Modeling the Heavenly Father to Earthly Children: A Thoroughly-Incomplete Guide for Christian Dads
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Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth …” (Lk. 10:21 NIV) Jesus called God his Father, and he taught his followers to think of God as their Father too, saying, “This, then, is how you should pray: ‘Our Father in heaven …’ ” (Mt. 6:9 NIV)
The Scripture describes our Father God as loving and compassionate, just yet gracious, merciful and forgiving. But what if hearing the words “Father in heaven” evokes in our children’s minds negative images from adverse experiences they have had with their own fathers on earth? As explained in MODELING THE HEAVENLY FATHER TO EARTHLY CHILDREN, we Christian dads, as well as grandfathers and other influential male adults, have the responsibility and privilege to raise our boys and girls, sons and daughters of all ages, in such a way as to give them an accurate and positive understanding of who God really is. We do this by emulating and modeling divine attributes like justice and abhorrence of evil, but also kindness, wisdom, communication, compassion, and most certainly love. This will take dedication and perseverance; nonetheless, we must rise to this challenge, for our kids will be watching us and learning about what “heavenly Father” really means.
Kevin Anthony Keating
Kevin Anthony Keating has worked as a teacher in fifteen countries around the world. He is also author of MUSTARD SEED: A Story of Jesus’ Little Sister (written under a pen name) and of THE HANDS OF JESUS: A Scriptural and Pictorial Devotion and Meditation.
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Modeling the Heavenly Father to Earthly Children - Kevin Anthony Keating
Copyright © 2020 Kevin Anthony Keating.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by
any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying,
recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system
without the written permission of the author except in the case
of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
WestBow Press
A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan
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Bloomington, IN 47403
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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or
links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may
no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those
of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher,
and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are
models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy Bible, New
International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica,
Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.
zondervan.com The NIV
and New International Version
are trademarks
registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™
Scripture quotations marked (NASB) taken from the New
American Standard Bible® (NASB), Copyright © 1960, 1962,
1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman
Foundation Used by permission. www.Lockman.org
Scripture quotations marked (ESV) are from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible,
English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing
ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-6642-0952-7 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-6642-0951-0 (e)
WestBow Press rev. date: 01/14/2022
To my dad, JDK, who modeled for me much good
All profits from the royalties for this book will be donated to the
charitable organizations Save the Children (savethechildren.
org) and Doctors Without Borders (doctorswithoutborders.org).
CONTENTS
Section 1: Introductory Comments
Introduction
Twofold Goal
An Added Benefit
Genuine, Natural Modeling Of God
The Fruit Of The Spirit
An Objection Preemptively Addressed
Sculpturing: A Simple Metaphor
Which Attributes?
Characteristics Not Covered
Hard Questions About The God Of The Bible
The Infinite And The Finite: A Caveat
Not All Children Will Respond As We Hope For
Adverse Effects Of Negatively Modeling God
The Job Our Own Fathers Did
A Personal Note Of Failure
A Message To Both Women And Men
For Those Who Are Not Parents
This Book Is NOT …
A Note On Pronoun Usage & Capitalization
Section 2: Jesus And Modeling The Heavenly Father
Jesus’ Command To Be Like The Father: God Models, We Emulate
Seeing The Father In The Son: Jesus As The Example Of Modeling God
The Sequence Of Modeling Restated
Understanding And Modeling God By Inference
God’s Character In The Beatitudes
The Parable Of The Prodigal (Wasteful) Son: God’s Welcoming Love
Jesus And Children
Section 3: Modeling God’s Omni
Attributes & Essential Character
The Omni
Attributes Of God
God Is …
: The Essential Character Of God
The Oneness Of God
Thrice Holy
Creative
Section 4: Some Attributes Of The Heavenly
Father For Christian Dads To Model To Children
Introduction
- Allows Free Will
- Altruistic
- Appreciative Of Work
- Attentive & Responsive
- Aware Of Self-Identity
- Bestows Blessings
- Calm & Slow To Anger
- Cannot Be Bribed
- Champion Of The Poor And Needy
- Communicative
- Compassionate
- Defends The Unborn And Their Mothers
- Desires True Godliness, Not Mere Religious Observance
- Disciplinarian
- Ethical & Uncompromising
- Exercises Authority
- Expressive Of Praise
- Faithful
- Focuses On The Heart, Not On Outward Appearances
- Forgiving
- Friend
- Giving
- Good
- Gracious
- Guide
- Hardworking
- Hates Evil
- Healer
- Helper
- Hesed
- Honest / Keeps Promises
- Involved Actively
- Jealous & Zealous
- Judge
- Just
- Kind
- Liberal Or Conservative?
- Maintains The Honor Of His Name
- Merciful
- Nature Lover
- Not Proud / Able To Change Course
- Openminded
- Optimist (Jeremiah 29:11 – One View)
- Planner (Jeremiah 29:11 – Another View)
- Prioritizes The Spiritual
- Proactive
- Promotes Moderation In Eating & Drinking
- Protective
- Provider
- Rational / Reasonable
- Refuge
- Relational
- Repairer
- Righteous
- Rock, Redeemer, & Savior
- Rule Maker / Rule Modifier
- Sacrificial
- Shepherd (The 23Rd Psalm)
- Source Of Joy
- Strong
- Teacher
- Upholds Integrity
- Warrior
- Welcoming To The Foreigner
- Will Not Abandon
- Wise
- Wishes Good, Not Ill, On Others
- YHWH, The Lord
- YHWH – Some Combined Names & Titles
Section 5: Conclusion
Risk And Reward
Review Of The Goal And A Final Reminder
Section 1:
INTRODUCTORY COMMENTS
002_a_xxx.jpgINTRODUCTION
Jesus said, I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth …
(Lk. 10:21 NIV)
Jesus called God his Father time and again. And he taught his followers to think of God as their Father too, saying, This, then, is how you should pray: ‘Our Father in heaven …’
(Mt. 6:9 NIV)
The Scripture describes our Father God as loving and compassionate, just yet gracious, merciful and forgiving. But what if the word father
evokes fear and loathing in the hearts and minds of children? What if hearing the words Father in heaven
reminds kids of all the negative experiences that they have had with their own fathers on earth?
What can we as earthly dads do to ensure that our children have a positive idea of our heavenly Father? How can we present a constructive view of our Father in heaven to our kids (of all ages!) here on earth? How can we make certain that our boys and girls get the image of God as a Father who is ever welcoming and good?
As followers of the LORD, we Christian fathers – as well as biological and adoptive parents, legal guardians, and really any adult males who have positions of influence on children, including uncles and grandfathers - have the responsibility and privilege to raise our sons and daughters in such a way as to give them a clear and accurate understanding of who God really is. We do this by emulating and modeling, with our limited abilities, divine attributes that reflect the true nature of God – characteristics like justice and abhorrence of evil, but also kindness, wisdom, understanding, communication, compassion, and most certainly love.
It goes without saying that there are some divine attributes that we will never be able to really emulate, namely, all the LORD’s omni
characteristics: omnipotence, omnipresence, omniscience, etc. And actually, we will fall decidedly short in our comparably feeble attempts to demonstrate any of God’s qualities, for God is infinite in all ways, and we as finite beings will never be able to offer anything even remotely close to a full picture of who God is.
However, the very anthropomorphic presentation of God in the Scripture allows us to identify traits easily recognizable to humans. After all, we are created in God’s likeness. So, it behooves us, for our kids’ sakes, to devote ourselves to the task of giving them an accurate idea of who God really is. This will take dedication and perseverance. We will for sure fail to do complete justice to the nature of God, and at times our children will not respond in ways as we might expect or want. Nonetheless, we must carry on, for the goal is worth the effort. If we can at least intimate something of God’s character to our kids through our own actions, we will have done our job.
We must rise to this challenge; our children will be watching us and learning about what heavenly Father
really means.
Note: To reiterate what I stated earlier in this segment, though I use the words fathers and dads
throughout this book, I’m also referring to any adult male who is in a place of influence for children, including relatives like grandfathers and uncles or others such as coaches, teachers, and pastors, and who also has a personal relationship with the LORD God. These people have the responsibility to model the true character of the heavenly Father.
TWOFOLD GOAL
The basic goal of modeling God’s attributes to children is twofold, both of great importance:
1. To help give them an accurate understanding of the true nature of God, their heavenly Father.
2. For our sons and daughters to see and then to emulate in their own lives that trait exhibited by their dads and other males, and thus develop into individuals of godly character – in brief, to become more like their Father in heaven.
Of course, we must remember that in modeling God’s attributes we are offering to our children just a mere reflection and an ultimately inadequate imitation of Him. The only way for boys and girls to really know God and to comprehend His love for them is to enter personally into a relationship with Him, i.e., to become true spiritual children of the heavenly Father. This should be our priority – leading children into a knowledge of God. So, let us keep guiding their focus not toward us here on earth but toward the One whose character we seek to emulate, the LORD.
AN ADDED BENEFIT
As we fathers model God’s attributes to our children, we will not only provide them with a real-life example of the LORD’s nature but will also experience the additional benefit of developing God’s character in our own lives. The more we seek to think and talk and act like our heavenly Father, the closer we will align ourselves with His very nature. Indeed, we are commanded to emulate His nature: Be holy because I, the LORD your God, am holy.
(Lev. 19:2 NIV) Of course, we will never fully mirror who God is and can never really hope even to approximate the perfect character of our Father in heaven, but it is a worthy ideal for which we earthly parents can, however imperfectly, strive.
Yet, we also need to acknowledge that we can only even attempt to do this as the Holy Spirit of God enables us. Without His strength and guidance, we are entirely helpless to accomplish any real spiritual progress. Thus, with God’s grace and only through the power of His Holy Spirit, modeling His traits will foster the growth of those same characteristics in us and allow us to lead more godly lives to His glory.
Providing a model of the LORD is a commendable goal; however, we fathers are ourselves children of God, and our own personal aim should be to become more like our heavenly Father as we grow spiritually, not just for our children’s sake, but for our own relationship with God. So, let us pursue both objectives in our lives: Developing godly character in ourselves and modeling it for our sons and daughters.
GENUINE, NATURAL
MODELING OF GOD
The goal described in this book is for dads and others to model the heavenly Father’s attributes to our children. However, this should not be an insincere or forced kind of activity. Instead, it should be altogether genuine and should happen naturally. How? By getting to know the LORD, growing closer to Him day by day and experiencing His constant loving presence. As the psalmist sang, Taste and see that the LORD is good.
(Ps. 34:8 NIV)
Through prayer, meditation, study, and uniting our spirit with His Holy Spirit, we will develop a strong and intimate relationship with God, one that we will cherish and that will truly bring us joy. With time and practice, the LORD’s character, His nature, and His traits will become more and more an inherent part of who we are, and as a result, we won’t have to push or falsely require ourselves to display God’s characteristics; rather, they will organically and unaffectedly emanate from the innermost core of our being outwardly to those around us as we welcome and embrace our heavenly Father’s living in and with and through us.
That will produce real modeling of God.
THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT
… be filled with the Spirit (Eph. 5:18 NASB)
… walk by the Spirit … the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control;
(Gal. 5:16, 22-23 NASB)
Let me emphasize here that to model any of the LORD’s attributes, in however limited a way, we need to absolutely rely on the power of the Holy Spirit of God. Emulating God’s qualities is not something that we can do through our own determination or strength; rather, it requires us in honesty and humility to submit ourselves to the will and working of God in our lives.
Without the Spirit of the LORD, our natural inclinations are to promote our own agenda and to live for self. The result is that instead of God’s morality and purity, we tend to be immoral and impure; rather than living in God’s peace and harmony, our relationships are marked by enmity and strife; we exhibit anger and lack of restraint as opposed to God’s calmness and tenderness; our speech is argumentative and polarizing, not reflecting God’s desire for understanding and unity; we are jealous when others do well, not happily acknowledging the divine blessing on their lives. Thus, if we seek to model God’s attributes relying solely on our own efforts, we will end up frustrated and feeling guilty at our inability to emulate our heavenly Father to our children.
But if we allow the Spirit of God to live in us, yielding control to Him, heeding His words and following His guidance, we will see the natural growth of the LORD’s character start to manifest itself in our words and deeds: God’s traits of love, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, and gentleness – His fruit – will become evident to those around us, including our children.
So, once again, it must be stressed that in order to even begin to attempt to realize the goal of modeling the true nature of the LORD God, we have to first yield our wills to that of the Father, echoing the words of Jesus, not My will but Yours be done
(Lk. 22:42 NASB) and allow God’s Spirit to fill our lives with His presence, to lead us by speaking through His word in our minds and hearts, and by His power to develop in us the character of God we seek to model to our kids.
AN OBJECTION PREEMPTIVELY
ADDRESSED
An objection may arise that to develop godly character, our children should look to the heavenly Father, not to their earthly dads. Critics will say that it is the attributes of God that kids should strive to emulate, not the qualities of parents. Some people might complain that the model of behavior to imitate is that of the LORD, not of Dad or anyone else. Agreed, 100%. Look to the heavenly Father, strive to emulate God, imitate the LORD. The point in encouraging fathers and others to model the divine attributes to our children is to give our boys and girls a real-life, flesh and blood example of some aspects of who and how God is and what it means to know and follow Him.
Further protestation could be made that Jesus gave us a real-life, flesh and blood example of who and how God is. He is the earthly representation of the Father, not a parent or anyone else, and we should follow Jesus’ lead. Again, agreed 100%. (See later section on Jesus and Modeling the Heavenly Father.
) But Jesus is with us now through the Scripture and in the Spirit, while fathers are with their children in person, bodily in the here and now, someone kids can physically see and touch and hear and interact with. Parents are the initial and primary reference that children have for what this existence is all about, and as such, we dads and moms can have an unequaled impact during the earliest years of our children’s lives.
So, as I said previously, model God’s attributes to help children have a better and more accurate image of who He truly is and to assist them in becoming moral individuals aligned with the LORD’s nature, but ultimately, keep directing their attention, their eyes and ears, hearts and minds, to the heavenly Father. Knowing Him personally is the highest goal.
004_a_xxx.jpgSCULPTURING: A SIMPLE METAPHOR
As we consider modeling God, it might be helpful to compare it with sculpturing.
In carved sculpturing, sculptors start with a block of material, say a medium like marble. With their eyes on the model, maybe a drawing or a live model, the sculptors then begin to shape the stone by cutting or chiseling or sanding it. In a sense, the sculptors remove anything which does not resemble the model.
In this aspect of our metaphor, God is both our initial model and active sculptor, and we are both medium and co-sculptor. As co-sculptors, we see the character and attributes of God, our model, revealed in the universe and in the Scripture, and through the transforming power of God’s spirit, we join with the LORD to remove bit by bit anything in our lives, our medium here, that does not resemble the model.
This requires first that we carefully study the model so that we can more accurately shape the medium to the desired result. For us fathers, that means intently studying God’s characteristics in the Scriptures, knowing God’s attributes through His creation, and understanding God’s nature by prayer and meditation. It also demands that we continually look at our own lives and allow God to reveal and to shape areas that need change, and then commit ourselves to the process of removing from our lives that which does not resemble the character of God.
Actual sculpturing also requires adding material to the work of art, like putting more clay on the sculpture to be molded into the appropriate form. Similarly, modeling God requires not only removing but also building on: As we dads seek to emulate the character of God, we will need to incorporate into our own lives divine aspects that we do not naturally possess, such as His mercy, kindness, justice, and holiness, all active virtues that must be developed and exercised through the LORD’s strength in a lifelong process. They don’t happen by themselves but must be sought after and worked on day after day, year after year as we yield ourselves to Him.
In modeling God for our children, as we dads emulate the character of God and become more like Him, our kids will take note and better understand the true nature of our heavenly Father. As that occurs, we pray that it will lead our sons and daughters to the ultimate goals – not just knowing about the LORD, but actually accepting His grace and forgiveness, experiencing His real, constant, powerful presence, growing in relationship with Him, developing His character in their lives, and living eternally together with Him.
Let the sculpting begin!
WHICH ATTRIBUTES?
To start, let me clarify that I use various words to describe who and how God is, such as aspects, attributes, character and characteristics, features, nature, qualities, and traits, and though these words have nuanced differences in meaning, I utilize them synonymously throughout this book. Additionally, I write of what God does, His actions and interactions with His creation. The general term that I most frequently employ in this book to describe who God is and what he does is "attributes."
Which attributes have I chosen to emphasize in this book? As an infinite being, God’s attributes are endless. Also, the Bible is a long, intricate collection of diverse books. It would be impossible to present all of God’s characteristics, so I have selected salient aspects of God’s nature which we as parents might focus on to model for our children in order to help them understand God more clearly. Readers will surely think of other attributes which I have not included, and that is great! As aspects of God come to mind, add them to areas which you feel ought to be modeled to our children.
I have selected Scriptural verses from both the Tanakh, the Jewish Bible which