To Run with Love

By Timothy Paul Neller

Despite his objections and his reluctance to spend his summer in Mexico, Paul Cooper concedes to his father's wishes to stay for the entire season, knowing that his father has made tremendous sacrifices for Paul in order to make the trip possible. The decision to go comes as a shock to his girlfriend, Caroline, who had been planning to spend the entire summer with him at a summer camp where they were both to serve as counselors. After a painful parting with her, Paul heads to Mexico, and once he arrives, he its determined to make the best of the situation by recruiting the head track coach at the University of Mexico to help him in his long-distance running.However, his efforts to improve lead him on an unexpected trip to the top of Popocatepetl, an ancient volcano, and from there on the road to Copper Canyon and the land of the Raramuri. His experiences with them lead to an unexpected and miraculous transformation in both his body and soul, and with that change begins a journey of romance, deception, and final victory where he finds himself running in the race of his life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jun 10, 2022
• ISBN: 9781639615599

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To Run with Love

Timothy Paul Neller

ISBN 978-1-63961-558-2 (paperback)

ISBN 978-1-63961-560-5 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-1-63961-559-9 (digital)

Copyright © 2022 by Timothy Paul Neller

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

1

The Unwanted Vacation

2

The Reluctant Passenger

3

The Prodigal Daughter

4

Retreat to the Hospital

5

The Wayward Nun

6

Father and Son

7

An Honorable Discharge

8

Departing from Today

9

A Mother in Need

10

The Arrival

11

The Unwelcome Counselor

12

Climbing toward Heaven

13

Listening to an Angel

14

The Raramuri

15

The House of Silence

16

The Nuptial Nightmare

17

The Foreign Bride

18

The Floral Haven

19

A Mother's Rest

20

The First Run

21

Speaking the Truth

22

The Lonely Outrage

23

Unveiling the Darkness

24

The Getaway

25

The One Lost Sheep

26

Another Escape

27

The Awakening

28

The Final Divorce

29

A Bear Escape

30

Pamplona

31

El Encierro

32

The Revelation

Epilogue

About the Author

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings as eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

—Isaiah 40:31 (NIV)

1

The Unwanted Vacation

No, Dad, I'm not going to Mexico this summer! I don't even know the family that you want me to be staying with! And, besides, I've already made my plans for the summer! What in the world were you thinking when you got those plane tickets for me? Paul kicked the baseboard of his bed as he stormed across the room, then swiveled and yelled at his father, You didn't even ask me or tell me anything about it! You just went to World Travel and set everything up without even talking to me about it!

Paul plopped down on his bed and glared at the floor as his father surveyed him with a whimsical expression on his face and replied to Paul in a calm quiet voice, Well, sir, I certainly didn't expect this reaction from you. I wanted to surprise you. Thought it would make a fine birthday present for you. That's why I didn't talk about it. Goodness me, if I thought you were that opposed to it, I never would have done it. Me oh my, you're a wonder you are. I thought you would have been delighted. He tentatively moved toward Paul as he added, Your brother, Eric, had a wonderful time last year when he stayed with the Zavalas, so I thought it would be a real treat for you as well. I certainly never expected this reaction.

Paul pivoted his whole body toward his father as he pouted. Well, I'm not Eric. And just because he had a good time doesn't mean that I would. Seeing the concerned look on his father's face and suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed that he had been yelling at him, Paul took in a deep breath of air and exhaled forcefully as he shifted his body on the mattress. With a long deep sigh, he said, I'm sorry, Dad, I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I'm really sorry. It's just that I had my whole summer planned, and now with this, none of that is going to happen.

Seeing that his son had calmed down, Tod Cooper moved to the end of the bed and sat down next to his son as he said, I'm sorry, too, son. You're right. I should have talked to you about it before I got the tickets. They both sat there silently, neither looking at each other as they both seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. The warm humid air in Paul's bedroom was lifted momentarily by a gust of cool air that rushed in from the park across the street while the steady hum of traffic filtered through the open screened windows. Turning his head toward his son, he asked, So, tell me, what were your plans, anyway? Is there no way you can do them, even if you are in Mexico?

Paul straightened his back and gazed out the window as he answered, No, not really. I was planning on going to Turner's Gym for three months and trying to add some bulk to my frame. I'm really way too skinny, Dad, and word is that Turner's Gym is the place to go if you're serious about weight training. They say that George Turner is the best when it comes to getting a guy stronger and more athletic. Paul became more animated as he began to ramble on about joining the gym, I'm not doing it for looks, Dad. I'm doing it because Coach Waters told me he thought it would really help me in my cross-country running at Westminster next year. Said he thought the extra muscle would help me be a better runner.

Paul's father sat still for a moment, then replied, Well, don't you think that maybe you could lift weights in Mexico? I'm sure that they have a gym somewhere in that city, don't you think?

Paul mused as he traced his finger on the pattern of his bedspread and absently replied, Yeah, I guess you're right, Dad, there probably is. But it wouldn't be the same. And there's other stuff too. Paul remained silent as he hung his head down and again stared at the floor.

His desire to offer no further explanation prompted his father to slide closer to him and ask, Does it have anything to do with that young girl, Caroline, that you met last summer?

A bit stunned that his father would ask him about Caroline, Paul immediately felt defensive, but before he could reply, his father added, I'm sorry. That was really inappropriate for me to ask. He paused for a moment, then rose from the bed as he continued, It's just that, well, I know you've been writing to her a lot this past year and have even had the chance to see her on several occasions these past few months. So I just thought…well, you know.

Paul fidgeted a bit as his dad stood at the foot of the bed, staring at him. He had no idea that his father was aware of his attraction toward Caroline. He rarely mentioned her name and never discussed his personal feelings toward her. And yet, somehow, his father seemed to be completely aware of his fascination and his desire to spend every spare minute he had with her. It was almost as if his father could read his mind.

Realizing that it would be senseless to pretend that he had no feelings for her, Paul surprised himself when he blurted out in a flurry of words, I was so looking forward to seeing her this summer, Dad. We were both planning on being counselors at the YMCA camp at Sunnen Lake, and that way, we could be together every day. It would be so great! I never get to see her much during the year since she goes to Nerinx Hall way out there in Webster Groves. Plus, her parents really don't want her to have anything to do with me, you know. I mean, we're so poor and all.

Poor? What do you mean, poor? exclaimed his father. Since when did you consider us to be poor?

Not me, Dad. Them. They consider us poor, responded Paul. We're not in their social circle, if you know what I mean. We're beneath them. They consider us poor.

Feeling himself a bit agitated, his father began to pace across the floor as he said, Well, if that is how they feel, I don't see why you want to go out with their daughter anyway. Seems like it wouldn't be a good match to begin with right from the start.

It's not her, Dad. It's them, replied Paul. She's not anything like that. That's one of the things I admire about her the most. She thinks for herself and isn't concerned about the way that her parents think. She isn't like them at all.

Paul's father stared at his son as he spoke, then in a calm deliberate voice, he replied, Hmmm. Well, I'm not so sure that is a good thing. Maybe she's just spending time with you because she knows that her parents don't like it. Did you ever think about that? You might just be forbidden territory, and that is all the more reason for her to spend time with you. Shifting his gaze directly at his son and stepping up to him, his father added, Look, I'm not saying that this girl is not sincere and that she doesn't have feelings for you. And, although I know I'm biased because I'm your father and think that every girl would be delighted if they could be with you, I still want you to think about the possibility of her wanting to spend time with you just because it's something her parents don't want. You have to consider that.

Paul's brow furrowed, and his eyes narrowed as he glanced back at his dad and scrapped his feet on the floor. He knew that his dad was right, but it was not something he had not considered himself. When he was not with Caroline and thought about the social circle that surrounded her and her family, he felt completely out of place. He knew they didn't match and that the two of them lived in two completely different worlds. But when the two of them were together, the disparity between their two different realms seemed to disappear. From the very first day he had met her, it seemed as if they belonged together. He shook his head as he said, Well, Dad. I don't really want to talk about it anymore. Since it's all set, and I'm going whether I want to or not, I might as well stop feeling sorry for myself and make the best of it. I'm sure it will all work out just fine. He got up from the bed, moved over to his father, and gave him a brief hug as he added, Thanks, Dad. I know it'll be a good thing once I get down there. Sorry I got so mad at first.

His father patted him on the back and responded, You're welcome, son. And don't feel bad about getting so upset. I understand. I never really thought about how you might be making other plans for the summer. Just makes me realize that you're not a little boy anymore and that I've got to talk to you more. You're a young man now, and before you know it, you are going to be out and about and living out your dreams. He rubbed his hands together and shifted his gaze out the window as he murmured, Makes me feel kind of old seeing you grow up so fast.

Paul grinned at his father and nudged him on the shoulder as he responded, Ha, Dad. You're not getting older. You're still in the prime of your life. You're just adding years, that's all.

They both laughed, and Paul's father smiled broadly as he stepped back from his son and moved toward the door of his bedroom. Thanks, son. I'm glad you see me that way. Exiting through the doorway, he suddenly shifted around and looked at him one more time as he said, I'm proud of you, son. And I know that you will have a good time in Mexico once you get down there. I'm sure of it.

His father then turned slowly about and headed down the hallway as Paul answered, I'm sure I will, Dad. Thanks. Paul could hear his father's footsteps echoing on the hardwood floor and fading away as he disappeared and left Paul standing alone in the middle of his room. Paul was glad that his father had left in good spirits and that he believed that all would go well on the vacation he had planned for him. In his father's eyes. it was a wonderful opportunity and a perfect birthday gift; but in Paul's eyes, it was more like being sent to a detention center for three months.

It was true that he had many fond memories of Mexico and had enjoyed the many times they had been there, living with the Sanchez Castellano family, but he was not looking forward to meeting with another group of complete strangers. It was probably because of the warm accolades that Eric had expressed when he returned from his trip last summer that prompted his father to make similar plans for Paul. And Paul knew it was too late to change anything. He was sure that his father had already sent the Zavalas the money needed to accommodate him, and he was also sure that the airplane tickets he had bought from World Travel had been purchased with a special discount and were nonrefundable. So he was stuck, and as he had said to his father, he might as well make the best of it.

He knew that the family he was visiting would do everything possible to make his time spent with them enjoyable, but that was not his biggest concern. What bothered him the most was not getting to spend the summer with Caroline. They both had been excited about working together at the Y as counselors. His father did not know it, but for the past two months, Paul had ridden his bike every Saturday all the way out to Webster Groves and met Caroline at Blackburn Park. Laying a homemade quilt on the soft green grass, they would enjoy a picnic feast that Caroline had prepared and talk about their plans for the future. Contrary to her parents' wishes, Caroline was determined to become an elementary school teacher. They felt such a position was beneath her and a complete waste of her time, intelligence, and talents. It was a job for common folk like Paul.

Paul, on the other hand, had much different plans. For as long back as he could remember, he had always wanted to have a lot of money. He had seen how his father had struggled and worked to put food on the table for his family, and the load that he had carried over the years had taken its toll on his health and body. Although he was only sixty-five years old, he moved with effort as his worn joints and muscles shouted with pain and made it difficult for him to sleep. His face and eyes, too, showed the weariness of a lifetime of toil. His leathered deeply wrinkled skin and the hollowness of his eyes almost made him look like a cadaver. Growing up and observing how hard he had to work made Paul resolve at a very early age that he would not follow the same plight as his father.

He was especially inspired by his Uncle Mike who was the CEO of a large corporation in Chicago and had retired at the age of fifty with thirty million dollars in the bank. He had married when he was forty to a beautiful heiress of a wealthy suburban family, and they were the proud parents of two children who had gone only to private schools and were now students at Yale and Harvard. Paul had resolved that, someday, he would be just like his Uncle Mike and that by the age of fifty, he too wanted to be able to retire and do many of the things that his Uncle Mike did, like establishing a foundation for families in need of financial assistance and for animals that needed good homes. In addition to that, his uncle and his wife were involved in many community charities, and on more than one occasion, many of Mike's friends had urged him to run for political office. So Paul knew one thing, and that was that one day, he was going to be very, very rich, just like his Uncle Mike.

This is so ironic, thought Paul. My dad has scrimped and saved every day of his life. He never throws anything away, and we don't even have a phone or a TV because he says they are unnecessary expenses. We don't ever go to the doctor or a hospital because he says they are a waste of money, and he takes the bus to work rather than the car because he says it is a lot cheaper. He saves money every way he can, but when it comes to us, his kids, it's different. Here I am, going to Mexico and spending the entire summer there. I know that it costs a lot of money for him to do that, and yet, somehow, he manages and tells us that it is worth it. He tells us that we are his greatest treasure. He is absolutely amazing.

Paul sat down at his desk and rifled through his drawer to find the poem that he had written for Caroline. It was Saturday, and he was going to go on his typical ride to meet her at Blackburn, and it was more important now than ever that she should read what he had written. He knew that she would be disappointed when she heard that they would not be able to spend the summer working together, and he was hoping that his poem would alleviate some of the sadness he knew she would feel. The excitement of seeing her was mixed with frustration as he realized that this would be the last time that he would see her for the whole summer. The very idea of that troubled him, for he knew that Caroline's parents were constantly attempting to match her up with one of the rich boys that lived in their neighborhood.

Although she had many suitors, there was one boy in particular who found favor with her parents, and they did everything they could to bring the two together. His name was Dale Porter, and he was tall, handsome, and athletic. He was also a member of the National Honor Society and participated on a regular basis in activities sponsored by the United Way and his church. In her parents' eyes, he was the perfect match, and Paul knew that when he was in Mexico, her parents would do everything they could to get them together as often as possible.

Finding the poem, Paul tossed it into his backpack, put on his Adidas running shoes, and headed down the hall as he shouted aloud, Hey, Dad, I'm heading out on my bike and will be gone for most of the day. But I'll be back before the sun goes down. See you later!

He then headed out the door as he could faintly hear his father's reply, Be careful now, and God be with you. Paul adjusted the backpack on his shoulders, then grabbed his bike and walked it down the steps as he looked up at the clear blue cloudless sky. It was a cool spring morning, much cooler than usual for the first week in June, and all the trees were now in full bud as new leaves emerged from the unusually cold winter that they had just gone through. Paul loved the bright fresh green color that was unique to spring, and he was especially impressed by the number of flowers that were blooming all over on the lawns surrounding his house. He himself had planted six dozen tulip bulbs in a bed next to the front steps, and he could not help but smile as he looked down at the brilliant shades of orange, red, yellow, white, and gold that bobbed about in the gentle breeze that carried the fragrant scent of the pristine blossoms.

Jumping on the seat of his ten-speed, he began to pedal hard as he anticipated the time that he would be spending with Caroline. He normally met her at 11:00, and he had left his house a bit later than usual and didn't want to make her wait. He usually rode on Arsenal Street until he got to Big Bend and then weaved his way to Lockwood and then to Edgar Road. It was a safer ride with a lot less traffic, and the scenery was better too. The neighborhoods were quiet and picturesque, and Paul was always amused by the number of people he would see outside their homes, scrubbing their front steps on their hands and knees as they rambled off a German song. But today, he was behind schedule, so he decided to take Chippewa instead. It was a lot busier since it was also the city route for Highway 66, but it was a lot faster, too, and he knew that if he went that way, he could make it to Blackburn before 11:00 without any problem.

He pushed hard on the pedals as he began to zoom past the parked cars and weaved his way through the traffic. He was able to keep a steady pace at twenty-five miles per hour, and it felt good to pump his legs rapidly as the cool wind brushed his face and tousled through his long brown hair. He had mastered the art of darting in between rows of cars and tailing motorists who were driving slowly. Their cars acted as a windbreak, and they made it easier for him to pedal as he was sucked into the draft of the cars in front of him. But he also had to be extra careful since he knew that motorists rarely paid attention to him.

It was almost as if he were invisible, and as he made his way down Kingshighway, he could recall the dozens of times he had been forced to veer his bicycle onto the sidewalk to avoid being struck by a car that swerved in front of him as if he weren't even there. He was also amazed by the rudeness of other drivers who would blast their horns at him while other drivers would roll down their windows as they screamed at him to get off the street. In spite of all that, Paul still enjoyed his bike rides to Blackburn, and it was with heightened excitement that he increased his speed as he made his turn off Kingshighway and onto Chippewa for the final leg of his journey.

In spite of the hectic traffic that surrounded him, Paul always found the ride to Blackburn almost meditative. Everything around him almost seemed to disappear as he pressed forward and glided along the smooth black asphalt of the four-lane highway. All of the frenetic commotion of the city—the barking dogs, the honking horns, the humming of rubber tires, the roaring of the car engines, and the blaring sirens of the ambulance or fire truck. In fact, every sight and sound seemed to dissolve into oblivion as Paul paced himself on his bike and breathed deeply as he forged ahead and made his way ever closer to being with Caroline.

He was only a half mile from his final turn on Edgar Road when the unthinkable happened. A brown UPS truck that was waiting to pull out from a parking lot suddenly squirted from its stationary position and darted directly across the road. It veered sharply for a moment and then swung sharply into Paul's lane as the driver seemed to be attempting to regain control of the sliding vehicle. The erratic and spastic swaying of the large van caused a Volkswagen in the oncoming lane to lose control and smash directly into Paul's bike. The horrific impact of the small car into Paul's bike crushed the front rubber tire and spokes and sent Paul hurling through the air as if he had been thrown by a catapult. How long or how far he sailed through the air he did not know, but in that brief moment, the faces of friends and family flashed before him, and then there was total darkness.

*****

When light once again finally appeared, he found himself lying on his back and staring straight up at the faces of two men in blue uniforms. One of them was bending directly over him, and when Paul opened his eyes, he said, Hey there, partner, welcome back to the real world. We didn't know how long it was going to be before you decided to touch base with earth again. How you feelin'?

Who are you? Paul asked. Where am I?

The man smiled as he answered, You're in an ambulance, and we're heading toward St. Anthony's to check you out. You had one heck of an accident back there.

What? Paul wondered, and then all of it seemed to suddenly come back to him. He could remember everything: the sliding van, the Volkswagen, and sailing into the sky. After that, everything was blank. What happened? How did I get here?

The other man standing over him bent down and said, Well, to tell you the truth, young man, you are actually kind of a miracle. As he spoke, he applied a blood pressure cuff to Paul's arm and stuck a thermometer in his mouth as he said, Yes, sir, in most cases, you would have been dead, hard as that bug hit you. But some way or another, you were flying so hard and so fast that you popped onto the top of that UPS truck and slid all the way on the top of it till you landed onto its cab. That's where you rested till the van stopped and we got you. But you got quite a wallop on your head when you first hit, and that's why you were knocked out. We don't know how bad you were hit, but the fact that you are talking to us now so soon after the crash is a good thing. But we won't really know anything for sure until we get you to the hospital.

Paul lay there silently, taking in all that the man had said and thinking about how easily he could have been killed. He then thought about Caroline and knew that she was probably still at the park waiting for him and that he had to get up and leave so that he could tell her that he was all right. He sat up and stared at the man as he said, Hey, I need to go. I've got someone waiting for me at the park, and I've got to tell her that I'm all right.

The attendant gently placed his hand on Paul's shoulder as he said, Hold it now, partner, you're not going anywhere. You have to just take it easy and not move. We don't know if anything is broken inside or out, so you just have to stay very still and not move around. You got that?

But Caroline is waiting for me, and I've got to let her know what's happening. She'll start worrying if I don't show up. Paul jerked upward and attempted to jump off the cot and make his way out the door as he said, Look, you gotta let me go. I'm okay. See? I'm moving fine. Just show me where my bike is, and I'll get on it and be on my way, no problem.

The attendant held Paul much more firmly and said in a loud forceful tone, Son, I'm serious now. We can't have you moving around like that. Now just sit still or we'll have to strap you down and give you a shot. He lifted Paul as if he were a baby and placed him solidly on the cot as he held him down and added, You're not going anywhere right now. So just take it easy. He smiled slightly as he continued, Plus, sorry to be the one to tell you, but you're going to have to forget about your bike. It's all bent up like an accordion and is headed for nowhere but the trash dump. He shook his head as he stared at Paul and said, You just don't know how lucky you are, do you? Anybody who saw that bike and the shape that it is in would have thought that the rider would be splattered on the road like a squashed watermelon. Like I told you before, it is a miracle that you ended up like you did—just a big bump on the head. Nodding his toward Paul, he then turned his eyes upward as he said, Somebody up there likes you.

Acknowledging his comment, Paul sighed heavily with a sullen resignation and shifted his head and sank it heavily onto the pillow. In a quiet steady voice. he said, Okay, I know what you are saying makes sense, so I won't try to get up. But is there any way that you guys can contact her and tell her that I'm okay and that I won't be able to meet her today?

Both men nodded their heads, and the one standing asked, What is her name. and how do I get in touch with her?

Her name is Caroline Woodard, and she's waiting for me at Blackburn Park. She's an eighteen-year-old girl with blonde hair, blue eyes, and she is really pretty. Looks a lot like Julie Christie, only slimmer and taller. She'll be sitting on top of a quilt with a picnic basket.

Sounds like she'll be easy to find. We'll send out a dispatch right now and make sure she knows what's going on. The man wrote some notes down on a pad before he asked, What about your folks? How do we get in touch with them?

Paul then gave him the information that he needed to contact his father, then rested his head softly on the pillow as he thought about how quickly everything had changed in the last twenty-four hours. It almost seemed like a nightmare. He closed his eyes and hoped that when he opened them. he would suddenly wake up and find out that he was staying in St. Louis for the summer and would get to spend every day with Caroline. just as he had planned. He kept them closed for several minutes as the ambulance took off and headed for the hospital, its sirens blaring.

The sound blocked out the conversation of the two men, and the momentum of the car and the droning of the tires suddenly made him very sleepy, and within seconds. Paul fell into a deep restful sleep. He awoke when the two attendants were carrying him into St. Anthony's and joking with one another about how restful the trip seemed to have been for Paul. Opening his eyes wide, he quickly recalled all that had happened that morning and how he had hoped this was all a dream. But as he was whisked through the corridor and rolled onto a bed in a brightly lit white room with no windows. he knew he was not dreaming.

Around him stood several men and women, all dressed in surgical gowns and facial masks. The tallest man standing directly over him said, Hi, Paul, I'm Doctor Ladd. I've been handed your chart here with all the details of your accident, and I was radioed ahead to make sure we were ready for you when you came in. Dr. Ladd softly placed his hand on Paul's chest as he asked, How are you feeling?

Mesmerized by all that was going on around him, Paul answered in a weak soft tone, I'm good, Doc. I feel good. My head hurts a little, but other than that, I feel fine. For extra emphasis, he repeated, Yeah, I feel fine. Nothing really hurting, and I feel like I'm ready to go home.

Paul could tell by the crinkles around his eyes and the tone of his voice that Dr. Ladd was smiling as he responded, Well, that's good to hear. I'm glad to hear that you are feeling fine. But let me tell you, we want to make sure that you really are okay by running a few tests on you, and if they are all negative, then we'll be sending you home as soon as possible. Attempting to clarify what he had just said, Dr. Ladd added, If you have no internal injuries, broken bones, or blood clots, we will be sending you home first thing in the morning.

Paul was a bit confused by that statement and asked, First thing in the morning? But why? If I test out okay, why can't I go home right away?

Again, Dr. Ladd smiled as he responded, Concussions. We have to make sure your head is okay. Whenever a person gets knocked out like you did, the injury to the brain might suddenly flare up, and we want to keep a close eye on you for the first twenty-four hours to make sure you don't have any complications.

For the next several hours, Paul felt himself being probed, prodded, stuck, squeezed, and stretched as he was wheeled from one room to another. The battery of tests that he took were relatively painless, and in spite of the lack of response from those administering the examination, Paul felt that the complacency on their faces and their lack of urgency seemed to indicate that he was indeed free from any serious injury. By midafternoon, he was carted into Room 308, and he sat there silently as the nurse aide wished him a pleasant day before she left him alone in the room.

He sat there silently for what seemed to be almost an hour before Dr. Ladd entered the room abruptly, holding a clipboard in his right hand. The serious expression on his face caught Paul by surprise, and he searched Dr. Ladd's eyes, attempting to discern what might be the cause of his concern. Holding the clipboard solidly in front of him, Dr. Ladd looked directly at Paul and announced, Well, Paul, I'll bet you feel like you have been run through an automatic car wash or something. You doing all right?

Paul nodded his head slightly.

Well, let me tell you all of your tests look good, and you are in really great shape considering what happened to you, but there is a problem, and we have to take care of it right away.

The word problem immediately caught Paul's attention, and he, with rapt interest, looked at Dr. Ladd and watched the movement of his lips as he suddenly felt that he had been dropped into a large black hole.

Dr. Ladd continued in a raspy voice and a dull monotone as he said, The CAT scan shows you have a blood clot right behind your left temple, and we have to remove it so that there aren't any further complications. There has already been some swelling, so we have to get on it right away. We have already set up the room for the operation, and we will be carting you down to surgery in just a few minutes. He squeezed Paul's arm as he said, Don't worry. Paul, we have one of the best brain surgeons in the country right here at St. Anthony, and he is the one who is going to be working on you. He started to walk away, then turned as he added, By the way, your dad and your sister are here waiting to see you before we get started, and I'm going to send them right in to talk to you for a few minutes.

The shock of what Dr. Ladd had just told him was taking some time to sink in. Paul didn't quite understand. He felt fine, and all the results were negative. except for one, and Paul didn't really understand what he meant by a blood clot. He thought that was something like a bruise and didn't think a bruise was that big of a deal. He had lots of bruises before, and no one ever talked about operating on any of them. They just went away on their own. He guessed that brain bruises must be different, so he sat there silently, wondering how all of this was going to affect his going to Mexico. He also wondered what he meant about his sister. Paul didn't have a sister, so who was he talking about? His mind began to whirl about as he tried to think of all that was going on when the door opened. and in walked his father and Caroline.

Seeing them walk in took him out of his preoccupation and immediately relieved him, almost as if he were a wild animal that had just been let out of a cage. He was grateful to see his father, but having Caroline there was like breathing in a lungful of fresh air after being in the middle of a forest fire. He assumed that Caroline was the sister Dr. Ladd had been talking about, and with a sigh of relief, Paul greeted them with a loud, Wow! My dad and my sister! What a surprise!

They both looked at him curiously as he held his arms up over his head as if he were greeting the Catholic Pope, and when Paul began to laugh as they approached his bed, they looked at each other in consternation, wondering if the blow he had received on the top of his head might be the cause of his peculiar behavior.

Seeing the confusion on their faces, Paul lowered his arms and settled back on his bed as he said, I'm sorry. I guess that was a little too much. Sorry. He grinned sheepishly as he stared directly at Caroline and said, Dr. Ladd said that my dad and sister were coming in, and that left me totally confused. So when I saw that it was you, it just gave me a hoot, and next thing you know, I'm acting like an idiot. He plopped his hands down on the mattress as he sighed. Maybe I got hit harder on the head than I thought. I feel like I'm not making any sense at all.

Caroline and Paul's father said not a word but moved closer to his bed to stand right beside him. That's all right, Paul, no need to try to explain yourself. You've got to remember that you just made it through a terrifying accident in which you could have been killed or crippled. Caroline and I have both commented on how lucky you were to have come out with no more than a big bump on your head.

Standing there quietly, Caroline moved a bit closer as she said, Your dad is right, Paul. We both agree that someone up there must really like you. We are so thankful that you're okay and we're not worried at all about the operation. We know you're going to be just fine, and you will be out of here before you know it.

Paul looked tentatively at his dad and at Caroline as he asked, Sounds like Dr. Ladd told you about the operation.

Paul's father nodded his head.

Sounds pretty gruesome. They're going to remove a blood clot from my head. Is that not crazy or what?

It does sound strange all right, answered his father. But you have to remember the brain is a very delicate organ, and since the skull is hard and only allows a limited amount of space to contain it, any extra pressure at all can cause serious problems. So that's why they are taking out the clot to keep the brain from being pressed on too hard.

Paul smiled politely as his father spoke, then was a bit surprised when Caroline sat down on the foot of his bed and said, When I first heard about what happened, Paul, I was terrified. In my mind, all I could see was you lying here in the hospital and barely alive. I just had all these horrible images in my head. So to see you here in one piece and laughing and talking to us, well, it really is a miracle. She then scooted up further toward him, leaned her head toward his, and whispered, "I love you, Paul. She then stood up and stepped back to his father. Grasping his hand, she said, I'm going to leave now, Mr. Cooper, so you can have a few moments alone with your son. I'll be out in the hall, waiting for you." She then left quietly as Paul's father gazed at her somewhat in a state of disbelief.

He then turned his eyes back toward Paul whose face had turned a bright red. Paul's eyes had widened, and they rolled around the room as if they were having a difficult time focusing on anything in the world around him. Although they had been friends for almost a year now, and she was the first girl he had ever spent much time with, it was still somewhat of a surprise to hear her say those words: I love you. It was as if they were magic, and when she moved next to him and whispered them in his ear, he almost felt as if an angel had sat next to him and made him immortal. There was a warmth that surged through his entire body, and the sensation seemed to lift him high above the ground. He felt as if he were floating and could think of nothing else but her beautiful face; those three words kept echoing in his mind over and over again: I love you.

Hey, champ, you still here with me? Paul's father asked. Paul, are you listening to me?

Paul blinked his eyes, and he suddenly realized that his father had been talking to him as he responded, What? Oh, yeah, yeah, Dad. I'm listening to you. Realizing that he had totally spaced out, he asked, What was it you were saying?

His dad laughed as he answered, Well, that Caroline really is something, isn't she? I can see why you want to spend more time with her. Don't think I've ever met a girl quite like her before. She's what we used to call a ‘Southern Belle' when I was in school. Yes, a real charmer. Then with some slight hesitation, he asked, What was it that she whispered in your ear?

Again, turning red, Paul answered, Oh, nothing, Dad, nothing. She just wished me well in the operation, that's all. Said she'd see me again soon as it was all over. Nothing more than that.

Smiling as he nodded his head, Paul's father said, Well, that was sure nice of her. Yes, she is quite a lady. Then moving closer to his son, he bent over him and stroked his hand over his son's hair and smoothed it back as he said, Now, listen, son, I don't want you to worry none. You are going to be in fine hands, and both Caroline and I and lots of other folks will be praying for you. Everything is going to be all right, and you are going to be just fine. So you don't worry none, hear? And we will be going back home before you know it. You just take it easy. Then, to Paul's utter surprise, his father gave him a light kiss on the top of his head. He then backed up swiftly and turned his head around as he wiped his eyes, hoping that Paul would not see the tears that were welling up and beginning to run down his cheeks.

Paul watched him leave, then lay there silently as he again thought about Caroline and what he would like to say to her when he would see her once again. Now that he was having the operation, he wasn't sure about how long it would be before he could be up and about again and if he would be able to live a normal life once they had removed the blood clot. He didn't even know how long the surgery took or how they would do it. He only knew that it sounded serious, and a dozen questions started to run through his head as the fear of what might happen sent a chill through his veins. He could feel his teeth chattering and a lightness in his head as the room seemed to start spinning around when his thoughts were interrupted by the entrance of Dr. Ladd and two nurses.

Well, Paul, I'm glad you had the chance to have a few moments with your family. We are going to roll you down now to the operating room and get started on fixing you up so you'll be good as new. Noticing Paul's pale visage and the reticent look in his eye, he immediately asked, Are you all right, Paul? How do you feel?

I feel sick to my stomach, Doc. I think I'm going to throw up.

Quickly motioning to the nurses, the one at his side reached by his bedside and grabbed a large metal pan which she placed in front of Paul and leaned him forward. Her quick response to the doctor came none too soon as Paul wretched heavily and heaved a large volume of bitter liquid into the metal pan that she held in front of him. After several violent surges, Paul took in a deep breath, then plopped his body heavily back onto the pillow. The other nurse wiped his mouth as Paul said, Sorry about that, Doc. But I feel better now.

He closed his eyes as Dr. Ladd spoke, Not to worry, Paul. You've got a lot going on right now, and it's not surprising for a person who has had a concussion to get queasy and throw up. Plus, I know you are nervous about the operation. But don't worry. We are going to take the very best care of you, and by this time tomorrow, you are going to feel a lot better. I promise you that.

As they began to take him from the room, Paul looked at Dr. Ladd and asked him, Thanks, Dr. Ladd. If you don't mind my asking, what exactly are you guys going to do to me?

As they made their way down the hall, Dr. Ladd told him, Well, Paul, it's quite simple really. We are going to drill two tiny little holes into your head close to the blood clot so we can let all the evil spirits out. Dr. Ladd retained a solemn expression on his face as they moved on, then burst out laughing as he noted the distraught expression on Paul's face. Just kidding, Paul. I was just joking about the evil spirits. But we are going to drill some very small holes into the skull, and then we will drain out the blood to relieve the pressure. Once that is done, unless there are some complications, you should be back to normal in a few weeks as your body starts to heal. You're young and healthy, so you will be fine.

Paul smiled as he reflected on Dr. Ladd's timing and his strange sense of humor, but he was glad that he had attempted to make him laugh, and suddenly, the pressure of the operation no longer seemed so ominous to him. He closed his eyes and rested his head back on his pillow as they made their way into the operating room, then opened his eyes back up as a large man in light green surgical scrubs peered down at him and said, Okay, young fella, glad you could make it down here so we could start the party. He then attached a new bottle to his IV and adjusted the lever so that a tiny drop of liquid began to run down the tube every few seconds.

As Paul watched the man and his procedure, he heard him say, In a few moments, you are going to feel a bit sleepy. And that was the last thing that Paul could remember.

2

The Reluctant Passenger

As she left the room and entered the hallway, Caroline had an overwhelming urgency to scream. She could not put into words what she was feeling in that moment; it was a mixture of fear and doubt, of joy and sorrow, of love and hate that bandied about in her with such force that she felt the only way could express herself was to release a loud and uncontrolled burst of emotion that would vibrate in the halls and echo throughout the building. But she said not a word. She just stood outside the door for a moment, then impetuously decided that she would not wait for Paul's father but would head home instead. If he were not to find her when she came out, she knew that he would assume that she had left, and at that moment, she had no desire to talk with him or to visit with anyone else for that matter. She felt totally alone.

Her parents had done everything they could to dissuade her from seeing Paul, often referring to him as that common boy and that any time she spent with him was a total waste of time. She never spoke of the times they spent together every weekend in the park, and her friends knew nothing about him, not even her closest friend, Denise.

In a similar manner, Paul never mentioned her to any of his friends, knowing that his talk of her would do nothing more that arouse speculative conversation on how much he was getting from her and what a lucky guy he was to have gotten a girl who lived on the other side of the tracks.

They had known each other for almost a year now, and each day that came seemed to bring each of them closer to one another. It was a relationship unlike any other that Caroline had ever experienced, and she felt herself being drawn ever closer to him as the summer vacation approached. Although her parents suspected that the long conversations she had on the phone were with Paul, they had no idea that the two had been meeting for the past six months at Blackburn Park. Nor did they know that she and Paul were writing letters to each other on a constant basis, something they had done since they first met at Camp Lakewood the previous summer. Caroline always arrived at home hours before her father arrived from work, and the mail arrived in midafternoon when her mother was at the Country Club, playing bridge. As a result, she was able to intercept the letters that Paul wrote to her and pored over them several times before she cached them away in the secret drawer of her jewelry box.

The letters that Paul wrote to her were so romantic and poetic, and they idealized the world and envisioned what their futures would be like if they spent their lives together. Paul was the most intelligent and sensitive boy she had ever met, and in spite of his unabashed attraction toward her, he had never attempted to kiss her nor to suggest that they be anything more than dear friends. Along with the many other admirable traits that Paul possessed, it was his self-control and his reluctance to offend her with any behavior that might be construed as being inappropriate that drew Caroline ever closer to Paul. He had never said that he loved her, but everything he wrote, said, and did indicated to her that she was the most special person in Paul's life. For that alone, she loved him, and she longed for the day that she would hear him say those three words: I love you.

Yet, in spite of all that, Caroline surprised herself when she had squeezed Paul's hand that afternoon and whispered those three words in his ear. It was not that she didn't mean them nor was she ashamed nor embarrassed by the timing or the circumstances. It seemed to come out of her mouth as smoothly and readily as her heart did beat, and she realized at that very moment that it was indeed from her heart that those words did come. She had to say them. Her love for him was as natural as her breathing, and he had to know what she felt deep inside of her.

She smiled as she recollected the expression on Paul's face when she backed up from the bed and looked at him one last time before she left. It was not a look of surprise but more of reciprocation. The peace in his eyes and the warmth of his smile told her that he loved her, too, and with that look, she left him, praying silently that all would go well during the operation.

She knew from experience that nothing could be taken for granted, that any operation, no matter how minor it seemed to be, could have disastrous consequences. Her memory flew back to her teammate, Jessica, with whom she had played soccer since she was eight years old. Jessica was a lightning-fast forward and was the leading striker in the whole state. She was an all-star player who was being recruited by several Ivy League colleges, but she had chosen to commit herself to playing for the North Carolina Tar Heels, a team that had renowned itself by winning every national championship for the past ten years. But Jessica's plans were thwarted when she received a devastating injury to her right knee after suffering a brutal tackle during the state finals. Two of her ligaments had been ripped and pulled off the bone while two others were severely strained. Yet, in spite of her prognosis that she would never play soccer again, Jessica was sure that she would heal completely and that she would be a threatening force once again after the surgeons had done their job and she went through her rehabilitation program. She was determined that no matter how bad the injury had been, she had the courage, stamina, strength, determination, and ability to overcome any setback, no matter how severe it might seem to the medical field.

But it was not to be. During her operation, Jessica stopped breathing, and in spite of repeated attempts to revive her, there was no response. Jessica died that day after being only twenty minutes on the operating table. All who knew her were in shock. It was a standard operation that followed all the guidelines and procedures that the doctors had practiced hundreds of times before. There were numerous conjectures on what went wrong. There was strong speculation among the doctors that it was caused by an unexpected allergic response to the anesthesia she had been given. Her devastated parents filed a lawsuit against the hospital and the individual doctors, citing malpractice and negligence of duty. No matter what the cause, it didn't really matter. Jessica was dead.

And it was for that reason that Caroline left the hospital and began walking away as quickly as she could as he made her way back home. It was a long walk, almost ten miles, but Caroline didn't care. She wanted time to process all that had happened and to formulate what she and Paul might do once he was back home. She also needed time to settle down. In their brief interlude in the hallway, her father had mentioned that he had intended for Paul to go to Mexico. That news had startled her and made her question why Paul had not said something about it. There was no way for her to know that it was news to Paul, too, and that his frustration was as great as hers or that he had written a poem for her that he had been unable to deliver because of the accident. So the bevy of emotions that Caroline continued to harbor had no rest, and it was with the utmost turmoil that she made her way down Gravois Avenue and headed toward her home in Webster Groves.

She had walked briskly for more than a mile when a car horn blared behind her, and a red and white Thunderbird convertible eased against the curb and stopped when it was about ten feet in front of her. The driver turned his head toward her and smiled as he shouted, Hey, good-looking, what are you doing in this neck of the woods? It was Dale Porter.

Surprised to see Dale and a bit perturbed that he had interrupted her thoughts as she made her trip home, she stared at him intently as she curtly answered, I'm just taking a long walk to get some exercise and am on my way back home.

She then began to resume her walk but stopped abruptly when Dale honked his horn and yelled, Hey, what's up with that? You mad at me or something? I think I deserve a little bit more courtesy than that, Caroline.

Caroline stood there like a statue, not wanting to turn and face him but realizing that he was right and that she should not have spoken to him in such a rude manner. Trying to calm herself, she forced a smile on her face and stepped a few steps toward him as she answered, You're right, Dale. It wasn't right for me to act like that.

Dale smiled at her in return and leaned forward in his seat as she continued.

It's just that…well, a lot has happened today, and it has left me feeling a bit unsettled. I'm anxious for a friend that I just left in the hospital, and I am so worried about him.

The minute Caroline said that, she wished she had kept her mouth shut. She pursed her face and avoided looking at Dale as he asked, Oh, gosh, I'm sorry to hear that. Anybody I know?

Attempting to avoid any further discussion on the subject, Caroline quickly replied by saying, Oh, no, no. Nobody you would know. Just a friend. Then trying to divert his attention, anticipating his reaction, she added, You know, I'm actually getting kind of tired, and I'm glad you happened to come along. Would it bother you too much if I changed my mind and got in your car so you could give me a ride home?

A bit taken aback by her request, Dale's face beamed as he responded, What? You kidding? I'd be delighted. Hop in.

Caroline made her way to the passenger's side, opened the door, and slid onto the red leather seat and stared straight ahead, again attempting to avoid any eye contact with Dale. Dale scanned the street and peered into his mirrors before making a rapid entrance back onto the street and into the traffic.

Not wanting to seem distant but at the same time wanting to avoid a conversation, Caroline asked, Would it be all right with you if we listened to the radio?

Attempting to do all that he could to please her, Dale answered, Sure, little lady. Anything you ask. Any particular station you like?

Caroline seldom listened to the radio, so she was unsure of how to respond. She suddenly thought of her grandmother and how she always sat in her rocking chair every afternoon and listened to the radio as she was crocheting. With a slight smile, she replied, WIL would be nice, knowing that her