Emotional Pain Versus Suicide

By m.kukreja

     How do you turn a man broken by emotional pain into a calm, confident, and cheerful person? This book presents the three stages of recovery leading to healing, rebuilding, and strengthening.

     Emotional pain can be worse than physical pain. It can destroy careers and families and lead to suicide. This is why the second half of this book is focused on suicide. The author asks, "Where do you go AFTER suicide? Whom do you meet?

     Some healing programs for emotional pain, the S.T.O.P. and the Seven Step Program, have been presented. The despondent reader is encouraged to go through a "Pre-Suicide Program" before making any final decision.

      Some new terms have been introduced, "The pulse of family life, Emotional Blindness, and Emotional Boundary."

       The author has been a physician for over forty years and has practiced on both sides of the Atlantic Ocean.

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: m.kukreja
• Release date: Jul 7, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215785492

Book preview

EMOTIONAL PAIN

VERSUS

SUICIDE

&

(EMOTIONAL BLINDNESS)

BY

M. Kukreja, M.D.

EMOTIONAL PAIN

VERSUS

SUICIDE

&

(EMOTIONAL BLINDNESS)

By

M. Kukreja, M.D.

COPYRIGHT © 2022

ISBN# 9798223022770

Please note that this book only uses the word he for convenience. Everything applies equally, as far as possible, to men and women.

THINK ABOUT THIS

If someone has rejected you, why are you rejecting yourself?

If others have caused you pain, why are you causing pain to yourself?

If others are causing you pain, how can they be considered yours?

For a change, love yourself as much as you love another.

Any decision based on pain, other than abuse, must be given some time and discussed with another person before being carried out.

Emotional blindness leads to emotional pain.

Knowing your fifteen selves is essential before you leave this world.

Feeling sorry for yourself loses the enthusiasm for life.

No matter what another person has done for you, it does not mean you have to live where and how he wants you to.

Depression is not a disease. It is an emotion. Medications can only suppress it. Read how to control emotions.

CONTENTS

PREFACE

PART 1: THE ACUTE PAIN

CHAPTER 1: A LETTER TO YOU

CHAPTER 2: BUTTERFLIES

CHAPTER 3: YOU HAVE TWO LIVES

PART 2: THE RECOVERY FROM ACUTE PAIN

CHAPTER 4: THE S.T.O.P. PROGRAM

CHAPTER 5: THE SEVEN-STEP PROGRAM

CHAPTER 6: RECOVER/PRE-SUICIDE: THE 3 STAGES

CHAPTER 7: RECOVER/PRE-SUICIDE 1

CHAPTER 8: ENERGY BEGETS ENERGY

CHAPTER 9: SOME EXAMPLES

CHAPTER 10: RECOVER/PRE-SUICIDE 2

PART 3: ANXIETY AND EMOTIONS

CHAPTER 11: DO YOU HAVE ANXIETY?

CHAPTER 12: MEDICATIONS

CHAPTER 13: EMOTIONS

CHAPTER 14: WHY PRETEND?

CHAPTER 15: DO YOU LIVE BY YOUR FEELINGS?

CHAPTER 16: HOW DO YOU CONTROL YOUR FEELINGS?

PART 4: ACCOMPANYING EMOTIONS

CHAPTER 17: SELF-WORTH AND REJECTION

CHAPTER 18: HOPELESS AND HELPLESS

CHAPTER 19: DEPRESSION

PART 5: OUR WEAKNESSES CAUSE EMOTIONAL PAIN

CHAPTER 20: DO YOU HAVE AN INFERIORITY COMPLEX?

CHAPTER 21: ARE YOU GROWN UP?

CHAPTER 22 ‘FALSE NOBILITY

CHAPTER 23: ABUSE

CHAPTER 24: TO THE ONE WHO DOES NOT KNOW

PART 6: KNOWLEDGE IS POWER

CHAPTER 25: EMOTIONAL BLINDNESS & THE PULSE.

CHAPTER 26: SEX IS NOT AN APPETITE.

CHAPTER 27: RECOGNIZE YOUR RELATIVE

CHAPTER 28: RECOGNIZE YOUR ENEMY

CHAPTER 29: HAVE YOU, THE ABUSED, BECOME AN ABUSER?

PART 7: THE RECOVERY FROM CHRONIC PAIN

CHAPTER 30: OUR PAIN AND ACTIONS

CHAPTER 31: CHRONIC EMOTIONAL PAIN

CHAPTER 32: CARE FOR YOURSELF

CHAPTER 33: RECOVERY/PRE-SUICIDE 3

CHAPTER 34: REBUILD YOUR LIFE

PART 8: GET STRONG

CHAPTER 35: WHAT IF?

CHAPTER 36: HANDLING FRUSTRATIONS

CHAPTER 37: WHY WAS I BORN?

CHAPTER 38: YOUR FIFTEEN SELVES

SECTION TWO

SUICIDE

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER 39: THE QUESTIONNAIRE

CHAPTER 40: TO LIVE OR NOT LIVE?

CHAPTER 41: LETTER TO A SUICIDAL YOUTH

CHAPTER 42: WHERE DO YOU GO AFTER SUICIDE?

CHAPTER 43: QUESTIONS YOU WILL BE ASKED AFTER DEATH

CHAPTER 44: THE COSMIC LAWS ON SUICIDE

CHAPTER 45: RECOVERY/PRE-SUICIDE: THE 3 STAGES

CHAPTER 46: THE CRITICAL YEAR

CHAPTER 47: SUICIDE IS NOT A PSYCHIATRIC ILLNESS

CHAPTER 48: A PARTICIPATION IN CRIME

CHAPTER 49: BEREAVEMENT OF A SUICIDE

Emotional pain is worse than physical pain. Sometimes it leads to suicide. That is why both topics are discussed in this book.

PREFACE

Emotional pain is as severe as physical pain. It makes us stop living normal lives. It removes our ability to enjoy life or fulfill our potential and talents. It prevents us from being productive individuals and ruins our intelligence. As a result, we can no longer make intelligent decisions concerning our welfare or that of others. 

It can lead us to destroy our lives or the lives of others around us. In its extreme throes, we no longer want to live. So, how do you approach a person in severe emotional pain or heading toward suicide?

How we deal with this has been left entirely to chance and our whims! Why?

It is essential to know the rules that emotions follow.

This book has tried to approach a person not only while he is thrashing in pain but hopefully before, too. It is best if he reads it when he is not affected. Then he would be calm enough to grasp its contents and form a plan of his own.

Perhaps the book is being looked at by someone so overcome with emotional pain that he cannot think straight. That is okay. A seed may be planted. He may return to it later when he vaguely remembers that something helpful might have been written here.

The author has introduced several new terms, Emotional Blindness is one such. We go about our daily activities, oblivious to what is happening in front of us until it is too late, and we are left devasted. We must regularly check The Pulse of our Family Life. We must also have an Emotional Boundary and a Moral Boundary.

Three other programs have been introduced. There is The S.T.O.P. Program for depression and The Seven-Step Program to deal with emotional pain. Finally, the author encourages the reader to try the Recovery/Pre-Suicide Program with its three stages before he leaves this world.

M. Kukreja, M.D.

PART 1: THE ACUTE PAIN

CHAPTER 1: A LETTER TO YOU

Dear loved one,

Do you currently see life as steady, grey, heavy, and unbearable? Are you too depressed to live?

Or, have you been suddenly hit by situations and are in shock? For example, is there a natural disaster, an earthquake, or a collapsed building?

Then there are acts by others. Perhaps you have been betrayed. Your spouse has left you. You failed or were rejected in an interview. You were assaulted. The gunman walked into a school and killed the children. You have suffered an unbearable loss. The loss of a child is extremely painful. How can anyone recover?

What if you have no one to call your own? Perhaps you have the daily pain of abuse. Your relationship may be causing tremendous pain.

And what about the pain of a child who is given up for adoption? It is the ultimate rejection of a helpless being! There is no concern for what the child will go through in life from no fault of his own. Later, the parent will tell such a child on meeting him that she always loved him. That is not true. She is responsible for his pain! No animal will abandon its young! A parent who loves his child will go through hell and fire to keep the child, nourish, protect and raise him.

Love means to protect.

One is doomed to a life of pain if one has an inferiority complex, dependency ( cannot let go), a disease to please, and is running after people for their love.

Life will also be painful if one lacks self-respect, has no value for work or money, and has a false nobility based on self-sacrificing and protecting an abuser.

The above two paragraphs create a complete cocktail of suffering! But you did not even know you had these deficiencies. No one taught you to be aware of your character!

Life will also be painful if you live with one who is greedy, immoral, abusive, has an addiction to power, wants to control others, or is lazy and shirks responsibilities. Do you have the courage to leave him? Do you recognize abuse?

People who say that you should form a wall inside where his words cannot reach you have no idea what they are talking about.

No such wall can be built as long as there are daily interactions.

The interactions poke holes in the wall in an already wounded person. Only when you have been separated from an abuser for a year and have healed can you build a wall where his words can no longer hurt!

You have shattered into a thousand pieces. How do you put yourself together? How do you will yourself to go on keeping your sanity intact? How do you rebuild your life which is in shambles right now? You do not even want to do that! Where do you see the light in the darkness of ignorance and despair,

Your question is, How do I live? Frankel pointed out in his book that a man must have a why to live in order to have a how to live. If you have minors or parents, your duty is clear. You must be around to help them. Even if your children have left you, the other parent may die or become bankrupt.

Here is a person who is broken, despondent, in the throes of despair, and disinterested in life. How do you help him reach a stage where he accepts his pain but can live with it and where he values himself as much as another?

How do you make him calm, confident, curious, peaceful, strong, and happy again?

This book guides you down the path. Recovery is a painful process. The book addresses how to deal with and heal from pain and the associated emotions. It divides the stages you go through to recover and how to get stronger. It helps you to see the facts about yourself that need changing.

The book teaches you prevention. Once you decide that you will only give one more chance to a person causing you pain, or not more than three months, you have saved yourself years and years of betrayal, anguish, and deterioration.

For those who need recovery immediately, please go to the section called Recovery from Acute Pain.

Sometimes, only by standing alone can you finally become the person you were meant to be.

CHAPTER 2: BUTTERFLIES

Who are we to judge how a person handles his emotional storm? Many have been destroyed or become crippled by it.

Some have walked similar paths ahead of us. They guide the way and inspire us. But a lot depends on what we have been through before and our inner strength, faith, and social support.

Those who have survived well, have found themselves transformed with empathy, compassion, peace, the capacity to laugh again, and appreciation of the priorities in life.

They have gone through the pupa stage