my mother. I distinctly remember my friends calling me 'Delcio the Priest' as I used to be forced to go to church meetings all the time, instead of playing with friends.

I didn't want to attend church all the time, but I had no choice. I used to live with my mother, my big brother and my two younger brothers.

My mother was very strict. I was rarely allowed to go out. My responsibilities were to look after my two younger brothers. In the evenings, I would ask to go out; however, deep down I knew the answer that I was going to receive, was going to be a No.

Sometimes it would feel good with my eyes open, imagining springtime in the field, the fresh scents of the trees, the birds chirping, and the warmth off the sun.

I would sit down on the ground and