The Real Reason Trolls are so Grumpy

By James Hywel

This story is about….hmmm, hang on, the word is so scary that I'm not even sure I should say it.

Let me just think for a moment while I decide if you are brave enough to hear the word.

Ok, I suppose I'll have to say it, otherwise, this story is not going to make any sense. Unless I substitute the word for something else?

Hmmm, that might work. Ok, let me do that.

This is the story about the real reason avocados are so grumpy.

Hold on, that makes no sense at all. Right, I think I'm just going to have to come out and say it.

Close your eyes. Are you ready?

TROLL!

Contains Dyslexia-Friendly Font.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Oink Books
• Release date: Oct 30, 2022
• ISBN: 9798215923412

James Hywel

James began dabbling in writing in 2001 with many of his first books going to 5th and 6th editions. In August 2021 he wrote The Musings of the Milliner for and featuring his niece and nephew in Scotland. Little did he know that this book would be the start of The Magical Misadventures of Mr Milliner series (now containing seven books). His next series was the much-loved Adventures of Albert Mouse, featuring Dartmouth’s most fa-mouse resident, Albert Mouse. James has now written over 30 children's books. To try and explain where his stories come from would be impossible and not even James can explain it. His writing process is as unorthodox and quirky as his books are magical and mind-transporting. James pens a weekly email entitled Letters from the Oak Tree where he talks about writing, books, and basically anything and everything else.

Book preview

Chapter 1

This story is about….hmmm, hang on, the word is so scary that I’m not even sure I should say it.

Let me just think for a moment while I decide if you are brave enough to hear the word.

Ok, I suppose I’ll have to say it, otherwise, this story is not going to make any sense. Unless I substitute the word for something else?

Hmmm, that might work. Ok, let me do that.

This is the story about the real reason avocados are so grumpy.

Hold on, that makes no sense at all. Right, I think I’m just going to have to come out and say it.

Close your eyes. Are you ready?

TROLL!

See, it is pretty scary, isn’t it?

In your mind, you have already imagined what it might look like, but whatever you have imagined, you need to make it at least ten times worse, maybe even a hundred times worse. Trolls are so bad that even other Trolls won’t live near each other. 

The thing about Trolls, that everyone knows, is that they are very, very grumpy. There have been many books written about why they are so grumpy, but they are all wrong. Some books even say that Trolls eat children for breakfast, which is complete nonsense.

Personally, I don't think that any of the people who have written about them have actually ever really met a Troll. 

On the other hand, I have met quite a few, and the one thing they have all said about being grumpy is that it's down to one reason and one reason only. 

I’m now going to tell you the real reason. So, if you’re sitting comfortably I’ll begin to tell you a story that will explain everything.

Chapter 2

The other thing about Trolls that everybody knows is that they live under bridges. That's not really the reason they are grumpy, I’ll get to that part in a minute. 

What most people don’t know is that they are given this bridge by their father. It’s true!

When a Troll is born, their father goes out and finds a river or stream and starts to build a bridge for his son. He works every day collecting stones and rocks, and never rests until the bridge is finished, which usually takes five or six years. 

This is just how it was for our Troll. I’m calling him our Troll because the other thing about Trolls is they don’t have names. They’re not called Bob, Andy, Clive or Bill. They are just, well, they’re just called Trolls. 

Anyway, if you’re ready I’ll start the story about the real reason Trolls are grumpy.

Chapter 3

Our story starts in a place not very far from where you are right now. I know, you’re a bit shocked that Trolls live near you, but they do. 

Anyway, one day our Troll, who was only six years old,