Ryan's Rainbows

By Kymberleigh Ryan

This publication of poems is the heartbreak and pain that comes from the inner depths of the soul of any parent who has lost a child, particularly to suicide or, in this case, military suicide. The painful truth is that twenty-two veterans a day commit suicide (twenty-two too many). This chronicles the complicated grief long after the loss of a loved one, one mother's journey written through poems of the pain and grief long after losing her twenty-three-year-old son to suicide while on active duty, and the endless search for answers and the emptiness that follow.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Newman Springs Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jun 10, 2022
• ISBN: 9781638817130

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Ryan’s Rainbows

Kymberleigh Ryan

Copyright © 2022 Kymberleigh Ryan

All rights reserved

First Edition

NEWMAN SPRINGS PUBLISHING

320 Broad Street

Red Bank, NJ 07701

First originally published by Newman Springs Publishing 2022

Cover photo by Steven Medina

ISBN 978-1-63881-712-3 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-1-63881-713-0 (Digital)

Printed in the United States of America

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To my precious son, Spc. Ryan N. Kettell, MP Army

Sunrise: December 23, 1994

Sunset: June 9, 2018

My son may have died, but my love and motherhood never will.

Death changes everything

Time changes nothing

I still miss the sound of your voice

The wisdom of your advice

The stories of your presence

So…no!

Time changes nothing

I miss you just as much today as I did the day you died

I just miss you

All my love, my little man

Still having a hard time, Ry Boy

My sweet Ryan,

I loved you before we first met

I carried you for nine months in a very protective net

The moment I held you, love flooded through

I vowed then that my love would be forever true

I will protect and defend you

Even if it meant my end

I would take away all of your pain

Just to keep you from its chain

The joy you’ve brought

Cannot be learned or taught

Watching you grow

Always made me glow

Your sheer accomplishments

Has brought me numerous compliments

I would sell my soul

If it would keep you eternally happy

I would give my arm to keep us from being apart

I will guide you through life

As we know that this world can be quite evil

So…

Just don’t ever forget

That you will always be my child

R-Y-A-N

I am someone

Remember me

I am Ryan

Please don’t forget about me

I am a son, a brother, an uncle, cousin, and friend

I am someone

Remember me

This wasn’t supposed to happen

But…my brain was