Marriage Commission: What God Has Put Together

By Rev. Dr. Vincent Vasudevan and Rev. Dr. Victoria Nair Vincent

WHO SHOULD READ THIS BOOK
* You have a great marriage and to further enhance it
* You want to be better wife or husband
* You want to learn more of the secrets of this most intriguing relationship
* You have a burden to councel who are going through marital problems
* You want to guide singles planning marriage to understand the true purpose of marriage and how to handle conflicts that come their way
* To assist parents to deal with their troubled children
* To prepare couples for marriages through pre marital counselling
* To help troubled marriages in handling conflicts
*To teach on Drug Awareness and Prevention
* To prepare parents to handle teenaged children
*To train those who are interested in marriage counselling and to facilitate marriage seminars
*You have a lack of excitement in your marriage
*You are not able to communicate well
* Both of you heading in different directions
* you are contemplating to divorce


Endorsed by
General Superintendent Assemblies Of God Malaysia
Bishop of Evangelical Lutheran Church of Malaysia
Past President of Tamil Methodist Church of Malaysia

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing Singapore
• Release date: Jul 27, 2023
• ISBN: 9781543774979

Book preview

Copyright © 2023 by Vasudevan; Vincent.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. [Biblica]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

www.partridgepublishing.com/singapore

Contents

Foreword

Foreword

Acknowledgements

Message from the authors

Testimonies from various church pastors

Introduction

The Family Enrichment Series

About this book

PART 1 ~ MYSTERY OF MARRIAGE

1.1 Why God Designed Marriage

1.2 Fulfilling the Great Commission

1.3 God’s purpose for a family

1.4 Design of oneness

PART 2 ~ WHERE DID FAMILY ORIGINATE?

2.1 The Heavenly Family

2.2 The Earthly Family

2.3 On Earth as It Is in Heaven

PART 3 ~ ROLES OF HUSBAND & WIFE

3.1 Loving Leadership of a Husband

3.2 Effective Submission of a Wife

3.3 Positions the Couple Take

3.4 3D Formula for A Fulfilling Marriage

PART 4 ~ MAJOR FACTORS IN MARRIAGE

4.1 Communication, Sex and Finance

4.2 Let Go and Let God

4.3 Some Sugar and Spice

4.4 Marriage Is a Lifetime of Learning

PART 5 ~ RELATIONSHIP IN MARRIAGE

5.1 Leave, Cleave & Become one

5.2 Four Basic Needs of a Wife

5.3 Four Basic Desires of the Husband

List of References and Recommended Reading

Foreword

THE MARRIAGE COMMISSION ~ WHAT GOD HAS PUT TOGETHER is a must read for married couples and for ministers who have been given the sacred task of preparing members for the divine institution of marriage and family life.

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Bishop Ong Sek Leang

Rev Dr Vincent Vasudevan heads and leads the Marriage and Family Life Commission of the Assemblies of God of Malaysia.

He teaches and writes with great accuracy, passion and wisdom.

The teachings in this book have been timed and culturally tested through many seminars and online teaching platforms in Malaysia and many different parts of the world. I have personally attended some of the online teaching and found them very helpful.

Dr Vincent has given us a definitive framework of God’s intention and design for an intimate, meaningful and lasting marriage and home which is especially crucial today, at a time when liberal and humanistic ideas are rampant within and outside the Church.

This book will bless all who desire to have a great marriage and home whilst grappling with issues and challenges. It will provide godly foundations, bring divine alignment, and enrich the marital couple and home.

THE MARRIAGE COMMISSION ~ WHAT GOD HAS PUT TOGETHER is written by an experienced Pastor Teacher. It will be a great resource for any minister who wishes to enrich and strengthen the marriage and family life of their members.

Get a copy for yourself and for someone else. Immerse yourself in the teaching. You will be greatly blessed.

Rev Ong Sek Leang

General Superintendent

Assemblies of God of Malaysia

Foreword

What God Has Put Together by Rev Dr Vincent Vasudevan and Rev Dr Victoria Nair is a recommended resource for premarital counselling and aid for couples undergoing difficult circumstances or challenges in their marriage. This book is the fruit of their labour and will be a great blessing to all, especially to the Asian churches.

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Rt Rev Steven Lawrence, Bishop of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Malaysia.

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Rev Dr Vincent Vasudevan and Rev Dr Victoria Nair Vincent are a godly, gifted, and down- to-earth couple who teach Biblical marriage and family principles in interesting and practical ways. They have been a great blessing in many of our churches. I heartily recommend their book ‘What God has put together’ to all married couples and young people who desire joyful, purposeful, and meaningful marriages.

Rev P Tevaraji, Past President of Tamil Methodist Church Malaysia.

Acknowledgements

A special appreciation and thanks to the General Superintendent of the Assemblies of God for being our mentor and guide, and for contributing valuable insights in the foreword message of this book. We are thankful to all the denominations for their endorsements on the teachings on family. Special acknowledgements to Dick Iverson (with Elders of Bible Temple, City Bible Publishing, 1979) the author of Principles of Family Life and Selwyn Hughes the author of the Theology and Psychology of Marriage 1994 for much teaching has been taken from these books and seven more books found in the list of references. As participants we have attended more than twenty over FAMILY seminars facilitated by local and mainly overseas speakers twenty-five years ago. We have been equipped by these teachings and had the honour of using all the materials nationally and internationally to build the miniature church called FAMILY Our heat felt gratitude to all those who equipped us with their knowledge and experience which has enabled us to conduct effective FAMILY seminars throughout the nation and abroad including ministering in TV and radio stations and now converting all our experiences to this book which I believe is God ordained. We have read and being blessed by all this books. We have applied these teachings to our own lives and the lives of all church members and friends. We continue to take this teaching to all denominations in Malaysia and abroad as mentioned in this book. All the pastors and ministers who have been blessed has given their testimonies in this book.

Our heartfelt thanks to the students of our family seminars who have contributed messages and testimonies, particularly all ordained licenced ministers of different churches all over Malaysia and India who has participated in all sessions of the marriage and Family Commission sessions of the Marriage and Family Commission series. They have shared their thoughts and experiences and in so doing, they share their blessings to other couples and readers of this book.

Our thanks and appreciation go to Kit Roche of Write-over Works for compiling, designing, and editing this book. And also, thanks to Miss Florance Jothi Angel for the further editing. Through the years of our ministry, we have spent precious time away from our two wonderful sons. Thank you Adrian and Aylwin, for your sacrifices and unwavering support that have made our ministry possible. You are God’s gifts, and you have both honoured us greatly with your love, aspirations, and success.

Message from the authors

It is our great joy and privilege to present this book to you. After many years in the field of marriage and family counselling, we are delighted to share the work of our lives with you. We have spent many years on the road and have journeyed with wonderful people in various congregations by God’s grace, in celebration of love between husbands and wives and within families. During this time, we have been blessed to witness healing of families, broken homes restored, and many marriages saved. Although our journey is far from over, it is time for us to change gears and start equipping younger men and women to continue the physical and practical aspects of this ministry.

One thing remains clear to us – there’s so much to be done! The enemy like a roaring lion, is increasing attacks on families to undermine the earthly expansion of God’s heavenly kingdom.

We see younger people moving aggressively into a culture of consuming, pursuing wealth, increasing dependence on digital services and social media. Families are drifting apart and away from God. According to data gleaned from the Marriage Tribunal in the Malaysian National Registration Department in 2019, on a yearly basis, financial issues come up tops as the reason marriages end in divorce.

Although we are not working with you physically, we ask the Holy Spirit to minister to you as you read our books, with the angels of God seated with you. Whether you are in need of help or whether you are seeking to help someone, we ask you to expect miracles. Our God is a miracle working God – as He has worked miracles in our marriage, he desires to work in yours, to bless you and your family. Of this we are certain and give all praise to our loving heavenly Father!

Sincerely, with our prayers and love

Victoria and Vincent

Testimonies from various

church pastors

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Thank you, Dr Vincent & Dr Victoria, for spending time to minister to us during our problem years. It will always be in both our hearts, remembering the good deeds both of you have done for us. Glory to the highest God.

Kathy Wong, Willie Teh & Family

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My church and I have been so blessed by this family seminar. Many testified that they were taught what they needed in their lives, about loving, trusting each other, trusting wives in finances, the importance of intimacy and sex. Many gave testimonies with tears that all these years they have missed a lot. Young couples made decisions to change their family lifestyle. One Pastor said that after attending this conference he is not fighting with his wife and they are loving each other so much. Rev Prasad, India

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I thank God for His mercy and grace in enabling us to join this marriage course This marriage course was very beneficial to us as a husband and wife, because I identified my weakness and am striving for betterment. I learned that keeping our family happy will definitely contribute to a healthy lifestyle in ministry. We have also benefitted on giving advice for new