The Gay Dating Rules: The Bible of Gay Dating

By Doron Braunshtein

New York City is the loneliest place in the world. Only if you are living in this amazing, destructive, over-the-top, noisy, dirty, fabulous fucked-up place, you know what I am talking about. As much as this place is huge and full of opportunities, it’s also lonely, cold, and presses you to do things that, trust me, you would never even think of doing if you were living in a place with more trees and nature, no subways or crowded streets - let’s say... a suburb in fucking Boston.

If you are a single gay man in New York City, even one with ideals, high morals and standards, forget about it, you will find yourself doing things and meeting people you would not believe, looking back, you ever dated.
But don’t blame yourself - never blame yourself! Blame New York! Blame your ex-boyfriend! Blame your screwed-up parents that screwed you over and made you the horny, lonely, desperate gay that you are today! So... please blame someone else! It is much better for you than looking inwards and blaming yourself...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Doron Braunshtein
• Release date: Jun 23, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370255269

Doron Braunshtein

Doron Braunshtein (born May 2, 1976), better known by his pseudonym Apollo Braun, is a musician, author, and former owner of two boutique shops in the Lower East Side of New York City, both named Apollo Braun. The provocative, politically charged slogans of his self-designed T-shirts brought his boutiques public attention on numerous occasions before the eventual closing of his second boutique in 2009. He released his debut album in 2001 and has since released many more. His song "Party in My Pants" appeares in the film Religulous. In 2015, Apollo appeared on the Israeli TV show HaKokhav HaBa (English: The Next Star), where he sang two original songs. Braunshtein's music consists primarily of spoken word, and often references or sexualizes celebrities, politicians, and religious figures. He began writing books in 1999 and has since published 10 books in English, and 20 more in his native language Hebrew. The content of his writing includes philosophical essays, plays, poems, and frequently concerns sexuality (Braun is himself openly biseuxal).

Book preview

The Gay Dating Rules:

The bible of gay dating

By: Doron Braunshtein

(Also known - to some degree - as Apollo Braun)

Copyright © 2013 by Doron Braunshtein.

All rights reserved to Doron Braunshtein. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.

Edited by: Yael Avraham.

Book design by: Orit Sissman.

Lev Books Publishers

First edition: 2013.

Printed in Israel.

This book is dedicated to all the gay guys out there whose hearts were broken by the wrong guy. (Ah, yes, and also to Tom Cruise, of course…)

Foreword

New York City is the loneliest place in the world. Only if you are living in this amazing, destructive, over-the-top, noisy, dirty, fabulous fucked-up place, you know what I am talking about. As much as this place is huge and full of opportunities, it’s also lonely, cold, and presses you to do things that, trust me, you would never even think of doing if you were living in a place with more trees and nature, no subways or crowded streets - let’s say… a suburb in fucking Boston.

If you are a single gay man in New York City, even one with ideals, high morals and standards, forget about it, you will find yourself doing things and meeting people you would not believe, looking back, you ever dated.

But don’t blame yourself - never blame yourself! Blame New York! Blame your ex-boyfriend! Blame your screwed-up parents that screwed you over and made you the horny, lonely, desperate gay that you are today! So… please blame someone else! It is much better for you than looking inwards and blaming yourself…

1. Don’t meet him on-line!

I know - it is a lot to ask. Any way you look at it, it is the easiest way to meet guys today. Between checking your e-mails and watching porn on your favorite porn-site, you must have an ad somewhere on-line. But remember! It is a rule! A person you are meeting on-line in most cases will have more than one ad. That means, while he meets you through one ad, he probably meets other guys, just for the fun, just to make more friends through other ads he places on other websites (or even worse, through the same website he met you!). So… you need to ask yourself: Do you really want to start a relationship like this? And - do you really want to date someone who’s into multiple dating?

2. Don’t be desperate!

Believe me - self-desperation is more destructive than shooting heroin on a daily basis. Be proud of who you are! Find good characteristics in yourself and write them on a piece of paper. Keep that paper inside a plastic folder in your bag and read it to yourself at least once a day. That way, you will gain some self-respect and some self-esteem within yourself. Then, day-by-day, you will feel less desperate to meet him. If he comes along - great, if he does not - well, at least you will always have the plastic folder with the list of your good characteristics to play with. Ah, yes, and your favorite porn-site, of course.

3. Stop having sex like a slut!

Yes, I know, you are a slut. (don’t we all?). We live in New York City, it’s freezing cold in the winter, hot as hell in the summer (see foreword: always blame something…) and we are all horny like animals in heat. But if you really want to meet him, if you really want to love - and to be loved by someone special and loyal who’s worth your love - you must stop having sex and hooking up with every gay guy you meet (including in the gym, bitch! See Chapter 10). That way, you are clearing your mind and soul (and body) and you are setting your mind towards a better goal (than just fucking a random guy you probably wouldn’t want to see tomorrow).

4. For God’s sake: find a hobby!

Find a hobby or volunteer but do something with your fucked-up life that will fill your time with something more meaningful and interesting (except for drinking alone in your favorite East Village bar). That way you are first: less desperate (see Chapter 2). Second: you open

Reviews for The Gay Dating Rules

[Alfonso Fletes · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I think every gay guy or any person should read this quick and fun book but full of good advice. Enjoy!