It Is All About You!: Strategies to Re-Pattern Your Perspective for Success

By Reneé Perry

BREAK ALL THE RULES!

Rene Perry displays the unique ability to supply the tools needed to help unlock your talents, organize your thoughts, and guide your actions through the process of getting comfortable jumping over business hurdles. She facilitates recognition of your personal strengths and weaknesses, and how each affects your business decisions. I have a deep respect for Renes business skills and judgment.
~ Sue Gott, president of TallGrass Signs

CREATE THE LIFE OF YOUR DREAMS
SIMPLY AND NATURALLY

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
~ Albert Einstein

What disconnects you from success is not a lack of talent but the perspective that you hold that has created your life so far. Whether you are starting a business or starting a family, once you know how to re-pattern your perspective, you will change the trajectory of your life and business, thus doing less while achieving more joy and fulfillment. It IS All about You! coaches you to your success so you can create the life you have always dreamed of with peace of mind.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: Feb 21, 2013
• ISBN: 9781452568829

Reneé Perry

Reneé Perry is an ACC certified business coach, certified passion test facilitator, owner of three businesses, investor, speaker, and author. Reneé provides presentations, workshops, and private coaching in the areas of small business success and personal development. She currently lives in New Lenox, Illinois, with her husband of almost thirty years and two of her three children.

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Copyright © 2013 Reneé Perry

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The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

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ISBN: 978-1-4525-6881-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4525-6883-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4525-6882-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013902839

Balboa Press rev. date: 2/18/2013

Table of Contents

Introduction

Part I: The Foundation of Your Success

Chapter 1: Re-Pattern Your Perspective

Chapter 2: You Create Your Life

Chapter 3: How Do You Create Your Life?

Chapter 4: The Power of Living a Purposeful Life

Chapter 5: What is Your Life Purpose?

Part II: Defining Your Success

Chapter 6: Follow Your Compass

Chapter 7: Reconnecting with Who You Are

Chapter 8: You Management – Prioritizing Your Priorities

Chapter 9: Mind over Money

Chapter 10: The Business of Entrepreneurship

Part III: Allow Success to Flow

Chapter 11: Accepting the Seemingly Unacceptable

Chapter 12: Resist Resistance

Chapter 13: Feelings – Your Internal Guidance System

Chapter 14: Life in the Balance

Chapter 15: Embrace Your Inner Introvert

Part IV: Continue the Success Journey

Chapter 16: Raising Adults

Chapter 17: Own Your Power

Afterword

Notes

Recommended Reading

About the Author

Acknowledgements

Here I sit, finished writing this book – or so I thought. I spent many hours putting my unorganized thoughts down on paper and then attempting to organize them. Several good friends helped me by reading portions and giving me feedback. The editing was completed beautifully by Gwen Hoffnagle.

Soon thereafter I sat down to watch Dr. Phil, one of my favorite television shows, and his guest was Dr. Karyl McBride, author of Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. Fascinated by their conversation, I ordered her book that evening, and I just finished it. I am really grateful to her for writing it and for my having read it.

I researched narcissism when I was younger, and had come to the conclusion that my mom was probably narcissistic; but since she was never actually diagnosed, I was concerned about throwing this label on her. Dr. McBride understands the narcissistic family and talks about it perfectly in her book. It’s as if she had a window into my home and soul as I was growing up, leaving me with no doubt that that was what was wrong with my mom. I especially appreciate the message of her book to not lay blame on your circumstances and the people in your life, but to move forward, which correlates with my message.

Will I Ever Be Good Enough? explains exactly why writing my book was important to me. I want to help others understand their value and perfection in this world, how to navigate their lives based on who they are, and that nothing else matters more. No matter what circumstances or challenges you are brought into this world with, by making changes to your perspective you can transform your life and see things differently.

My reason for writing It Is All about You! is not to relive my past or gain sympathy, but for my readers to understand that I came from a bleak place where my life evolved around trying to help my family, with no purpose beyond that. It left me exhausted. I didn’t lose my way, because I never had a way to follow that was all my own. I had absolutely no idea who I was or what I wanted – I was too inured to putting out fires and being who my parents wanted me to be. Somewhere down the road I began to acknowledge and respect my own value, thanks to the people who popped up in my life, good and bad, showing me the way.

After reading Dr. McBride’s book, I thought that maybe I needed to change It Is All about You! to reflect this new knowledge about my upbringing that leaves no doubt as to where I come from. But because I don’t want to make that the focus, I’ve decided that Acknowledgements is the perfect venue in which to do so.

I have been healing all of my life. Thanks to Will I Ever Be Good Enough? I now realize that even though I have completely transformed myself, I will be healing for the rest of my life. Writing this book has been part of my healing process. I remember watching Oprah Winfrey when she discussed that she never goes to therapy because the guests on her show are her therapy. Well, her show was also my therapy. She started her show a year before the birth of my first daughter. When I quit work to raise my daughter, I tried to catch every show.

I am very grateful to my husband, Jim, for giving me unconditional love from the very beginning of our life together. He truly has taught me unconditional love. He has given me the support and acknowledgement I craved when I met him, which has been the foundation of my healing process and has allowed me to be the real, authentic me. He has been the love of my life and I am looking forward to a few more decades with him. At the time of this writing we’ve had almost thirty years together.

I am grateful for my three children, Allison, Alyssa, and Alec, for just being themselves. They are beautiful souls whom I love more than life, and they have been a great gift to me.

I am grateful to my sister, Colette Schuler-Stocks, for being by my side through this journey called life. She has been my healing partner; we went to many different workshops together, reading the same books so we could exchange ideas and thoughts, and analyzing everything together ad nauseam. She was also my trusted confidant when I was first writing this book and needed feedback.

I am grateful for my other sister and two brothers, Julie, Ted, and Jay, who have also been such big parts of my life even when we don’t talk for long periods of time. When we do get together, it’s as if we haven’t been apart. In all selfishness I am glad I did not take my childhood journey alone.

A big thank you goes to Autumn Schultz who is a very talented artist and designer who designed the diagrams in this book. I am proud to consider Autumn a part of our family.

Another big thank you goes to a couple of friends and generous souls who were willing to give me feedback on this book, Beth Majerszky and Hayward Suggs. I am grateful for their willingness to help and support me.

A thank you is necessary for Lincoln-Way Toastmasters Club. If I hadn’t joined Toastmasters, this book would have never been written. This club allowed me to get over the fear of speaking and relaying my message to outsiders. It is also the reason I was able to organize my unorganized thoughts. Not to be biased, but I am sure we have the best club with the best people around.

I would like to thank the women from the Frankfort/Mokena Chapter of the Dynamic Professional Women’s Networking group who have now become wonderful friends. Unbeknownst to them, by being the trial audience for my preliminary presentations, they were my support system. I am grateful for their support and friendship.

Introduction

The unexamined life is not worth living.

~ Socrates

Have you ever read biographies of legends such as Wilma Rudolph, Martin Luther King Jr., Helen Keller, John F. Kennedy Jr., Michael Jordan, George Washington, Albert Einstein, or Ludwig van Beethoven, in which they became legends due to accomplishing incredible feats? Have you ever wondered, How did they do that? How did they achieve such monumental successes in their lives so that books are written about them and movies are made?

Biographies and listening to personal interviews are windows into someone’s soul, and are great ways to gain insight into who someone really is (or was) and how and why they did what they did in their lives. How is it that John F. Kennedy Jr. was given his last rites three times and yet still became the president of the United States? And how did Wilma Rudolph, who was a sickly baby and child, having contracted polio, a crippling disease, become the fastest runner in the world? I have hung on to every word Oprah Winfrey