Effective Family Management and Parenting

By Maimbolwa Muliwana

Families are important building blocks of societies where all - including leaders, managers, kings, queens, husbands, wives, fathers and mothers - were raised, yet societies are falling apart and hence failing to provide the necessary education, training and guidance to family members for the benefit of their societies. Most of the challenges pertaining to relationships, marriages, morality, beliefs, leadership and the like can be easily pointed back to families' foundational principles and culture.

 

This book will answer questions about effective ways of nurturing children, and what training should be provided by parents and guardians to children or family members.

 

This book will equip parents and guardians and also those intending to have families with effective ways of raising family members under appropriate Family Governance, Leadership and Management Systems. Hence, they will acquire knowledge about how to build strong, united and productive families that will have a positive impact on their societies for many decades to come.

This book will equip parents and guardians to be able to:

 

1. Raise responsible, reliable, kind and productive adults and citizens of their nations

 

2. Develop good character, attitudes, mindset and beliefs (of) in their children

 

3. Build strong, stable and safe families

 

The upbringing and foundation of family members has an impact, influence and bearing on their adulthood in their communities, workplaces, places of business, interpersonal relations, relationships and marriages. The foundation of a child should be carefully, strategically and lovingly laid with all patience and perseverance. Most parents and guardians lack appropriate knowledge and skills for this important task. Many bear children without (this) adequate preparation and hence leave children to grow carelessly, lacking guidance, and without mentorship, coaching, appropriate training, and education. The upbringing and foundational life of a person is as important as (or even more important than) a foundation of a house.

 

The Almighty has given parents and guardians the responsibility of raising children properly so that they may be good leaders, fathers, mothers, husbands, wives and service providers in their communities. Many parents and guardians are taking this mission lightly and are failing this serious and noble task. Hence, we have high moral degradation, high infant mortality rates, high criminal activities, high alcoholism and drug abuse/addiction, high incidences of violence, high rates of teenage pregnancies, and high incidences of mental illnesses.

"And all thy children shall be taught of the LORD; and great shall be the peace of thy children." (Isaiah 54:13)

 

The author wishes readers happy reading for their success!

 

"Transforming and impacting communities through effective family management and parenting."

• Language: English
• Publisher: MAIMBOLWA MULIWANA
• Release date: Aug 16, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201084288

Maimbolwa Muliwana

The author was born in a family of seven and has a humble background full of lessons and experience. He is both an Engineer and Development worker by profession. He has two sons namely Thabo and Tapelo.He has had various work responsibilities ranging from field work to Regional manager and Branch Manager Positions in two different Water and Sanitation Companies in Zambia. Currently he is the Country Coordinator of a Community Based Organization which he founded with likeminded individuals and this is focusing in Education, Community Empowerment, Health and Water & Sanitation thematic areas. He gained this knowledge, skills and experience from an International Donor Organization where he implemented various projects and helped various Zambia based NGOs to develop and implement projects, and sometimes chaired the Organization Projects Committee whose chair was on rotational basis. During this period he provided technical guidance to a number of Zambian based NGOs which thrived successfully in their community reach out programs and projects.He is also a trainer and through this skill and talent he has conducted “Relationships and Marriage” workshops in Zambia, South Africa and Lesotho. Many people‘s relationships and marriages had dramatic positive turn around. It is from such amazing impacts that many people have been requesting the author to write a book which would reach more than the ones he was reaching through workshops and Facebook posts.

Book preview

Effective Family Management and Parenting

Effective Family Management and Parenting

Maimbolwa Muliwana

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Copyright © 2021 Maimbolwa Muliwana

First edition 2021

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or any information storage or retrieval system without permission from the copyright holder.

The Author has made every effort to trace and acknowledge sources/resources/individuals. In the event that any images/information have been incorrectly attributed or credited, the Author will be pleased to rectify these omissions at the earliest opportunity.

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Published by Maimbolwa Muliwana using Reach Publishers’ services,

P O Box 1384, Wandsbeck, South Africa, 3631

Edited by Jane Goodfellow for Reach Publishers

Cover designed by Reach Publishers

Website: www.reachpublishers.org

E-mail: [e-mail]

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Maimbolwa Muliwana

[e-mail]

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Author Biography

1.  Introduction

2.  Development

2.1  Natural & Strategic Development

2.2  Principles Of Family Life

3.  Human Development

3.1  Upbringing Is Foundaton

3.2  Benefits Of Proper Upbringing

3.3  Mind, Heart & Body

3.4  Human Capacity Development (Hcd)

4.  Family Development

4.1  Importance Of Families

4.2  Family Development

4.3  Stable And Productive Families

5.  Nurturing Family Members

5.1  Unity In The Family

5.2  Family Culture

5.3  Positive Parenting

5.4  Conflict Resolution Management

6.  Importance Of Family Management & Parenting

Author Biography

Maimbolwa Muliwana comes from a humble background and grew up in a family of seven. His life has been full of lessons and experiences which he has translated into his teachings. He is an engineer and development worker by profession and the proud father to two sons, Thabo and Tapelo. He has been involved in family, marriage and relationship counselling and guidance and is passionate about helping others achieve happy relationships.

Maimbolwa has experience in a wide range of work responsibilities from field work to regional manager and branch manager positions in two different water and sanitation companies within Zambia. Currently, he is the Country Coordinator of a community-based organisation which he, along with other like-minded individuals, founded. This organisation focuses on education, community empowerment, health, water and sanitation. Maimbolwa gained the knowledge, skills and experience for this kind of work from his time with an international donor organisation where he put into effect various projects and had the opportunity to chair the organisation’s projects committee. During this period, he provided technical guidance to a number of Zambian based NGOs which thrived in their community outreach programmes and projects.

Maimbolwa has a great talent for mentorship and through this skill, he has conducted Relationships, Marriage, Family Management & Parenting workshops in various countries in Southern Africa. His work has helped many relationships and marriages achieve dramatic and positive turnarounds.  amazing results prompted requests that he write a book so that his knowledge could reach a wider audience and he could share information more efficiently and effectively than through short workshops and social media posts.

Chapter 1

Introduction

A family is an important yet neglected institution that should raise good husbands, wives, leaders, managers, community changers and service providers. It is the smallest unit or building block of any community and nation, and needs proper development, appropriate principles and values.

Many families are dysfunctional and are raising individuals that are failing in their various roles in life due to inadequate or lack of appropriate foundational training. What kind of graduates are families producing and releasing into marriages, institutions or communities? Persons lacking proper training in their families have contributed to unstable societies and many failed relationships and marriages.

Families are the most important units of society for raising children, educating and training them, and providing their needs, including social protection. Due to the pain of broken families and homes arising from failed relationships and marriages, our generation is raising abused, neglected, rejected, unhappy, angry and unkind children. This is a time bomb!

This book will equip parents and guardians to be able to:

• Raise responsible, reliable, kind and productive adults and citizens of their nations.

• Develop good character, attitudes, mindsets and belief systems in their children.

• Build strong, stable and safe families.

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:24, KJV)

The leaving in Genesis 2:24 is either graduating or actual leaving of a person that has graduated from family training and up-bringing. A man that leaves his father and mother should have successfully completed his parents’ training, coaching, mentorship and life guidance. Such a person should be properly taught, trained and equipped before they leave their parents. Age, teaching and training are determinant factors for leaving parents’ home. Such a one should have completed the Family Education and Training Curriculum. Unfortunately, many families are releasing persons into marriages with inadequate knowledge and skills. This book will promote the development and usage of Family Curriculum for individual and family development.

In the context and scope of this book, development refers to the process of growth and advancement, or good/positive change. This can be development of an idea, innovation, plan, book or policy, for example. This book focuses on human and family development in order to have productive, positive and well developed individuals and families that are contributing positively and productively to their communities, institutions and nations.

The title of this book refers to human-centred development, parenting and family management. Every other form of development should contribute towards human and family development, welfare, safety, security, social life and health. Economic development that does not contribute to human beings and various aspects of life is disqualified, as good change, advancement, or as development within the scope, focus and development definition is in this book and inspired scriptures (Bible). Human- and Family- centred Development is the foundational unit and level of development of communities and nations. Parenting has to be guided by the Most High through His wisdom, Word and Spirit by which He teaches children of parents and guardians or families that uphold His Family Management and Parenting Principles. No parenting can be effective without these principles that are laid down in inspired scriptures.

"And all thy children shall be taught of the LORD; and great shall be the peace of thy children." (Isaiah 54:13, KJV) 

Strong, united, productive and healthy family units lead to productive and healthy communities and countries. Everything starts at family and household level, and this book seeks to impact families positively for the benefit of communities, countries and our global village. The breaking down of family units, leaving no social protection structures for children, is as good as destroying communities and countries.

It is the role of families to transfer good inheritance (values, morals, good beliefs, culture, social economic statuses and resources) from themselves to upcoming generations through parenting, education, training, modelling, mentorship, coaching and way of life.

"A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just." (Proverbs 13:22, KJV)

This book is good for every mature person, persons intending to have families, parents, guardians, fathers, mothers, families, learners (learning institutions) and leaders (families, communities, religions, churches, institutions and nations), teachers, marriage/family counsellors, and social/development workers. The purpose of this book is to equip parents/guardians and those intending to form families with the appropriate knowledge, skills and strategies to nurture united, stable and productive families.

This book shall make reference to inspired scriptures (Bible) to learn from the Bible perspective about Effective Family Management and Parenting. All quotations shall be from the King James Version (KJV) Bible unless otherwise stated.

Chapter 2

Development

The development that shall be focused on in this chapter is human- and family-centred. Human and family-centred development is the most important among all other kinds (forms) of development. Everything else should be focused or channelled to build, develop, support, care and protect a human being and families. Any development that does not better or improve or secure the lives/wellbeing of human beings and families is not the development this book will focus on.

2.1 NATURAL & STRATEGIC DEVELOPMENT

There are both natural and strategic developments. This book will focus on strategic development and not on natural development.

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Figure 1: Natural and Strategic Development

Strategic development needs planning, implementation and monitoring. Human and family development in the strategic sense shall be guided from principles outlined in inspired scriptures (Bible). Inspired scriptures encourage us to operate like the human body that has a HEAD, HEART and many parts operating together for a common goal.

Human and Family-centred Development should be the most strategic with an understanding that a human being (or human resource) is the most important resource among all resources. During creation as indicated in inspired scriptures, God created a human being for His pleasure as the most important among all that He created in six (06) days. He made everything for the good of humankind. The Most High deeply loves humankind such that when humankind fell away from the relationship with the Most High, the Most High had to send His own Son to reconcile humankind to Him. Humankind, as the most important creation of God, was given dominion over everything by God. Humankind was made in the image of the Most High and no other creation was made like that.

The following are reasons humankind and family units should be the centre of development:

(a) A human being is the IMAGE of the Most High

(b) A human being is the TEMPLE of the Most High

(c) A family is a representation of the Church (Congregation) or family of the Almighty

(d) A family is a representation of the government/kingdom of the Most High

God loves every human being (His image and His temple) through which He can express His love, plans, truth and justice. God loves a family unit because it represents His church/family and government/kingdom. If any development is to please the Most High, it has to be human- and family-centred.

"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea,