It Starts at Home
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A guide for parents of children with disabilities from the perspective of a woman with a disability.
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It Starts at Home - Mirella L. Sacco
IT STARTS AT HOME
A GUIDE FOR PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH DISABILITIES
Mirella L. Sacco
Copyright © 2017 by Mirella L. Sacco
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner other than for the purpose of brief quotations in a book review.
To request permission or submit corrections please email mlsacco@shaw.ca Published in Canada
Neither the author, the publisher nor their agents are responsible for any injury resulting from the use of this book or its contents.
ISBN: 978-0-9939473-1-5
To those who have helped in the development of this book, thank you.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
TAKING YOUR BUNDLE OF JOY HOME
CHOOSING CHILDCARE
GIVE YOUR CHILD THE GIFT OF SELF-ESTEEM AND CONFIDENCE
PRESCHOOL
PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN FROM ONLINE PREDATORS
TIME FOR SCHOOL
SIBLINGS
RELATIONSHIP BUILDING
TEENS
TRANSITIONING INTO ADULTHOOD
ADVOCACY
ACCESSIBILITY AND INCLUSION
MEDICAL
EMBARRASSING YOUR CHILD
SEX AND PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES
ABOUT MIRELLA
INTRODUCTION
My intention in writing It Starts at Home is to bring you as a parent of a disabled child to a better understanding from the perspective of an adult with a disability. I want you to know that having a child with a disability is not the end of the world, although you may feel that way sometimes. Although I have Spina Bifida this book can apply to children who have a wide range of disabilities. At times it may seem I am referring to one specific parent however that is not my intention as both parents should be involved in the raising of their children.
I am not a doctor nor a trained professional, and I am not able to give you statistical information from a clinical point of view. What I can do is provide you with a practical guide to raising a child with a disability based on what I have observed and gone through as a person with a disability myself. My hope is that this book will empower you to make the very best out of a situation that may be seen as negative according to societal standards. As an individual with a disability, I have observed the negativity that can occur when a child with a disability is born into a family, especially a family that is ill equipped to deal with the situation properly.
Raising a child with a disability can be a challenge but it can also be very rewarding. At times it will try your patience and be exhausting but it will ultimately give you a sense of how precious life is. It may take you out of your element and your comfort zone, change how you think, feel and even react. The first thing you need to do is throw all of those preconceived notions that you have out the window because they are not real; start with a new slate. I want you to understand that everything happens for a reason and that your child has a purpose in life; that you as a parent have an obligation to do everything in your power to assist and inspire your child to realize that purpose.
You may perceive things happen for a reason
to mean that you have done something wrong or that you are being punished for something horrible you have done. Know that you did not do anything wrong. If you feel that you are being punished this feeling will inevitably lead you to feel resentment, jealousy and eventually hate towards your child. Your child needs you to be emotionally healthy and if you have feelings that remotely resemble what I have described then seek professional help; your entire family unit will benefit from you being emotionally healthy.
Like it or not, we are living in a world where what our children hear, see, feel, and learn will affect how they grow up and who they turn out to be. How children are raised can impact their futures. At the heart of this book is my own experience as a woman with a