A Eulogy to a Tragedy

By Harris Hazim

This book is the physical manifestation of the grief that haunts him during the day.
A compilation of the late-night thoughts that stole his sleep.
It is the demons of his mind that were sealed in this book.
It is the devils of his heart that were banished into this book.
The darkest thoughts, given form, and deathly musings, given life. 
The hymns of a broken soul.
The unsavoury and immoral lust for flesh.
The unwilling penitence for the sin of love.

Dive into deep into the void, succumb to the abyss, where the deprivation of love, the disapproval from society, dissatisfaction with oneself, discontentment with others, and how religious beliefs, corrupts what once a jovial individual, into a twisted and malevolent being.
Even so, to him, this is indeed the liberation of his soul.

This is the book, which reveals true vulnerability, cloaked under false strength.

A story laced tearfully into a collection of poems and prose, of repressed desires and forbidden love, a burden of carrying a disease deemed to be a taboo, and of recurring haunting wishes, for suicide and death.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing Singapore
• Release date: Mar 27, 2020
• ISBN: 9781543757330

Harris Hazim

An everyday individual whom you cross paths with, carrying tales of the unorthodox. He, who has been silenced, knowingly and unknowingly by the whispers of his thoughts. Now, an Advocate & Solicitor, he wishes to bring the voice of freedom to that silence. Unbottling his anguish, ready to be read by the ones who lay their hands on this book, to experience the sorrow in every line, in every word.

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Copyright © 2020 by Harris Hazim.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

www.partridgepublishing.com/singapore

CONTENTS

Chapter Of Love

Chapter Of Grief And Death

Chapter Of Random Musings

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CHAPTER OF LOVE

I have never been sad about goodbyes, because I’ve never thought that I

mattered to the people I left behind.

But you gave me another feeling for goodbyes.

It is fear, but not from the separation;

fear of you not missing me at all.

Waiting and waiting.

You overstayed your welcome in the lost and found basket.

Waiting and waiting.

Now you’re ushered to the disposal bin,

Did you honestly believe that you were mistakenly misplaced?

I have been a hopeless romantic for so long, that the hopelessness has made me jaded to the brink of hostile scepticism in pondering the idea of love.

But once in a while, I will have that spark again, to desire, to love.

I’ve learnt much from the past to not show it too much.

But I have always been a person who’s a tad too much.

Didn’t you at least notice, how hard I was falling for you?

Guess not, you only noticed my heartbroken face.

Why can’t you see my feelings for-…

Hey, what’s wrong?

Oh, it’s nothing.

They say that if you lose someone, but found yourself, you’ve won.

But I lost myself again when I found you, look what you’ve done.

I’m that sad, hon.

He said she is the nicest person he has ever met.

With a smile, he expressed his gratitude.

I said, you’re welcome.

I looked away; eyes glistened with tears.

Helping others when it comes to love affairs,

has now become one of my fears.

When he looked at me and chuckled,

I knew I was lost.

When he looked at her and smiled,

I knew I have lost.

It hurts me that I was his entertainment,

and she was his amazement.

I remember that day when you confided to me for comfort.

A friend you’ve known for years did not reciprocate your love.

I looked beyond the windows.

Voice is shaken by grief, you said: I wish she would love me.

I looked at him fondly, I wanted to say it was okay.

Unconsciously I told him,

I’d hoped you did too.

She is still whom he adores forevermore.

And we aren’t friends anymore.

Sometimes I really wish I was reborn immediately in a different body,

born in this day and age,

at this exact time,

at this moment beside you,

but at the opposite end of nature’s spectrum.

Because it has always been the lore and law of this world that,

opposites attract.

Then maybe, just maybe, I finally have a chance.

A chance, I am willing to take, to relive this life,

Just to have an opportunity, to be with you.

I saw you all alone, within walking distance,

though I am occupied, I still couldn’t resist from not approaching you.

I wanted to talk to you, to be just a few feet apart from each other;