Return of Salamanda: Salamanda Appreciation Society 2021 collaborative anthology: Dunalley Primary School SAS, #2

By Chrissy Garwood and Dunalley Primary School SAS

Welcome to the Salamanda Appreciation Society's second book. Within these pages, you will meet snazzy characters brought to life by 12 creative young SAS authors. Strap on your gadgets and prepare yourself for absolute mayhem!!!

Salamanda has sent an intriguing invitation, and we student storytellers are responding to his mysterious summons. Where else will you find quirky teen agents, a wizard-in-training, the amazing Food Team, a moody shape-shifter, multiple Salamandroids, an evildoer trapped in a bottle in the middle of the earth, a talking chicken named Big John, a truck driver who can organise whatever transport you need, and two sassy animals working together?

Suspend reality as you visit Unicorn Land; sojourn with dragons; or sneak into the Wizard King's palace in search of the elusive Salamanda.

Is Salamanda male or female? A villain or a hero? Animal, human or maybe both? Read on to find out.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Chrissy Garwood
• Release date: Dec 5, 2021
• ISBN: 9780648965176

Chrissy Garwood

Greetings from Tasmania, Australia. I've never lived outside my home state, but in my imagination, I am a world traveller. I've been married for 40+ years to a patient man who has given me the freedom to pursue this dream of being an author. I have two adult sons, who live independently. Publishing a novel was a childhood ambition. In the intervening years, God has brought me through many challenging experiences. The adventures my characters endure are works of fiction – a small grain of inspiration, a mountain of imagination, and months of hard work  to bring it all together. I have learned a lot about myself and my ambitions while pursuing the writing dream. The confidence I am gaining as a storyteller is enriched my character. I believe it is making me a humbler disciple of Jesus Christ, a more determined encourager, a better friend.

Book preview

Chapter 1

WE COULD MAYBE GO TO Unicorn Land, I said. Or become secret spies because we can hypnotise people? So let’s be spies.

Ok, Thomas, said Big John. It’s going to be a big walk back to town.

My friend and I walked off. Big John is a talking zombie chicken and I’m a teenager.

We’ve made it back, I said. It only took one day.

As we passed a construction site, Big John pointed towards a road worker. That’s Salamanda! I saw a schoolgirl shape-shift into a schoolboy and then switch to a road worker.

I said, Quick, hide behind this car. Somehow she has recovered and now she is back.

But how? said Big John. We put a chopper in the middle of her and split her in half.

We should head back to the base in the desert, but we have to wait for her to go.

But why is she turning into a road worker? Big John asked. And why is she driving a truck?

The truck’s driving away, I said. Let’s follow it.

But we don’t have a car and you said we had to go back to base first.

Remember? I said. I have a spray that turns into anything.

Ok, said Big John. Turn it into a tracker so we can follow the truck.

I pulled a silly string can out of my pocket. It was cold. I think I’ve had it in my pocket for a year. Now let’s see if it works?

I shook the can, took off the cap, held down the top and sprayed—

Ok, I have made the tracker.

Throw it, said Big John.

Ok.

Sh-ee-ewwww. Plop.

It’s on, Big John said. Oh no! She heard it and now she has seen us! Run! Quick use the spray to make us some jetpacks.

Ok, I said. But the can is almost empty. We need nuts, bolts, a fire extinguisher and a spanner.

Big John frowned. The only spanner is with the blacksmith but the blacksmith is in the snow cave. There’s only one way to get there.

Ok, I said. Are you going to call Donny?

I could but he is in bed right now.

In bed right now? It’s four o’clock. That’s insane.

I know, right, Big John said. Oh, there is a spanner right here. That’s good. We don’t have to go the Snowy Mountains.

We worked together until we made the jet packs.

Big John went click, smack, click again. I’ve put mine on. Hurry up.

I put the jet pack on my back, did up the two belts and the under strap.

Then I clicked the button on the side of the jet pack. Off we go!

Big John took offfffffffffff...

Sheeeeew.

Chapter 2

THERE IS THE BASE, I said. Ok, land here. Now go down the slippery slide.

Big John went first. Ok, we have made it.

What is that noise in the back of the dojo? I asked.

I don’t know, said Big John.

I will have a look.

I will follow behind you, said Big John.

Ok.

Big John followed me through different rooms.

What’s that? I asked.

That’s a portal, said Big John.

Someone must have spawned a portal. Should we jump in?

Let’s jump in, said Big John.

Ok.

Let’s go!

Big John jumped in. I could hear him screaming. Awaa-wawa-wawaa-wawawaa-aaa-wawa-wawaa-waa-wa-waa-waa-wawaa-wawa...

I went after him. The portal started closing and now it’s really tight. It’s going to make me burst in half. Shew! I made it!

What is this dimension? I asked Big John when he came back to me.

Let’s explore, said Big John. There’s a castle on top of that hill. Let’s go to the castle.

Ok.

We approached the castle.

I think I can see some people... I said. Hi!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My name’s Thomas.

They can’t hear me. I banged on the gate. I can’t get in.

Big John walked away and I followed him. What’s that funky smell? Big John asked. He pointed at a tree down the hill. That must be a pickle tree.

Let’s go down the hill to the tree, I said.

I tried not to sneeze. Aarr arrr aarrr cheewwww!

Be quiet, said Big John. They will hear us. Quick, get down, Thomas!

Who will see us? I asked, looking around. I couldn’t see anyone, but then I heard something.

Snap, chick, chick.

Someone was standing behind me. I could feel a gun pressing into my back. It was hurting.

Put your hands up against the wall, a voice said.

I put my hands on the wall, and then I looked over my shoulder. I don’t know you, I said to the teenager. Are you Agent Spaghetti? I’ve heard about you from Eden.

No, I’m not Agent Spaghetti. We left him at the camp. I’m Sam and that’s Gabe fighting with the crazy, giant, zombie chicken?

Get over here— Gabe yelled.

Big John stopped fighting. He stared at Sam holding a gun. Thomas. I’m coming!

Calm down, Sam said. We’re not here to hurt anyone.

Big John frowned. Why are you here?

Well, yo— Sam began.

Shut it, Gabe said. You’re not supposed to answer that.

Sam smiled at Gabe. Oh sorry—

You’re also not supposed to answer that, Gabe said. Then he looked at me. What’s your name?

My name is Thomas.

And my na— began Big John.

AHHH! A TALKING CHICKEN! shrieked Sam.

He’s not that scary, I said.

Gabe and Sam took us to their camp to meet Agent Spaghetti.

Sam whispered to me on the way, Does the chicken really have a name?

YES, OF COURSE, I HAVE A NAME, DOOFUS! IT’S BIG JOHN!

Big John, Gabe and Sam laughed.

Big John and I introduced ourselves to Agent Spaghetti.

How exactly did you get here? Agent Spaghetti said.

We were in a dojo and we heard a sound in the back. It was a portal, so we went through and ended up here.

Agent Spaghetti said, You know where there’s a portal! We need to go there NOW!

Big John and I led them to the portal. We went through and we didn’t appear in the same spot as last time.

This does not look like a dojo, Thomas, Sam said.

Agent Spaghetti, Gabe said, it must have changed when Thomas and Big John went through.

We saw people in a restaurant. Big John went over and then through the door. But all the people were manikins.

There was nothing more to see.

This isn’t where we need to be, said Agent Spaghetti.

We went back through the portal but this time there were robots.

So we went back through the portal again. When we left the portal a dragon shot us with a fireball and broke the portal.

We need to hide! said Big John.

Big John found a hole – it was a cave. We waited a few minutes and we assumed it was safe but we almost got shot. It was close enough to knock us all out.

Only Big John was there when I woke up.

Let’s go looking for them, said Big John.

Big John and I found another portal and went through it.

Everything around us had holes as if they had been shot. There were alien ships in the sky. Everything looked different.

We need to make our way to the city so we can see what is happening, I said. What if aliens have taken over the city?

We need to move, said Big John.

I can see there’s something he’s not telling me.

No! I said. We need to find out what has happened.

I’m going back to your house in the other town, said Big John.

Well, I’m going to keep going into the city.

Well, do that, Big John snapped.

Fine! I started walking off.

Fine. Big John went the other way.

I kept walking through the city. The aliens were trying to catch me, and I had to hide around in the shops. I walked out the back of a fancy shop and circled around until I could remember where the portal was. They were trying to catch me with their ships, but I got through the portal. They shot the portal and it blew up.

I need to make a new portal. I have to find Agent Spaghetti.

Chapter 3

BIG JOHN HERE. THOMAS and I have split up and that’s not good. We needed to stay together. A huge alien wave was coming. I knew the aliens wanted Thomas, but I couldn’t tell him because he’d do something stupid.

I arrived back in the old town. I walked around, the place was destroyed. I looked for parts. All right I need to get to the main store. There should be some tools and other supplies. I need to make a lightning gun so I can take down the aliens.

I walked into the store. Everything was wrecked and all the shelves had fallen over. I wondered what was through the door with staff on it. I pushed the door open. A suspicious noise was coming from a locker. I opened the locker and it was a portal. It sucked me in.

Where am I? What? There is the castle!

I didn’t want to go there. I turned around and followed a mushroom covered path. Around a corner, I saw a market. I flew towards it. I don’t normally fly, but this time I had to because I was in a hurry. I’m worried about Thomas and what could be happening to him. There was a big red sign that said Mushman Market. I couldn’t remember what a Mushman was.

I could see many stalls. Each one had a sign. ‘Mushman Blacksmith’. ‘Mushman Supermarket’. ‘Mushman Wood.’ All the different prices were in mushrooms.

I still had Thomas’s bag. I flew back to the path and filled it with mushrooms.

The Mushmen were tall. They had fungi growing all over them. They were white and red, with mushrooms on their heads. Now I remembered. The Mushmen were slaves for the king. He started making Mushmen from the people who came through the portal.

I still needed things to make the lightning gun, so I wandered around looking for someone who would sell me parts.

What’s up, dude? said a random Mushman.

Hi, Mushman.

Hi. I looked at his stall. His table was covered with dimension parts. I was secretly happy, but because I’m a zombie chicken I didn’t let him know. Could I buy four shards for a portal?

Yess, said the Mushman, raising his eyebrows, and would you like this Super Moon Rocky Rocket?

He brought the Rocky Rocket out from the back of his stall, in a cage. I stared at it for a moment. A tiny green see-through object with four legs, no arms, and a tail. The big blue eyes were under the ears that stuck out from the body. There was no head but it had a huge smiling mouth.

Wow, I said. I used to have one of these, but they are really rare. I lost mine when Salamanda attacked Chickenland.

I know, said the Mushman. I sold you the last one.

I was surprised. What else do you know?

You’re Big John. Before I was a Mushman, I helped you build Chickenland.

What can this Rocky Rocket do? I asked.

It shoots fire and ice, the Mushman said. He was excited. And it can teleport to specific dimensions.

Ok, I will take it.

I paid him for the shards. They cost ten mushrooms and Rocky cost 500 mushrooms. I flew away until I found a tree to land in. It’s good to be a chicken and blend in with the leaves.

Ok, Rocky. What can you do?

First Rocky glowed, then it started to fly.

Shoot a fireball, I told it.

Pewww!

It shot a fireball from its mouth. I flapped out of the way just in time.

That’s unbelievable, Rocky! You will make an awesome pet. Ok, let’s head off into ‘You Know Where’.

I meant Neverland but I couldn’t say that name out loud. It was a secret place. Salamanda might be listening.

Chapter 4

ONE MINUTE LATER.

Arrrrrrrrr! Tsunami in the sky! Now there is poop and wee coming out of the sky! Oh no! The poo and the wee seem to be acidic. Now it’s golden water! What is happening? I have to run away.

I went and jumped in a lake. I got out of the water and kept running.

Two days later, I found a car. It was a Hyundai XL twin cam with a short snorkel, rally tyres, no back window, rust. It was covered in mud. Let’s jump in, I told Rocky.

We took off. Later I called up Donny to swap the Hyundai for a hover-mobile. Donny was happy with the swap.

Big John, Donny said. With this hover-mobile, you can build, brake, shoot, fly, and drive.

Ok. Better get going.

See you later, alligator.

I waited until Donny left before going to the portal. Rocky, now we can run away and get some ice cream. Let’s go back to the oval world. The hover-mobile went into the portal and came out the other side. Ok, there is the end of the portal. OMG! There is an alien ship about to get my ice cream so I am going to run it over.

Rer-rer-rer-rer-ning. Nigggggggggggggggggggggggggg, nign-ning, ning, ning, nign.

Launch it off the jump! Yeah! Ha, baby!

We hit the alien ship, landed in the water. No more aliens.

Ok, let’s drive home.

Ninggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg,

ninggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg,

ninggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg—

Eerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Handbrakes as if I was in a Drift Skid Masters! I would be the best. Ok, Rocky, we are here.

Chapter 5

WE STOPPED ON THE ROAD in front of a tower and used the walkie talky to talk to Donny’s friend, Jock. He was at the top of the broken tower which was really a witch house covered in weeds. The hover-mobile gave us big red apples and tomatoes to eat while Jock told us how to make a portal.

You need to make a lightning gun, Jock said, but to do that, you need to go the lightning field. It’s a few days journey in a car after you go over the desert. Finally, there’s a hike up the mountain. Once you get to the top of the next mountain, you have to get the guardians of the lightning field to accept you.

If they don’t accept you, Jock went on, then you will get launched a long way away into a swamp in Dunalley. If you don’t get out of the swamp fast enough, you’ll be eaten by a frog with seven eyes. But escaping the deadly swamp won’t be easy. It looks like a chocolate milkshake, but it is full of chicken poo, and duck poo, and clumps of cow poo. It’s juicy. I once had a sip of it, but I got extreme food poisoning – I pooed and vomited at the same time.

He stopped talking, and we waited.

I’m busy now, Jock said, but I’ll meet you on the other side of the tower. Drive around, and I’ll be waiting when you get there.

We set off. I stopped when Rocky saw another zombie chicken standing on the side of the road. I’ve never seen another zombie chicken before.

Hi, Big John. Hi, Rocky, the chicken said.

Hi, I said. How do you know us?

I’m Jock.

How did you get here?

I had scrocks on my feet and put them in four-wheel-drive mode, said Jock.

You put your scrocks on four-wheel-drive mode? That must have been a painful experience?

Yeah! It felt like a rocket coming out my bum.

Ouch! That would have hurt, I said.

Yeah! It did, said Jock.

What is that on your arm? Rocky asked.

It’s a robotic arm so I can put my scrocks in four-wheel-drive mode. Anyway, we need to get to this lightning field.

Get in.

We all bunched into the car, but it wasn’t a good fit.

I’m going to get a bigger car, I said. It’s going to be a Nissan Patrol with an LSA supercharged motor. It should have one thousand horsepower so I can go anywhere I want. It should be so cool. I can go to space if I wanted to...

But we need to get to the lightning field now, Jock said.

Jock, you said there are lightning guardians?

It’s not going to be easy, said Jock.

Yes, I said. I know it won’t be easy because of the trip there.

And the frog, Jock said.

Yes, but I know that I can hypnotize the frog. Then I can make him go to sleep. After that, Rocky can make the lightning gun and create a new portal. He can do that because of his hundred IQ brain.

Ok, said Jock. Let’s head there.

On our way to the lightning field, we stopped at Big Burger to get some burger fries. Jock said we needed fries to survive in the lightning field. We also wanted burger colas.

I looked at the menu. Sometimes, I think of eating people because they eat our kind.

But we need to protect all humans, Big John, Jock said, because of the aliens, mushmen, dragons and other things. We can’t eat humans.

But they look fat, I said. Think of all the meat on their bodies. Yum, yum, yum.

We talked about eating –and not eating– humans all the way.

Well, they should thank us for not eating them, I said. We are so capable of that. Imagine all the human legs...

Jock was wrong. Getting to the lightning field was easy. And Rocky made the lightning gun without any trouble once I handed over the four shards I had collected.

Now it’s time to activate the lightning gun, I said.

A purple portal opened in front of us. Rocky told me that the gun used up all the shards, but I wasn’t worried.

Ok, let’s jump through the portal.

Chapter 6

I’M GONNA GET OUT–– Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I’m falling through the sky––

Jock, Rocky, and I landed in the sea.

There are lightning fish! said Jock. Swim to land. It will be a bit better if we’re not in the water when we find them.

We made it to land.

Pickle, pickle, pickle, banana, pickle, banana. I’m a ban-pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, banana. Banana, pickle, pickle, banana banana. Look at me! I’m a pickle-bana. So I look in the planetree. There no kiwi and nanapickle...

This tree just turned up and it was singing. Pickle, banana, coconut, watermelon, banana, nana-na, na nana nana na nana, nana-na. Hey, gravy. Oh, oh, oh, chips and gravy! Oh, oh, oh, chips and gravy! Sometimes I don’t feel like I have any arms. I’m a blobby girl, in a blobby world...

Whoa! That tree loves to sing lots of songs, I said.

I’m going to head off now to find the lightning fish, said Jock.

I went with Jock. Rocky came with me, and there were lots of lightning fish. The lightning fish had portals hanging from their head like the bait on an angler fish.

This one looks interesting, Jock said. It’s a bluey brown colour.

I looked. The portal was purple, with a lightning line around the edge. It made a funny noise like a duck with a harmonica in its mouth. We got ready to jump.

Here we go!

We followed Jock through the lightning fish portal.

Ok, this portal’s a bit different.

It’s a different world, said Rocky.

I like it, I said. I’m going to explore.

I’m going back while this portal is open, said Jock.

Jock disappeared.

It’s just you and me, Rocky.

There are no shards here, Big John, Rocky said.

After a while, we jumped through the portal.

Hey, Jock! It’s Big John! I’m back!

Jock was nowhere to be seen.

Use your scanner to find Jock? I told Rocky.

He’s not here, Big John, said Rocky.

There’s another lightning fish. I’m going to jump in the portal.

Rocky followed me through the portal. We saw something shiny.

Ok, a shard. I think I want to explore a bit more... Hmm, I can see another shard. We can come back for this one. Ok, Rocky. I need you to use your recon scanner so we can see if there are any threats around here. We don’t have Jock to tell us.

Rocky and I jumped from portal to portal until we were back where you started.

I’m going to call up Donny.

Ring a ding, ding.

Donny.

Mate, it’s Big John.

Wassup?

Can you bring me a bigger hovercraft as fast as possible?

Ok, mate, said Donny. I’ll bring a nuclear bomber hovercraft to you. It’s the best of the best. You should be able to fly around those portals without stopping. But you owe me some alien ice cream. It’s so good.

I know, right. How many aliens can you fit in your tummy?

How many ice cream cones can you fill if you capture an alien ship?

I’m going to need a lot of ice cream scoopers...

I’ll call the ice cream man, said Donny. You’ll need a lot of ice cream trucks.

Rocky and I played a video game while we