The Journey

By Nokwanda Khumalo-Mokwebo

I have written this book not to share with you my life story – it is not a detailed autobiography – but to share a glimpse of the journey I have travelled to get to where I am today. I am writing this book with hope that someone might relate to it and realise that, though our stories are different, we all go through darker phases in our lives, and that they are not supposed to be the end of us. There is hope out there.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Nokwanda Khumalo-Mokwebo
• Release date: Oct 19, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005382513

Book preview

The Journey

WHEN THE SPIRIT TALKS

PHINDILE NOKWANDA KHUMALO-MOKWEBO

Copyright © 2021 Phindile Nokwanda Khumalo-Mokwebo

First edition 2021

Published by Phindile Nokwanda publishing at Smashwords

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or any information storage or retrieval system without permission from the copyright holder.

The Author has made every effort to trace and acknowledge sources/resources/individuals. In the event that any images/information have been incorrectly attributed or credited, the Author will be pleased to rectify these omissions at the earliest opportunity.

Published by Phindile Nokwanda Khumalo-Mokwebo using

Reach Publishers’ services,

Edited by Caroline Webb for Reach Publishers

Cover designed by Lambent The Kreative

P O Box 1384, Wandsbeck, South Africa, 3631

Website: www.reachpublishers.org

E-mail: [e-mail]

Table of Contents

Acknowledgements

Preface

The Beginning

The Illness

The Question of Faith

The Voice in my Spirit

The Rebirth

Healing, Learning and Growing

Are We Lost?

Through My Eyes

Prologue

Acknowledgements

First and most importantly I want to thank God; the Almighty is the foundation of this book and a lot in my life.

I thank my mother, Portia Mokwebo, for believing in me and always reminding me that I am capable of this and more in life; every child deserves a mother like her. She is the epitome of motherhood and I always pray to be more of the mother that she is – our god on earth she remains.

I thank my family for being there throughout the writing of this book.

I must mention my babies – my learners – who always give me reason to soldier on and always tell me they are waiting for the book.

A great deal of appreciation goes to the wife, my best friend Tshepiso Motsoeneng. This woman has kept me grounded since day one of the fall to day one of the rise, and she has been a force in making sure that this book gets published.

Special thanks must go to daddy, my mentor Nhlanhla Matona. His constant check-ins on my progress is I needed to finally get up and do this, and his patience and guidance awoke the best in me.

To my kids, Siphesihle, Siyamthanda, Sphiwokuhle – thank you for giving me reason to create an empire and legacy. I love and appreciate each of you.

Lastly, I acknowledge my late father – even in his absence he has played a great role in my life. His teachings have a permanent place in my life. He is the star of a story I will forever tell.

Preface

I have written this book not to share with you my life story – it is not a detailed autobiography – but to share a glimpse of the journey I have travelled to get to where I am today. I am writing this book with hope that someone might relate to it and realise that, though our stories are different, we all go through darker phases in our lives, and that they are not supposed to be the end of us. There is hope out there.

There is a life in abundance that each of us can have and embrace without feeling greedy because God loves us all enough that He wants all the good things for us. We mainly keep these good things far from us and out of reach because we either lack faith or we are misguided by those around us and what we are exposed to. I have recently realised how much lack of knowledge can lead you into making misinformed decisions, and so wanted to share my spiritual journey with you.

In sharing my journey, I am not saying our paths are the same. I am saying that the human being is formed of different aspects, and only when you understand all of them and find balance in all can you experience the kind of peace I have at the time of finally writing this book (a book I have been writing and throwing away for ages). For me, the peace came with acknowledging the presence of God in my life and accepting Jesus Christ as my saviour. So bear with me when I keep referring to the core and driver of my entire existence because that is where I draw my strength from to sit and pour my heart into these pages.

There is a word for you somewhere in these pages. Read on and you will find it, and it will be the push you have needed to finally take that step to changing your life, to building that project you have been dreaming about. My learners know I always say: "If your dreams do not keep you awake at night and scare you, go back to your drawing board because they are not big enough."

This is one dream that has kept me awake for years, and as I had promised many it is finally happening, and for that I thank God for sending my guardian angel in human form – my mentor. It is the best of us who are fortunate enough to find mentorship in the form of what we are called for in life.

Have a great reading. God loves you dearly and He wants all the beautiful things for you. His promises remain Yes and Amen.

The Beginning

I am Phindile Nokwanda Khumalo-Mokwebo. I come with two surnames from birth and no, my mother’s surname is not mentioned here; that is a story for another day. I am the second child to both my parents and probably the most hard-headed if not downright naughty. I have seven siblings, six sisters and one brother. I was born in Eswatini, then known as Swaziland; that is where the blind years of my childhood were spent. Of course, I have memories of our stay there, which shocks my mom because we left when I was only five years old. The family moved to Tembisa on the East Rand (South Africa) to stay with my father who worked this side. It was a place that became home and would later be my nightmare.

My mother says when she was pregnant with me she wanted a son, but my father was completely against it, saying a boy child would be as naughty as he had been growing up. The man spent most of the remaining years of his life after my birth wishing I had been the boy my mom wanted, because not only did I look like him but I was also the worst kind of a girl child. I literally reminded him of himself and he raised me like the boy my mom wanted. The chores I got at home were ones you would give to a boy child, things like gardening, minding the yard and being sent out to the shops far from home.

Well, growing up in Tembisa was a daily adventure because there were plenty of us on the streets and we all came from different backgrounds and cultures. House number 322 Mqantsa Section, Tembisa 1632, was home. This is where we made memories as a family and had friends. From this part of our lives until he passed on, my dad was the greatest father. He took care of his children and loved his wife. We are fortunate to have experienced their love story, both from the time when he was working and could provide to when he had nothing, because even when there was no food on our table, love was always served. Our parents loved each other, and they loved us.

For years we stayed in this house, and I was forever in trouble with my father because I attracted trouble everywhere – at school, in the streets and at home. My cousin Jozie and I had the greatest of times stealing sweets from the local filling station. We’d run from his mother’s place to my parents’ or the other way, depending on where there was no beating waiting for us on that day. We have been tight since childhood; even the years when we were apart did nothing to weaken the bond we share. We still make the best tag team, but we are grown-ups now, the hustle is different, and we look forward to better days.

Before my 11th birthday my father lost his job and we had to move to what was going to be our permanent residence in the rural settlements of Kwa-Ndebele. That is where our family has been ever since. Life here was the complete opposite of what we had in Tembisa. This is where we learnt what poverty is. Both my parents were unemployed; my dad started a vegetable garden because we had a big yard, and we all worked in it, making sure it produced because for years that is where our next meals would come from.

To help my family have food and essentials when I was in Grade 5, I was selling scones baked by either one of my parents at school. The teachers really supported my business and because I have always had high energy levels, I carried it out well. I always tell my learners that confidence goes a long way because even when we did not have enough money for me to be in uniform like the other children, my personality was able to hide it and we were never labelled as poor. The teachers always came through for me – offering to get me a proper uniform and stationery – especially because of my good grades and being naughty; I was hard to miss in class.

My siblings and I used to be on the streets, knocking on doors house to house, selling the produce from our garden. It’s an experience I do not wish on any child because people can be mean, from battling against children making fun of you on the streets to adults who were just rude. I would wonder what was so difficult in saying No, thank you and letting you move to the next house. Of course, there were the houses with angels – the ones where you knew something will be bought even if it is just a bag of tomatoes; you just know you will not walk away with nothing. We all had those houses and my father also had his because he would ride on his bicycle to other neighbourhoods. It is safe to say many people knew my father, meaning you could