On My Knees

By Katie Carriere

First-time author Katie Carriere recounts her spiritual journey following a devastating divorce. Her story takes you through the myriad of emotions associated with heartache, depression, and a search for significance as she discovers that even in the deepest, darkest pit of despair, she is never alone. This is a story of surrender and redemption that is sure to leave readers longing for their own personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Apr 4, 2014
• ISBN: 9781490832319

Katie Carriere

Katie Carriere is a high school English teacher and single mother of three. She is an active member of The Bayou Church in Lafayette, Louisiana.

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Copyright © 2014 Katie Carriere.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used

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written permission of the publisher except in the case of

brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture quotations taken from the Holy Bible,

New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004. Used

by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.,

Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

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ISBN: 978-1-4908-3230-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-3231-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014905796

WestBow Press rev. date: 4/3/2014

Contents

The Pew

Born Again

A New Understanding

The Best Parenting Decision Ever

Celebrate Recovery

More than Just a Friend

Torn and Confused

Crash and Burn

New Life

Trust

The Temple of the Holy Spirit

The Conrads

Living

Afterword

Acknowledgements

I love the Lord because he hears my

voice and my prayer for mercy.

Because he bends down to listen, I

will pray as long as I have breath!

Death wrapped its ropes around me;

the terrors of the grave overtook me.

I saw only trouble and sorrow.

Then I called on the name of the

Lord: Please, Lord save me!

(Psalms 116: 1-4)

The Pew

It was like a fog…deep and heavy and suffocating. That was how I felt the morning that I found myself in the pew, alone. Or at least I felt alone. It was not a Sunday or any other regular day or time of worship. It was the Monday morning after my heart broke.

Things had not been right for the last year or so, but I always knew we would work it out somehow. I believed with all my heart that we were one of those couples who could withstand anything. I blamed myself for taking that for granted. But this is not a story about guilt, self-pity, or condemnation. This is a story of surrender and redemption. It is a song of praise and awestruck wonder at the miraculous works of my Savior.

I don’t really remember driving there or even walking through the church doors. What I do remember was the sound of my heart beating as I heard the words I’m done. They were not shouted or angry. That’s what hurt the most. They were emotionless. Our marriage of 13 years was over and I never saw it coming. Like I said, there were problems but I never imagined that he would just give up.

After a brief, tired argument over a petty issue I spoke the words I came to regret. We can’t keep doing this, I said. I can’t live like this anymore. In my heart these were not words of surrender, but a desperate plea for change. I guess