Oops!: How Not to Swallow Your Words

By Biodun Samuel Adepetu

Spoken words are like broken eggs, which when broken, are difficult to re-assemble.

Have you ever been in a situation where you said something you wished you never said?

Dear reader, Ive got good news for you!

The book Oops! is a one-stop shop and source of learning on how to use the tongue positively.

By following the advice in this book, you wont have any cause to regret your words to others.

The words of your mouth shall be filled with honey and melody; they shall be sweet music in the ears of your listeners!

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Oct 25, 2013
• ISBN: 9781449797850

Biodun Samuel Adepetu

Biodun Samuel Adepetu lives in Lagos, Nigeria with his wife, his multi-cultural neighbours and their innocent, but exciting children, in a simple African neighbourhood with everyday sounds, sights, and smell. He writes based on personal experience and observation of happenings around him. He loves reading, writing, music, travelling, and photography.

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Copyright © 2013 Biodun Samuel Adepetu.

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Unless otherwise stated, all spiritual quotations are from the Authorized King James Version of the Bible.

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ISBN: 978-1-4497-9785-0 (e)

WestBow Press rev. date: 10/24/2013

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Acknowledgement

Preface

1   Introduction

2   The Tongue

3   Negative Use of the Tongue

4   Against Whom Could One Negatively Use One’s Tongue

5   How to Use the Tongue Positively

6   How to React to Negative Words from Others

7   Correcting Wrong-Doers With Love

8   Get Involved: Fellowship and Network

Word References

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

My sincere thanks go to the members of the Body of Christ at the Chosen Generation Parish of the Redeemed Christian Church of God, as well as my colleagues at Hotel Support Services Limited, Skyway Aviation Handling Company Limited, and at SIFAX Nigeria Limited, Lagos, Nigeria.

I’m particularly grateful to preachers of the gospel for their messages from the pulpit as well as through the print and electronic media.

I’m grateful to the entire members of the Balogun-Adepetu family. Specifically, I am very grateful to my two brothers, Prof. J.A Adepetu and Mr. J.A Adepetu, who made sure I had a sound education.

To my nephews, nieces, and cousins, I say you’ve been more like brothers and sisters to me. Thank you for sharing with me your views and aspirations without any restraint. Thanks for your love. I love you all.

After man was created, the Almighty God, in His infinite wisdom created a woman to be a suitable assistant to him. He said it is not good for the man to be alone. I have not been alone on this project; I’ve had the support of my friend and wife, to whom I’m grateful for her suggestions.

I’m grateful to my colleagues who took out time to go through the manuscript and made useful suggestions.

Thanks to the entire members of the publishers, West Bow Press (a Division of Thomas Nelson Inc.) for putting this book together in its present format.

Above all, my appreciation goes to the almighty God, my greatest source of inspiration, for giving me a sound mind, and the grace to start and complete this project.

"Stay away from people who belittle your ambitions, small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you too can become great" – Mark Twain

PREFACE

WATCH YOUR TONGUE

Ps.141:3

You might be wondering, why this bold, commanding, and unconventional statement?

It is simply to bring home to your sub-conscious the gravity of the need to always keep a watch over the things we say!

Daily you need to fight the battle against the temptation to say what you should not say as well as overcoming the fear of not saying what you should say when you’re required to say it. This is aptly captured by the Apostle Paul when he said:

….I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. … For I do not that good which I will; but the evil which I hate, that I do. ….

In the spiritual realm, you don’t want to say anything evil against the Trinity (God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit).

Of course, you also have to be sensitive about what you say at all times so that the wicked ones don’t hold your words against you on judgment day.

In the physical, you know you have to watch what you say to members of your family, your neighbours, your country and its leaders, and finally, what you say about yourself.

In the Western part of Nigeria is the name, Orolugbagbe, which could be translated to mean:

•   Words you speak to others are not forgotten.

•   Issues and feelings that arise from spoken words are not forgotten, even if by chance those spoken words are forgotten.

Always remember that your tongue carries a power; the power to make, the power to break; the power to give life, the power to destroy. Use it wisely.

You are welcome to learn more as you read along. This is one book you’d be glad you bought.

"…the deepest wounds in life do not come from swords

But from spoken words…"

CHAPTER 1

Introduction

There once lived among men, a man who was always mindful of what he said about himself and about others. He was equally mindful of what he said to others. Most of the time he spoke in parables. Simply because he knew that each and every one of us will give an account of every word we speak about ourselves, about others, or to others.

He was a perfect example of the person of love. He was love in living flesh. He was always speaking words of love in a fair, firm, and friendly manner to make sure mankind is prevented from everlasting self-destruction.

That man is the Lord Jesus Christ.

When He was on earth, He was fair in His dealings with others as can be seen in the case of the woman caught in adultery (1).

He was firm as can be seen when He cleansed the temple of evil-doers (2).

He was friendly as can be seen when He raised Lazarus back to life. Also, when He chastised His disciples who tried to prevent children from getting close to Him (3).

In Nigeria and Africa at large, spoken words are likened to broken eggs, which when broken, are difficult to re-assemble. That is, it is difficult to take back spoken words; thus the sub-title – How Not to Swallow Your Words.

As you go through this book, you will discover how and why you would not:

Hurt the feelings of others by what you say while making yourself feel good.

Say things that make you unacceptable to others. In other words, the things you say must attract others to you.

Say things with a motive of being mischievous. In other words, stop deriving pleasure from being mischievous with what you say.

Play politics with what you say. In other words, whatever you say must always be said the way it is. Call a spade a spade. Sow seeds of love through what you say, either when commending or correcting others (4).

Perhaps, talking is one of the most difficult human virtues to control. On a daily basis, we struggle with what to say and what not to say so as not to hurt one another.

The urge to talk is always present because it is the most common means of communicating with one another. Consequently, drawing a line between what to say and what not to say is a constant daily challenge with which we contend.

Dear reader, I’ve got good news for you! You are a privileged person because you have chosen to buy and read this book; and I can guarantee you that by the time you might have gone through it, you would like to