Don't You Dare Shut Up: A Collection of Poems

By Lydia Hart

Starting from a place called "Small," the reader is invited to accompany the author on her journey of finding her voice and discovering that she was bigger, braver, and tougher than she ever believed.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Jun 8, 2018
• ISBN: 9781543934038

Book preview

Don’t You Dare Shut Up

A Collection of Poems

Lydia Hart

ISBN (Print Edition): 978-1-54393-402-1

ISBN (eBook Edition): 978-1-54393-403-8

© 2018. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

To all the voices who told me to speak up.

For all the hearts that need to hear the same.

Table of Contents

INTRODUCTION

SMALL

DREAMER

CHRONIC

SHADOWS

PARTINGS

WHISPER

ACHE

SEEN

AWAKE

LIGHT

INTRODUCTION

Some of my earliest memories are of hiding. I can close my eyes and see every time I made myself small. Hide and seek, when I curled up in the drying machine and got in trouble for it. The little clubhouse in the basement that my brother and I made, and would kick each other out of. The desk I would hide under when I wanted to cry. The pain in my hands that I hid for years, until the disease had spread until it could be termed ‘chronic.’

I had thought that no one would believe me. I had sometimes ceased to believe myself. I was wrong. People were supportive, yes, but more strikingly, it mattered to them. It took months for the diagnosis to be made. I’ll never forget … the week I graduated from high school was the week I found out. I was sixteen.

Mere months after I had first shared my pain with my family, I started writing. I had written stories as a child, but this time around, the words were real, raw, and my own. I refused to hide. I had found my voice, and would no longer settle for silence or smallness.

Because, dear reader, when you make yourself out to be anything less than you are, you spare no one. Rather, you cheat the world. We cannot afford to miss the mysteries you have within you. So, my hope is this. May these words be wind for your sails. May they be a hand up out of hiding. And may they be a voice that sets off a choir.

SMALL

I was a girl grown scared

And there are still days

Where it feels as though

I am still hiding

The Bleak Nothing

I closed my eyes

And only saw

White walls

Tired self

Curled up on the floor

Saw no future

And no escape

Lonely

Felt so small

Banging on the walls

Needed color

Desperate for hope

I stood

Rolled up sleeves

Braced myself to make

Color out of

The bleak nothing

I knew

That I could

If I believed, in the beauty

Without seeing

In the freedom

While I

Remained caged

I thought it had to be me

Who pulled myself

Out of darkness

No one

Else had come

But one day, I realized

There was a voice

Who had told me,

Stand up

On that day

When I swore I was alone

Who’d given me

The strength to rise

Courage

To see light

And make color out of the bleak nothing

Ancient Child

There lives a girl inside my mind

Her face fragile, yet worn

She cried tears for a thousand years

And cannot cry one more

She sits stone-still upon a floor

Its boards scarred from her fists

She sat until the boo-boos healed

But they’ve not yet been kissed

A window watches over her

Because no one else will

Her fingers have caressed its frame

She’s wept upon its sill

There is a world behind her eyes

Like man has never known

I join her there on dismal days

When we both feel alone

We dance and sing until it seems

We’ve been at it for weeks

‘Til suddenly she pulls me close

And rocks me off to sleep

O ancient child with heart so strong

You know I cannot stay

I have a world that’s made of dust

Where days are simply days

You sent me home to Mama’s arms

And Sister’s laughing smile

Knowing that if I’m e’er alone

I’ll visit you awhile

She and I

She finishes a book

While I complete a sketch

She smiles wide

While I grin soft

Her laugh begets mine

As our souls intertwine

Over cocoa and tea

In this haven divine

She makes her music

And I harmonize

As a strange liquid poetry

Falls from our eyes

She captures a picture

As I read my book

She plays all the songs