For the Love of Cancer: A Passionate Pursuit to Understand Life, Death & Spirituality

By Julie Davis Tittenhofer

Healing from the loss of a loved one can be a little less painful with reassurance from someone who has traveled that same path. For the Love of Cancer: A passionate pursuit to understand life, death, and spirituality was born from the author’s personal journey as her husband’s cancer caregiver and her immense grief from his untimely death in a motorcycle accident.

In this book, Julie Davis Tittenhofer shares the most intimate details of her journey from falling in love with her husband to her discovery of spirituality and faith in God. In her quest to understand why bad things happen to good people, she discovers her purpose in life and passionately pursues it. Her growing faith and belief in life after death grew out of the otherwise inexplicable spiritual experiences that occurred following her husband’s death.

This book offers understanding to those suffering from grief or depression while also providing a healing pathway for the reader to follow. The final chapter “Lessons Learned” provides quick tips for dealing with the loss of a loved one that can be referenced throughout the grieving process without having to revisit the book in it’s entirety.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Feb 1, 2012
• ISBN: 9781620950449

Book preview

FOR THE LOVE OF CANCER

A passionate pursuit to understand life, death, and spirituality

by

Julie Davis Tittenhofer

For the Love of Cancer

A Passionate Pursuit to Understand Life, Death, and Spirituality

© 2012 by Julie Davis Tittenhofer. All rights reserved

This book may not be duplicated in any way without the express written consent of the author, except in the case of brief excerpts or quotations for the purpose of review. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photographic, recordings, or otherwise) without the prior permission of the author. The information contained herein is for the personal use of the reader and may not be incorporated in any commercial programs or other books, databases, or any kind of software without the written consent of the author. Making copies of this book or any portion of it for any purpose is a violation of the United States copyright laws.

ISBN: 9781620950449

Cover designed by Nehmen-Kodner: http://www.n-kcreative.com

Written by Julie Davis Tittenhofer. 

Published & Distributed by BookBaby

http://inspiritwidowedyoungsupportgroup.org/

[e-mail]

Dedication

This book is dedicated in loving memory of my husband, Robert Nick Tittenhofer, Jr., and is also dedicated to you, the reader, for having the courage to face the many life trials you have been given. It is my belief that you are not reading this book by accident, but rather, as part of a much larger, predestined plan.

I am eternally grateful to my mother who encouraged me to take a leap of faith and write this book. Without her love and support, this book would not exist. I would also like to thank my former pastor and friend, Dave Willis, and other close friends for giving me the inspiration and content found within the pages.

About the Author

Julie Davis Tittenhofer is a former lawyer, healthcare administrator and the recent founder and President of Inspirit-Widowed Young Support Group, Inc. Having been her husband’s caregiver through a long battle with colon cancer and then losing him in a tragic accident, she has journeyed through life, love, death, grief and spirituality.

A member of the Georgia Bar Association and the American Bar Association, Julie graduated from Mercer University School of Law and went on to practice civil litigation before returning to work in healthcare. Today, she spends much of her time helping young widows and widowers manage and heal from their grief while simultaneously uncovering their life purpose. For more information about Julie Davis Tittenhofer, please visit http://inspiritwidowedyoungsupportgroup.org/

Contents

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Chapter 1    The Love Story

Chapter 2    All Good Things Must End

Chapter 3    Laughing at Cancer

Chapter 4    Spiritual Awakening

Chapter 5    Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?

Chapter 6    Passionate Pursuit

Chapter 7    When You Fail, Don’t Blame God!

Chapter 8    Imperfect People

Chapter 9   Lessons Learned

Appendix

Appendix 2

Acknowledgments

I have enormous gratitude to Pastor Dave Willis, who unknowingly gave me the tools to write my testimony in this book. Had I not met him, I would not be who I am today, and this book certainly would not exist. Dave taught me many things along the way, beginning with our first meeting. I will never forget the words he said— I don’t believe in accidents—meaning our coming together was planned by God for some perfect reason and at the perfect time. I later learned the full meaning of that very simple statement.

To my mother and my friend, I cannot thank you enough for your unending support, even when at times finding comforting words was difficult. You have shared much of my heartache during my life trials, and you have celebrated my successes. For this, I am eternally grateful.  You are the matriarch of our entire family and the one to whom we all look for advice and support. You cannot imagine the admiration I have for you; I would not be half the woman I am without you. 

I would be remiss if I didn’t offer a special thanks to my dear friends Noel, Kathy, and Karen for their love and support. Each of you shared my grief along the way and always seemed to know just what I needed and when. You are amazing people and amazing friends, and I am so fortunate to have you in my life. Noel, a special thanks to you for always bringing me back to God, even when I strayed or doubted. Unlike me, you never wavered. 

To my editor and friend, Bobbi Linkemer, simply knowing that God strategically placed you into my personal life was a continual reminder that I was destined to write this book. I am honored to know you and honored that you took the time (when you had little to give) to edit my manuscript. 

Finally, I owe my life to my Lord and Savior, who carefully placed each of these people in my life as part of a masterful plan. While it took me many years to develop my relationship with Him, He will live forever in my heart and soul and drives each and every decision in my life. I will live forever in His grace and for His Glory.

Introduction

This book is intended to achieve one essential purpose: to bring hope into your heart, regardless of what difficulty you may be going through. The unimaginable pain I suffered after tragically losing my best friend, husband and soul mate was the inspiration and motivation for the words that follow. As I personally began the grieving process, I became somewhat obsessed with the notion that there must be an easier and more effective way to grieve. I realize how silly that sounds to most, but my overly logical mind believed that there had to be some method to expedite the process and thus I began a healing journey that ultimately resulted in this book.

While I was struggling with the loss of my husband, I became acutely aware of the pain in the world around us all. As I watched the nightly news I saw tragedy and pain daily, and my heart ached for the families who lost someone or something of importance or value. Often I cried for them. Seeing myself as a strong, willful, and capable person who hurt horribly from my own loss, I wondered how those people who were perhaps less equipped than I could get through it. Not everyone is so tough, I thought, and here I was struggling immensely. To give you some idea of my thinking, I asked some friends and family to describe my character in five words or less. The two adjectives that came up several times were strong and courageous. So you see, I wondered, if the process was this difficult for me, how could I possibly make it easier for others? 

As you will discover throughout this book, I learned that each of us is perfectly equipped to handle whatever tragedy enters into our life. It matters not what adjectives your friends would use to describe you. With that understanding, I also learned that coping begins with hope. If you do not have hope that you will heal from your pain, and hope that something good will result from it, your equipment will fail, you will fail, and the grief will consume you and your life.

I was told of a tragic story of a mother and father whose sixteen-year-old son was killed in a car accident by a drunk driver. Unfortunately, such things happen all too often. In a short version of the story, the mother, although suffering immense grief, locked her heart to God and her faith and always remained hopeful. The father did not. He turned to alcohol to numb his pain. The result was more pain, anger, resentment and bitterness, and eventually the marriage was broken. The father died only five years later, and many said he