Juicy Uber: The Steamiest Stories and Controversial Insights from 6000+ Rides and 12,000+ Riders

By David N Marchese

Have you ever had an Uber or Lyft ride? Ever asked your driver about his or her crazy or steamy incidents. Of course, you have. I had these questions daily for the 3 years I drove for Uber.

Now, Juicy Uber gives you the best of the best and the worst of the worst - all kind

• Language: English
• Publisher: Exposure Press LLC
• Release date: Oct 19, 2020
• ISBN: 9781735502007

David N Marchese

David Marchese was raised in the NY City bedroom community of Westport CT. He got his BA Cum Laude from Washington & Lee University and his MA in Communications Theory at Syracuse University Newhouse School. He has lived in Lexington VA, Zurich Switzerland, Syracuse NY, New York City, Los Angeles and currently resides in Las Vegas. His business and pleasure travel have helped him observe the cultures, voices and social interaction of the people in 17 countries he has visited. Travel is a passion of his. Cooking is and has been his favorite pasttime since he was 8 years old. The two recent International Superior Product & Service awards for wineworldtours.com, his new wine, food and cultural arts travel tour company has enhanced his wine and food passion. As an Adjunct Professor for 25 years at Pepperdine University and Loyola Marymount University Hilton School of Business he taught Advertising Creativity and Marketing, Global Tourism Marketing and Infrastructure, Strategic Planning and Entrepreneurship. Education, and instilling "critical thinking" in the youth of America are community obsessions. For 20 years, David was Board Chairman of the H.A.R.C. Foundation, a 501c3 supporting the discovery and rewarding of Emerging Creative Artists. The Arts are his cultural inspiration. He is a New York Yankee and Los Angeles Laker fan, and wishes that he had more time for scuba, fly-fishing, landscape photography, and horseback riding - his outdoor interests. Although he has won 26 international creative writing, design and marketing awards over his career including the REX Award for Creative Marketing Excellence from Forbes Magazine, this is his first "book".

Book preview

Glossary of Terms: Some terms or descriptions may be new to you, so I thought an explanation or appropriate definition would be helpful.

Pool: when two or more independent riders (strangers) share a ride to help reduce the cost of the ride.

Gen Z: Those people born between 1995 and 2010 (so their age would now be between 16 and 24.)

Millennials: Those born between 1981 to 1996 (so their age would be between 25 and 39.)

Gen X: Those born between 1965 and 1980 (so their age would be between 40 and 55.)

Boomers: Those born between 1946 and 1964 (so their age would be 56 to 74.)

Cisgender: Someone whose sense of personal identity and gender corresponds with their birth sex.

Pansexual: someone who is attracted sexually to a person of any sex or gender but not because of their gender but often because of their personality or soul.

Bisexual: someone attracted sexually to multiple genders.

Transgender: one whose sense of identity and gender does not correspond with their birth sex.

Transsexual: a person who emotionally and psychologically feels that they belong to the opposite sex. And may have undergone treatments to acquire the physical characteristics of the opposite sex.

Non-binary: someone who is neither exclusively male or female or is in-between or beyond both genders.

Sapiosexual: a person sexually attracted to someone (male or female) because of their ‘intelligence’.

Demi-sexual: someone who is sexually attracted to someone based on a strong ‘emotional’ connection.

Polyamorous: Someone who practices, or desires intimate relationships with more than one partner, with the informed consent of all partners involved.

DTF: Down to F**K. Simply means ready, or interested in penetrative sex.

Chapter 1 – An Unexpected Dive into the LA Social Condition.

Well, if you read the Introduction of this book you know my path to Uber. Now it’s time I told you how and why Juicy Uber came into being.

The Gig Economy as defined by and for the press and Wall Street was at the time primarily a ride-sharing community supported by part-time gig workers (drivers) covering in my case the Los Angeles and Orange County communities where I crossed paths with every imaginable rider type and attitude like the following:

A: Rider Types

A crucible of…

creatives & techies,

actors & actresses,

models & musicians,

writers & poets,

healthcare & day laborers,

fast food & service workers,

film & TV directors & producers,

students & teachers,

insurance agents & stockbrokers,

real estate & bank executives,

ad people & journalists,

moms & dads,

foreign & domestic visitors,

honeymooners & divorcees,

couples & groups,

cross-dressers & fashion designers,

doctors & nurses,

wait people & chefs,

engineers & artists,

politicians & lawyers,

shrinks & psychos,

browns & blacks,

yellows & whites,

Millennials & Gen Zers, Xers & Boomers,

tequila & vodka aficionados,

beer & wine lovers,

foodies and bulimics,

weed & cigar lovers,

gays & straights,

and every combination of the above.

B: Rider Attitudes

Category types ultimately mean nothing, but who they are and how they act makes the real difference in the life of an Uber driver.

Here are a few:

The friendly vs the unfriendly,

the articulate vs the reticent,

the beautiful vs the ugly,

the thin vs the obese,

the respectful vs the disrespectful,

the physically able vs the physically impaired,

the phonies vs the genuine,

the fun vs the serious,

the curious vs the blasé,

the entitled vs the appreciative,

the sexy vs the prudish,

the loud vs the quiet,

the boring vs the stimulating,

the smart vs the not so smart,

the cocky vs the modest and,

of course, every permutation and combination of columns A and B.

What

What a large majority of these rider types had in common was their curiosity about the Uber driving experience. The first questions Uber riders invariably asked me almost as soon as they entered my car:

How long have you been driving Uber?

Do you like driving for Uber?

Got any ‘juicy’ stories? And, of course, I did but I would only share one or two of the most outrageous that were appropriate to the specific rider or riders. Then, after hearing a story or two, I would get this advice: You should write a book And I would say: Really?

The Holidays that year were becoming a fun, entertaining, and yes, one might even say, an educational experience. One evening that December I was reviewing my Daily Uber Journal for tax information when I had one of those eureka moments.

I noted that I had been jotting down after each ride, not only the income earned, the time and length of the ride, and rider names but also interesting observations and side comments about the rider or riders. I was even making unsubstantiated (at the time) assumptions about them.

Some interesting and some memorable things had already happened. A lot of crazy things too! And then, duh, the light shone brightly. I finally realized that these observations and events were directly tied to the interesting, memorable, and crazy people who had caused them.

As more of the write a book suggestions came from the back seat as well as the encouragement from friends and family, I decided to continue keeping the journal entries I had already started, but now there was an end game in mind. I needed to include more than just interesting stories but also my amateur commentary about the Social Condition of the L.A. ride-sharing community. The stories I’m sharing are not gut-busting funny, but it was undeniable that the people I was driving were certainly busting acceptable standards of social morals and values of society to a new level, and in many cases, some might say a new low.

In the following chapters you’re going to hear about more of the good, the bad and the most outrageous of my driving experiences and riders. At some point you will no doubt ask: ‘how can he make such definitive, if not outlandish observations, and draw the critical as well as complimentary conclusions that he does?’

Ok, now’s the time for you to take a chug of your beer; a taste of your wine; or a sip of your 20-year-old McCallan as I push the pause button for an explanatory minute. Hopefully this will help you move from a suspicious non-believer to a true acolyte.

"If I have ever made any valuable discoveries, it has been

owing more to patient attention than any other talent."

Sir Isaac Newton.

I stopped driving people in early January 2018 when I moved to Las Vegas – to re-energize my life and write this book. During the 3-year period December 2014 to December 2017, I had over 6,000 Uber (and Lyft) rides transporting over 12,000 riders.

My rider ratings among those riders who rated me were in the 4.8 - 4.9 range out of 5 possible stars. Why are these numbers critical?

The ratings reflected that I had done a pretty good job in the eyes of the riders. More to the point, comments and observations about my riders were not for the most part born of revenge for bad ratings received from the riders. One might assume that had my 4.9 ratings been much lower it might have resulted in a bad attitude or performance level on my part. But it didn’t. If I gave a bad rider rating it was because the rider deserved it thanks to his or her