Long Nights: Short Years

By Julie Carlyle

I think the most precious gift I have ever been given is that of motherhood. It is a simple concept if you know about the “birds and the bees,” but the actual act of mothering isn’t something you are born knowing how to do. Well into it, I’m still not sure I can attest to doing it with a lot of ease, but I can certainly attest to doing it with a lot of prayer!

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Oct 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9781483546346

Book preview

Author

Prologue

I think the most precious gift I have ever been given is that of motherhood. It is a simple concept if you know about the birds and the bees, but the actual act of mothering isn’t something you are born knowing how to do. Well into it, I’m still not sure I can attest to doing it with a lot of ease, but I can certainly attest to doing it with a lot of prayer!

I remember, when I was pregnant, many other mothers tried to give great advice … you know the kind: Get your sleep now; you won’t get it once the baby comes (no joke about that!); Remember to sleep while the baby sleeps; and my personal favorite, Make noise while the baby sleeps so it will get used to its surroundings. I’m seeing a lot of references to sleep deprivation here.

First of all, I want to say that as a pregnant woman you get all kinds of advice, some useful, some not so useful, but all meant with good intentions. I wanted to write this book as both comic relief and a useful tool to really explain and debunk the parenting myths. There is no perfect earthly parent—and I can promise you there are no perfect babies either—but there is a perfect answer to parenting: pray, enjoy each minute (even the difficult ones), and pray some more.

Now, back to all that sleep advice I got early on, back when the pregnancy test strip was barely showing the solid line. You would have thought I could put two and two together to figure out sleep wouldn’t be an option for the first few years. That’s the first piece of advice I want to debunk before we ever hit Chapter One. After you become a parent, you will NEVER sleep well again. It’s not just about getting them to sleep through the night or not wake when the garbage is picked up at 5 a.m.; those are merely hurdles you jump. Believe me, you are nowhere near the finish line of that race.

As my oldest is on the cusp of adulthood, already fully submerged in the teenage pool of life, I realize that I’ll probably never sleep again until Jesus permanently shuts my lids and I wake up in paradise. From the pregnancy days, when all I wanted to do was sleep and dream about what it would be like to hold that precious little bundle, to the baby days, when I just dreamed of putting him down long enough to shower by 8 p.m., and so on until now, almost to (dare I say it?) his manhood, I just wish I had known then what I know now. I also wish I could have some foreknowledge of what’s to come too, but, most important, I’ve wanted to go back to those first precious days and give my advice, as clearly and concisely as I remember, of the real story of mothering … the no-holds-barred story that doesn’t sugar-coat the truth but exposes how you earn the much beloved battle scars of motherhood that will eternally provide you with countless memories of joy and delight.

For new parents: I hope you will not only enjoy the memories and advice, but relate to them firsthand. For those of you who have been around the parenting block: you should quickly relate, laugh and thank God you made it through! Finally, for those of you not yet embarking on the parenting adventure: why in the world are you reading this book in the first place? Just kidding, the very sum you paid for this book shows you care greatly about the task of being parents that may one day be before you. In addition, you are thankfully helping to provide for the college education of my three. For all of you: read quickly and soak in the long nights and short years of parenting…

Chapter 1

MORNING SICKNESS, BAGGY CLOTHES & CRAVINGS

I remember distinctly each of the three times I saw the straight line on the stick indicating I was pregnant (I still have them all too). I also remember, more fondly with the first, thinking, Wow, I’m going to be a mother. I’m sure many women have thought and even said this simple little phrase at some point in their lives, but little do you know at that moment in time how those few words will impact the rest of your life.

If you are a first-time mother reading this, you will certainly take note of how much excitement is tied to that first pregnancy. It’s all about you and this is your show. You can sleep the days and nights away as the exhaustion of growing this little person takes place. You can really milk the morning sickness and your husband will bring you endless amounts of ginger ale and an unlimited supply of cold cloths. Hey, he might even apply them to your brow as you hug your porcelain throne. As the first few months of pregnancy progress you will excitedly purchase new maternity outfits that let everyone know you are with child. You will do all this with much anticipation and delight. You will begin to have strange cravings and your every wish and desire will be met as your husband drives all over town, at all hours of the night—after he’s only just gotten home and delivered a bag of take-out thirty minutes previously. You will bask in the glory of being able to eat foods that before would cause you to do an extra hour on the stair climber, all in the name of pregnancy. I have just one more simple little phrase for this group, Enjoy it while it lasts!

Now, I am sure you have all heard the old saying, All good things must come to an end. Well, this most certainly is one of them. The firsts of pregnancy are always the most remembered and spoiled, understandably so, because they are, well, the firsts. After you do something more than once, it just gets old—not bad, just done before—and the expectations set in place by the first time just aren’t there the