Podcast #435
How To Change that Habit that's Keeping You Stuck
 










Do you want to change a habit that is keeping you stuck? This podcast episode is for you. In it, you'll learn why you have had a hard time breaking the habit and how to approach habit change with more confidence, and success. It all starts with getting honest about the habits you need to change, then setting new standards of realistic expectations for yourself, and then mastering the self-talk that will subconsciously get you to show up more consistently for yourself. These changes will make you proud of yourself, and will help you change the quality of your habits and life. 







In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about: 







How to set new standards for yourself in a way that really worksThe key to creating a new self-concept so that you rise up and change your habits naturallyBreaking down the process of habit substitution so that you can really change a habit that's keep you stuck


 
REVIEW OF THE WEEK: 
 





 
WHEW. Let's start with some honesty.
 


Here are some habits that I spent far too many years stuck in.



Compulsive, obsessive calorie counting.



Excessive exercise.



Binge eating. Overeating. Emotional Eating.



Overpouring wine at night.



Slopping nighttime routine.



Mismanaged morning routine.



Stress and busyness.



Workaholism. 



Self-pity and scarcity mindset - life is hard concept.



Settling for relationships and friendships that tore me down instead of building me up. 



Wanting to read my Bible more and do more meditation, but never doing it. 



So much about our habits is a reflection of what's going on in the inside:



-Who do we think we are?



-What do we think of ourselves and our worth?



-What do we do to manage and work through our feelings?



-What are the things we tell ourselves?



-What is it that we actually believe? 


 
NEW STANDARDS
 


Have you considered or ever written down your standards?



What standards do you hold yourself to?



I hadn't done this as an adult - only did it in college on sports teams or classes.



This is different than "Oh, I'm hard on myself because I have high standards for myself"



-that's lazy unrealistic perfectionistic fantasy and day dreaming


 
NEW SELF-CONCEPT
 


You have to see yourself as a new you. 



You are not your habit.



You are not suck.



You are capable of change. 



Create a line in the sand between the old you, and the new you. 


 
To release your old self-concept, and old habits that went with it, you have to forgive yourself for it.
 


-Take ownership and be honest. Call it what it was. (binge drinking, binge eating, compulsive shopping, escapism, etc.)



-Describe the darkness and the state that you created for yourself



-Give thanks for the firsthand experience - experience is the best lesson



-Look at the time wasted as fuel in your fire to maximize all future life opportunities; now more than ever you have a more authentic desire to put life into your years



-Nothing is wasted when you are growth mindset oriented


 
Visualize the self-concept of you that easily executes things at a newer, higher, more confident and masterful level. 
 


-Find examples to emulate



-Refuse to sink in self-pity (or "this is hard" talk)



-Break the ceiling of previous possibilities


 
HABIT SUBSTITUTION
 


Habit replacement. Not elimination.Micro-Habits.Cheer yourself on. Study evidence of people with sustained habits.Change your brain, one thought at a time. 


You can learn how to make your brain work for you, not against you. And that's exactly what I'll be teaching in my upcoming mastermind, Done with Numb.

 
DONE WITH NUMB MASTERMIND
 


READY TO CHANGE HABITS? CHECK OUT MY NEW MASTERMIND:



Applications are open.


 
Who is Done with Numb for?
 


You do more than most people but you never feel like you're doing enough.



You always feel like you should be doing more,