The Art of Letting Go: Relinquishing Control

By Gloria J Cummings

After the crushing blow of betrayal and deep disappointment in God, the author found herself depressed and dominated by uncontrolled emotions. ... 

The Art of Letting Go is a personal journey based on the power of Biblical truth. It will speak to hurting adults who have found it difficult, even impossible to let go of

• Language: English
• Publisher: Called Out Publications
• Release date: Dec 14, 2022
• ISBN: 9781088079317

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COPYRIGHT

COPYRIGHT PAGE

Copyright © 2022 by Gloria J Cummings

All rights reserved. No part of this booklet may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, without prior written permission from the author.

Published by Called Out Publications, an imprint of Called Out Ministries, Inc.

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are taken from The New King James Version (NKJV). Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Wheaton, Illinois 60189, U.S.A. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked AMP are taken from the Amplified Bible (AMP). Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Section 2

DEDICATION

This book is lovingly dedicated to my precious family, my dear friend Shelly Herbig, Spirit Life Church, and Peru First Assembly of God. You supported me and gave me strength during the most difficult time of my life. You loved me when I needed your love, and I am extremely grateful to God for all of you.

You are the best!

INTRO

INTRODUCTION

At 2:30 on a Thursday morning, the awesome presence of the Lord suddenly awakened me.

My heart pulsated in my chest as I lay on my back, completely still due to the holiness of God. My body began to produce heat as I shook with fear, knowing everything in my life was not accurately aligned to glorify and honor my Savior. My spirit was convicted of the bad but mostly indecisive choices I had been making.

True repentance began to flow from my broken and open heart. Like Isaiah, I knew I was not as clean as I could be. Yet at the same time I had an overwhelming desire to be pure in the manifested presence of my King! Just as Isaiah heard the Lord’s call to go (Isaiah 6), I too heard the Lord beckoning me. He then gave me a vision, which I want to share with you so you will understand how this book began to take shape.

I saw a side view of a beautiful veil made of lush, thick, royal-purple velvet. On one side I saw darkness, emptiness, and isolation. Tremendous light radiated in multiple beams from the other. The light was so brilliant, there were no shadows. The pureness and beauty that illuminated from this glorious sight paralyzed me. The rays seemed endless, and yet they created variety and depth.

The Lord spoke to me. Come behind the veil.

I knew what He meant. He was calling and inviting me to walk out of the darkness and emptiness in my life. He was showing me the safety and magnificence of His love! He was wooing me from hiding and showing me His options. Honestly, I was afraid.

Within a moment of His invitation to come behind the veil, I heard Him further say, The truth will shock you.

While I was silenced by the Lord’s marvelous presence, He gave me insight into the double meaning of His words. He revealed unpleasing attitudes in my heart and errors that had slipped into my faith. He also shed light on areas that had grown dim. But at the same time, He gave me glimpses into His purposes for the future — things I would never have dreamed or attempted. He unveiled my negative, faithless side, while at the same time revealing new, fresh avenues that would soon break forth for me!

From this wonderful display of choice, my journey began toward The Art of Letting Go. I will endeavor to share some of the truths and insights I discovered while walking this new path.

Chapter 1

UNDER CONTROL

Eighteen years ago, I was divorced from my husband after twenty-four years of marriage.

If someone had told me I would go through the pain of divorce, I would not have believed it. At fifteen, I gave this man my heart, and now he no longer wanted it. The pain of rejection, the shame of separation, and the guilt of broken conviction were more than I could bear. I found myself unable to let go or move on. All the dreams, promises, and memories faded away into a lie. It seemed so surreal that surely it was just a dream, but it wasn’t. It took a toll on me, emotionally and spiritually.

I realize I am not the only one to go through divorce, and I have frustrated many people because I couldn’t get over it. But from a young age, I had a strong conviction that marriage was a lifelong commitment. For me, this was more than divorce; it was failure to keep God’s Word. Honestly, it was devastating for me. How was I to pick up the shattered pieces of my life? It seemed hopeless and impossible, like picking up the pieces of a broken China plate. How do you find them all when they have sailed in a hundred directions? The hardship in trying to pick up the pieces was realizing I could not put them back together, that restoration was lost.

So, what do you do when things don’t turn out the way you planned? The solution seems simple when answering for someone else. However, when you are the one being asked, it isn’t so easy.

Through this experience, I found myself coming under the control of failure, rejection, anger, and fear. Issues I had spent years mastering now popped up and dominated me. I was especially under emotional bondage, and it came through divorce.

Recognizing that we are under control is crucial to finding the ability to let go!

Holding Patterns

Throughout my walk with the Lord, I’d heard a lot of teaching on crucifying the flesh. But until I came to this painful crossroad in my life, I didn’t realize I had put to death the old man.

Surprisingly, I replaced my habits of Bible study and long prayer times with reruns of past memories and rewinds of broken promises. I could not get a handle on my emotions. I could not eat or sleep. When I tried to pray, tormenting images pounded my mind. Often, tears dripped continuously on the pages of my Bible while I read. Many times I had to read the same verse a dozen times to grasp what it was saying, and in frustration I often gave up. I was stuck! I was spinning my spiritual wheels, unable to get traction so I could get back on course.

This charge I commit to you, son Timothy, ​

according to the prophecies previously

made concerning you, that by them ​

you may wage the good warfare, having faith and

a good conscience, which some having rejected,

concerning the faith have suffered

shipwreck, of whom are Hymenaeus

and Alexander, whom I delivered to Satan

that they may learn not to blaspheme.

(1 Timothy 1:18-20)

Timothy had been given prophecies that foretold his future role in the church. Here Paul relayed two truths. First, warfare is part of ministry; we are engaged constantly in a fight, but it is a good fight! In the heat of the battle, we must maintain courage and diligence. Warfare can become wearisome and discouraging, but Paul reminded Timothy that it was his duty to stay in the war; it was vital for him to remain steady. The greatest damage we can do against the kingdom of darkness is to stay in the fight and continue to do what God called us to do.

The second truth Paul conveyed is that we must hold tightly to faith and a good conscience. A violated conscience can cause faith to shipwreck. My conscience was bombarded by accusations from the devil. He pounded me with extreme guilt that left me powerless and defenseless. This was his strategy for defeating me. The problem with accusation is that we feel incapable of resisting because there is always an element of truth in it. I needed to repair this hole in my armor.

These men whom Paul referenced had strayed from the path of truth (2 Timothy 2:17-18). They spoke lies and falsehoods about the resurrection and deviating from the Word of God assures godless behavior (v. 16). I began to see that the enemy also wanted me to move away from the authority of the Scriptures. He wanted me to believe his message of lies and thus shipwreck my faith, and I had to admit it was working.

As with these two men, when we turn from truth it affects others (v. 18). Their lies caused people to defect from their faith. The message the enemy spoke to me included suggestions of justification. You have a right to feel the way you do. You must protect and defend yourself because no one else is going to. This was, for a long time, a continual cycle of defeat in my life. It held me under its control, but the Lord warned me that I had a responsibility to my family and to those I led spiritually. I had to get back on the right track.

Through my emotions, the enemy tried to convince me to remain bitter and unforgiving. He used anger to challenge me to get even with those who resisted my words and efforts to do what was right. At times, my anger escalated to the point that I knew I could harm someone. Then tremendous feelings of condemnation overwhelmed me. How could I call myself a minister? How could I be worthy to carry the Gospel message? Would I ever free myself from all these strongholds? I regularly had to confess these feelings to the Lord.

My heart knew that my emotions could not dominate me, but my head could not comprehend how to get free. No one had taught me how to handle these emotions, so Jesus enrolled me in a new subject in the school of the Spirit.

During this time, the Lord spoke sweetly to me: The devil does seek entrance through your soul. The Lord showed me an evil conspiracy meant to destroy me emotionally. This ruthless adversary even tried to seduce me into believing God didn’t care. He taunted me with temptations that questioned the Lord’s sincerity. After all, look where serving God has gotten you: divorced! he scoffed.

When we walk daily under the control of our emotions, according to our old nature, it assures failure. Galatians 5:17 says the flesh wars against the Spirit so that we do not do the things we desire. As the sons and daughters of God, we are to be led by the Spirit of God. Carnal thoughts, dominated by unhealthy feelings and emotions, bring death (Romans 8:6), but to be spiritually minded is life and peace! These are our aim: life and peace. We must stay on target.

With this new focus, I also began to claim Psalm 23:3: He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. The Lord promised restoration to me! This glimpse of freedom empowered me to get back on the path of righteousness! I began to find healing for my wounded soul. I thoroughly understood that His grace had rescued me, and for His reasons I needed to get back on track.

And if you call on the Father, who without partiality judges according to each one’s work, conduct yourselves throughout the time of your stay here in fear; knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things, like silver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.

(1 Peter 1:17-19)

I was not my own! Although healing and freedom did not come quickly, they did happen. I had to trust God to bring my emotions in step with His Word, and that took some time. It was a process of restoration. Restoring an old piece of furniture, takes many steps. These steps are necessary to bring the result of beauty and usefulness.

Tested Faith

Because I had slipped off the beaten path of faith, emotional battles raged all around me. This position brought heightened insecurity, which left me feeling helpless and unprotected. It also brought a state of uncertainty and restlessness because I did not know what was ahead! The ploy of the enemy is to get us so bound up that we can’t get free. However, God always makes a way of escape!

But let patience have its perfect work,

that you may be perfect and complete,

lacking nothing.

(James 1:4)

This verse is found in the context of trials. Our faith is tested, pushed to the limits sometimes, but this produces patient endurance! Perseverance is the fruit borne of trials. It is the ability to stand firm under pressure; it is staying power. It won’t concede or surrender, but rather submits to the process of fortification because it has confidence of victory! When we allow endurance to grow, we will reach maturity. It stretches us to an extreme degree of excellence, purity, and completeness. The end result is wholeness and wisdom. We then lack nothing.

Since this step leaves us entire and complete, it is the necessary step to getting back into the fight of faith. The idea of returning to the path of righteousness carries with it the imagery of restoration. This means to turn back, not to the starting point, but to the point of departure. It is a return to the race we previously ran because our faith is at stake.

That the genuineness of your faith,

being much more precious than gold

that perishes, though it is tested by fire,

may be found to praise, honor, and glory

at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

(1 Peter 1:7)

Faith and perseverance are key principles to letting go of what was. They are important elements in God’s future plans for our lives. We are more valuable than antique furniture. He gives us beauty for ashes!

The Lord further impressed upon me a deeper revelation: He also wanted entrance to my emotions. The focus of