365 Daily Pep Talks

By Neil Coffman

365 Daily Pep Talks is a daily source of inspiration and motivation to face the things that come our way in life. Zig Ziglar once said "People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing, that's why we recommend it daily. This quote is really what this book is all about. Providing whoever may read it with a little piece of daily motivation. The sad reality is that we all need it. Because as the quote mentions; motivation doesn't last. How many times have you gone to conference, started a diet, or jumped in to something all gung hoe, this time it’s going to be different? I am betting more than once or twice. The new wears off; the results don’t happen as fast as we would like and before you know it we are right back in the same spot we were when we started. The motivation that we had when we first started just isn't there anymore for whatever reason. This book will help provide that daily motivation. A daily pep talk to help keep you focused on your goals and stay motivated.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Nov 25, 2014
• ISBN: 9781312703308

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www.365DailyPepTalks.com

Neil Coffman

www.neilcoffman.com

About the Author

They say that behind every good man is a great woman.  Well, I have three.  I am married to Jenn, the most amazing woman I could ever ask for.  She inspires me everyday to be the best person that I can be.  I have two perfect little girls, Mallory and Maddy.  They are both so beautiful and smart, I am not sure that they are mine. (I’m kidding)  I am a freshmen basketball coach at my alma mater and by far the luckiest guy in the world; every day I wake up is truly a dream come true.  I love my family, I love coaching and most importantly I love and serve Jesus Christ.  

I want to be up front about this book.  I am not in any way shape or form an author.  I am sure you will find many punctuation, spelling, and grammatical mistakes along the way.  So I just want to apologize for that upfront. 

In writing these daily pep talks, I found there were so many things that I myself need to improve on.  I hope you find this book as useful to you as it was for me to write over the course of the year.

Day 1 – January 1st

Happy New Year!   On this day every year millions and possibly billions of people make New Year’s Resolutions.  A New Year's resolution is a promise that you make to yourself to start doing something good or stop doing something bad on the first day of the year.  If you are like most, you have probably already slipped up and vowed to start clean tomorrow, or maybe next week; when the leftovers are gone,  or the gym isn’t so crowded, or your last cigarette is gone, etc.  

A 2012 study by the University of Scranton, Journal of Clinical Psychology states that only 8% of people who make resolutions are successful in achieving what they set out to accomplish.  So what’s the problem, why such an alarming fail rate?   I have two possible explanations, and I am sure there are many other explanations out there, but these two are what I think are the two biggest reasons why we never make it to the end.

Number 1, is why we are even setting the resolution to begin with.  More times than not, at least in my case, it is because the resolution is something that I ought to do instead of something that I want to do.  For example, if your resolution is to quit smoking and you are quitting because you know you should, maybe because of how society labels smokers, or because your spouse is nagging you to quit.   Then it typically won’t work.   This year try and make a resolution for you.  Make a resolution that is truly something that you want for yourself. 

Number 2, many resolutions tend to be to vague in nature.  For example, this year I am going to get in shape.  Well, what exactly does that mean?  Does that mean you are going to join a gym and go once a week, does it mean that you are going to be able to run a mile in under 6 minutes?  Make a resolution this year that you can track, that has tangible data so that you can track your progress.

So, how do we combat this?  I think several ways or things that you can do to help you achieve your resolution this year.  First, write it down and make it known.  There is nothing better than good ole fashioned accountability.   These days with social media this is easier than ever.  Post to all of your friends your New Year’s Resolution and ask for the help in keeping you accountable.  Second is break the resolution down, remember Rome wasn’t built in a day.  Break your resolution up into smaller goals.  I have a former coach who always used to say, the way to eat an elephant is the same as anything else, one bite at a time.  Meaning no matter how big the goal is, it is going to take steps to get there.  It doesn’t have to be giant leaps, take baby steps.  Set monthly or weekly goals to help you stay on track and achieve what it is you want to achieve.  Finally, if you fall off the wagon, shake it off and get right back on.   You are going to have moments or days of weakness, don’t let that discourage you or de-rail you from accomplishing your resolution.  Instead, learn from it and use it to motivate you to move closer to your end goal.

Team on 3!

Day 2 – January 2nd

Today, focus on doing the little things.   I had a coach when I was in high school who would always stress doing the little things correctly every time.  That was sort of his mantra.  Every day when we would come into the locker room there would be a phrase or saying written on the board for us as players to remember.  At any point throughout practice if you were called upon to state what was written on the board you had to know it or there was some sort of punishment involved for the rest of the team.  Obviously, as you can tell this had somewhat of an impact on me; so much in fact that I have incorporated this with the teams I coach today.  The first saying of every year written on the board was Do the little things correctly every time.  While this was the saying written on the board for the first day it would really become the theme for every season.    The thinking behind this in the realm of basketball is if you take care of the little things like playing hard, blocking out, catching the ball with 2 hands, triple threat position, the list goes on and on.  The big things (wins) will take care of themselves.

I think this holds true in life as well as basketball.  Over the next 363 days I will focus on a lot of little things in greater detail than I will today.  But for today, let’s just focus on doing the little things.  See a piece of trash and pick it up, say thank, hold the door open for someone, compliment someone, do something, anything that you typically would consider an insignificant gesture.   These are little things that you may tend to think go unnoticed.  But they add up.  Today, let’s start doing the little things and let the big things take care of themselves.

Team on 3!.

Day 3 – January 3rd

The way to get started is to stop talking and start doing. - Walt Disney

What is it today that you need to stop talking about doing and start doing it?   Is it a project around the house, maybe a business idea, or maybe a kind gesture towards someone that maybe you just haven’t gotten around to doing?  Sometimes life gets in the way and gives us lots of reasons why we can’t get things done that we want done.   Really though aren’t those just excuses?  Excuses as to why we aren’t where we want to be today.  

Think of something that you have wanted to get around to doing but haven’t gotten around to.  Write that something down and then next to it write down the reasons, obstacles, (excuses) why you haven’t been able to do it.  I don’t know what your reasons are, but today is the day when you are going to start doing whatever it is that you want to do.  Now take out a separate sheet of paper on that paper, write down the first obstacle (excuse).  Under that, write down how you can overcome it, and then put a date on it.  For example if the first excuse you have written down is money, and you need to come up with $2500 in order to accomplish something that you have always wanted to do.  At the top of the page write Money - $2500.  Under that I want you to write ways in which you can raise that money, if it is cutting back in some areas, selling something, picking up a side job, etc.  Then write the date in which you want to have this money raised.  Now do this for every hurdle (excuse) that you have written down.

Today, no more excuses stop talking (or thinking) about something you need to do and start doing it.  Get on your way to doing what it is you want to do, no matter what it is.  Professionally, personally, it doesn’t matter.  As Walt once said, The way to get started is to stop talking and start doing.

Team on 3!

Day 4 – January 4th

Make a lasting impression on someone today.  We are all going to be remembered for something.  What do you want that something to be?   Do you want people to remember how you always went the extra mile to make someone feel accepted, or how you always made those around you feel special?  Or perhaps you will be remembered as the person who only cared about themselves, or maybe the person who made sure that their needs were met before meeting the needs of others.    No matter which one of those you are today, take a step towards being remembered as you want to be remembered.  It can start with something small, a gift, a gesture, anything. 

You never know what a small gesture might do for someone, or the effect that it may have on them.  I am reminded of a story that I was once told about a young boy who was walking along the beach, picking up starfish and throwing them back into the ocean.  A man was walking along that same stretch of beach. As he got closer to the boy he noticed that the boy kept bending down, picking something up and throwing it into the water. As the man approached even closer, he was able to see that the boy was picking up starfish that had been washed up on the beach and, one at a time he was throwing them back into the water.

The man asked the boy what he was doing, the boy replied, I am throwing these washed up starfish back into the ocean, or else they will die through lack of oxygen.  But, said the man, You can't possibly save them all, there are thousands on this beach, you think it will really make a difference?  The boy looked down, and then bent down to pick up another starfish, smiling as he threw it back into the sea.  He replied, It made a difference to that one.

Make a lasting impression on someone today, you never know.  It just might make a difference.

Team on 3!

Day 5 – January 5th

Pay Attention.  Yes, that’s it.  That is goal for today to pay attention.  Yesterday I was checking out at the local home improvement store.  You know how that is, you are trying to get your things together, make sure you have all of your bags, putting the change back in your wallet, and doing your best not to lose a child while they are over staring at the candy for sale next to the register.  When the lady who was working the register says to me as I am walking out, Thanks for shopping with us today.  And my reply to her as I was focused on making sure I have all of my items, kids, etc. was You too!  As I made my way through the parking lot, I realized what had happened and I thought to myself, did I really just say you too when the cashier told me thanks for shopping with us?  Unfortunately that is exactly what had happened.  I know this isn’t a really big deal.  But I missed an opportunity, I missed an opportunity, instead of dismissing someone who had clearly helped me by ringing up my items and getting me through the line in a timely manner, I could have taken the time to say thank you, maybe even throw in  a have a great night.  But instead because I wasn’t paying attention, and focusing more on myself and getting my stuff together I just dismissed her with a you too. 

Today focus on paying attention, really listen to someone when you ask them how their doing.  For me this is something I need to work on.  So many times I say hey, how ya doing in passing, and often don’t even stop to get the answer.   Would it disrupt my day much if I stopped and paid attention to those around me?  Maybe for you it is when your wife starts telling you how her day was, and you start thinking to yourself I wonder when she is going to be done talking so I can turn on the game.   Pay attention to what she is telling you, offer some insight, and invest.  Who knows maybe something that small might just make her or the cashier at the home improvement store feel like they matter.

Team on 3!

Day 6 – January 6th

Finish what you start.  One of the biggest frustrations I have as a coach is getting kids to finish.  They do all of the right things, they get to the right spot, set their man up, make the perfect move, then get to the rim, and miss the lay-up.   Makes me want to pull what little hair I have left on my head out.  I find that I have the same frustration with other areas in my life.  It doesn’t matter if it is co-workers, friends, or relatives.  They get started on something do all of the planning, prep-work, make other necessary arrangements, only to not follow through at the very end.   This is one area where I think I am borderline OCD.  I can’t stand for things to be partially done.  When I start something I want it finished, in fact sometimes that is my demise.  I often lack the patience to do things they proper way.  (That is a topic for another day).

Here are a few ways that I find helps me make sure that when I start something, I finish it.  It doesn’t matter what it is, something as small as making a presentation for your boss that he needs done by next Friday, or painting your living room.  These small tips are things that I have found make it so much easier to finish what I start.  First, get everything you need before you get started.  If your project requires multiple trips to the store and you get started before you get the necessary items to finish, then chances are you will get started and get as far along as you can, stop and then get the items the next time you are out.  (This in typical male language means sometime within the next 6 weeks).  Second make sure you budget more than the time necessary to finish whatever it is you are working on.  If have to be somewhere 2 hours from the time you decide to get started on a 2 hour project, personal experience says that you will rush what you are doing and that instead of doing it the right way, you will try and cut corners to save time, and will probably have to end up doing it again later. (That is again a topic for another day).  Finally, don’t be afraid to ask for help.  I find that asking for someone to help me complete a project, not only cuts the amount of time needed to complete the project down, but often helps things go much smoother that could have been a difficult task flying solo. 

Remember there is satisfaction in finishing the job. So finish what you start.

Team on 3!

Day 7 – January 7th

Be who you are and be that well - Saint Francis De Sales

This quote is one that I would find myself coming back to time and again as I was growing up.  Often times I would compare myself to others or look at the things that other people have and find myself wanting to be more like them.  I hate to spoil the party, but more times than not, trying to be like someone else doesn’t end well.  Now let me clarify, I am not saying that it’s bad to have role models or to look up to other people, but that isn’t what we are talking about here. 

Many times as I was growing up I would find myself trying to change who I was to fit in with a certain crown, or impress a member of the opposite sex.  Instead of just being myself and letting who I was as a person speak for itself.  Chances are if you have to change who you are to be with someone or to fit in with a certain crown, then that really isn’t a group or person that you want to be a part of anyway.  Now if you don’t like who you are or who you have become, then maybe some changes need to be made in your life, that is another topic for another day.  But I sincerely believe that God doesn’t make mistakes, God created you to be you. 

We all have strengths and we all have weaknesses.  A huge part of being successful is learning how to use your strengths and then learning how to master, or compensate for your weaknesses.  One of the major keys to being happy in life is accepting who you are.  Yes, we should all try to be better people, make an impact, and that sort of thing.  Clearly you agree, or this book wouldn’t have appealed to you, and you wouldn’t still be reading it.  But striving to be a better person isn’t changing the core of who you are.  It is striving to be the best you, that you can be. 

Team on 3!

Day 8 – January 8th

Yesterday we talked about being satisfied with who you are.  Today I would like to kind of piggy back that topic a little bit with being happy with what you have.  I mean let’s face it; none of it is really ours to begin with.  We only have what we have, because that is what God has blessed us with. 

1 Timothy 6:6-9 states but godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into the world and we can take nothing out of it.  But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.  Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. 

Often times we lose sight of what is really important in life and get focused on the things that we don’t have, instead of focusing on the blessings that we do have.  I know there have been a lot of times in my life where I have been guilty of trying to keep up with the Joneses.  Instead of looking around at the family that I have been blessed with, the job that I have, getting to coach basketball high school basketball in the state of Indiana.  Yet sometimes I find myself wishing I had more. 

Take some time today to just stop and pause, count all of the many blessings that you have in your life, write them down if you have to.  When I stop and take time to look at all God has blessed me with, I feel silly even thinking about wanting more than what I have.  Be content.  

Team on 3!

Day 9 – January 9th

A wise man will make more opportunity than he finds. - Sir Francis Bacon

I came across this quote today in my reading and immediately fell in love with it.  So many times you hear the phrase, opportunity knocks, or opportunity is knocking at your door.  I am a firm believer that opportunity is not something that will find you if you are just sitting around waiting for it to knock.  Opportunity is something that is created, something that is achieved or worked for.  You have to make opportunity happen. 

I am sure there are hundreds of examples where just being in the right place at the right time has created an amazing opportunity for someone.  But I would venture to say that the majority of opportunities that present themselves to us come through a result of hard work and dedication. 

As a coach I often hear the excuse that I would have been a much better player if my coach last year would have given me an opportunity.  I cringe every time I hear that excuse, and here’s why.  That young man had the same opportunity as everyone else, but others made the most of their opportunities.  In the school that I am lucky enough to coach, we don’t have kids who are getting playing time based on God given ability.  The group kids that we have make their way into the line-up based on the amount of time and hard work that they put into getting better.  These are the kids who have a willingness to push themselves past the point of comfort.  These are the kids who are getting the playing time; these are the ones who are given the opportunity.  It is these kids who had opportunity knock at their door.  Not the kids who show up for practice when it is time for practice to start and leave the gym when practice is over.  Not the kids who coast through the end of the drill because it’s getting physically too tough. 

Today think about an opportunity that you would like to knock at your door.  Maybe it’s a career opportunity, or an opportunity to finish school, whatever the opportunity is that you would like to see knock on your door.  Then think about ways that you can work to make this opportunity become more of a reality.  What extra effort can you put in towards this opportunity presenting itself to you.

Team on 3!

Day 10 – January 10th

There are no mistakes in life, just lessons. – Unknown

I have tried to look up the origin of this quote and have found many different sources, so I am not sure who to give the credit to.  But regardless it is still a great quote, and something worth sharing. 

I am sure we all have things that we’ve done in life that we regret, or situations that we wish we would have handled differently.  The takeaway however is not to say that we don’t have mistakes, but instead to make sure that we are learning from those mistakes.  To make sure that we are growing as individuals and not making the same mistakes over and over again. 

I think it is also important that you share your mistakes with those around you.  Share what you have learned through your mistakes and help others to not make the same mistakes that you have.  Take ownership when you mess up, and once you have done that you can then begin to look back and see how you can learn from what happened and move on.  When you look back to examine, it is important that you aren’t dwelling on the past, but instead using it to learn from your mistakes.  Remember you can tell a lot about a person from how they deal with situations when things aren’t going their way.  So how you respond to a mistake will speak volumes about who you are as a person.  So take a deep breath, take ownership, and learn from your mistakes.

Team on 3!

Day 11 – January 11th

Worry is a down payment on a problem that you may never have – Joyce Meyer.  

I often have to remind myself of this quote as sometimes I get caught up thinking (worrying) about things that the future might hold.  

Matthew 6:27 says: Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life.  I love this passage, because it really enforces that no matter how much you worry, or don’t worry about a potential problem, that it will not change the outcome.  Later on in Matthew 6, verse 34 it says: Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of it’s own. 

When we worry about things to come, really all we are doing is robbing ourselves of today.  It is my belief that we should do our very best to live in the moment, seize the day, stop and smell the roses, you know all of those cliché but very true quotes.  If we are constantly worrying about the future or worrying about the things to come then we are robbing our self of the moment, robbing our self of today.

I haven’t done many death bed interviews in my life, in fact, I haven’t done any.   But I would say it is a pretty safe bet that no one on their death bed has thought to themselves, you know, I wish I would have spent a little more time worrying about things.  Instead, I am certain it is just the opposite.  I am sure they wish they would have stopped to smell the roses a little more, maybe take some time to enjoy each day a little more.  

I know everyone has some things that they worry about.  For me it is my children, I worry so much about how they will grow up, or what if something happens to them, or what if something happens to me.  When instead of worrying about these things I should be relishing the time that I get to spend with them every day.  I have put 3 lines below; write down a couple things that you spend time worrying about.  It doesn’t have to be 3, or it can be more than 3.

___________________________

___________________________

___________________________

Now think about those things.  I want you to consider praying about those things that you wrote above.  Give them to God.  1 Peter 5:7 says: Cast all of your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 

Give it to God and know that He cares for you.  Know that God has a plan for your life, take rest in knowing that God is in control

Team on 3!

Day 12 – January 12th

Earlier I wrote about doing the little things.  It is the little things that add up to really make a difference.  Today one of the little things that we can do is to make someone smile.  It doesn’t matter how big or how small the gesture; just as long as you get a smile from someone. 

It could be something as simple as telling a co-worker a corny joke that you heard on the radio this morning.  Or something like telling your wife or significant other that they look nice today.  Or if you are feeling really crazy then do something big like leaving a waiter or waitress a really big tip, or picking your kid(s) up early from school just to hang out with them.

According to a TIME Magazine article from 2009, the best way to lift your mood is to smile.  Now I am not sure how scientific any of that really is, but I do know this.  It is really hard to smile when you are in a bad mood.  Life is full of hard stuff, bad news, and things that can get us down.  Today be a source of something positive for someone.  So go out and do someone a favor today, make them smile. 

Team on 3!

Day 13 – January 13th

Work Hard.  Hamilton Holt once said, Nothing worthwhile comes easily.  Work, continuous work, and hard work, is the only way to accomplish results that last.

I love this quote, especially the first part.  Nothing worthwhile comes easily.  That goes hand in hand with one of my other favorite quotes, If it were easy, everyone would do it.  I completely agree with that.  And to add on to that if it were easy, and everyone was doing it, then it wouldn’t be that special to begin with.  If it weren’t hard, if achieving your goals was easy, then it wouldn’t mean as much.  Most of the glory in being successful and achieving what you set out to achieve isn’t in the finished product, it is in the satisfaction of knowing how hard you worked to make it all happen.

Thomas Eddison said There is no substitute for hard work.  Whatever it is you are doing or trying to do, do it with all that you have.  Work hard at it.  The reward for your hard work will be much greater than the reward for just the will to succeed. 

I would venture to say that almost everyone has the will to succeed, or the will to win.  The difference in all of us is the will to work; the willingness to put in the extra hours.  There aren’t too many success stories out there of people saying Well I thought I would open a computer business, and the next thing I know I owned a multi-million dollar empire.  Instead there are stories of the many years, and all of the blood, sweat, and tears that went in to making it.

Like I said before, the will to succeed is in all of us, decide today to be different, decide today that you are going to be the small few who put in the extra hours, the ones who sacrifice the blood, sweat, and tears to make it happen. 

They say that knowing is half the battle.  Well, now you know that nothing worthwhile comes easily.  Struggles will come, but work, continuous work, and hard work are the only ways to accomplish results that last.  So get to work.

Team on 3!

Day 14 – January 14th

Happiness doesn’t depend on any external conditions; it is governed by your mental attitude. – Dale Carnegie

What a great quote.  There is so much truth in how having a positive mental attitude can alter how you feel.   People are attracted to positivity.  Positive people tend to light up a room when they walk in.

Positivity is infectious.  As a coach I tend to lean on the players who exude positivity.  They are the rudder that steers the ship when waves start crashing.  They are the ones that the other guys on the team are looking to when things aren’t going well.  The positive guys are natural leaders, not because of their assertiveness, or willingness to take on a leadership role, but because of the desire of others to follow.  The other guys gravitate towards their positivity.  After all, what good is a leader if no one is willing to follow? 

Proverbs 17:22 says: A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.  Everyone can use a little good medicine.  There are plenty of things out there to get us down.  How you deal with those things really determines how long we are in the valley.  Romans 5:3-5 says: More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.  Know that God is using you every moment, every situation; He is refining you, building you, and more importantly using you.  What is greater than knowing that God loves us no matter what?  Find joy in that always.

Be positive; find the silver lining in the dark cloud.  If not for yourself, do it for others.  Be a positive influence today, cheer someone on.  Every one could use a little more positivity in their lives, be that source of positivity for someone today.

Team on 3!

Day 15 – January 15th

To think is easy.  To act is hard.  But the hardest thing to do in the world is to act in accordance to our thinking. - Johann Von Goethe

I can begin to describe how many times this has been the case with me.  Where I know what the right thing to do is, or I know what I should or shouldn't do in certain situations but I don't follow through.  Maybe it's because of fear of what others will think, or a lack of confidence in myself, who knows why I don't always do the things I think I should or shouldn't do, but bottom line is I have got to get better. 

Just the other night I was walking out of a store and a young woman approached us.  She was dressed nice, didn't look like she was in need or anything like that, and she says can you please help me?  My 3 year old son is in the car and I have to get him to his dad about 60 miles away and I don't have money to get there.  His dad is going to give me gas money to get home when I get there, but I need money to get to him.  My instant reaction was I am sorry, I don't carry cash.  Which is true, I never carry cash; I am strictly a debit card kind of guy.  As I am driving home, I kept re-playing that in my mind, and I thought to myself, you should have offered to follow her to a gas station and put gas in her car.  And then I would try and reason with myself, well if I go back now, and offer to follower her to a gas station I will be about 20 minutes late getting where I am going.  So I didn't. 

I try not to live with regret, I try to learn from my mistakes, and I do believe not going back and offering to take her to get some gas with my debit card was a mistake.  I have learned from it.  I've learned that it's hard to act in accordance with our thinking, and I need to get better at it.

Today, act in accordance with your thinking.  If you think about doing something nice for someone, do it.  If you think about complimenting your spouse, Do it.  Don't hold it in.  You never know the difference you will make.

Team on 3!

Day 16 – January 16th

Competitors take bad breaks and use them to drive themselves.  Quitters take bad breaks and use them as reasons to give up. – Nancy Lopez

Which one are you?  Are you a competitor or a quitter?  I am guilty of both.  For the most part I am very driven by failure.  When I know that I can do something or I want to do something, I let nothing stand in my way, not even failure.  I get back up and try again; I learn from my mistakes/failures and give it another go.  In fact I often develop tunnel vision, I become so focused on getting the results I want that I don’t rest until it’s complete.  There have been times in my life however where I have let failure get to me.  I get down on myself or get discouraged when the outcome isn’t quite what I was looking for, and I just gave up.  I would venture to say that in those cases, whatever it was that I was after, I simply didn’t want it bad enough.

Make sure that failure isn’t your end result.  Make sure that failure is not your destination.   Maybe there has been something that you have been trying to do or get done for a long time now, but always seem to come up short.  Take that and use it to get you to where you want to be.  Each time you fail don’t think of it as yet another failure, think of it as being one step closer to figuring it all out.  You are one step closer to