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    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887
    Ebook95 pages49 minutes

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887

    By Various Various and F. C. (Francis Cowley) Burnand

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    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 27, 2013
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887

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      Book preview

      Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887 - Various Various

      The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93,

      November 19, 1887, by Various

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org

      Title: Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 93, November 19, 1887

      Author: Various

      Editor: Sir Francis Burnand

      Release Date: February 21, 2012 [EBook #38936]

      Language: English

      *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH, OR THE LONDON ***

      Produced by Malcolm Farmer, Wayne Hammond and the Online

      Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net

      PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

      Vol. 93, November 19th 1887

      edited by Sir Francis Burnand

      THE LETTER-BAG OF TOBY, M.P.

      From a Dejected Letter-Writer.

      D-v-nsh-re House, Saturday.

      Dear Toby,

      I daresay you will have been expecting for some time to hear from me, and it is quite true I owe you a letter. But the fact is, I'm sick of letter-writing, which, always a bore, has of late been invested with fresh terrors. The way I am being used up by our Conservative friends is perhaps a little audacious. It certainly is quite embarrassing. Whenever any of their men get into a tight place, or embark upon a difficult enterprise, they write to me for a character, quite regardless of my personal predilections, and even of my actual pledges. You will have seen a good deal of this, including the latest production touching the Aberdeen University Election, where G-sch-n hopes to ride in on my back.

      But that was nothing to the letter they got me to write about the Glasgow University Rectorship. That was, unhappily, not my first production on the subject. Months ago I was asked what I thought of R-s-b-ry as Rector, and I let them have my opinion straight. A better fellow, take him all round, there isn't in either House. Just the man to be Lord Rector of a Scotch University, if he cares to undertake the office. Since then, however, L-tt-n comes along, and with that stupendous ambition for personal distinction which I don't understand, not satisfied with being Ambassador to Paris, wants to be Lord Rector of Glasgow University. Of course they come to me to back him up,—a peculiarly hot corner to put a fellow in. It happens not only that I have published my opinion about R-s-b-ry, but all the world knows what I think of L-tt-n. Still, as the M-rk-ss says, we must keep out Gl-dst-ne from Downing Street; and so we'll put in L-tt-n for Glasgow University. A hard pill to swallow, but I gulped at it, and the letter was written. But between you and me, Toby, I felt nearer being mean than I ever did in my life, and would go a long way round rather than look a Glasgow University lad in the face.

      Still, it is no new experience for me to be persuaded to do things I don't like. I'm swallowing hard pills in the Conservative interest now, but many a box I've cleared out in former days to make things pleasant for Gl-dst-ne. You've seen me, I daresay, reluctantly brought up to the box on the table of the House, patted, pushed, placed in position, and made to support all kinds of things, which a few months or weeks earlier I honestly believe I loathed. As I write I see Gl-dst-ne nodding encouragingly as I proceed. I hear the rapturous cheers of the Radicals, delighted to find me won over. I am conscious of the chilling silence on the benches immediately behind, and I am roused to more desperate declaration by the satirical cheers of my friends on the benches opposite. I recall, as it were but yesterday, the effect H-rc-rt's cheer used to have upon me—the strong temptation to turn round, publicly chuck up the whole business, and go back to the expression of my opinion on the particular topic before Gl-dst-ne took me in

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