My Journey from Perverseness to Purity

By Shamine McDowell

In her book, My Journey from Perverseness to Purity, Shamine Marie McDowell candidly talks about the detrimental consequences of choosing to be sexually active as an unmarried single. She shares about seeds of lust that were planted in her heart at an early age and the heartbreaking consequences that followed for years to come. Although Shamine

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rain Publishing
• Release date: Jul 1, 2015
• ISBN: 9780996242196

Book preview

The Seed was Planted Early

And the enemy who sowed it was the devil.

~Matthew 13:39

When I was a little girl growing up, like most children, I didn’t have a care in the world. I made mud pies with my friend who lived a few houses away from me, played hide and seek with other children on the block and watched Saturday morning cartoons after having my usual breakfast which was always a bowl of Captain Crunch or Frosted Flakes. In my eyes, life was great. My Mom and I lived in my grandmother’s home for a few years and during this time there were other relatives who lived in the home as well. Although I am my mother’s only child, I would say that I come from a big family.

My mother had nine sisters and brothers combined and my maternal grandmother had nine brothers and sisters as well. You can imagine what my grandmother’s home looked like during the holidays. Folks would be laughing, yelling, eating and having a grand ‘ole time. Summertime weekends were the best. My grandmother, who was affectionately known as Momma, had a large back yard and cook-outs were always the norm. This was a time for family and friends and friends of friends to stop by and enjoy the summer sun, good food, and fellowship. I remember my Mom throwing birthday parties for me in the backyard and all my cousins and friends would come to help me celebrate. I enjoyed those early days at my grandmother’s house. Those were my formative years and they were full of innocence.

Around the age of seven or eight, perhaps younger, my innocence became tainted and I had no idea that what I was being exposed to would have an effect on me later on in life. I had no clue that the door for sexual immorality and promiscuity was slowly being opened. I had no idea what perverseness was back then but there were people in my family who unintentionally exposed me to pornographic images in dirty magazines among other things. I must admit that I was an inquisitive child and so I would look at these images of naked men and women inside the covers of these magazines that were meant to not only take men on a fantasy ride but to also feed their sexual appetites. I gazed upon these images that I saw not once, not twice, but many times. I don’t recall becoming aroused but I do know that there was something in me that wanted to look at these images after being exposed to them. Of course I would sneak and look at them because something inside of me knew that I should not be looking at those naked bodies. That innate sense of right and wrong was most certainly there ringing my bell, trying to get my attention but at the same time I had now become familiar with and actually enjoyed these vices.

So there I was, exposed to the nakedness of unknown men and women in dirty magazines and the stage was being set for what was to come later on down the road. The seed that was planted in fertile ground began to take root. When a seed is planted and it continues to be watered it has no other choice except to grow. Seeds also need to be in a place where there is a proper temperature in order for it to germinate. Satan, the fallen angel, knew that my ground of innocence and naiveté was fertile enough for the seeds of lust to take root, grow, and bear fruit. The fruit of masturbation and ultimately pornographic videos, premarital sex, adultery, fornication, and other sexually immoral acts would begin to hang from this evil and wicked tree.

Satan tried to abort my destiny from the very beginning and he knew that if he could get me to engage in illicit sex and other things perverse, that his assignment would be completed. Up until this point, I hadn’t had my first sexual experience yet but Satan knew the plans and purposes that God had for me and he knew that God had great plans for my life. He also knew that I would be a threat to him as well. He was and still is scared as hell and I’m sure he said to his cohorts, We’ve got to get this one out of the way. We cannot let her accomplish what God has called her to do so let us begin destroying her now! If we don’t destroy her, people will get delivered and they’ll walk in their purpose too! She must die! I know that some of you may be asking, Well, what has God called you to do that is so great that Satan is intimidated by you? The simple answer is this: My experiences and everything that I’ve gone through are going to help other women who have gone through or who are currently going through the things that I have. So, if my experiences and how I overcame them will help just one person, Satan is not pleased with that. He wants everyone to suffer and be miserable just as he is. All he needs is a little crack or loophole to get his foot in the door - the door of our hearts. For you, it may have been the seed of gambling, overeating, stealing, or something else. Whatever the seed, Satan planted it in your heart and mind. As I’ve already stated, in my case, he used lust, sexual immorality and sexual images that I should have never laid eyes on. My curiosity had been aroused and now that these images had been implanted and imbedded in my mind, I wanted to look at real life naked bodies!

I remember having a few friends over my house one particular day and a male family member had just finished taking a shower. When he went to his room to get dressed me and my friends went up the stairs and walked over to where his room was. The door was shut but there was a key hole that was big enough for someone to peek into. I’m sure that I was the one who initiated this but I’m not sure if I was the first one to take a look. At any rate, one by one we took a look at this grown man in his nakedness. We began to giggle and we were obviously loud enough for him to hear us because he yelled a few words at us without opening the door and we all ran away. We thought it was funny. Well, at least I did.

As I write this chapter, I’m thinking about this incident and how what I was doing and seeing was not so funny after all. I was allowing my eyes to be infiltrated with things that they shouldn’t have but I didn’t know any better at the time. I was a child who was being influenced by my