Meltdown in Paradise

By Marisa De Maio

A collection of poems and essays written over the course of several months, discovering love, loss, hope, heartbreak, and everything in between.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Mar 19, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504983358

Marisa De Maio

I have always believed that our words and actions hold the power to impact those around us, so we must live life fully and purely. Notorious for feeling everything incredibly too deeply and making others’ pain my own, I pull my inspiration from personal experiences as well as the unfamiliarity I have found in others. I fell in love with writing for the way that it healed me.

Book preview

Meltdown

in

Paradise

Marisa De Maio

36314.png

AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2016 Marisa De Maio. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 04/29/2016

ISBN: 978-1-5049-8336-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5049-8335-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016903554

Print information available on the last page.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

This book is printed on acid-free paper.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

Introduction

He Found Me

Haunted

Good Girls

Living Contradiction

Authentic

Almost

Stay Away

Worth Living For

And So We Danced

Feel Something

My Baby

Summer’s Sun

We All

He Didn’t Say Good-bye

He Couldn’t Have

I Was Wrong

I Should Have Known

He Did Me A Favor

When You Kiss My Lips

Too Good To Him

Broken Heart

Wild Animal

If I Had Known

Envy

We Live In A World

I Am Yours

Simple Stare

The Fragrance

Come Back

Missing Me

Dreams Of You

Another Life

Justifications

Believer

See Me

False Fantasies

Letting You Go

Despite Your Flaws

Checkmate

Relapse

I Can Still

Devil In Disguise

Best-kept Secret

Poison

I’m Sorry

I Had You Once

Alone

Run

Nicky Arnstein

4:01A.M.

Can’t Stay Away

It Wasn’t Fair

Let’s Pretend

Trouble

When I Died

She’s Not Me

His Lips

Fear

This Man Of Mine

Naïve

Self-Control

Why We Do What We Do

Chameleon

The Same Man

When You’re Not Here

Simplicity

You Didn’t Notice

The Moment

My Favorite Part

The One That Got Away

You Promised

Lifesaver

Afraid

I Would Choose You

3:24A.M.

Dreaming Again

Selfless

Every Detail

Lost

Toxic Behavior

Inevitable

Can We Go Back

Thoughts Of You

If Only

Stupid

Incoherent

My Nicky Arnstein

Moved On

Please

Do Anything

Our Last

Limbo

Means Something

Beauty Comes From Pain

Holding Him Back

Numb

Will She Know?

Empty

Home

I Know You

Numb To Me

Last Kiss

Thorns

Everything

I Can’t Be

With You

He Isn’t The One

The One

He Wanted

My Drug

Breathe

How He Adored Her

Incompatible

That Look

In The Night

Everywhere

Awake

All I Wanted

The Way We Happened

Saving Grace

All Of Him

Tricks

Timeless

She Wanted

Heartbreak

Day 184

I Wonder

Johnny Depp

Bartenders And Musicians

Essence

The Way We Were

Cancer

I Saved Everything

Why

Endearing

Saved

Untouched

Cry

He Wasn’t Mine

Measure Of Love

Anchor

Always Losing

Over Thinking

My Truth

My Mind Plays Tricks

Everlasting

All We Will Never Be

Old Friend

Clumsy

He Asked Me

Dig

Wasn’t Me

Withdrawals

Your Tainted Love

Crown

Naked

Lips

He

Bees

Wasn’t Enough

Brighter Than The Sun

Trust

Back To Him

NYE

And So I Ran

Our Soul

Fate

3:35A.M.

He Used To

If My Writing Brought Him Back

Pretty Lies

Trust In God

Settle

Pieces Of Me

He Wanted A Lie

I Was Different

Change

Blind

Tortured

Don’t Ask Me

Pride

Easy

My Name

Quicksand

Storms

Talk Less, Listen More

Exclusive Soul

Thoughtful

He’ll Come

Two Lovers

Forgive Me

Bad With Goodbyes

Him

Know This

Closing

You were my one-way ticket to a meltdown in paradise.

For the recovering heartbroken,

For those who inspired these words–may you forever remain unknown,

And, most importantly,

For my mother,

Thank you for everything.

Please know that I have been broken and burned so many times, and the only thing that has brought me back on track after every downfall is writing.

It just has this way of healing my soul and bringing me back to life.

I write in order to survive.

Introduction

I encourage you to keep an open mind as you read the words left on these pages.

Every single last one of these words stems from pain, loss, love, and heartbreak. But just know that after every defeat, I have learned to live again.

I have a strong tendency to see things for what I want them to be, instead of what they actually are.

Some of these letters are just pure exaggerations of real-life events that have occurred, but have been altered through my imagination.

Some are dreams that jolted me out of my sleep.

Some are events that have been passed down to me by loved ones. Some of these experiences broke my heart and pained me beyond recognition. With that pain, I did all I knew to release it: write.

Other experiences have been memorized vividly, with every detail an exact replica of the life I have lived—moments that have meant something to me, as well as moments that will leave their mark on my heart for lifetimes to come.

It’s ironic actually; the people in my life will swear to you that I do not know love. They will insist that I have never felt it—I never held it in my hand, that I have never experienced it in any human form. Yet, each of these pieces were written straight from a hole in my heart that has yet to be closed, and quite frankly, I don’t know ever will be.

Life is all about growing, feeling, learning, and changing.

These pieces are all little fragments of suppressed feelings I have hidden, and been too afraid to face, and to show a single soul,

Until now.

There is such an importance in words, and I now take a comfort in sharing myself through my writing. Writing has healed me every single time destruction entered into my world. Writing is my safe haven, my escape from reality.

I believe God brings certain people into our lives strictly for our own lessons and pure inspiration, in order to better us for our future, and that knowledge has somehow healed me for the simple fact that the brokenness I have felt was for a reason. That reason being for my own lessons that I now will pass on to you.

I have found inspiration within the least deserving of places.

I hope my story is able to strike a chord within your soul. I pray that it inspires you to explore your own heart.

This came from my soul to enter into yours.

Find the words you are too afraid to say. I pray that once you find these words, you have the courage to say them. Say them out loud, say them again before it is too late; say them while you still have the time to do so.

Please know that every single word