Work

By Cathy Guisewite

A hilarious look at women in the workplace starring one of America’s favorite comic-strip heroines.

“I guess if anything I’ve ever written could cause them to one day remove the fluorescent lights from the swimwear department, then I’ve lived a full life.” —Cathy Guisewite in Biography magazine

Cathy is like a longtime friend who shares the same fears and frustrations as most women: the frightening sight of too-tight swimsuits in a dressing room mirror, the relentless call of the refrigerator, and men who are never quite right.

This book is based on one of Cathy’s most popular subjects: Work. Cathy is a cartoon soul mate, who stresses over the four basic guilt groups. Readers will find comfort, solace, and lots of laughs.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Open Road Integrated Media
• Release date: Feb 5, 2013
• ISBN: 9781449413804

Book preview

Contents

Introduction

The Late ’70s

The Early ’80s

The Late ’80s

The Early ’90s

The Late ’90s

2000 and Beyond

Introduction

Nothing sums up the last quarter century’s explosion of social and technological change in the workforce like the heap of dirty dishes in the office coffee room sink.

It’s all right there.

The enlightenment: I am woman. Wash your own dishes.

The expansion: Filthy dinner plates must not be piled on top of the filthy latte pot and the filthy food processor.

The restructuring: Here’s a 300-page manual on office policy regarding dish washing.

The streamlining: From now on, one filthy mug will be allowed per employee.

The prioritizing: I will wash the mugs, but I’m not touching the microwave platter with Bruce’s breakfast burrito welded to it.

The teamwork: Fred didn’t do the dishes on his day so I’m not doing the dishes on my day.

The sink in the coffee room links who we used to be (people too busy to do the dishes) to who we have become (people too busy to do the dishes).

It links what we dreamed of having then (a multibillion dollar corporation with a staff of people to handle the coffee cups) to what we dream of having now (time to sit down and have a cup of coffee).

It’s the one area where—after 25 years of research, seminars, workshops, training sessions, retreats, and heated legal debate—men and women actually have an equal voice in business: It’s not my turn to do the dishes.

Twenty-five years of evolution is written all over our unwashed mugs.

From thinking of others (Have a Nice Day) to thinking unpleasant things about others (Men Are Pigs) to ordering others (Get a Life) to cheering others (Go Girl!) to affirming we are worthy of others (I Believe in Me) to pleas for contact with others ("Visit me at www.aack.org").

Look on the counter next to the sink and you see a microcosm of where all the time went that we saved with the invention of Wite-Out.

Where there was once a little container of coffee cream there are now 42 options: nondairy creamer; low-fat, fat-free, and/or lactose-free nondairy creamer; hazel-nut, fat-free nondairy creamer; vanilla bean, cholesterol-free low sodium creamer; powdered mocha creamer-like substitute; skim milk, 1 percent milk, 2 percent milk, whole milk, half and half, soy milk, lite soy milk, vanilla soy milk; four types of fake sugar; two kinds of real sugar; and six types of organically harvested honey.

Look at the lineup of coffee makers in a big office and see where all the time went that we saved when Wite-Out got replaced by the self-correcting typewriter.

Regular? Decaf? Espresso? Latte? Mocha latte? Mocha latte decaf? Tea? Herbal? Homeopathic? Yogi? Chinese? Chai? Bag? Leaves? Mulberry? Mango? Lemon Spice? Chamomile? Spearmint? Ginkgo biloba?

Look how we grew.

The classic coffee room guilt-ridden doughnut box (140 calories per doughnut) became the self-righteous giant bagel (400 calories), giant croissant (500 calories), giant fat-free, cranberry-bran muffin (600 calories), and giant chocolate-chip scone (800 calories) platter.

Look at the empty wrappers on the floor: Once there were 25-cent, fabulously satisfying, gooey chocolate vending machine candy bars. Now we have $3.50 mega-protein-boost,