Finding the Right Mate: Will You Marry Me?

By Gilbert Edwards

The author will try to explain and encourage those that are seeking to marry that marriage is a holy estate instituted by God. Marriage was ordained for the life-long companionship, help and comfort which husbands and wives ought to have for each other. The authors deepest focus points are: Life-long Marriage and Finding the Right Mate.

Many married couples do not keep the marriage vows they made. Because of that, I recommend marital counseling before marriage. The author does not focus too much on divorce because of his disbelief in divorce. It was Moses that executed the bill of divorce. He did it to protect the women because husbands would divorce their wives for anything just to marry another woman.

Women have a moral personality and are not a thing that men may hand over to another, and then take her back again at his pleasure.

The author believes there is not law instituting or commanding divorce. Most people use Matthew 19:9, where Jesus was only explaining what Moses meant. The marriage that God wants is a marriage of a life-long commitment; a forever happy home!

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Feb 4, 2011
• ISBN: 9781456724825

Gilbert Edwards

Episcopal Bishop, Dr. Gilbert H. Edwards, Sr. was born and reared in Maryland. He attended the Pomphrey Elementary School of Patapsco Park, Maryland and The Bates High School in Annapolis, Maryland. He spent his last year of high school in South Fallsburg, New York. Dr. Edwards is a lover of sports and served in the United States Military Armed Forces until 1962. Dr. Edwards married Dorothy Mae Littlejohn in 1964 and from this union 16 beautiful children were born. Dr. Edwards received his ministerial calling in 1968. Under the tenure of the late Honorable Bishop Hansome Lewis Walker of Baltimore MD, serving as Sunday School Superintendent and Assistant Pastor of the Faith Church of the Lord Jesus Christ, Baltimore, Maryland. He was later called to pastor the Full Gospel True Mission Church, along with his companion, Mother Edwards, where they have both labored now for 31 years. In August 1982, Bishop Edwards received his pastoral ordination credentials from the Pentecostal Churches of the Apostolic Church Association, Inc. (PCAF) Bishop Edwards serves on the Board of Bishops for the Pentecostal Churches of the Apostolic Faith Association, Inc. and as a District Officer, since 1990 for 8 churches in the Pennsylvania State and New Jersey State areas. He presently holds the position as Episcopal Bishop of the PCAF, Inc. as the State of Delaware Diocesan, Chairman and Sunday School Auxiliary Bishop for the Eastern and Southern States Council of the PCAF. Dr. Edwards obtained his Associate of Arts and Bachelor of Arts Degrees in Biblical Studies from the Arlington Bible College in Baltimore, Maryland. In 1993, he received his Master of Arts Degree and in May 1996, he achieved his Doctorate of Theology in Biblical and Theological Studies from the Antietam Bible Seminary in Hagerstown, Maryland. Dr. Edwards is a lover of people. His concern, compassion and longsuffering has won great admiration and trust for him among his immediate family, his church family and peers!

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© 2011 Gilbert Edwards. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 1/27/2011

ISBN: 978-1-4567-2484-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-2483-2 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-2482-5 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011901064

Printed in the United States of America

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any Web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Dedication

To all who are seeking to marry

and

Those with marital problems.

Forward

In offering this book to the public, the author believes that he is doing a great service to the readers. The volume of this book is devoted largely to those who are seeking to marry or are having marital problems.

Marriage is one of the greatest personal significance to every man and woman. No one can afford to live in a time like ours without acquainting oneself with the vital issues that have pleased God to open to our understanding in this fast moving age. Such issues are freighted with eternal consequences to every soul. There are too many marriages with the wrong mate.

The author has lived and wrote this book with tears. His interpretation of marriage and the doctrines of truth that he has established through intensive study of the Scriptures, however, have borne the test of time and of diligent scrutiny by Bible students. The author wishes that this book will bring relief and peace to the minds of the readers.

Contents

Introduction

CHAPTER I THE MARRIAGE

CHAPTER II THE WOMAN

CHAPTER III THE MAN

CHAPTER IV FINDING YOUR MATE

CHAPTER V WOMEN THAT CAN BE FOUND

CHAPTER VI MEN THAT WOMEN SHOULD REJECT

CHAPTER VII MEN THAT WOMEN CAN SAY YES TO

CHAPTER VIII SOLVING MARRIAGE PROBLEMS

CHAPTER IX THE CONVICTION OF A LIFE-LONG COMMITTMENT AND IT’S APPLICATION TO MARITAL COUNSELING

CHAPTER X THE UNITY BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE

CHAPTER XI THE LAWS OF MARRIAGE

CHAPTER XII MARRIAGES’ SPECIAL CONCERNS

Acknowledgements

Introduction

The author will try to explain and encourage those that are seeking to marry that marriage is a holy estate instituted by God. Marriage was ordained for the life-long companionship, help and comfort which husbands and wives ought to have for each other. The author’s deepest focus points are: Life-long Marriage and Finding the Right Mate.

Many married couples do not keep the marriage vows they made. Because of that, I recommend marital counseling before marriage. The author does not focus too much on divorce because of his disbelief in divorce. It was Moses that executed the bill of divorce. He did it to protect the women because husbands would divorce their wives for anything just to marry another woman.

Women have a moral personality and are not a thing that men may hand over to another, and then take her back again at his pleasure.

The author believes there is not law instituting or commanding divorce. Most people use Matthew 19:9, where Jesus was only explaining what Moses meant. The marriage that God wants is a marriage of a life-long commitment; a forever happy home!

CHAPTER I

THE MARRIAGE

Marriage is that relationship between man and woman under whose shadow alone there can be true reverence for the mystery, dignity and sacredness of life. Scripture represents marriage not merely as a Mosaic ordinance, but as part of the scheme of creation, intended for all humanity. Its sacredness goes back to the very birth of man.

They do less than justice to this divine institution who views it in no other light than a civil contract. There is a vital difference between a marriage and a contract. In a contract the mutual rights and obligations are the result of an agreement, and their selection and formulation may flow from the momentary whim of the parties. In the marriage relationship, however, such rights and obligations are high above the arbitrary will of both husband and wife; they are determined and imposed by religion as well as the civil law.

In the book of Genesis, we read: Jehovah God built the rib which he had taken from the man into a woman and brought her to the man. And the man said, This now is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh (Genesis 2:22-24). The Lord Jesus Christ also says the same in Matthew; Have ye not read, that He which made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, for this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they twain shall be one flesh. Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh (Matthew 19:4-6). It is clear from these passages that the woman was created from the man, and that each has an inclination and capability of reuniting themselves into one. That the reunion is unto man (humanity) is also plain from the book of Genesis, where both together are called man (humanity), a male and a female created He them … and called their name man (humanity)", (Genesis 1:27; 3:22-24) meaning all of mankind.

Marriage love that is truly conjugal arises between a wedded pair who is in such conjunction with the Lord because the above passages clearly prove that marriage is originated by God. From this, it is plain first that love truly conjugal is from the Lord alone and that it is with those who are in conjunction with good and truth from God. Because this conjunction is reciprocal, it is described by the Lord that they are in Him and He in them (John 14:20). This conjunction or this marriage was so established from creation; the man was so created that he might be an understanding of truth and the woman that she might be an affection of good, that accordingly, the man might be truth and the woman good. When the understanding of truth is with the man it makes the one with the affection of good, which is the woman; there is a conjunction of the two minds into one. This conjunction is the spiritual marriage from which conjugal love descends; for when two minds are so conjoined that they become as one mind, there is love between them. This love, which is the love of spiritual marriage, when it descends into the body, became the love of natural marriage. This is so of anyone, if he will clearly perceive. A married pair who mutually and reciprocally love each other inwardly, in mind, also mutually and reciprocally love each other as to their bodies. It is known, that all love descends into the body from an affection of the mind; and that without this origin no love exists. When good united to truth flows down from the Lord into a lower sphere it forms a union of minds; when into a still love, it forms a marriage. Actually, conjugal love is therefore a union of minds from good united to truth from God.

Marriage is the conjunction of two in one mind. It shall first be explained what the nature of this conjunction is: the mind consists of two parts, of which one is called the understanding and the other the will. When these two parts act as one, they are called one mind. The husband acts the part, which is called the understanding, and the wife the part, which is, called the will. When this conjunction, which is of the interiors, descends into the lower things that are of their body, it is perceived and felt as love. This love is conjugal love. It is plain from this that conjugal love derives its origin from the conjunction of two in one mind. This is called cohabitation; however, it is said that they are not two, but one. For this reason a married pair are not called two, but one. There is such a conjunction of the husband and wife even in the inmost, who are of their minds, comes from creation itself.

They, who are in love that is truly conjugal, look to what is eternal because there is eternity in that love. Its eternity is from the fact that love increases with the wife and wisdom with the husband to eternity; and in this increase the married pair enter more and more interior into the blessedness of God. They who are in love, that is truly conjugal, look to what is eternal; but if this vanishes from the inmost of their thoughts, they are disunited as to conjugal love. As love that is truly conjugal endures to eternity, it follows that the wife becomes more and more a wife and the husband more and more a husband. The actual reason is that in a marriage of truly conjugal love, each becomes a more and more interior man. For this love opens the interior of their minds and as these are opened, man becomes more and more a man; and in the case of the wife, she becomes more and more a wife, and with the husband, it is to become more and more a husband. The wife becomes more and more a wife as her husband becomes more and more a husband, because it rarely occurs, if ever, that a chaste wife fails to love her husband, but the return of love by the husband fails; and this fails for the reason that there is no elevation of wisdom, which alone receives the love of the wife. Husbands are to demonstrate their self-giving love for their wives by honoring them and showing them respect. The prayer of a husband and wife is important and must not be hindered by misunderstandings in the relationship. The physical strength of men should not become an obstacle to the joint humility required in any praying together.

When those who begin to love one only of the sex, and to desire her to wife, this is the fundamental love of all loves, and especially during the period of betrothment, while it is lingering and progressing to the nuptials; and at length at the nuptials, and during the first days which follow them. All joys and all delights from first to last are gathered into the fundamental love of all loves.

It is evident from this that the earliest love of marriage emulates love that is truly conjugal and causes it visibly to appear in a certain image. This takes place because the love of sex, which is unchaste, is then cast away and the love of one of the sex, which is a love truly conjugal and chaste, sits implanted in its place. Who does not then look on other women with indifference, and upon his only one with love? All delights whatsoever that are felt by man are of his love; through them the love manifests itself, exists and lives. Now, as conjugal love is the fundamental of all good loves, it is inscribed on the very lease things of man and, as was shown before, it follows that its delights exceed the delights of all loves and also that it imparts delight to them according to its presence and at the same time its conjunction with them. It expands the inner most things of the mind, and at the same time, the inner most things of the body as the