8 Holistic Ways to Instantly Reduce Anxiety

By Deva Neely and Keslie Mack

Is anxiety holding you back?  Does it get in the way of your relationships, work, and even everyday mundane tasks?

 

This book was created to help deal with anxiety because we know how it feels to have it take over your life, but it doesn't have to rule your life!  Take back control, be proactive and learn some exercises that can help you stay calm in stressful situations, find calm when you are triggered, and help you stay present and focused when your brain and body declare war!  There are a variety of exercises from which to choose and all of them have helped us take back our life and live again!  Find the ones that work for you, practice them often, and share them to help others.

 

When anxiety hits it can feel like nothing will be normal again, but this book will help you take charge, heal and most definitely cope when anxiety rears its ugly head!

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Deva Neely
• Release date: Aug 14, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201198299

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

Get To Know Deva

MY NAME IS Deva and yes it is my actual birth name. For reals!

I have always identified myself with my voice!  Whenever someone asked which of my senses could I live without, I used to reply, all of them but my voice.   

I started singing at a very young age.  I showed musical ability at three years old when I would sit at the piano and plunk out known songs.  I then started singing along to them, and it is in those moments that a performer was born.  I started competing (and winning) at the age of 7, and I was hooked.  I represented my country singing in international competitions, singing in many parts of the world.

My childhood left me with minimal self-esteem, but I would do so proudly if you asked me to sing.  It was my solace, my passion, and it is what kept me sane through all the years of gas-lighting and abuse living with a narcissistic alcoholic father.

Fast forward to 2013, and the incidents that transpired forever changed my world.  On May 6, two intruders broke into my home with the intent to harm or kill me, leaving a weapon at the door should I have returned home mid-burgle.  On May 19, my brother Brenton died by suicide, choosing to die by laying down in front of a train.  I was diagnosed with PTSD, which resulted in lots of therapy, medications, and heartbreak.

These events alone would have brought anyone to their knees, but sadly, my story didn't end there. On January 3, 2015, I received a vile letter from my maternal grandmother, aunts, and uncles (8 out of 10 of them, to be precise) saying horrible things to me and ridiculing my PTSD diagnosis.  The very people who were supposed to love me unconditionally set a condition to their love.  I confronted my grandmother because I couldn't believe she would go along with such an appalling display of hate and deceit.  It turns out she did and when I told her that reading the letter was the first time in my life I truly wanted to die; I wanted the world to swallow me up, she told me I deserved what I got.

All of those events lead to a diagnosis of C-PTSD.  Therapy was bringing issues with my father's alcoholism and narcissism forward.  The realization that narcissists had surrounded me my entire life became overwhelming. 

Three weeks after receiving the letter, a paternal uncle decided to criticize and shame me publicly, telling everyone I deserved no compassion for I had shown none to my father.  His accusations were built on the lies my Dad had told him.  Hundreds of people saw his posts, and many came to my defense.  It wasn't until one of my university professors put him in his place trying to stand up for me that I indeed recognized the magnitude of what was happening, and I crumbled.  I went to work the next time only to have my students' parents approach me to hug me. They commented on how awful my uncle was to do what he did.  It is then that I realized just how many people saw my uncle airing his ugly, petulant opinions specifically intended to hurt me.

I managed to keep it all together until October 18, 2015!  The school where I was working was highly toxic and had been for years.  Our boss was abusive to all the women (she often spared the men), and she relentlessly would go after one person at a time.  It seemed to be my turn, and she chose to do it while I was away with students on a choir retreat.  I had a complete breakdown.  That was the end of me, and it was the beginning of my voice being silenced.

I spent years off work, in therapy, going to group therapies for suicide survivors, and trying to make sense of all the traumatic incidents that had happened within two years.  Every day was a struggle to stay alive!  I dealt with suicidal ideation and spent many days on suicide watch in various ways.  I was fighting for my life.  I didn't want to die, and yet, I didn't want to exist anymore.  It doesn't make sense to those who have never experienced those feelings, but that was my daily battle.

Fast-forward to January 2020!  At this point, I had spent a few years healing.  I moved out of the big city of Toronto to my hometown where I grew up - Elora.  It was the last place I remember ever being truly happy.  It was the best thing I could have done for myself because I settled in quickly.  I was on waiting lists for many trauma programs, and lucky for me, a spot finally opened up in one that happened to be in the next town over.  

My healing truly began with a group of the strongest, most amazing women I had ever come to know.  I made a vow after reading a woman's response on Facebook to the question asking everyone how long they had been dealing with PTSD.  Her answer was, Forty-three years and counting!  

I was stunned.  I decided at that moment that my story would be different.  I was going to do whatever it took to heal and move forward.  My journey had begun, and I was willing to try anything.  I did yoga, meditation, soul-coaching, did a course on angels, did my Reiki Level 1,