The Narratives II: Dusk Or Dawn: The Narratives, #2

By Vince Guaglione

The Narratives series of works is a collection of short introspective essays written by an average guy in an effort to better understand himself, his life, and his relationship with the world around him while traveling the road of self-discovery. These works can best be described as the author's unique brand of journaling, encompassing both self-reflective entries, and an expression of thoughts and opinions surrounding social issues of the present day.

The Narratives II: Dusk Or Dawn continues where volume one leaves off, as the author begins to make sense of his plight while continuing to struggle with certain aspects of his loss. The full range of the author's emotions are on display for readers to soak in, and although he realizes he still has a long way to go on this healing journey, he finds the inner strength to press on, and continues to seek out that proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

The Narratives II: Dusk Or Dawn, is the second volume in The Narratives series.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Vince Guaglione
• Release date: Mar 25, 2016
• ISBN: 9781524267032

Book preview

The Narratives II

Dusk or Dawn

Vince Guaglione

Text copyright ©2013 Vincent P. Guaglione

All Rights Reserved

For

The Guaglione family

The Iezzi family

and

My three musketeers,

who have always believed in me,

have been unwavering in their support,

and have always had my back:

Julie

Jaimeleigh

Chandra

You are the best!

Acknowledgements

Once again, a very special thanks goes out to Kristy Cannon and the entire Starbucks Brier Creek crew.

Over the past year I’ve gotten the chance to get to know many of you personally, including Trevon, Nick, Madelyn, Ashley, Alyssa, Jayme, Nikki, Dori, and Leslie, and it has been a most rewarding experience. Thank you for making me a part of the Starbucks Brier Creek family.

Table of Contents

I – 89 Days

II – Letting Go:  It’s Harder Than You’d Think

III – The Metaphysical: Part I

IV – The Metaphysical: Part II

V – Journaling:  Then and Now

VI – The Domino Effect

VII – Social Media:  The Preferred Medium for Airing Dirty Laundry

VIII – Texting:  A Disruption of Epic Proportions

IX – The Right to Remain Boxed In

X – Isolationism

XI – Going It Alone

XII – It’s About Connections

XIII – Dusk or Dawn

About the Author

I – 89 Days

89 days...

That’s how many days it’s been since I wrote the final entry of the first volume of this work... 

That’s how many days it’s been since I last put pen to paper, and I last felt a sense of accomplishment...

That’s how many days I have stagnated...

That is my world in a nutshell.  It tells you everything you need to know about my true essence.

89 days...

It’s not very long in the grand scheme of things, but an eternity in the sea in which I swim.

When I first set off on this journey, I hoped to make some sense of my thoughts and feelings, and also gain some perspective on my life. What I learned went far beyond anything I could ever imagine. Not only did I recapture my voice, but I recaptured my soul. It’s a rather difficult concept to describe, let alone put down on paper: I would describe it as a firmer sense of understanding what I’m all about – what I stand for, what I live for, what I care about, and what my purpose is. Without it, I’m just a shell of a human being, wandering aimlessly through time.

One could say that reaching this stage of enlightenment is enough; that everything else is just the icing on the cake. And if I were going to look back and say, Ok, I’m cool with this, it would certainly be more than acceptable, and I doubt anyone would argue the point. But in my world, there’s always another layer to peel back, always another level to jump, always another mountain to climb.

I’m not done...

I’ll never be done...

I’ll never give up.

For a brief period of time, there was rest and an enjoyment of the moment. Living in the moment is a difficult proposition for me at best but somehow, some way, I was able to revel in it. But not long thereafter, that nagging, gnawing feeling came back. That feeling that it was time to get the ball rolling once more, time to meet the inertia head-on, and time to settle into where I’m once again most comfortable – in a perpetual state of motion. 

In 89 days, the pages of the calendar had flipped a few times and the season had changed from fall to winter. My nightly ritual has thus been altered and I’ve gone into a mild hibernation.  Winter always has this effect on me. Originally, the intent was to put the pen down until the warmth had returned, for I have come to understand that that is when I do my best work. But my inner demon made its presence known once again, as it routinely does, rearing up and motivating me to get the process moving forward once more. So here I sit, this time, inside my neighborhood Starbucks coffee house, when I’d rather be out in the warm air, and struggle to make sense of my plight. Since I’m faced with the choice of the lesser of two evils, I will have to make do and let the chips fall where they may. It’s unpleasant to feel that sense of disharmony and to have to fight for every word placed on the page, but it’s what I do to regain some semblance of sanity in the chaos of my world.

In the 89 days that have passed, I have experienced the highs and lows of life, felt both the euphoria of the exciting and the despondency of the monotonous. It is what it is, and it’s the same for all of us. But every now and then when we think we have it all figured out, life throws us a curveball, and only then do we realize there’s more to our universe than meets the eye. There’s more to question, more to discover, more to understand.

The time that has passed has felt just right, moving neither too slow nor too fast. It served a purpose and has left me in a good place from which to begin anew. The only outstanding question on this 89th day is where does it go from here? 

So begins the next phase of the journey.

II – Letting Go:  It’s Harder Than You’d Think

January... 

Middle of winter...

72 degrees...

Its days like these when I don’t miss the north one bit. The warmth never travels as far north in the dark season as it does here. For this I am thankful, especially when I’m troubled and need the warm air and the outdoors to help me clear my head. It’s early evening and the sun has already set, a few hours sooner than the ideal in my world, but I will make do and work with what I have.

This day couldn’t have come at a better time; for it is perspective that I need.

The one-year anniversary of the death of my significant other passed just ten days ago. The day itself was nondescript. I’d put everything away, boxed all of it up, and stashed it in neat little compartments in my head. I felt fine on the day of, and after a brief period of reflection I felt as if it was just another day in the lineup of days before ending the week.  There were